Circumstances can bring out the worst in people, even in the men we trust. And at times, these very circumstances lead to a date rape. A date rape may be sensitive to discuss, but these date rape facts are something all girls have to be wary of.
Understanding date rape and date rape facts
It’s fun to go out on a date with a guy, especially if you really like him or have had a small crush on him since forever.
You feel fuzzy and warm when he holds your hand or kisses your neck.
But at times, the guy might just start pushing his luck a bit too far.
It might feel really weird to go on but you don’t want to offend him by stopping him. And even if you do stop him, he might just persist or plead and force himself onto you.
You feel helpless, especially if you’re under the influence of alcohol.
At times, you might feel dizzy and an uneasy sense of physical urge may overpower you, though you hate it.
Unfortunate circumstances like these can create miserable situations where you can get molested sexually, and worse, at times, get raped.
Date rape is a devastating crime for every victim. But it’s also a known fact that most of the times rape is committed by people you know, rather than strangers on the street.
Date Rape facts
Date rape is a sexual attack by someone you know, and it is more common than you think. Women are most at risk from new partners, former partners, and men they date occasionally.
Date rape is not an isolated case, but is usually hushed up because you know the person already, and don’t know how to handle it. He may be a friend or a past lover, with whom you came out to spend time and catch up on things.
A Date Rape Story
Sheryl, a student, once had a narrow escape with a date rape. “I had a very good friend of mine, with whom I used to hang out all the time. We used to occasionally go to his farm an hour away from the city, and have a drink or two,” she says.
“One day, when we were at the farm, he asked me to kiss him. I burst out laughing and told him to shut up. He pestered me for a long time, and finally I told him that I would kiss him just once, and we would forget all about it. I gave him a peck on his lips and then backed away. But he just grabbed me and began running his hands all over my body.
I felt so violated, but I didn’t know what I could do. I mean this guy was supposed to be someone I trusted a lot. I pushed him, and ran away from there. He called me up later in the evening and apologized saying it was his drink that made him act that way. I slammed the phone down, and never spoke to him after that. The worst part was that I couldn’t mention this incident to anyone else.”
Date Rape at Parties
Another thing to watch out when you’re at a party is your drink. There are several date rape drugs that can easily be picked up over the counter if you know the pharmacist, and these drugs can render a person unconscious and also induce short term memory loss, which gets worse when mixed with alcohol.
The victim usually would get up feeling very tired and sore, but would have no memory of any physical harassment or rape.
Can You Get Raped on a Date?
It is very important to be alert and careful when you’re out, even if it’s with a friend. If you feel nauseous, dizzy or start blacking out, ask a trusted girlfriend to get you to a safe place immediately, or call someone who can help you, even your parents.
Don’t hesitate at these moments, even if it’s just a hunch.
Don’t accept a lift or help from anyone else. There is every possibility that the very person who wants to help you could turn out to be the potential rapist.
Most of the times, almost always, date rapes happen at a known place, either your house or at a friend’s place.
What Should You Do if You’ve Been Raped on a Date?
First of all, remember that it’s not your fault that it happened. You were either forced into it, knowingly or unknowingly, or you probably weren’t in a state to prevent it.
Rapes are usually never reported because of all the guilt. You might feel dirty, ashamed and violated. But you should know that rape is a crime too, and just like in any other case, the attacker is the only one who should be ashamed.
Do You Think You’ve Been Raped on a Date?
If you have been raped or wake up with flashbacks of a possible rape, get to a hospital or a doctor as soon as possible. Don’t wash or change your clothes. Contact the police immediately and insist that urine and blood tests be taken.
If you were drugged and forced into the act, the evidence of the drug usually stays in the body from 5 to 8 hours up to 48 hours, depending on the drug used. Get checked for sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancy and consider having an AIDS test.
It might be hard to get over the thought, and you may suffer from a lot of guilt and extreme reactions within you. You might lose your confidence, feel worthless, or go into depressions. If you feel any of these emotions, it is very important that you seek counseling, or talk to a trusted friend or a family member.
How to Avoid Getting Raped on a Date
It’s a very well known and clichéd adage “it’s better to be safe than sorry”, but it’s one of the things that you should understand.
Tip #1 Always trust your instincts. They may seem too farfetched at times, but most of the times your instinct never lets you down.
Tip #2If you feel someone is creepy, don’t put up with them, and don’t accept drinks from them, or stay around them.
Tip #3 When you’re at a pub, always keep the drink with you at all times, even if it means hitting the dance floor with a drink in your hand.
Tip #4 If you have to visit the loo, maybe you should think about ordering another glass when you come back to your table.
Tip #5 Don’t share or swap drinks. It’s fun to try out the different cocktails all of you are having, but you never know where things might just turn wrong for you.
But even with all this in your mind, if you are ever a victim of a date rape or a sexual assault, remember that it’s not your fault and the best way to deal with it is by reporting it to the cops.
We all know that most girls who get raped on a date never reveal it, but why let some pervert get away with a cheap dirty trick that could scar you forever, when you have a choice to put him behind bars.