Moving out of your parent’s house can be daunting. But don’t worry, we have all the tips you need to make this huge life transition a little bit smoother.
There comes a time when every baby bird has to leave the nest. We know that’s such a cliché, but it’s true. Eventually, we all have to move out of our parent’s house. But just because it’s something that everyone has to do doesn’t mean it’s easy.
If you know that your time to spread your wings has come, but you don’t actually know what to do, don’t worry. We have all the information to make this new, exciting *and scary* time in your life easier.
[Read: Living alone – 41 must-knows, signs you’re ready, and the secrets to thrive]
Signs it might be time to move out on your own
Maybe you know that you need to move out. Or maybe you don’t. Or maybe you do but you just need a kick up the rear-end to get you going. Either way, these are the signs that will tell you all you need to hear to start packing.
1. You have a full-time job
When people continue to live with their parents well into adulthood, it’s usually because they can’t afford their place. So, if you have a full-time, well-paying job, there’s really nothing keeping you at your family home.
2. You aren’t caring for your parents
Life can hit us hard. There’s no harder-hitting time than when our parents fall ill and need our support. Sometimes, people have to move back in with their parents to take care of them in their old age.
However, if your parents are fit and well, and you’re not acting as their caretaker, you should focus on your independence. [Read: Important habits you need to be more independent]
3. You feel suffocated
This feeling of not being able to breathe in your own home is your body’s way of telling you to move out! You need your own space to unwind and feel comfortable. When your parent’s home is no longer the place you can do that, it’s a sign that you need to find a home of your own.
4. You still have a curfew
You’re an adult, you don’t need to live under your parent’s curfew!
That’s not to say that your parents are being unreasonable. It’s their home, and if they don’t want to be woken up by you coming home at 2 AM, that’s totally understandable. However, if your parent’s expectations and lifestyles no longer match up with yours, it’s time to move out and set your own rules. [Read: 20 lifestyle changes to make in your 20s for a better life]
5. Your parents are charging you rent
If your parents are charging you rent, it means you’re in a fortunate enough situation to be able to afford rent. Lucky you!
If you’re already paying rent to your parents, you might as well pay rent to a landlord. It’s no different, except you get a bucket-load of freedom and the chance to carve out your own life.
6. You find every excuse to avoid going home
After a long day, your home should be your respite, your safe space to finally relax and unwind. But if you do anything and everything to avoid going home, even sitting in the park until it gets dark, you need to consider finding your own home! [Read: Really quick stress busters to recharge your mind]
7. All of your friends have moved out
We don’t mean that you should compare your life to your friends. Everyone moves at different paces in life in different directions. However, if you’re the last person your age that hasn’t moved out of your parent’s house, it might be a sign that it’s time to do so.
8. Your younger siblings have moved out
If all of your younger siblings have moved out, it’s definitely a sign to follow suit! You don’t want to fall behind and you don’t want to be stuck in the past, so invest in your future and move out of your parent’s house. [Read: Self-concept – how we create and develop it to control our happiness]
9. Your dating life doesn’t exist
You’re living under a curfew so you can’t stay out late on dates. And you don’t want to bring a date over because you don’t want them to meet your parents so soon. So, what do you do? Usually, the easiest option is to do nothing!
But you don’t want to have a dead and buried dating life just because you live with your parents. Now’s the time to get out there and explore the dating world. If you need to move out to do that, then so be it. [Read: 16 most common dating problems of twentysomething women]
10. Your bedroom has become the guest room
We’ve talked a lot about signs that you want to move out on your own, but there are also signs that your parents want you to leave your nest. If your bedroom has become the guest bedroom, that means that they see your stay as temporary until you find a place of your own.
Basically, you’re on a timer.
11. Your parents still make your doctor’s appointments for you
You’re a grown adult now, so your mom shouldn’t be making calls to the doctors on your behalf. It’s time to grow up, and the first step to do that is to move out of your parent’s house.
12. Your parents still keep tabs on you
There’s a big difference between wanting to know about your day to stay in touch and to keep tabs on you. If you feel like your parents are still hounding you to know things like what you’re doing, where you’re going, and who you’ll be with, it’s time to get out.
You’re an adult now! Maybe they won’t see you that way until you move out. [Read: Overprotecting parents – 28 signs, psychological effects, and how to deal]
13. You don’t invite anyone over
Whether it’s because your parents don’t like having other people in their home or because you’re embarrassed to hang out with people in your bedroom like a couple of teenagers, your social life is affected because of it.
14. Your social life is basically just hanging out with your parents
There’s nothing wrong with spending time with your family. In fact, it’s great! But if they’re the only people you hang out with… it might be time to move out and make some new friends.
15. You lack privacy
You’re in your twenties now, so you need your privacy! If your parents just aren’t accepting that or if you’re struggling to keep things private living in a crowded house, then it’s time to move out and find your own space.
Trust us, the abundance of privacy you get in your own home will blow you away after living with your parents for so long! [Read: 23 secrets to set personal boundaries and guide others to respect them]
16. You’ve never paid a utility bill
There are just some things you have to do, no matter how boring they are. Paying your utility bills is one of them. If you’ve never done that, and you think admitting that to your friends might be embarrassing, then it’s about time you move out and experience the joy of paying your first utility bill.
17. You’re fighting with your parents often
Overstaying your welcome in the family home can cause tensions to rise and arguments to break out between you and your parents.
You don’t want that to happen, especially if you have an otherwise great relationship with them. [Read: 30 life-changing books to read in your 20s and reinvent your life]
18. Your name is still on the chore chart
There shouldn’t even be a chore chart anymore! But if you’re a grown adult with a full-time job and you’re still being reminded by your parents to make your bed and wash the dishes, it’s time to move out. You’re not a teenager anymore, and you need to act like it.
19. You’re no longer in your 20s
We understand that moving out in your 20s isn’t easy for everyone. It can take a long time to get on your feet and earn a stable income big enough to move out. However, if you’re in your 30s, you’ve had a whole decade to get on your feet.
If you haven’t moved out by now, it’s worth looking at the reasons why. If money or your parent’s health aren’t stopping you, you need to push through whatever it is that’s holding you back. [Read: Interfering parents – all the ways they can affect your love life]
20. Your parents have told you to move out
Out of all the signs, this one is a billboard! There’s no greater sign to move out of your parent’s house than being told to by your parents.
How to move out of your parents’ house and stay out
On top of moving out, you now have a whole slew of responsibilities to take care of. So, if you want to make this a smooth transition without too many speed bumps, here are some things you’ll have to do if you don’t want to be moving back into your parents in the next six months. Follow these steps and you’ll never move back.
1. Talk to your parents
Well, you can’t just one day up and leave! Sit down with them and tell them that you’re thinking of moving out. There may be some tears, but there will be a lot of excitement.
Plus, they’ll be able to help you with all the things you don’t know how to do yet, like pick a good house and set up your utility bills.
2. Do you know how much it costs to live alone?
Have you done your research? If not, this is the first thing to do. Depending on where you want to live, look at the cost of living in that area. That way, you’ll be able to see if you can actually live there. If not, time to find another neighborhood. [Read: How to be an adult – 27 mature ways to grow up and behave like it]
3. Make a budget
How much money do you make and how much can you spend? It may seem daunting at first, but it’s really not that difficult.
If the rent is $500 and you make $600, well, you won’t have enough money for your expenses. So, write down a list of expenses, including rent, and compare it to your income. You can also use budget apps to help you figure it out as well. [Read: 25 honest, self-reflection questions to recognize the real YOU inside]
4. Have some backup cash
You’ll want to have some savings in the bank for emergencies. If you live far from your family and something happens, you’ll need a plane ticket. So, make sure you have at least $500 in savings to use for emergencies.
5. Time to get a credit card.
Sometimes, you won’t have enough money at the end of the month to pay your bills. This is going to happen at some point, which is completely normal. If your car breaks down or you had to fix the plumbing, these are expenses out of your monthly budget. Have a credit card in your name that you can use if you absolutely need to. [Read: The lazy twentysomething’s guide to saving money]
6. Figure out where you’re going to live
You need to research in advance what neighborhood you want to live in. Look at your lifestyle, where the neighborhood is located in proximity to work, transportation available, and how much rent is.
There’s no such thing as a perfect apartment, but you need to figure out what your priorities are before looking for one. Is being close to work important? Or are you wanting to be in a hip area?
7. Start touring houses
This step might take a long time, so it’s best to get started now! After you pick a general neighborhood, start going on open house tours of available apartments/houses. Bring a friend or a family member so that you can bounce ideas off of each other.
And, most importantly, have a list of things that you’re looking for and questions you want to ask. Things you want to look out for are mold, any recent renovations, signs that the previous tenants were pet owners or smokers, and anything that might be broken or need repairing.
8. Get your friends and family to help you
If you’re not using the help of your parents or friends, which we highly recommend, your move will be costly. What else are friends and family for if not to help you out when you need them? Exactly.
So, if they offer, take it. If they don’t, ask them to help you. Trust us, they’ll be asking you for help when they move out. [Read: Be your own hero – what it means and how to take control of life]
8. Set a moving date
It’s so important that you set a good moving date. You want to make sure that it’s on a day when you know friends and family will be available to help you move your things and that it’s not too close to a work day so that you are *somewhat* unpacked and not likely to lose very important things.
Also, if you want to hire a moving van, you’ll need to know what day you want it! There are a lot of moving parts that you need to balance on your moving day, so picking a good date will help you tremendously.
9. Expect the first month to be the most expensive
You just moved out. There are going to be many things that’ll be missing from your apartment. So, you’re going to be spending a lot of money. Plates, cutlery, bedding, and trust us, so much more!
But on the bright side, these are all one-time purchases, so this isn’t going to happen every month. Save some extra money on the side for these extra expenses.
9. Look for a job well before moving out
If you don’t have a job, don’t move out. Try to lock down a job a couple of months in advance. You don’t want to move out during your probation period at work just in case they decide to let you go. So, plan a couple of months ahead and have a steady income. [Read: How to balance your career, social life, and dating life]
10. Keep all your receipts for the first couple of months
You’ll need a couple of months to settle down and see how much the cost of living really is. Sure, you made an outline before you moved out, but you never really know until you move out and experience it on your own.
So, for the first few months, keep all your bills. At the end of the month, tally up all your bills and see how much you spend in one month. After a couple of months, you’ll know exactly how much you spend.
11. Don’t cut yourself off from your family
You’re not leaving them! You’re just moving out of their house. This isn’t supposed to be a tragic event. You’ll still see your family whenever you want.
Honestly, they’ll love seeing you. You might even find yourselves spending more quality time with them, rather than just sitting and watching TV together. [Read: Sense of self – what it is, 36 signs, tips, and steps to raise it and feel great]
12. Change your address on everything important
You can leave your address unchanged if you live close to your parents. However, if you move further away, change your address on your documents.
Your bills, your doctor’s office, your billing address for your monthly subscriptions—all of those need to come with you, so don’t forget to change them! Plus, your parents don’t want to be your receptionists receiving all your mail, so do them a favor and clear up their mailbox a bit.
13. See your parents as much as you want
When you love your family and you miss them, there’s no such thing as visiting them too often! If you want to go over to their house every weekend, why not? They’re your family. Just because you moved out, doesn’t mean you’ve been disowned.
So, if you need to spend time with your family every day, do it. If you only want to see them once a week, that’s also fine. You do what makes you and them feel comfortable. But, maybe call before popping by. You know, manners. [Read: How to deal with loneliness – ways to bring you back to life]
14. Celebrate this big step
No matter how excited you are during the day, your first night could be… weird. You might not necessarily be scared of being alone, but you might find it weird to sleep in a place with no one else around. So, instead of being on your own, celebrate!
Have a housewarming party and celebrate with your friends and family. Make this a joyous occasion, because it is.
[Read: Finding peace – how to calm your mind and make peace a state of mind]
If you follow these tips for how to move out of your parents’ house, your transition won’t be hard. And think of it like this, now you won’t have to creep out of your house in the middle of the night.
