Nobody’s relationship is perfect. Even if you have a really healthy partnership, you can still go through lulls where you might feel like you’re losing your partner. Knowing how to keep a relationship going strong will help you get right back to your happy selves.
The difference between a relationship that’s getting stale and the end of a relationship is what you do about the boredom you both feel. When you notice that your relationship is slowly slipping away, you need to take action in order to save it. You can’t just sit back and hope it fixes itself.
Boredom kills many relationships
The truth of the matter is that a lot of relationships end because both people stop trying. Relationships are a lot of work. You don’t just get to sit back and enjoy the ride. That ride is only enjoyable if you make it so and that means putting forth some effort to keep it fun.
Your relationship only gets boring if you stop trying to have fun. And that feeling of boredom often leads to the feeling of your partner slipping away. You can easily save a relationship and ensure its longevity by simply trying. [Read: 15 reasons you’re bored with your relationship]
How to keep a relationship going
If you feel like your relationship is stuck in a rut and it’s slowly slipping away, you’ll want to know how to keep a relationship going. Here are the way you can make an effort and hold on to your relationship. You may even be able to make it better than it’s ever been before.
#1 TALK to each other. Why do couples not communicate? It’s always mind-blowing to hear when people are having issues in their relationship and yet they’ve never told their partner what they’re unhappy about. Talk to each other. Communicate. It’s the easiest way to solve your problems. [Read: A guide for effective communication in your relationship]
#2 Figure out the issue. Now that you’re actually talking to each other, pinpoint the problem. What’s something that’s messing up your relationship and making it feel as though it’s slipping away? Both of you need to come clean about what you’re unhappy with in order to find this problem.
#3 Plan date nights. Even if you live together, you need date nights. You have to spend time with one another in order to nurture your relationship. Simply going through the motions will make your relationship boring and unhealthy. Plan the date nights so you can ensure you’ll get that time together.
#4 Enjoy each other’s company without distractions. Yes, put your phone away. Just be together without any added distractions. Go for a walk to get some ice cream and leave the phones behind. Head to the beach and just talk to each other as you bask in the sun. This isn’t a hard thing to do and it’s necessary for the health of your relationship. [Read: 13 naughty date night ideas to add a sexy sizzle to love]
#5 Try to surprise your partner. This will help keep your relationship going more than you’d think. When you actually try to surprise your partner, you start thinking about what they like and dislike and the different ways you can make them happy. That alone will kick start your feeling for them again and you’ll want to do more things to make them happy.
#6 Make sure they know how much you appreciate them. Tell them. Show them. Do whatever you can to make them realize how much you love having them in your life. Otherwise, how should they know?
They can’t read your mind. It’s your responsibility to make sure they know how you feel about them every single day. Yes, every day. If you want to know how to keep a relationship going, be grateful for them and show it. [Read: 25 ways to show your appreciation without words]
#7 Spice up your sex life. A boring sex life could very well be the issue with the two of you. Many couples form their intimacy in the bedroom. If you feel a disconnect, it might be because your sex life is lacking. Spice it up and see if it makes a difference.
#8 Treat it like a new relationship. Remember all the cute things you did for each other when you first started dating? Why don’t you do those things anymore? Sure, the initial enthusiasm has worn off but you still care about them. You still want to see them happy.
#9 Admit that you’re personally somewhat responsible. I can almost hear you denying it right now but it’s true. If your relationship is falling apart, it’s somewhat your fault and also your partner’s fault. You can always be doing something more to fix things.
Come clean with yourself. Own up to the fact that you could be the problem. Both of you could be. But in order to fix it, you need to first acknowledge that you’re part of a bigger problem. [Read: 10 big relationship problems and how to fix them]
#10 Learn something new together. Couples bond a lot deeper when they’re learning something new together. Being in the same starting position with something will help you find common ground when you feel your relationship starting to slip away. Take some cooking classes. Go to a pottery place and pay for lessons. These things could add a fun layer to your relationship, too.
#11 Be present in their lives. You might be saying that you are present in their lives but this could be wrong. Just being in someone’s life doesn’t mean you’re present. You have to actively be a part of their life. Ask about their family. Ask about their friends. Be a part of their life.
#12 Get someone else’s opinion. Sometimes it’s hard for you to see the problems yourselves. If you have a friend who’s around the two of you a lot, ask them if they’ve noticed anything. They might be able to pinpoint something that neither of you can see.
You may also want some professional help. Go see a relationship counselor and get their take on your issues. Find out if your relationship is salvageable and what it takes to save it. [Read: How to know if relationship therapy will help your relationship]
#13 Be silly together. Just be goofy. Don’t take things too seriously. You’ll have a lot more fun together and having fun always leads to a happier, healthier relationship. When you’re both in a good mood, you’ll be more willing to open up about issues and just communicate in general.
#14 Remember why you care about them. Think back to the very beginning of your relationship. Why were you so drawn to that person? Chances are, those things still exist. You’ve just been blinded by time and have grown accustomed to those things. Picking out the things you like and making an effort to see them can help.
#15 Make the relationship your priority. This is just mandatory. A relationship isn’t something you can have on the side. Not a good one, anyway. Therefore, you have to make it a priority. You’ll need to make an effort to keep your relationship in tiptop shape and that’ll save it from ever slipping away.
[Read: How to keep the love alive in a relationship]
Knowing how to keep a relationship going can take a while to learn. Ultimately, you have to figure out how to show you care every day. Make sure you’re making a strong effort to keep your relationship happy and healthy.
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