Jumping into bed with someone you’re seriously into is nerve-wracking enough, but what do guys think after you sleep with them for the first time?
When you sleep with your crush for the first time, after a few dates or maybe just one, you’re wracked with questions and confusion for hours and possibly even days afterwards. But, what do guys think after you sleep with them for the first time?
Sex certainly can confuse everything. You might be friends with someone, and everything is fine. Then, one night you get a little drunk, a little flirty, and end up sleeping together. From that point on, everything is weird and a little confusing. Your friendship seems a little awkward. Of course, sex with a friend doesn’t have to be to be confusing.
This is something I decided to put to my male friends. I was so intrigued by the entire subject that I thought it would be best to get a male take on it. You might be surprised by a few of their responses.
What do guys think after you sleep with them: A male perspective with a female twist!
So, I asked my guy friends this question and received a few mixed answers, but the most common are outlined below. What do you think about them? These might not be the things you’d expect to come up on a list of what do guys think after you sleep with them!
#1 They can’t believe how lucky they are. Firstly, most guys are pretty happy about the fact that they got you into bed. That’s always going to be the first thing they think. So, what do guys think after you sleep with them for the first time?
“I can’t believe how lucky I am!” That’s basically it. You might be panicking that they’re judging you or not, but that’s quite unlikely to be in their mind at this point, or if ever. So, from that response, we should all chill out a little and enjoy the moment more! [Read: How to make sex more enjoyable *Hint* It’s not a textbook answer]
#2 They panic if you want commitment. Rather unsurprisingly, the second most common response was that guys panic that having slept with you once, you’re going to want a full-on commitment and relationship. Of course, that’s probably not the case. Maybe you just wanted a good time for yourself, or maybe you’re happy to see how things go.
They don’t see that side of it, and there is a fear that you’re going to want more than they’re ready for at this time. That doesn’t mean that they’re never going to be ready, but you know, give them a few more weeks! My take on that? Sure, think about what you want, but go with the flow a little and relax. [Read: Should you have meaningless sex? Is it right for you?]
#3 They wonder if you enjoyed yourself. What do guys think after you sleep with them? Did she enjoy it? Did she come? Was she impressed? The guy is likely to be completely preoccupied with wondering whether you enjoyed yourself because that reflects directly on his skills between the sheets!
#4 They wonder if you’ll tell your friends and whether you’ll be complimentary or not. Is she going to tell her friends? What will she say? Again, he’s paranoid about whether you liked it and what you’re going to tell your friends.
A male friend of mine said this was the most important thing to him, because he knows that girls talk to their friends about basically everything.
I reassured him that’s not actually the case all the time. Then I considered it for a minute and realize that he’s probably right! So, if you’re wondering what do guys think after you sleep with them, it’s probably more about his pride and performance than anything else. [Read: 15 sexual questions to ask a guy that’ll reveal what he’s like in bed]
#5 They probably don’t make as big a deal of it as you do. Reality check here. Yes, sex is a big deal to guys but probably not in the same way as you. You might dream about the beginning of something special and spend the rest of the following days thinking back over what happened. Your guy probably isn’t quite so obsessed with it. [Read: How to be a perfect tease and keep him interested after having sex]
#6 They’re not at all bothered about your reputation. If you slept with him quickly, e.g. after the first or second date, you might be worried that he thinks you’re easy. Of course, we all know that women are allowed to do whatever they want with their sexuality. It doesn’t mean a thing, but that doesn’t stop us worrying what the guy thinks.
If you want some good news, what guys think about after you sleep with them has zero to do with your reputation. He doesn’t care. He’s just over the moon that he scored!
#7 They really aren’t thinking about your so-called stretch marks or lumpy bits. I asked my guy friends if they thought much about a girl’s body. More good news is coming your way! They didn’t care at all.
#8 They’re wondering when they can do it again. Truthfully? They’re probably wondering when they can do it again. Sex to a guy is fun and enjoyable. It’s not quite as heavy as we make it out to be. Sure, be careful and responsible. But when you tick those boxes, isn’t sex just fun-filled and a generally happy time?
I say we all take that mind-set from this point on. See sex through the same eyes as a guy who can’t believe he actually managed to get someone like you into bed!
We panic so much about what people think. When you get into bed with someone, you panic even more about everything. Do they think I’m easy? What does he think about my thighs? Is he looking at my stomach? None of these things are in his head at all, he’s just completely over the moon that he’s actually having sex in the first place. [Read: How to tell a guy you want to have sex with him without feeling slutty]
Perhaps that means we should all lighten up a little and actually enjoy the moment. Let’s be honest, so many hang ups and worries can spoil what should be a carefree and enjoyable time. We become so stressed that we don’t enjoy it at all.
Sex is supposed to be fun and enjoyable *when done responsibly, of course*. But we’re all too busy overthinking it. From what my guy friends told me, they’re not actually thinking about anything other than how great it is, so maybe you should do the same!