Everyone thinks that marriage will be like it is in the Disney movies. A princess finds her prince charming, he rescues her from her miserable life, and they happily ride off into the sunset together. But these movies never tell you what happens when the sun rises the next day. No one prepares us for the reality of marriage. Marriage isn’t easy – I know from experience. It takes two people who are equally committed to making each other happy. If you’re trying hard to fix it, but you constantly find these subtle signs of a disrespectful husband in your marriage, it’s an uphill task that’s not easy to face.
So, if you are feeling trapped in your marriage and wondering if your husband is normal, well, let’s take a look at the signs of a disrespectful husband that you shouldn’t overlook.
13 subtle signs of a disrespectful husband
When people are in a relationship, they often don’t see clearly what is really happening. This happens to all of us. That’s why we get defensive when our family or friends point out that our partner is not exactly the nicest person. We instinctually defend them. But what we should be doing is taking their observations to heart, because they see what we don’t.
So if you are wondering if your husband has some deal-breaking flaws, here are the signs of a disrespectful husband that will help you figure out what you need to know, so you can take action to make your life better. [Read: Selfish people – 15 ways to spot them and stop them from hurting you]
#1 He doesn’t ask you about your needs. We all have needs. But some people are people-pleasers, so they don’t pay attention to their own needs. And others are selfish, so they don’t care about other people’s needs. So, if your husband doesn’t ask you what you need, then that is a huge problem.
#2 He doesn’t listen to you. Women need to talk to people. They want to come home and tell their husbands about their day or something else interesting and exciting that happened to them. Or they just want to vent. So if your husband is only interested in watching the game on TV every day and doesn’t listen to you, then he probably doesn’t care.
#3 He doesn’t even talk to you. Do you find that your husband just goes into his man cave every day when he gets home from work? Can you remember the last time you had an actual conversation? If you can’t, well, that’s one of the signs of a disrespectful husband… even though it might not seem like it is. [Read: Dos and don’ts to get your husband’s attention when he ignores you]
#4 He demands sex even when you’re not in the mood. Okay, this is borderline rape. I know most people think you can’t rape your spouse, but believe me, you can. If you are having non-consensual sex with your husband, this is another one of the huge signs of a disrespectful husband.
#5 He orders you around and treats you like a child. Does he tell you what he wants for dinner and that you need to clean the house? Does he bark orders around like you are a child or his slave? If so, then don’t tolerate that. He is not your superior. [Read: 22 warning signs you have a narcissistic husband]
#6 He expects you to cook and clean with no help from him. Marriage should be a partnership. The wife should not be the maid, the cook, and the nanny. You can hire people for that. A husband and a wife should equally share household responsibilities. So if your husband isn’t doing that, then he is being disrespectful to you. [Read: Types of toxic relationships to watch out for]
#7 He never compliments you. We all love to get compliments. Okay, some people are uncomfortable with them because they have low self-esteem. But saying nice things to people about themselves is just polite and loving. So if you never hear anything nice from him, it is one of the signs of a disrespectful husband.
#8 He’s not affectionate. And no, I’m not talking sex. Yes, many men want sex all the time *and some never do*, but sex does not necessarily equal affection. He should hold your hand, cuddle with you on the couch, and hug you on a daily basis. If not, that’s not respectful. [Read: 16 non-sexual touches to feel connected and loved]
#9 He criticizes you. No one should EVER criticize you. Let me repeat… no one should ever criticize you! That’s not to say that they shouldn’t politely and calmly point out that they would like you to make changes, but they need to do it in a polite manner. So, if he’s not doing that, then it’s one of the top signs of a disrespectful husband.
#10 He lays any kind of hand on you. This one should be a no-brainer, but unfortunately, it’s not for many women. Men should NEVER hit you or physically hurt you in any manner what-so-ever. So, you need to hightail it out of there ASAP if he is physical abusive to you.
#11 He isolates you. Does he keep you at home and away from your friends and family? He might even say “it’s for your own good” or “I want you to myself.” That’s one of the huge signs of a disrespectful husband. He is brainwashing you and trying to control your life.
#12 He blames you for everything and never takes any personal responsibility. It takes two to tango. No person in a marriage is completely 100% without blame. So, if he’s always blaming you for everything and anything, then he is being very disrespectful. It means he is emotionally immature and cannot have a healthy relationship. [Read: 25 signs of disrespect in a marriage that should never be tolerated]
#13 He says you’d be nothing without him. This is a form of verbal abuse. Many men use this as a form of control to make their wives think that they can’t survive without them, and that they are no good. They do this because they have low self-esteem and are trying to drag you down to their level. Don’t let him do it.
[Read: 19 unfortunate signs your husband doesn’t love you anymore]
Marriage should be a safe haven – a relationship that comforts you from the cruel outside world. So, if you can relate to any of these signs of a disrespectful husband, you should get help and consider your options to make your life happier.
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