If your end goal is finding a husband, you may always be wondering about the future of your current relationship. Are you wasting your time? Is this going to stay casual forever? Understanding the signs he sees a future with you becomes critical.
We’ve all been there. Anyone that wants their relationship to move on to the next level understands the struggle is real.
But when he isn’t super open about it, and you’re too nervous to ask him straight up, how can you tell if he sees a future with you or not? [Read: Is he the one? How to know for sure]
When it comes to guys, they can be complicated. They are hard to read, and it is annoying. But it seems like when they say things you want to hear, and it always turns out to be a lie. That is why actions often speak louder than words.
Sure, it would be great if a guy just said what he means and meant what he says, but life just is not that fair.
Instead, you need to pay attention to is actions. It can be easier for a guy to show his love and devotion than say it out loud. It feels a lot more vulnerable to admit his feelings and desires. If he puts them out into the world, he could get hurt. He is admitting he is at risk for that.
But, if he does sweet things, is there for you, and just listens, he could be showing you that he wants a future with you, and you might be missing it. [Read: 33 traits of a good boyfriend you should look for in any guy you date]
Before we even get into the signs that he sees a future with you. Let’s discuss why you are looking for signs in the first place. If you are hoping for a future with your boyfriend, you should talk about it.
If you want him to pop the question, there are future topics you should talk about first. Do you both want kids? Where do you want to live? What are your opinions on politics and religion, and money? [Read: These are the 12 questions you must ask before talking marriage]
Now, we get if you have some trust issues. A guy tells you he can’t wait for the future with you and goes on and on about it but then ditches you out of the blue. He leaves you to feed his fish and pack his shit.
Those are the ladies or gents that these signs are for. But, if you trust your guy fully and have no reason to doubt his word, talk. That is the best way to know where his head is at. Signs are fine and dandy, but hearing the truth right from the source will give you the info you’re craving.[Read: Signs he wants to marry and spend the rest of his life with you]
Although just one or two of these signs may not mean too much, adding them up says he sees a future with you. So, be on the look out for these signs. And when you notice them have a conversation to make sure. This way, you will really know what lies ahead for the two of you.
One of the signs he sees a future with you is bringing you around his family. He wants you to spend time with the people closest to him.
Making sure you get along with people he shares his life with will reassure him that a future with you is a good choice. [Read: How to be charming when you meet your boyfriend’s parents the first time]
It is one thing for a guy’s family to accept you and welcome you as one of their own, but when his friends like you, he knows how rare and special that is. A guy’s friends are in a different league than his family, and knowing you fit in with them is a sign he sees a future with you.
A guy that sees a future with you pays attention to the little things. If you once mentioned that you would love to live in a house with a porch, and now he is house hunting for houses with porches, he wants to make you happy. [Read: The actions that reveal a man’s love for you]
This might seem obvious, but if he brings up when you have kids one day or buying a house, he may be thinking about a future with you more than you realized.
A guy who committed to you from the start has a better chance of seeing a future with you. He doesn’t get scared off when things get serious and moves towards the future rather than veering away from it.
If he has given you a key to his place, he trusts you, which is a huge step in any relationship. And if he accepts yours, you are on track to continue your relationship. A guy won’t just give anyone a key. [Read: Is he going to propose? 15 signs he’s ready to go down on one knee]
He asks your opinion about his job, his plans, even his friends. Instead of ignoring your thoughts, he considers your opinion when taking a new job, finding a new place, or even buying a new jacket.
Everything from cleaning to cooking and caring for a pet together says he sees more than right now with you. A future together means you share everything, the good and the bad. And if he is starting that now, he sees it working out. [Read: What does a healthy relationship look like?]
In the same way, he wants to make sure you get along with his friends and family, and he makes an effort with yours. He wants your people to like and accept him. If he wants a future with you, he knows how important those things are.
He doesn’t just reach out to go to dinner or complain about work, but he discusses his fears, dreams, and childhood with you. When a man leans on you and listens to you, this is one of the clearest signs he sees a future with you and respects you. [Read: Affection is the magic spark in long-term relationships]
Sure, everyone lies here or there, but he will not lie about things that are important. He may fib about taking out the trash or leaving the toilet seat up, but he will want you to know he is loyal and that you can trust him. He isn’t about to lie about where he is or who he’s with.
A guy that wants a future with you isn’t just going to want that and be quiet. He knows that the better he gets to know you, the happier you’ll both be. He will always be trying to get to know you better, no matter how long you’ve been together. [Read: 25 deep questions for a girl]
A guy that wants a future with you wants to make you happy. He might be a pain about picking up his socks, but he will do what you ask. If you need his help lifting something, he will get up and do it. He will drive you to the airport. He will stop being lazy for you.
There is something about being with someone forever that puts you at ease. You don’t always need to be on. If you two can sit silently together and do nothing but just love the other’s company, that is a great sign he sees a future with you. You aren’t bored or trying to fill the awkward silence. It just feels nice.
This can be hard to figure out but pay attention. A guy who sees a future with you will make it known. He isn’t going to ignore you or brush off something you want. A guy that wants you will go to your second cousin’s out-of-state wedding. He will buy your mom flowers. He does not put you on the back burner. [Read: What is the right priority in a relationship?]
A guy who sees a future with you is capable of having a future. This guy has a settled life. He has a decent job and supports himself. He pays his bills and doesn’t depend on others for things like cooking and laundry. When he is looking ahead, it is because he is ready for those steps.
A guy that sees a future with you isn’t taking that lightly. He shows you that he is lucky to have you around. It isn’t just about saying thank you but hugging you after you make dinner. He will show how much he cares and wants to be around you by doing things for you and showing that he doesn’t overlook what you do for him.
Every guy is a weirdo. We all know it. But he will not let his true freak flag fly until he is 100% comfortable with you. It could seem like he is trying to scare you if he is doing a weird voice, burping, farting, and talking to you about his weird butt pimple. In reality, he adores you. If he knows you aren’t running away at his grossness he thinks you’re a keeper. [Read: 25 manliest and unmanliest things a guy can do]
A guy who is using you, for now, will cancel plans at the last minute or say things like we never nailed those plans down. If he sees a future with you, he will not give up seeing you. He wants to be around you and doesn’t want to let you down.
As much as words can mean nothing, he will probably tell you if he sees a future with you. He may not come right out with it, but you will notice. He will say things in passing like, “when we live together one day,” or “our future kids.” Pick up on these little things because they mean more than you might think. [Read: 11 signs you can’t trust him]
Just as vital as the signs he sees a future with you are the signs that he doesn’t. Don’t close your eyes to the red flags when they are right in front of you. If you are looking for someone to share your future with, but your current guy displays these signs, it is time to say goodbye.
Alone time is great for couples. You can share intimacy and passion. But a relationship also thrives on sharing time with friends and family. If you only ever spend time together in private, he isn’t ready to share his whole life with you.
Of course, he could just be strapped for cash. But if all you do is hang out on the couch, watch half a movie, and then hook up, he likely sees you as casual. If he isn’t making your relationship move forward, he doesn’t see it going there. [Read: 16 signs he is leading you on]
When someone plans on spending their life with you and can see a future with you, they share everything with you. They will share their past, their future, etc. But if he is private about his exes, family, job, he doesn’t want to share more than the surface level. That means he just wants this for right now.
Say you brought up a concert you want to go to in a few months, and he doesn’t want to nail down plans that far in advance. He isn’t ready for a long-term relationship. If he can’t talk about a few months from now, he probably isn’t thinking about the future beyond what he’s having for dinner. [Read: Things you learn when “the one” becomes just another ex]
If you have been together for a while, but he has yet to make things official, that could be a sign he wants to keep things in the present. Yes, he may not be into labels. But if he’s not calling you his girlfriend when you’ve been together for over six months, it is not a good sign.
Canceling plans is a telltale sign he is waiting for something else to come along. Whether he wants his boys to ask him to hang out or another girl on the side, if he is consistently canceling plans or saying, “let’s play it by ear,” he isn’t taking this seriously.
Intimacy and sex are an important part of a relationship. A well-rounded relationship that has a future has many facets. If more than 70% of your relationship revolves around the bedroom, he has different priorities than you. [Read: 16 big signs he will never marry you and you’re just his maybe girl]
A guy who still eats Pop-Tarts for dinner and has week-old pizza on his counter is not ready to discuss the future. If he is too lazy to clean the apartment or take you out to eat, he definitely is not focused on where your relationship is headed.
Holidays, celebrations, life events. These are all major moments in someone’s life. And more often than not, you share these moments with the person you’re dating. If he is a master at avoiding these moments, he does not see a future with you. [Read: How to handle a guy who is full of shit]
If you are always worried he isn’t ready for the future, that he doesn’t have plans, that your dreams don’t line up, or that he doesn’t take your relationship seriously, he probably doesn’t. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you this, but if your gut is telling you something is off, it probably is.
[Read: Signs your guy thinks you’re the one and is ready to go to the next level]
Seeing the signs he wants a future with you can relieve a lot of curiosity, but there is no sign that it is as much of a sure thing as talking to him about it.
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