12 Sexy Ways to Arouse a Man Even If He Isn’t in the Mood

Sometimes you’re aroused and in the mood when your man just isn’t feeling it. Here’s how to rev his engine when he’s obviously not in the mood.

how to arouse a man

This is a fairly rare phenomenon in my world—but it does happen every now and then, and can be extremely frustrating if you’re looking for a good time. Occasionally, your man just won’t be in the mood to get frisky.

There are a lot of reasons that men just might not be in the mood. Maybe he’s tired, has had a long day, is stressed out, or he just doesn’t think that he’ll perform well for you that day and doesn’t want to be embarrassed.

Regardless, it can put a damper on your mood—especially if you were looking forward to spending some intimate time with him. It can even upset you to the point that you think maybe he doesn’t want to sleep with you—although that’s usually not the reason at all.

Ways to arouse your man even if he isn’t in the mood

If you’re all ready to go and want him to help you out, there are a few things you can do that will make him immediately forget why he wasn’t in the mood, and his attention will be 100% on you. Slip on something sexy and get ready for these 12 ways to arouse your man even if he isn’t in the mood! [Read: 10 subtle ways to get your man in the mood for naughty romance]

#1 Help him relax. When your man isn’t in the mood, it can be because he’s just stressed out! Help him relax a little bit by pouring him a drink, making him some dinner, and even putting on his favorite show.

Ask him if there’s anything he would like right then and do it for him. He will soon feel relaxed and much more willing to do whatever you want him to!

#2 Give him a massage with hot oils. To relax him even further, offer to give him a hot oil massage. There’s almost no way that any man would refuse this. Get him naked, slather him up with oils, and in no time I’m sure he’ll be ready to go.

Take it a step further and take your clothes off halfway through. I mean, why not? He’s already oiled up for you! And with your hands slowly working their way down his body, there’s no way he can resist.

#3 Slip into something sexy. Men are very visual. If he’s just not feeling it and you’re in work clothes or sweats, throwing on some of his favorite sexy lingerie will be sure to get his eyes on you and get him in the mood.

Earn some bonus points by making his dinner and pouring him a drink WHILE wearing lingerie. Seeing you walk around the house, doing him favors, will arouse him no matter what mood he’s in.

#4 Tell him all the things you want him to do to you. Lean in really close and whisper in his ear exactly what you want him to do to you in the bedroom. He will begin visualizing all of this as you are barely touching your lips to his ears. He’ll want to hop off that couch and head to the bedroom straight away! [Read: 10 sexy conversation starters to get both of you really horny]

#5 Put some sexy music on. Dim the lights, put the lingerie on, and turn up the baby-making music! By putting some key music on, he will see that you mean business.

In order to really get the fire going in him, put some music on that has significance to your time spent in the bedroom. Maybe it is your wedding song or the song that was playing for your first time—whatever the case, his mind will go back to how much he wanted it then and that will definitely inspire him now. [Read: The absolute best list of songs for sexy lovemaking]

#6 Kiss him very slowly and leave him wanting more. Lean in very close and give him a long, slow kiss and then walk away without another word. He will be stunned and curious to know what else you have in store for him. This sexy gesture is sure to arouse him!

#7 Text him from another room. Go to your bedroom, remove your clothes, and text him that you’re patiently waiting for him in bed. His curiosity will immediately be piqued and he’ll be wondering what exactly you’re waiting for.

If you want to go a step further, send him a picture of exactly what you look like in bed; he’ll be at the door the second you hit send. [Read: 12 subtle foreplay moves that work ridiculously well on men]

#8 Put on his favorite perfume. If you want to be really subtle about turning him on, just spritz on some of his favorite perfume and then lean in far enough that he can smell it. Not only will he be attracted to the smell, he will also appreciate that you’re subtly trying to get him in the mood.

#9 Talk about the first time you guys had sex. Casually bring up that evening—or morning, who knows—and tell him your favorite parts about it: what he did that you just really loved and how much you want him to do those things again.

Chances are, the first night he was more than in the mood to get naked with you, and by talking about everything you two did, his memory will do the work for you and he’ll be ready to go in no time at all.

#10 Snuggle up close and put his hands right where you want them. Get really close to him, have a minute or two of snuggling, and then slowly take his hands and put them right where you want them. This gesture will not only surprise him, but get him thinking about what he really could do with those hands. [Read: 20 kinky things you can do with your boyfriend before getting into bed]

#11 Be demanding. Men love a woman in charge. Get up and tell him you’re going to have him tonight no matter what, so he better get in the bedroom before you find a way to put him there. If you’re not someone who typically takes charge, he will be both surprised and intrigued.

This will make him start thinking about you telling him what to do in the bedroom and it will force his curiosity to see what you have in store for him.

#12 Turn off the distractions. Men are distracted quite easily. That might be a little mean, but it’s true. If there’s a game on, or his favorite show is playing, or there is anything that could be taking his attention away from you, he’s not going to be in the mood to leave it just to appease you.

Turn it off. Turn the game off, take his phone and put it elsewhere, and climb right on his lap and demand that he pays attention to you only. This is a surefire way to arouse your man even if he isn’t in the mood. [Read: 10 fun sex games you can play with your man to get him horny in no time]

When your man just isn’t feeling like jumping into bed with you, it can be more than a little frustrating. If you’re in dire need of him in the bedroom, then the 12 sexy suggestions above will be sure to arouse him, even if he isn’t in the mood.

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Bella Pope LovePanky
Annabel Rodgers
Annabel is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog,...