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Perfect Tease: How to Keep a Guy Interested after Sleeping with Him

You started having sex with a guy, but now you’re wondering how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him. Here is everything you need to know.

how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him

Wondering how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him? Well, who hasn’t wondered this before?! Honestly, many people sleep with someone on a first date. This isn’t something new. Most of the time, it was because the chemistry wasn’t bad, and we needed to scratch an itch.

But there are some cases where you wouldn’t mind seeing him again and again and again. You get where we’re going with this. But the big question is: how do you get him to stay interested in you after you gave him the goods?

We don’t want to go all out and say that all men are driven purely by sex, but when it comes to casual encounters, this is a big reason.

[Read: What do guys think of a girl after the very first time they sleep with her?]

How to keep a guy interested in you after sleeping with him over text

So, you did the deed with him. Now what? How should you act? What about communication afterward? Should you text him or not?

Well, the best thing to do is to let him take the lead. That’s just the natural order of things – men tend to be the pursuer in a relationship, while women tend to be the pursuee. It’s worked that way for thousands of years, so why mess with human nature?

So, whatever you do, don’t text him first. Men want what they can’t have, so you want to be calm and cool, not needy and clingy. [Read: How to make your hookup miss you – The pros, cons and all the ways to hook him hard and deep]

How to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him 

There were times when, after hooking up with a guy, girls realize that they like him and think that maybe they could try going on a real date. You know, one that doesn’t end up in the bedroom. Now, this isn’t to say it’s impossible, it is possible, but it’s going to take some work.

Since you already slept with him, it’s going to be a challenge, but then again, if he’s not into you after you had sex with him, then he isn’t someone you need to be chasing after.

Okay, you’re here, so it’s about time we showed you some guidelines to follow when it comes to keeping him interested in you. Time to get him chasing you for more. [Read: 33 sexy ways to seduce a man who’s not yet yours and make him desire you]

1. Don’t start acting needy

This happens with both men and women when we’re into someone, we text them eagerly. You just had sex with him so you already went to an intimate place with him.

In his eyes, when you text him an hour later or every morning after, he’s thinking you’re wanting more. As we stated above, men want to be in charge. And believe it or not, they don’t like needy women.

If you want to know how to keep a guy interested after having sex with him, you should know that men are most attracted to confident women. And if you have good self-esteem as a woman, you don’t have any desire to be needy. In fact, you despise it because it’s a behavior that makes you look desperate. And that’s the last thing you want to come across as after sleeping with a guy for the first time.

You can want more from him, but don’t scare him away. Don’t be too eager. Let him text you after you hook up with him. [Read: Are you being ignored after having sex with him? The truth about being ghosted after sex]

2. Don’t expect too much

Yes, you just had sex with him, but this doesn’t mean he’s going to ask you to be his wife. Keep those expectations low, girl. You may be thinking that the sex was special. It may have been special for you but that doesn’t mean he’s going to see it the same way as you do.

You have to realize that men’s and women’s minds work very differently.

Women bond through sex and get attached. Men don’t. For them, sex is just sex. It’s not an act of love or commitment. Not that it can’t be, but it definitely isn’t on a first date. So, if you have no expectations, then you can’t be disappointed. [Read: How men fall in love – The 7 stages they go through when they like a girl]

3. Let him know you liked the sex

When you sleep with someone new, you obviously have a lot of thoughts going on in your mind. You want to know if they liked it if you pleased them. It’s normal. Though many men act like they’re tough, they’re not. [Read: How to tell a guy you want to have sex without feeling slutty]

Most of them have fragile egos and are worrying about the same things as you are. Let him know how you felt sleeping with him, give him a little ego boost.

However, you need to be careful with this one. You run the risk of sounding like you are needy or chasing him if you bring it up first. So, maybe let him take the lead on this one too. You don’t want to seem too over-the-top or overeager when you tell him what a great lover he is. [Read: 34 passionate signs he’s making love to you and not just having sex]

4. Ease off the pressure

If you really want to keep him around and learn how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him, don’t pressure him. Now, if you’ve been sleeping together for a year and nothing is happening, then you can ask questions. 

But if it’s been two days since you slept together, do not start pressuring him with the definition of the relationship. Take it easy or else he’s going to run. 

Guys like to take their time when it comes to relationships. Women tend to want to rush in and define things right away. So, just take it easy and see where it leads.

It’s definitely better for him to bring up a conversation and put “pressure” on you because he likes you so much. [Read: 21 big signs he wants you bad and is irresistibly attracted to you]

5. Let him chase you

Ladies, we know you may like him but don’t chase a guy after having sex with him if you want to keep him interested. The worst thing you can do is chase a guy!

Men are hunters, if you’re not giving him something to chase after, he’ll find something else. 

Make him work for it. It’s okay to ignore him from time to time or play a little game of hot and cold. You don’t have to be an asshole, but let him know he needs to work for it. 

When you let him chase you, it sends him the message that you are a confident woman. You have your own life, friends, job, and other great things going on in your life. In fact, you’re so happy that you don’t really care either way whether he’s a part of it.

That’s the kind of message that guys really respond to. [Read: Why men love a chase and how to use it in your favor]

6. Talk with him

Yes, you slept together, but there are more things you have in common than just that. If you took some time to actually speak to him, you’ll notice some things in common. This is good because you need to connect with him if you want to keep him around.

Long-term relationships need to be based on compatibility. You might feel like you are on the same page sexually, but what about personality differences? This will take a while to figure out. So, keep in mind that talking to him is the only way you’ll find that out.

7. Look good

Not for him though. You need to look good for yourself. That way, you’ll feel confident around him. By doing that, you’ll show him that even though you may be interested in him, you’re not goo-goo-eyed over him. 

Other men will look at you, and he’ll notice that he’s not the only one that has eyes on you. That breeds a sense of competition, and we all know guys like to one-up each other. It’s the “leader of the pack” wolf mentality. [Read: What turns guys on? 34 subtle sexual turn ons that arouse all men in seconds]

8. He needs to contact you

If you really want to know how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him, he needs to be the one who contacts you. He needs to be the one who makes the first move. That way, you have him chasing after you instead of the other way around.

Remember what we said, don’t be the one who chases.

We understand that this might be difficult to do. When you like someone, it’s a natural urge to try to contact them. But if you want to hook this guy, you really need to resist. If he’s interested, you’ll definitely hear from him. If he’s not, you won’t.

9. Be mysterious

No, you don’t need to wear a cloak and talk in old English. But don’t be an open book with him. Sure, you can reply to his texts, but don’t open yourself up too much.

Instead, give him the same amount of information that he gives you. Mirror his behaviors. [Read: How to be mysterious and leave everyone smitten and craving for more]

When you give up too much information too quickly, there’s nothing left for him to discover. So, make sure you keep some of the moves close to your chest. That’s it, nothing more, nothing less.

10. Spend time with him after sex

If you had sex with him and are planning on having sex with him again, spend time with him. After having sex, hang out with him, cuddle, watch a movie, talk. 

Keeping a guy interested after having sex with him is all about spending time together, but focusing on things beyond the bed.

The more time you spend together, he’ll be able to get to know you and vice versa. If you just have sex and leave right away, that’s all it will ever be. [Read: Learn the secrets to cuddling with a guy and making him fall for you]

11. Focus on his brain

There’s more to a relationship than sex. If you already had sex with him and he enjoyed it, then you’re in the clear. Now, work on keeping him mentally stimulated. In other words, f*ck his mind. You’re not just a sexual object, you’re a person with a sense of humor, intelligence, and charisma. Use it.

Get a book of deep questions or scour the internet for mind-blowing things to talk about. It could be anything from aliens to ancient Egypt.

But regardless of the topic, you have to be mentally and intellectually attractive to him in order for a guy to stay interested after sleeping with you and continue dating you – not just physically. [Read: 25 deep questions to ask a guy and turn any guy into an open book]

12. Keep your independence

Men get scared easily, like really easily. They don’t want to feel that they’re being pushed into a corner. Which means you need to focus on keeping your independence.

Go out with your friends, stay busy at work, read books, and just have fun in life. That way, when you talk to him, he will realize that you have a very full life whether he’s a part of it or not. 

Let him see that you don’t need him in order to live your life. That way, he won’t freak out thinking you’re trying to tie him down. You have to let him know you want him, not that you need him. There’s a big difference. [Read: How to be a strong independent woman that all men love and desire]

13. Be a tease

Come on, girl, we know you have it in you. If you’re wondering how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him, remember that it’s not all about sex, it’s about seduction. He can have sex with any girl, but can every girl seduce him? No. 

That’s where you come in. Flirt with him, tease him, talk dirty with him. Keep him stimulated and excited for more. His mind needs to be thinking of you all day long. [Read: How to make him miss you – 20 subtle moves to leave any guy obsessed]

14. Be yourself

This may sound lame, but while you’re doing all of these things, you need to be yourself. He’s not going to fall for you if you’re acting like someone you’re not. 

Don’t change yourself during this process. Let him see you for who you are, then he can decide if he likes it or not. If not, find a new guy. 

Think about it. You can’t keep up an act for very long. You will eventually “turn back into” yourself. So, he needs to fall in love with the real you, not a fictional version. [Read: How to unfake your life and be yourself]

15. Just go with the flow

This probably isn’t going to be the last guy you’re going to have sex with or think that you’re really into. So, just go with the flow. 

If he’s not interested in you and it’s clear, move on. There’s no point chasing after someone that isn’t meeting you halfway. In fact, why would you want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? You shouldn’t.

And if he rejects you, don’t take it personally. Most relationships don’t work out long-term, and there are plenty of other fish in the sea!

[Read: 25 subtle relationship turn offs that provoke and push a guy away]

Now that you know how to keep a guy interested after sleeping with him, you’ll be able to use these tips to have him coming back for more. Just remember, make him chase you and desire you, everything starts from there!

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Carol Morgan LP
Dr. Carol Morgan
Dr. Carol Morgan has a Ph.D. in communication and is a professor at Wright State University where she loves corrupting young minds. As a relationship and succes...