33 Hot Ways to Sext a Guy & 48 Naughty Examples to Make Him Hot & Hard

how to sext a guy - sexting tips

Want to turn up the heat over text? Learn how to sext a guy with confidence, spice, and safety, plus naughty examples that’ll leave him wanting more.

Sexting a guy can feel like walking a tightrope, one wrong move and you’re spiraling into cringe territory. But done right? He’ll be squirming in the best way possible.

If you’re wondering how to sext a guy without sounding awkward or over-the-top, you’re not alone. The key is in knowing how to start, building tension, and learning how to turn him on with just your words (or, you know, a strategically placed emoji).

Sexting isn’t just about turning him on, it’s about teasing, flirting, and deepening your bond, even when you’re miles apart. Studies show that sexual communication via texting can increase relationship satisfaction and intimacy, especially among younger couples.

📚 Source: Silke Van Dijck, et al., 2025, The bright side of sexting

Here’s how to start sexting a guy in 5 quick moves

  1. Start with a flirty tease: “I wish you were here right now…”
  2. Build suspense: “Guess what I’m not wearing?”
  3. Make it playful: Add emojis or song references for mood
  4. Be bold but not graphic right away: Let the tension build
  5. Gauge his response and keep going, if he’s into it, you’ll know.

What is sexting and why do guys love it so much?

If you’re new to the whole sexting thing and googled “how to sext a guy,” don’t worry, you’re not late to the party, you just haven’t been invited into the spicy group chat yet.

Sexting is sending sexually suggestive or explicit messages to someone you’re into, whether it’s your boyfriend, a sneaky link, or a flirt situation that’s heating up fast.

It can be just a few cheeky texts, or a full-blown, steamy exchange that leaves you both breathing heavy behind your screens.

And no, sexting doesn’t have to lead to sex in real life. But let’s be honest, if there’s chemistry and trust, it often does.

📚 Source: Is sexting good for you?, Drouin et al., 2017

Start here for a complete guide

Want a complete step-by-step guide on sexting, dirty talk, and the best secrets to arouse a guy and leave hium throbbing for more? Start with these guides:

How to tell if a guy wants to sext you

Ever had that moment where you’re flirting over text, and you’re this close to sending something spicy… but you hesitate? You’re not sure if he’s just being playful, or if he’s secretly hoping you’ll take it to a whole new level.

Here’s how to tell if a guy is totally down for a sext session.

1. He drops subtle double meanings

If he’s saying things like, “Wish I could see you right now” or “What are you wearing?”, he’s probably hoping you’ll pick up on the vibe and escalate.

2. He responds very quickly

If you send a slightly suggestive message and he texts back like he’s been possessed by his hormones? Yeah. He’s into it. [Read: 25 Sexy Text Messages to Initiate a Dirty Conversation with Anyone]

3. He sends flirty or suggestive emojis

🍑💦😈… If his emoji game includes any of these, he’s trying to hint without spelling it out. Take that as an open door.

4. He brings up memories of intimate moments

Does he text, “I can’t stop thinking about last night” or “Remember what we did in the car?”? That’s basically him saying: Please sext me.

5. He asks for your pics or fantasies

A guy who’s into sexting might directly say, “Send me a pic” or “Tell me what you’re thinking about.” If he gives you the green light, take the wheel.

📚 Source: Peter Karl -PK- Jonason, et al., 2015, An Examination of the Nature of Erotic Talk

[Read: 74 Sexy & Dirty Things to Say to Your Boyfriend + Art of Dirty Talk Over Text]

How to sext a guy you like

So how do you actually begin? It’s likely that he has made some kind of suggestive remark in a text message that has got you thinking about sexting. If he hasn’t, it’s totally fine for you to make the first move. [Read: 16 tips you shouldn’t ignore if you want to be a good sexter]

1. Start slowly and feel the waters

When you first start sexting your guy, take it slowly and proceed from there. If he has sent you a text message that is a little suggestive, reply with a winking face emoji and a suggestive comment, e.g. ‘I wish you were here now, we’d have so much fun 😉’

There are no right or wrong words to use, and there are no right or wrong things to say either. It’s what feels good to you both.

2. Remember it’s meant to be fun

Sexting is not meant to be ultra-serious, and you are not supposed to be some text-based adult movie star either! Keep it fun, because if it’s not fun, it’s not worth doing. Sexting isn’t always about the actual act of sex, it’s also about having a laugh, staying connected when you’re not together, and deepening your bond.

The more you do it, the more confident you’ll feel, and you’ll come up with more things to say off the bat. [Read: How to turn your boyfriend on while texting him – 21 powerful tips]

3. Think about what you’d like to hear

When figuring out how to sext a guy, thinking about what you’d like to hear is often the easiest way to come up with a few useful messages. From there, just let it flow.

4. Be as descriptive as possible

Sexting is basically dirty talk via a text message. That’s really what it boils down to. Just use words that evoke a response in that way because it automatically paints a picture in their mind.

5. If it really makes you feel uncomfortable, just stop

If it truly does feel awkward, cringey, and downright uncomfortable, just stop. In this case, sexting does not need to be a part of your repertoire. Perhaps the more in-person route is for you instead. [Read: 76 Sexy Texts to Send Your Boyfriend & Tricks to Get Him Hard Imagining You]

6. You don’t have to send pictures, but if you do, keep your face out of them

If you’re going to be sending naughty pictures, be careful. Even if you follow all precautionary measures, you could still end up finding your naked selfie all over the internet.

So in order to protect yourself, just crop your face out of the naughty pics. This really doesn’t change anything when it gets sent to your man. He’ll enjoy it all the same, but you reduce the risk of people knowing who it is in the naughty photo. [Read: Warning! How to be careful while sending dirty snapchats]

7. Don’t sext when you’ve been drinking

This should be the golden rule. We all need to remove our phones from our grasps when we’ve been drinking because we can do some serious damage without even remembering it sometimes.

Sexting is OFF LIMITS when you’ve been drinking. Sure, it may help calm your nerves so you can get that sext out, but if you’re not comfortable enough to sext the person sober, then you shouldn’t be doing it at all.

8. Delete photos after sending them

Right after you’ve hit that “send” button and the photo is delivered to your special man, go into your photos and delete it. And for you iPhone users out there, you’ll have to go into your “recently deleted” folder and delete it for a second time.

This ensures that if you ever need to go back through your photos to show someone something, there’s no risk of them seeing all your lady bits because you didn’t delete that naughty selfie. A hugely important tip for how to sext a guy. [Read: How to send sexy nude selfies and not get into trouble]

9. Make them do the talking

This is a really great technique for you to be able to sext safely, and it’s also really great for newbie sexters, too. To do this, you just send them a very simple phrase like, “I wish you were here ;)”, followed by a question when they reply.

This works best when you use open-ended questions that are suggestive. Something like, “What do you miss most about me ;)” will give him the hint to get talking dirty.

This way, you’re not the one sending all the dirty details… he is. But it’s still sexting. [Read: 25 sexy text messages to start a sexy, naughty conversation]

10. Only do it on your personal devices

An important point when learning how to sext a guy is to never, ever, ever sext when you’re at work and on the company email. And never use a public computer or device to do so, either.

It’s far too easy for people to access, and you do not want that embarrassment on your hands.

11. Work up to the sexting

If you just dive right in to the sexting world, you’ll be awkward, lost, and you’ll probably not be very safe. The best thing to do to avoid this is to work up to sexting instead of just going for it right away.

When learning how to sext a guy, send small, seemingly innocent sexts, and make your sessions really short at first. This will also help you gauge how he reacts and how safe you really need to be with the messages and photos you send. [Read: 80 Flirty Texts, Questions & Naughty Must-Knows to Flirt with a Guy Over Text]

12. Only sext after being intimate in person

This is the best advice we can really offer you because you should never be talking the talk when you haven’t yet walked the walk.

Don’t sext someone you haven’t actually been physically intimate with. Firstly, you don’t know what would be effective to get them all hot for you in the first place, and secondly, the trust hasn’t been built that far yet. Who knows how they could misuse the things you say or the images you share?

13. If you don’t like the sext, don’t send it

If you’re feeling really uncomfortable about a certain sext and you just don’t want to send it, then don’t. There’s not a rule about how to sext a guy saying you HAVE to send everything you type up.

If you don’t think you should send it, or if it’s just a little too personal for your taste, just delete it and start completely over. [Read: 85 Sexting Tips & Examples to Talk Dirty Over Text With a Guy & Get Him Hard]

14. Read back over your sexts before hitting ‘send’

This should be an obvious tip for how to sext a guy, yet you see so many damn sexts online that were turned into something… not sexy at all. And that’s all because someone didn’t read through their message before sending it.

In order to make a sext effective, you have to proofread it. You can’t just send a mistake and expect them to stay in the mood, especially if they have no idea what you even mean! [Read: 147 Dirty Phrases & Sexy Texts For Him to Turn a Guy On & Leave Him Horny AF]

15. Make sure you trust who you’re sexting

This is by far the most important rule to follow when learning how to sext a guy. You can never send a sext and have it be safe in another person’s hands if you don’t trust them yourself. You have to know that this person isn’t going to show others or laugh at your attempts.

Trusting whoever you’re sending naughty pictures to is a must if you want to sext effectively as well. Being comfortable is what makes sexts meaningful, and that comfort has to be built on trust. [Read: How to build trust in a relationship and make it last]

16. Use the right words

It’s no good beating around the bush here, if you’re going to learn how to sext a guy, you need to know the words to use. That means not using obscure words and trying to sugarcoat what you want to say.

If you want to tell him that you can’t wait to touch his dick, go ahead and say it! Don’t come up with an innocent word for the part of his body you want to touch – be direct! [Read: Emoji Sexting: 30 Fun Emojis to Make Any Text Seem Extra Flirty & Naughty!]

17. Leave a little to the imagination 

Sexting is basically teasing. While we’ve talked about being direct, you still need to hold back just a little. You could say something like, “I can’t wait to see you later, I’ve got some fun in store” and then he’s sure to ask you what that fun is.

You can then tease him with little snapshots, rather than giving him the full story.

18. You can use voice notes too

Add in a few breathy voice notes to your regular messaging routine, and you’ll have him begging for more! Tell him that you’re touching yourself and thinking about him, and then send him a few seconds’ worth of you moaning for him.

He’ll be desperate to get his hands on you! [Read: How to moan and look and sound sexy AF when you do it]

19. Do it for you and not for him

First of all, you do it not to please him but to pleasure your little self. Doing so will make it more natural and less awkward, therefore upping up the ante on the titillation factor. This will also make the experience more fun for you.

The more fun you have, the more sex appeal you will channel through your sexts. [Read: 20 sexy questions to sext a guy and seduce him discreetly]

20. Building up tension is important

What’s exciting about sexting is the sexual tension built up over time. Coming on too strong or too fast may throw your guy off, especially if you have just met. Don’t escalate from a simple hello to, “I’m totally touching myself while thinking of you.”

Start out with a simple text, and get flirtier and flirtier as you progress. Build up the anticipation by making your texts naughtier and naughtier, until your man can’t wait to actually do the deed with you. [Read: Sexy, naughty sexting games to leave you both horny all night long]

21. Use your imagination, but not too much!

Saying that you’re going to tie him up to a pole and whip the bejeezus out of him isn’t something that will turn him on, especially because he knows it’s ridiculously untrue *unless it’s true!*. In fact, it may even freak him out a little.

Always text something that you really plan on doing, so there is follow through. Be imaginative, but don’t make it an utter fantasy or an empty promise. However, if you’re playing the fantasy card and he totally gets the role-play, then text away. [Read: 110+ sexy, dirty questions to ask a guy and seduce him in no time]

22. Know when to ease off

It’s important to know when to hit the breaks when naughty takes a turn toward being nasty. If he’s sexting you about threesomes or something that is really not your cup of tea, you can either steer the conversation to something else, or you can be vocal, and let him know that you’re not into certain things.

Being in the heat of the moment doesn’t mean you have to play along with something that you’re really not comfortable with. After all, you should be having fun too.

23. Be open to real text conversations too

If your man texts you that he had a rough day at work, don’t respond by saying, “Oooh, I’m so horny honey.” Show that you are responsive not only when he’s being kinky and frisky, but that you’re also there for him when he’s down or if he just needs someone to talk to.

Don’t substitute sexting in place of having real conversations or getting to know him even better. Use sexting only as a tool to add spice to the relationship, and not as your sole form of connecting with him. [Read: The sexy conversation starters to get you both horny]

How to sext a guy: 48 sexting examples to arouse him in minutes

Now you know how to sext a guy, you might need a little inspiration to get you started. Try one or two of these examples, and then let your mind run wild!

1. You going to be alone tonight? Want to play a game? [Read: Sexy, naughty texting games to have fun all night long]

2. I bet you’d be amazing in bed

3. I can give you a hand, if you want 

4. I’m about to get in bed, want to join?

5. I’m imagining you’re with me right now… 

6. Thinking about kissing you… everywhere

7. I’ve been wondering lately… about what you’d do to me

8. Be honest… have you ever fantasized about me? 

9. I think I want you 

10. I don’t know why, but all I want is sex right now

11. I need you here. Now.

12. I keep touching myself [Read: 40 naughty sexts to keep things hot and horny]

13. Can I have my way with you?

14. I want to serve you

15. I am so into you, I want to be in you right now

16. I feel wasted just by looking at your pictures

17. If you could do anything you wanted to me, what would you do? [Read: 60 sexy and dirty things to say to your boyfriend + the art of dirty talk]

18. I don’t know what you did to me last night, but…

19. My _______ gets super ________ when I think about you 

20. You’re a dirty boy/girl, aren’t you?

21. I’m going to wait until you’re begging for more…

22. Promise not to stop? 

23. Could you go nice and hard on me? [Read: 23 sexy tips to talk dirty and say the sexiest words]

24 I want you to go deep inside, hard!

25. I want you to pull my ________, and force my ________ on your ________

26. I’m going to hold your hands down and….

27. Are you going to _______ for me, baby? [Read: 36 racy, random questions for flirty guys and girls]

28. I’m going to _______ you so good tonight

29. Mmm, I want to taste myself on your ______ [Read: 20 dirty questions to text a girl and make her wet]

30. I had a dream about you last night. 

31. What are you wearing? [Read: 40 flirty questions to ask a guy and leave him thinking of you]

32. What are you doing right now? 

33. If I were with you right now, what would you want to do to me? [Read: 20 sexiest texts to send a guy and seduce him]

34. Sucking on a lollipop and thinking of you. 

35. Lying in bed and bored, want to come over and change that? 

36. I’m horny right now. 

37. Listening to this *insert song with dirty lyrics* and it’s making me think of you. 

38. What you did to me last night is making me wet just remembering it.

39. I am touching myself and thinking of you. [Read: 35 texts to make him hard and crave your touch]

40. Just out of the shower. 

41. Have I told you how sexy I find you? 

42. I have a surprise for you later. [Read: The sexiest ways to talk dirty over text and turn a guy on]

43. You. Me. Naked. Tonight.  

44. Good morning. I am not wearing any panties today. Just thought you should know. [Read: 20 reasons a good morning text is so important]

45. I want to act out your wildest fantasy. Just tell me what it is. 

46. Let’s call in sick and stay in bed all day.

47. Bring whipped cream. [Read: How to talk dirty to a guy and sound really sexy]

48. You’re so sexy it takes my breath away. 

New Tech-Savvy Ways to Sext a Guy

Let’s be real, sexting isn’t limited to texting anymore. These days, people are getting creative with how they turn up the heat.

If you’re ready to level-up your sexy game, here are the most popular ways people are sexting right now, and how to do it right.

1. Voice notes are the new dirty talk

Want to drive him crazy? Whisper into your phone and send a breathy little voice note. Say his name slowly, describe what you’re doing, or let out a soft moan. It’s intimate, raw, and totally addictive.

Bonus tip: Use AirPods or headphones to record so your voice comes through clear and extra sensual.

2. Snapchat or Instagram Close Friends

These platforms are made for teasing. A suggestive selfie on IG’s Close Friends story or a disappearing snap with just the right angle? Perfect! Plus, the disappearing feature gives you a little extra peace of mind.

Just make sure you trust him, and don’t include your face in the shot.

[Read: Snapchat Sexting: How to Own Your Lover With the Snap of a Camera]

3. Use apps with vanish mode or disappearing chats

Instagram DMs now have a “vanish mode,” and WhatsApp has disappearing messages too. Perfect for a little after-dark flirty fun without leaving a permanent paper trail.

📚 Source: Michel Walrave, et al., 2018, Social Media and Privacy in Sexting Behaviour

4. Send sexy song lyrics or TikTok audio

Text him a suggestive lyric from a steamy R&B song. Or better yet, use TikTok’s audio messages to say something spicy over a trending sound. It’s modern foreplay with a side of creative flair.

5. Use private folders for saved spicy content

Some couples like to keep a little “vault” of shared content on apps like Telegram or even in a locked note on their phones. If you’re deep into sexting with someone you trust, this can be a fun way to keep the heat on low simmer, ready when you both are.

Sexting is evolving fast, and it’s no longer just about clever wordplay. Explore different platforms, keep it safe and fun, and most importantly, stay in control of your comfort.

[Read: The Best Dirty, Sexy Texting Games to Get Naughty With One Text!]

Stop feeling awkward and embrace the fun to start sexting a guy!

The one thing holding most women back when it comes to learning how to start sexting a guy is embarrassment. Perhaps not knowing the right words to say, the risk of sounding weird, or that he’s going to laugh.

You want to know the truth? He’s not going to laugh.

He’s going to be so over the moon that you’re talking in a suggestive or even dirty way that he’s simply thrilled about the whole thing. To be honest, he’s got his hand down his pants and he’s not laughing, that’s for sure.

The single best way to begin is to embrace the whole thing as a lot of fun. He’s going to be saying things to you, you reply, he’ll say something else, and you might giggle a little, but it will make you smile. That’s the whole point! If you end up getting off on it, well, that’s a very pleasant side effect indeed!

How to sext a guy and leave him craving more

The truth is, learning how to sext a guy isn’t about being a wordsmith or a sex goddess. It’s about trust, confidence, and a willingness to play. You’re not auditioning for an erotic novel, you’re letting someone special in on your desires.

If your hands shake the first time you type something spicy? That’s okay. According to research, sexual expression and anticipation, even over text, can deepen emotional intimacy and boost desire over time.

📚 Source: Sexting and Sexual Satisfaction on Young Adults, Imelda Oriza et al., 2020

[Read: 34 passionate signs he’s making love to you and not just having sex]

Learning how to sext a guy is not difficult. A mere suggestion is all you need, and you can build from there. The more confident you become, the more fun your sexting sessions will be!