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20 Ways to Make Your Man Realize Your Worth in the Relationship & Value You

If your man makes you feel bad about yourself, then it’s time to learn how to make him realize your worth. Show him that you’re a high-quality woman!

How to Make Him Realize Your Worth

If you are with a high-quality partner, you will never have to wonder how to make him realize your worth. So, if your relationship has you in a place asking how to make your boyfriend realize your importance, then he isn’t the person for you. 

Of course, you probably don’t want to dump him right now. It’s hard, and you probably don’t want to lose him. 

And you probably have moments where you’re insecure and think, “he’s not respecting or appreciating me.” But at the same time, you might be stubborn when your friends and family pressure you to break up with him.

So, you’ll stay with him for a while until you realize it’s enough. And this might be because you think that you’ll never be able to find anyone else after him. Which, you should know, is complete crap.

It’s amazing how our insecurities will keep us in situations that we know aren’t right. But everyone needs their own time to come to terms with these things.

Who knew love would be so hard?

So, if you’re not ready to break up with him, in the meantime, try out these different ways to make your boyfriend realize your importance. 

And you know, maybe he will open his eyes and realize the mistakes he made. But if not, don’t wait around for the lightbulb to switch in his head. [Read: Hints to make a guy realize he’s losing you]

How to make him realize your worth and take notice of how awesome you are

If your partner always needs reminding of your worth, then why are you with this guy? 

He should be grateful that he has such a wonderful person in his life. You shouldn’t have to convince him to see it.

But if you simply want to learn how to make him realize your worth, there are plenty of high-quality ways you can do just that. Here are some things you can do. [Read: How to stick up for yourself in a relationship and know your worth!]

1. Realize your own worth first

First things first, you can’t go around proving your worth to someone if you’re not aware of it yourself. 

This is really the problem when it comes to knowing how to make your boyfriend realize your worth. You don’t respect yourself or see your worth. If you did, you would never let someone treat you like this.

Love yourself, let negative things go, focus on the positives, and learn to love yourself. [Read: How to love yourself – your journey to self-love and happiness]

Believe it or not, everything will change when you do that. You’ll notice that you walk a little taller, everything feels better, and you have a far rosier outlook as a result.

You deserve love, respect, and kindness from your partner. If your boyfriend isn’t giving this to you, then you’re clearly not giving this to yourself either.

2. Take a step back

A great way to learn how to make him realize your worth is to simply take a step back. Cool things down a bit. [Read: How to bounce back when you feel worthless]

Be aloof and don’t make him your number-one focus. He’ll start to wonder what happened and this will help him change his focus.

Of course, it’s not ideal that you need to do this, but perhaps he’s just become distracted by what is going on in his life and needs a quick reminder of what he has in front of him. Taking a step back will certainly do that.

3. Try a little radio silence

If you’re always the one who texts first or calls first, it’s time to stop. You can certainly reply if he messages or calls you, but leave it a little while before you answer. Also, don’t jump as soon as the phone rings. [Read: How to fix a one-sided relationship before it ends in failure]

Sometimes you need to go slightly silent for a while to make someone realize your absence and question what’s going on. It’s certainly one of the ways to learn how to make him realize your worth.

4. Keep yourself occupied

If your partner doesn’t show you the attention you deserve, then turn the focus away from him and back onto you. Keep yourself busy and occupied, and you’ll find it far easier to do.

You’ll also find that you pick up new hobbies and perhaps make new friends, enhancing your social life and overall enjoyment. Ironically, all of this will make you irresistible in his eyes. [Read: 15 fun, random questions to ask friends and the best things to talk about]

5. Stop trying to tell him and start showing him his behavior is unacceptable

Sometimes words don’t work, and you have to show someone how upset you are through what you do. Actions certainly speak louder than words!

Not answering his texts or calls straightway is one option, but make sure that everything you do shows that you’re not impressed with being made to feel less than important.

6. Learn to say no

In addition to showing him that his behavior is unacceptable, you also need to learn to tell him “no.” [Read: How to make a guy worry about losing you – 15 hints that really work]

Sure, you want to be the cool girlfriend. Well sorry, but sometimes you’re going to have to be the bad guy. Women are always saying yes to things even when they don’t want to. 

In fact, you probably say “yes” a lot more than you say “no,” and that has a habit of making him think that he doesn’t have to try very hard. It’s time to make him try harder!

You don’t need to say yes to everything he suggests. Learn to say no. He needs to hear no. [Read: How to say no, stop people pleasing, and feel awesome instead]

Understanding how to make him realize your worth relies upon him working a bit for your attention, and you can do that by saying “no” a little more. If in the past, you just agreed to go out when you didn’t want to, start refusing. 

If in the past you went along with something for an easy life, stop doing it. Start pleasing yourself!

7. Assert your independence

In relationships, we sometimes bend over backward to make our partners happy without realizing that it’s backfiring. When you do everything for someone, they start to take it for granted. [Read: How to pull back in a relationship when you’re giving too much]

He needs to see that you have a life outside of him. It’s healthy to spend time apart from each other, seeing friends and family. So, don’t hesitate to go out with your girls on a Friday night to a bar. 

Use your fiery independence and stop being a doormat. Do what you want for a change, don’t explain why, and stop being a pushover! 

He’ll probably find this newly asserted sassy side very attractive. It’s definitely how to make him realize your worth, and that you are pleasing yourself at the same time. [Read: How to give space in a relationship and not drift apart]

If you feel he’s treating you as someone less important, going out is crucial for him to realize you don’t need him.

8. Focus on you and what you enjoy

It’s time to be selfish. If he can’t willingly see your worth, then simply find it yourself and take the time to enjoy it. Or if you love to sit at home and read, go for it. 

If you enjoy the gym, go a little more. Maybe you’re a big coffee shop fan, head there more often. [Read: Feeling used by a guy? How to read the signs and do the right thing]

Stop putting your own interests aside for someone who isn’t showing you how wonderful you are every day. By doing that, you’re learning how to make him realize your worth. 

You also might find that you enjoy yourself so much that you’re not interested in bending over backward for him anymore!

9. Reconnect with friends

It’s unfortunately pretty common for friendships to be placed on the back burner when a new relationship starts. The longer time goes on, the more damage is done.

It’s time to reconnect with those friends and make sure that this time, you don’t make the same mistake twice. [Read: How to reconnect with old friends and rebuild your lost friendships]

Talk things through with your friends, make plans, go out, have fun, and remember just how wonderful it is to have close friends in your life. 

Of course, it doesn’t hurt if you show this on social media at the same time, because he’ll see just how much fun you’re having!

10. Don’t be passive aggressive

It’s hard to confront someone on a topic like this. It takes a lot of courage, but it’s something you need to do. Do not act passive-aggressively, trying to drop subtle hints. [Read: How to stop being passive-aggressive – get out of the toxic state]

Obviously, he’s not getting it. Just be open and honest with him. You can’t beat around the bush when it comes to your feelings.

11. Talk to him about this

The only way you can make progress is if you talk to him about how you’re feeling. You’re not just someone who keeps him warm at night, you’re a human being. 

So, you have to communicate. Express to him how you’re feeling and be specific. It’s the only way he’ll see what you’re going through. [Read: Steps to take to tell your partner you’re unhappy]

12. Don’t only focus on the negative

When you’re talking to him, you’re going to be mentioning a lot of negative things – which is normal. You’re feeling lonely and disrespected. 

But also mention that you want the relationship to work, this is why you’re talking to him. If you want to know how to make your boyfriend realize your importance, show him that you’re willing to work on things if he meets you halfway.

13. Show him your trust

Men can pull away if they don’t feel they’re trusted in a relationship. Maybe he knows some of his actions aren’t right, but he’s worried bringing it up will start a fight. [Read: How to help someone with trust issues open up and overcome their fear]

You need to show him you trust him. Talking to him about your feelings is a sign for him that you trust him.

14. Make time for each other

Spend more alone time together. If you live together, he may have just gotten too comfortable and stopped putting effort into some things. 

But this is the moment where you both step it up. Agree on a day of the week when it’s date night, and do something together. [Read: Romantic dinner date ideas – 17 fun dates you both will never forget]

15. Pull back on doing everything

Another great way to get him to realize your worth is to stop doing everything for him. One reason many women feel like this is that they take on most of the chores. If you’re always cooking, cleaning, and doing his laundry, what is there left for him to do? 

You need to pull back on the things you always do for him. It’s time for him to do some work.

16. Speak up when you’re not pleased

Many women will bite their tongues and stay silent on issues that really bother them. But this isn’t something you should be doing. If you’re not happy with something he did, then you need to speak up. [Read: How to know if your partner is truly supportive of you]

Otherwise, he’ll never learn how you feel, and he won’t change his behavior. Yes, choose your battles, but don’t become a doormat.

17. Put yourself first

You haven’t been doing this, because if you did, you wouldn’t be reading about how to make your boyfriend realize your importance. You need to put yourself first. That’s right. He’s second and you’re number one. 

Spend time practicing self-care and doing things that make you happy. Yes, you’ll need to compromise sometimes, that’s normal. But you should never let yourself take the backseat. [Read: 15 signs of a taker in a relationship – Are you a giver or a taker?]

18. Give him some space

Sometimes when we’re around our partner too much, everything becomes blurry. We stop date nights, get dressed up, and having sex. 

And these are a big part of keeping the flame in a relationship. So, it’s okay to give him some space from time to time. Let him miss you.

19. You make a move in the bedroom

If you’re always waiting for him to make a move, it’s time to change that. This is your relationship as well. [Read: How to initiate sex and 25 seductive ways to take the lead in bed]

If you’re looking to be sexually satisfied, don’t wait around for him to make a move. Take the ball in your hands because he’s not going to argue about this.

20. Quit making excuses

If he screws up, he screws up. There’s no excuse for his behavior. And sure, you have a reason for everything, but you can’t use excuses to mask his poor behavior. 

If he hurt you, he hurt you. Do not tolerate his crappy behavior; he needs to know he screwed up. Or else he’ll never learn. [Read: How to set boundaries in your relationship for a healthy love]

If there’s no change, then leave him

You read this correctly. Listen, if he’s not making any change after you’ve sat down with him a couple of times and expressed how you feel, leave. 

He’s not bringing anything to the relationship or to your life. And you’re going to waste your time on a guy who doesn’t care about you.

It’s not ideal to be talking about how to make him realize your worth, because a guy worth the effort shouldn’t have to be reminded. [Read: The step-by-step guide for how to break up with the guy who doesn’t want to]

However, it could just be a fleeting one-time thing that needs to be righted. If that’s the case, you don’t have anything to worry about.

The issue comes when you have a guy in your life who doesn’t seem to notice how lucky he is. In that case, why should you bother trying to convince him? 

Surely, it’s a better option to look for someone who doesn’t need to be reminded and who pays you the attention you deserve every day. [Read: How to make a guy realize he’s losing you and help him change]

Final thoughts

Remember, you’re never going to be truly happy with someone who doesn’t realize how lucky he is.

Of course, it could be that by trying a few of these steps in figuring out how to make him realize your worth, there’s a chance he changes completely. 

Hopefully – for your sake. In that case, you’ve overcome the issue. However, if he doesn’t, it’s time to wave goodbye and find someone who is truly deserving of your time and attention.

[Read: The clear signs it’s time for you to leave your relationship]

Learning how to make him realize your worth is about focusing on yourself again and learning to take back the effort and time you’ve wasted in the past. You deserve better.

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Carol Morgan LP
Dr. Carol Morgan
Dr. Carol Morgan has a Ph.D. in communication and is a professor at Wright State University where she loves corrupting young minds. As a relationship and succes...