Just because you’re a wife, doesn’t mean you should have lost that “Je ne sais quoi” that had your husband hooked from date number one.
Couples grow together and sometimes that means there’s little left to the imagination, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Women are fabulous whether they have a rock on their finger or not. So why is it that these fabulous, confident, sensual women suddenly feel like old news after they’ve gotten hitched?
8 ways to be stay sexy after getting married
You think that just because you’re in a loving, committed relationship that the sex should become stale, and your conversations routine? Think again. Here’s looking at all the ways you can be a wife and still light the fires of passion in your man.
#1 Embrace the wifely role. So you’re the wife. You’re the soft place for your man to fall after a hard day, the one who makes him fabulous dinners and charms him with fabulous conversations… But you also do the dishes, help pay the bills, and clean his dirty underwear.
Instead of begrudging your wifely role – embrace the fantasy that comes along with it. Are you a stay at home gal? Show him exactly how sexy a wife can be: let him come home to you cooking an amazing meal in nothing but 6″ heels and your most tantalizing lingerie. This is sure to be a wifely-image he’ll never forget. [Read: 30 ways to spice up your married sex life]
#2 Insist on a date night. This might seem like a lame “mom” thing to do, but don’t be fooled: this strategy is great for newlyweds and veteran marriages alike. Life is hectic and between jobs, family, friends and possibly children, there’s sometimes little time to connect with your partner and just “be” together.
Some couples, like having a monthly sex vacation or an exciting event to go to or even a road trip where they can leave it all behind. They’re not your run of the mill go-to-dinner dates, but they’re exciting adventure type dates. [Read: 10 things a sex vacation can do for you]
And remember, while you can toss in a sexy game night as a tantalizing option, date night doesn’t have to always be about sex. Date night is about spending time together as a couple. Instead of worrying about which naughty lingerie to put on for the night, try something a bit more sentimental, like recreating your first romantic date together. [Read: 50 date night ideas married couples should try]
#3 Keep sex interesting. One of the most important ways to remain a sexual goddess to your husband, is to be a sexual goddess. A lifetime of love, understanding, laughter, and comfort that can be found in a marriage is wonderful – but a lifetime of monogamy can be a challenge. Even if your husband was the best sex of your life, 20 years with someone -even 5 years- can start to be a toughie in the bedroom.
You and your partner are used to each other, and you know all the tips and tricks to making the other one come, but after what feels like a lifetime together, it’s usually the sex that starts to become stale.
Be a sexy wife and keep things interesting in the bedroom. Yes, he knows all your dirty secrets and nooks and crannies that must be touched for you to get there – but why not skip the mundane and spice things up. Buy a book of sexual positions and try a new one every day. Take a trip to the sex shop alone and have him come home to a collection of goodies sprawled out across the bed. He’ll appreciate the gesture.
Another way to spice up your sex life is with monthly sex boxes. You know how women can order subscription boxes every month filled with high end makeup samples? Now you can have a monthly sex box delivered just the same way, only instead of makeup goodies, you’ll get lingerie, a sex toy, lotion, lube and deep-throat sample sprays, and naughty games to play. Have a look online and find a box that works for you.
Couples who have sexual subscriptions sent to them monthly have said they feel their partner is less likely to cheat, and that having a fantasy to look forward to each month has livened up both their sex-lives, and their communication.
#4 Role play. Years of being with the same person can sometimes stifle that spark you feel. Role-playing is a great way to not only live out your fantasies, but to be and be with someone new for a night. Role-play you’re on a first date, you’re sexy strangers or that you’re a high-powered businesswoman who’s hot for your hard-ass business rival. Let your imagination run wild! [Read: The sexual role play guide for beginners]
#5 Leave mommy at home. If you are parents and you have situated a weekly date night for yourselves, do yourselves a sexy little favor and leave the kids with the babysitter for that one night each week. No matter what you’re doing: cooking, cuddling, ice-skating, make sure it’s about the two of you – not your kids. Yes, you love them. Yes, you like to talk about them. But you’re on date night. Leave your “mom” stuff at home. [Read: 25 romantic little things to show your husband you care]
#6 Keep the mystery alive. Married rules specify that when you get married, you move in together – and when you move in together, suddenly all of those secret girly behaviors you used to do when you were alone to keep primp and pretty are all out there for your husband to see.
Men like a mystery. It’s what keeps them hooked when they’re trying to get you. One of the best ways to stay a sexy wife, is to stay a sexy mystery. For example, keep your private primping’s… private. If you have hairs suddenly cropping up where there once were none, your fellah certainly doesn’t need to know about it.
#7 Keep taking care of yourself. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you should focus all your caring attention onto your spouse, kids and your home. With married mothers especially, juggling your children, your job and your husband can be quite the balancing act – one that leaves little room for showering.
It’s a fact, mothers spend more time on their children than they do on themselves. While it’s important to get the little ones dressed and ready, don’t forgo taking care of yourself. Keep up with your skin and hair care routines, and don’t be afraid to dress up once in a while and go all out.
Your husband coming home to his sexy wife with her winged liner, teased hair, and her little black dress will have you saying: “Hey hot-stuff, remember me?”
#8 Have your own life. It’s important that as a married couple you spend time together, but as an individual with your own wants and needs, it’s just as important to maintain your social life away from your mate. This creates not only that important feeling of independence, but also conversation topics with your partner. If all you’re doing is spending time together, you won’t have many new things to report on. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be independent. And independence? Very sexy.
[Read: 11 tips for a happily married life]
Your mate fell in love with you for you. Cliché as it is. Just because you’ve become a wife doesn’t mean you should let yourself go. Continue showing your man what a ferocious, sexy kitten you are by asserting your independence, showing him you care, and continuing to rock his world in all areas of life.
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Waverly Smith is a freelance writer who has been getting paid for spreading her sarcastic take on love, life, and sex since 2010. She is many things that peo...
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