When you like a guy, you want to be around him as much as possible. You also want to cut to the chase and find out if he likes you too. That can be hard when mixed signals run riot! For sure, approaching him and trying to have a conversation isn’t the easiest thing, but if you want to date this guy, you have to talk to him! Luckily for you, there are ways you can learn how to ask a guy out in a way that gives you a much greater chance of success. You can also cut down on the cringe factor too!
Of course, you’d rather he asked you out so you don’t have to.
Yet, at times, life can be a tad more complicated than we want it to be. At times like these, a girl has no choice but to make the first move.
[Read: How to ask a guy out over text – 15 moves to get the answer you want]
Now we can’t tell you for sure that he’s going to agree to your date offer, but by doing the groundwork first, you’ll have a much better idea of what he’s going to say.
You can also impress him with your womanly wiles and have him hanging on your every word! That’s sure to give you a much better chance of getting a ‘yes’. [Read: Womanly wiles – How to exude femininity and use it in your favor]
Before you learn how to ask a guy out, you need to warm him up first. You need to show him that you’re utterly amazing *because you are!* so he can’t help but agree to your date request. He might even end up asking you out first!
Laugh, make eye contact, be yourself, tell some jokes, don’t take life too seriously, and basically show him that you’re a fun girl who he’s going to love spending time with. [Read: 20 easy conversation starters you can use to talk to any guy you like]
You’ll hear a million and one pieces of advice about playing hard to get, but in our experience, it always backfires. Rather than trying to make him want you by pretending that you don’t like him, just smile and be yourself and make it clear that you like him back. ;:
That doesn’t have to mean coming right out with it, but by dropping a few useful hints instead. [Read: How to let a guy know you’re interested without being overeager]
Before you attempt to ask him out, you need to find out if he’s single first. It’s going to be a little embarrassing if you go for it and he tells you that he’s already in a relationship.
It’s not hard to find out – check his social media or ask around. You could even drop a few hints like, “I bet your girlfriend likes that shirt” or something similar. It shows you’re interested with mild flirting but it also gives you the answer to your query. [Read: 15 obvious signs he has a girlfriend and is already taken]
Your friends can be your secret weapons here. Let them know that you like this guy and then get them to drop some hints when he’s around. That will let him know that you like him and help you to figure out whether he’s likely to agree to a date if you ask.
You could also get one of your friends to drop a huge hint, like “you two should go out on a date already!” With a cheeky grin, of course! [Read: 15 super-sneaky ways to get a guy to ask you out and make the first move]
By finding out whether you have any mutual interests in common, you can try and ask him out in a casual way.
This is far less worrying for you and also takes the pressure off.
For instance, if you both love live music, you could casually drop into the conversation that the local bar has a great new band on and that you’re keen to go and see them.
Then you could pretend to have a brain wave – “hey, do you want to come see them too? I’ve heard they’re really good”.
It’s a date, but it sounds casual, so you’re not putting yourself out there too much. [Read: Why isn’t he asking me out yet? 17 very real reasons why]
The next time you bump into him or are having a monosyllabic conversation, just ask him if he’d be interested to go bowling with your friends this weekend or something like that. Tell him you’re one player short and it would be great if he could join you guys.
It’s friendly, nice, and doesn’t really make you look desperate. Then, you can vibe off your friends and show him just how fantastic you are. The hope is that he will then ask you out next time, just the two of you.
If you really can’t bear to ask him out in person, why not do it via social media? It’s not the cowardly way out because you’re going to have to face him at some point anyway.
Simply send him a cheeky message with a casual request, such as “There’s a great movie on at the cinema this weekend, I wondered if you wanted to join me?”
Don’t make it too heavy, just keep things light and breezy. He’s far more likely to say ‘yes’ that way. [Read: How to get a guy’s attention on Instagram without using your body]
This one is sneaky, but it works a charm when learning how to ask a guy out! You could pretend that you’re in a bit of a pinch and that by agreeing to go out with you, he’s doing a favor.
For example, say you have tickets for a big game this weekend but your friend has dropped out, leaving you with a spare ticket. And you need to go alone if he doesn’t agree to take the spare ticket off your hands. Of course, you’ll strategically make sure that the game you’re offering a ticket to is something he actually enjoys. Sneaky, right?
Learning how to ask a guy out doesn’t actually have to involve asking. It can be an accident, but one that isn’t an accident on your part.
You could ask him to help you with something, e.g. you have a flat tire on your car or you need help moving something in your house. Then, when the good deed is over, you could offer to say ‘thank you’ with lunch or a coffee. Boom! A date without even asking! [Read: Damsel in distress: Why men find them so irresistible]
The final option might not be the one you want to go with, but if all else fails, what do you have to lose? Sometimes it’s better to risk a moment of awkwardness for the answer you seek.
Find a good time, i.e. when you’re alone, and just come right out and say it. “Hey, I like spending time with you, I wondered if you wanted to grab a drink sometime?” That’s really all it takes. You’re being upfront and honest but you’re doing it in a casual and non-threatening way. [Read: Can a girl ask a guy out before he makes a move? Here’s what you should know]
You’ve learned how to ask a guy out and you’ve got the answer you wanted. What now?
Well, you need to actually come up with a plan. If you asked him to go to a game or to see a live band with you because you both like them, that part is already taken care of. What you then need to do is make sure that you strike the right balance between flirting and simply being yourself. [Read: How to act on a first date: The little details that play a big part]
Touch him when you’re talking to him, but don’t come on too strong. A girl who touches a guy a lot is either too comfortable with him, or extremely desperate. You’re neither. You’re a classy girl who knows when to touch and when to stand afar.
And don’t flirt too much, either – keep it light and as though what you say could be taken either way. After all, an extremely flirty girl can get pretty boring and annoying. Instead, make him want more. Save your flirting for only a few lines in the entire conversation. Never make it too obvious that you’re falling for him. [Read: How to flirt by touching subtle, in all the right ways]
When you’re talking to him, avoid touching him. And all of a sudden, when there’s no one around, lean forward and whisper something in his ear. It could be gossip or a little flirty comment like ‘I like your shirt’.
As you do that, clasp his hands, and loosely lock your fingers with his. When you keep your distance from him throughout the conversation and suddenly come close once in a few conversations, you’re blowing hot and cold and that will confuse him. It will make him blush, leave him confused and desperately want you closer! [Read: How to get any guy to kiss you whenever you want him to kiss you!]
Of course, in the end, you also need to be yourself. Don’t try and be fake to impress him, you really don’t need to.
You’re a wonderful and interesting person and he’s agreed to go out on a date with you. That’s enough to make you feel at ease that he wants to be there. Relax and enjoy the moment!
[Read: 33 super sexy ways to seduce a guy who isn’t yours yet and drive him crazy]
The next time you like a guy, use this guide on how to ask a guy out without really asking him out. There’s no classier and easier way to ask a guy out than this, and you’re having a great time all the way!
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