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How to Ask a Guy Out Like a Real Classy Girl

how to ask a guy out

Find yourself falling for a cute guy, but just don’t know how to ask him out without sounding desperate? Read this guide on how to ask a guy out the classy girl way!

It’s easy to ask a guy out, but you should avoid doing that. Find out why.

[Read: Can a girl ask a guy out?]

If you like someone and want to ask a guy out, just drop a few hints.

And if he’s interested in you, he’s definitely going to ask you out before you ask him out.

But at times, life can be a tad more complicated than we want it to be. And at times like these, a girl has no choice but to make the first move.

You may have just broken up with this guy’s best friend, both of you could be old buddies [Read: Falling for a friend], or there may be some other complicated reason.

During times like these, you could drop a few hints, but even if he thinks you like him, he may be apprehensive to ask you out.

If you ever find yourself in such a situation, well, you may want to know how to ask a guy out and let him know that you really like him.

Use these pointers on how to ask a guy out without really saying ‘I like you’.

[Read: 20 reasons why a guy may never like you back]

Invite him to go out with your friends

Do you know the guy well already? If you do, you can skip right to the next pointer, where we’ve got some bigger ways to warm him up. But if you’re still only exchanging smiles and not really friends, then you need to become friendly first.

The next time you bump into him or are having a monosyllabic conversation, just ask him if he’d be interested to go bowling with your friends this weekend or something like that. Tell him you’re one player short and it would be great if he could join you guys. It’s friendly, nice and doesn’t really make you look desperate. Once both of you are better friends, you could use the next few pointers and really understand how to ask a guy out without really asking him out! [Read: How to get a guy to like you]

Let him know you’re interested

You don’t have to tell him outright that you have a crush on him, but drop a few signs. When you’re nearing the end of a conversation with him, brush his hair or arm and say something like “you are such a sweet guy, stay this way and I might just fall for you!”

Don’t say things like “you are such a sweet guy, the girl you go out with will be so lucky.” It makes you look like a lost cause. It’s like you can never have him, and only dream of him.

Be confident and don’t be afraid to push the flirty ball into his court now and then. You may put him in a spot, but don’t worry about it. You can always say that line, and say you’ve got to go and walk away like that statement meant nothing to you. It’ll make him smile and wonder if you really like him.

Have touchy feely conversations

Touch him when you’re talking to him, but don’t come on too strong. A girl who touches a guy a lot is either too comfortable with him, or extremely desperate. You’re neither. You’re a classy girl who knows when to touch and when to stand afar.

And don’t flirt too much too. It’s trashy and can bore any guy. After all, an extremely flirty girl can get pretty boring and annoying. Instead, make him want more. Save your flirting for only a few lines in the entire conversation. Never make it too obvious that you’re falling for him. [Read: How to flirt by touching]

When you’re talking to him, avoid touching him. And all of a sudden, when there’s no one around, lean forward and whisper something in his ear. It could be gossip or a little flirty comment like ‘I like your shirt’. As you do that, clasp his hands, and loosely lock your fingers with his. When you keep your distance from him throughout the conversation and suddenly come close once in a few conversations, you’re blowing hot and cold and that would confuse him. It would make him blush, leave him confused and want you closer. [Read: How to talk to a guy and make him want you]

And you should do this when it’s just the both of you because you don’t want some friends to tell him you’ve got the hots for him and stroke his ego.

Watch a movie together

This is easy-peasy and so simple, it’s ridiculous. The next time you’re with this guy you like, pretend to be a bit miffed and tell him about how badly you wanted to watch this particular movie with your friends, but they’re all too busy to go out this weekend. Tell him you’re annoyed and really pissed off. And stop talking.


Yes, unless he’s a dumb mule or already has a girlfriend, he’s probably going to say, “hey, why don’t we go together? I could take you there…”

Is there anything easier than that? Smile and laugh and blush, and continue talking about something else. Don’t thank him though, remember you’re still playing hard to get! He’s not doing you a favor. You’re doing him a favor, you gorgeous thing! [Read: How to play hard to get]

After the movie, if he doesn’t really say anything nice, you could always say, ‘I had such a nice time… we should do this again.’ And if he says ‘how about next week?’ tell him you’re busy!

Plan something a few days later, and always remember to never appear too easy to get. [Read: How to make him want you]

How to ask a guy out

Ever been in a situation where you’ve done everything to let a guy know you like him, and you’re on the verge of holding him by the collar and screaming that you like him and want him to do something about it? [Read: Is he in love with you?]

Now if you’re not dating the guy already, you’re probably in this scenario.

This is dangerous ground and may work in your favor, or perhaps, it won’t. So firstly, remember this. If you’ve used the earlier pointers on him, that’s all you really need to send the message across and make him ask you out. But even if you’ve made it so vaguely clear and he still doesn’t reciprocate or make a move, sorry dearie, he may not be looking at you as anything more than a friend. You could give up and have a happy friendship. Or you could try the last resort, and ask him out. [Read: 9 sneaky ways to get a guy to ask you out first]

Don’t come on too strong. Sit down with him when it’s just the both of you, and tell him that you’ve started to grow very fond of him over the last few weeks. Mention that both of you have been spending so much time together and you’ve started to see what a wonderful and sweet guy he is. Tell him that you think you like him, and would want to see if a relationship can grow out of this friendship.

The ball’s in his court now. It’s no more flirty games. You’ve asked the guy out. Whatever may be the answer, you’ve tried your best without losing your dignity. You’re still a classy girl, in a relationship or otherwise.

[Read: 10 tips to seduce a guy into getting attracted to you]

The next time you like a guy, use this guide on how to ask a guy out without really asking him out. There’s no classier and easier way to ask a guy out than this, and you’re having a great time all the way!

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26 thoughts on “How to Ask a Guy Out Like a Real Classy Girl”

  1. Panny says:

    I’m in love with a guy. And I’m sure he loves me too. We’ve been flirting with each other at the office almost every day. But he’s never asked me out. One day, when both of us were talking, another friend of his even walked in on us and asked him, “are you ever going to tell her how you feel about her?”

    I pretended like I was surprised, but isnide I was just so happy to hear that. I asked him waht it was all about and I could see him blushing and turning pink. But he didnt tell me what it was all about. I’ve always wanted to know what he really thinks about me, and just didn’t know how to go about it. But thanks to you guys, I think this would be the perfect way for me to get him to ask me out.

  2. Smart girl says:

    I think this line makes a lot of sense…


  3. Nonny Chy says:

    Am in love with a gu but I don’t know how to tell him.I don’t even hav his number or know his house address;but we are friends on facebook.How do I let him know that I love him.

  4. Abbie says:

    Very usefull thx xxxx

  5. Paige Elizabeth says:

    There is a guy I work with who I am sure likes me- at times. He will be really sweet one day, then nothing the next. Is he just trying to figure out if I like him? Should I be blunt and ask him if he likes me? Should I tell him that I like him? With guys I never know.

  6. Hello says:

    is this written by a man or a woman?

  7. YMCA says:

    thnnnxxxxxxxx I gavvveeee the guy i liked the hints and he asked me outtt!!!!!!
    xoxoxoxo!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 3

  8. Anya says:

    I read this article as a sort-of study guide before I approached this guy. While these tips may work, I didn’t have the time to go through all of them. I just called him over at work and said “We’ve been friends for a while now, and I’m just going to cut to the chase… Would you like to go out on a date with me?” And he smiled and said “Sure!”

    I realized then that google searching for tips was helpful, if only for convincing me to just go for it. Like I said earlier, these tips may be helpful in some situations, but they certainly aren’t universal. I guess I’m just saying all this just to give the girls like me a little confidence! Good luck! ^.^

  9. H.Snow says:

    I like this guy at work, and he likes me back, but I’m confused because at times he will tell my best friend that he truly really likes me, but he’s confused himself and doesn’t know if he actually wants to be with me. Should I cut him loose?

  10. Melissa Penner says:

    Hey I had been going with this guy for a short while he confessed that he liked me and wanted me to be his steady girl, I had been asked by other guys and have always said no. But I had really liked this one and it freaked me out his cousin ended up asking me out as well amd I said yes. I know retarded. Is there any chance a girl could get the one she really liked back. 🙁

  11. inluv says:

    rite so theres this boy who i know and hes really fit and ive heard that he likes me from all of his bffs and whenever were 2gether we r also bffs we flirt and touch and all that though he can be quitw shy but whenever he gets wind of any of the rumours from his friends he turns prite pink and’ll walk away then there was this rumor going round that i was like snaking him but after hed heard that me and my bff caught every1 saying 2 him that he was actually snaking me and they were only saying that 2 see if i blushed so they’d know how i felt but now every1s calling as a couple and im getting so frustrated coz he like me i think and i definetly like him what do i do?Xx plez help oh and by the way he said that he doesn’t want 2 be single anymore and was looking rite @ me !Xx

  12. Margie says:


  13. RissaLee says:

    My best friend in the whole is who I am in love with. He talks about me all the time. I want to ask him out but do not want to ruin our relationship. What should I do?

  14. GG says:

    No, no, and no!!! Do NOT ask a guy out!!!! Men like the hunt….I’ve heard this over and over from real men. DO NOT ask a guy out ladies!! Let him know in other effective ways. Guys aren’t hard to figure out.

  15. Jessie says:

    Yes you can ask a guy out without sounding like a cat with its paws out. I asked a guy out and a year later he proposed 🙂 (you just have to be calm, cool and flirty 😉

  16. Sandra says:

    This article is all over the place. One minute it says to be bold and take charge and the next to “say you’re busy” when he asks you out.

  17. Greg L says:

    I doubt that was the reason. If you make yourself that clear to a guy, and he doesn’t ask you out, he probably understood what you wanted, but just wasn’t into you. Read up on how to get people to like you more, and use that knowledge on guys you like; an oldie but goodie is “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie.

  18. C says:

    This is freaking ridiculous. If your heart says yes, GO FOR IT! We don’t need extensive internet articles on how to express ourselves, unless we have no idea who we really are. If you feel it, it’s there. Simple.

    And the whole “…pretend to be a bit miffed and tell him about….” is off-putting. “Pretend”? A human desires honesty from their mate, and for anyone else they may encounter for that matter. I realize it’s just playing around, but really? Do we have to play games to uphold our sense of pride and dignity? Let go of all that crap and speak from your soul! If it doesn’t work out, it wasn’t meant to be. Again – SIMPLE!

    You girls are silly and I love you.

  19. SY says:

    IDK this article has a few good points, but most of the advice here is bad.

    Overall, I agree that asking a guy out should be the last resort. I also agree that there are certain situations where the guy’s hands might be tied, and no matter how much he likes the girl he will never ask her out (e.g. if she is his boss or superior), especially if he is shy. I think if there is enough body language and clues exchanged that the feelings may be mutual, and there is some complicated situation and/or the guy is shy or fumbling about “indirectly” asking you out, but cant actually say it directly, it’s perfectly dignified for the girl to do it. I think simple and direct is best in these situations, because the indirect way is just going to lead to misunderstandings, etc. Also, a shy person may not want an audience, if he likes you. I am a shy person as well, and i only want certain people in my “audience” if at all.

    In this article, I dont think the methods that are advised for asking directly are dignified in the least, but very forward, too mushy, and kind of embarrassing to read actually. How about just asking him out to coffee to talk some more, to hang out, etc? that’s pretty low key, friends do that. It doesn’t scream I LIKE YOU, I WANT TO MARRY YOU, but it still plants the seeds in his mind that “hmmm, maybe she likes me…”. Then if there i any mutual interest whatsoever, the guy can then ask the girl out for a real date. Of course by asking someone out, if they accept, you dont necessarily know for sure if they really like you back or if they’re just being nice, but is that really so bad? For a confident (albeit somewhat shy) girl like me, that uncertainty isn’t that big of a deal, and is even a little bit exciting! I feel that not pursuing something that may be there with someone i am interested in (i’m picky) is a greater loss than a small blow to my otherwise intact and quick-healing ego.

    There are of course certain guys who would take it as an ego boost and try to take advantage of a girl who has feelings for him, but not all guys are like that. Before a girl asks a guy out, she should try to gauge whether he is that kind of guy, for sure, and if he is, definitely dont do it. And there is good reason why sex is not advised on the first date (or 2nd date, or even maybe 3rd date or more), but this is the case regardless of whether the guy asks or the girl asks. A guy can ask a girl out just to get laid too.

  20. SY says:

    exactly… it’s all in how you do it. It also heavily depends on the context — if there’s heavy flirting going on, with obvious mutual interest, and the guy is just a bit awkward or something, asking him out yourself is not a faux pas.

  21. SY says:

    I think this is a situation in which you should ask that guy out yourself, because he will not do it anymore since you rejected him. I dont know if he will accept at this point, but at least you will have tried, right?

  22. SY says:

    if he is shy, he may not admit that he likes you if you ask him bluntly. I think rather than telling him you like him, it’s better to SHOW him that you like him. Asking him out is one way. But gauge the situation yourself and see what your intuition tells you. Each situation is different.

  23. SY says:

    he’s a shy guy. You should have asked him out right then and there. Or the next day. What a shame…

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