Ever wanted to have a lesbian experience? Maybe you’ve never thought about it. Maybe you have. Either way, find out what it is really like!
Lots of women have a sexual fantasy that involves another woman. In fact, the lesbian experience fantasy is one of the most popular and common for young women to have.
And why not? Being with another woman doesn’t necessarily make you a lesbian – though obviously it’s OK if you are! But the idea of exploring another woman’s body – even if it is for one night – only can be a serious turn on.
Of course, some fantasies are fantasies for good reason. They can be very disappointing when the idea in your head doesn’t live up to the real-life experience.
Let’s face it, lots of sex can be this way. It might be that we daydream about the romantic way we are going to lose our virginities, but then end up doing it on a gross couch with a guy we barely know… *err… anyone?*
Or buying a billion sex toys for a rampant night of experimentation with your hot lover, only to find you collapse into fits of giggles at the sight of nipple tassels and a butt plug. [Read: The top 10 sexual fantasies for women]
What to expect from a lesbian experience
So if you are thinking of acting out your fantasy of having a lesbian experience, why not find out what it is really like before you do?
Here are just some of the things you can expect, as well as how to make the most out of it:
#1 Nerves. We’re sure that every time you have played it out in your head it is just a hot and steamy night of passion where everything goes exactly according to plan.
The reality is that you are going to probably be pretty nervous.
Doing something for the first time is always daunting, so try to stay calm and not let the nerves get the better of you. Meet somewhere neutral and have a few drinks to give you that helpful bit of confidence first! [Read: Is she a lesbian? 6 clear signs to know for sure]
#2 Communicate. So, girl-on-girl sex works much better if you have an open line of communication *actually this is true of all sex, but that’s besides the point*.
If you aren’t sure how to impress your lady lover, then just ask her. It is far better to get her to tell you or – even better, guide you – rather than you getting all worked up over whether what you are doing is ‘right’ and then ruining the evening for the both of you.
#3 Self-love. If you want to get some practice, who better to practice on than yourself?! Sure, every girl is different, but we’ve all got the same basic ‘tools’ going on down there, so why not experiment on yourself first?
#4 Boobs. Boobs are actually a little strange when you come face to face with ones that don’t belong to you for the first time *and you aren’t in the gym changing rooms of course*.
Often it can be a little confusing to know exactly what to do with them! Boobs like to be played with, stroking, kissing, fondling, caressing, sucking – you get the picture. Again, communication is key. Find out what she likes, and be sure to tell her what you like too.
#5 Trial and error. Like we mentioned earlier, every lady is different – so if you are enjoying your very first lesbian experience with the fairer sex, you might just have to accept that you need to figure things out with each other by testing the waters and seeing what works.
Some gals achieve orgasm through hard and fast clitoral stimulation, others prefer slowly rubbing and building up.
#6 Oral sex. Giving oral sex to a woman for the first time can feel somewhat daunting. You may well have received it before, but the actual idea of doing it yourself can be a little scary *and hot, of course!*
Again, trial and error have a huge part to play. If you have been with guys before, you might have noticed that they all have different techniques – some you might have enjoyed, others not so much.
Focusing on the clit, varying the pressure, and, of course, asking them what they like will all help you become an expert in no time!
#7 Protection. Just because you can’t get pregnant when with a woman doesn’t mean you shouldn’t think about protection. Though the likelihood is generally reduced, women can still pass on STDs to one another, so it is a good idea to prepare and protect yourself against this.
You can buy dental dams which are small square of latex places over the genitals in order to prevent the transmission of disease, or simply split open a condom and use that to cover instead. [Read: Why do guys drool when two girls kiss each other?]
#8 Toys. Lots of ladies like to bring a little bit of extra fun to the bedroom. If you are comfortable discussing this with your lady lover you can find out what you both might like to experiment with beforehand. Anything from vibrators to strap-ons can add to your pleasure.
However, if you are just looking for a one time lesbian experience, or it’s your first time, it might be a good idea to hold off and just enjoy each other – no gadgets necessary.
#9 The big O. Obviously, the idea of doing the deed with a woman is a massive turn on for you, and that’s great! You may have just fantasized about it, or watched some lesbian porn, or simply just have a burning desire to find out what it is like.
The point is that if you have ever masturbated over the idea of lesbian sex and had an orgasm, this doesn’t necessarily mean the same will happen when it comes down to it in real life.
If you haven’t had sex before, or your only other experiences have been with men, this will feel new and different and may take some getting used to.
It’s also important to remember that women generally tend to take a little bit more time to achieve orgasm then men. So if you come quickly, and she takes a while – that’s fine, and it’s the same the other way around. [Read: Sure ways to tell if you’re really bi-curious]
Just remember that having an orgasm isn’t the only thing that makes great sex, so don’t let this be your only goal when it comes to a lesbian experience. Otherwise, you may end up feeling disappointed.
Having a lesbian experience for the first time can be truly thrilling. However, there is a lot to think about.
If you have fantasized about the idea of getting down and dirty with a girl then that’s great, and why not make your fantasy a reality? It is just important to remember that it might not quite be exactly how you expected – and that’s okay.
If you truly want to have fulfilling, exciting lesbian experience then, as with anything, you need to have trust, great communication, and be okay with a little experimentation to see what works for you *and them!*
We hope this has given you insight into what a lesbian experience is like as well as some handy tips for when you actually do it. Have you had a lesbian sexual experience? What was it like? Let us know!
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Bethany was born and raised in Scotland and now resides in Brighton where she lives with her partner and rather disobedient cocker spaniel pup. She works as a f...