Click here to read the experience of having an affair with a married man from the beginning.
Of all the relationships you can get into as a girl, dating a married man is one of the worst kinds.
When you enter into a relationship with married men, inevitably you step into a world that can reveal a lot of joy, and yet, tear all the happiness away instantly.
And this cycle of happiness and pain repeats itself until you can’t take it anymore. But why do women fall into this trap in the first place?
Dating a married man
Indulging in a relationship with married men is confusing, but almost all the experiences that come with it feel the same.
And it always starts with the same feelings of confusion, hesitation and attraction. And women, by nature are completely helpless in such circumstances.
Getting into a relationship with married men
We love helping people we like out of troubling situations. And admit it, you’d love a man who’s a mess, if he likes you.
When a married man fancies you, you’re elated. But when he looks towards you for emotional support and love, the same things his own wife, apparently, doesn’t provide him, you end up falling in love, more with his emotional affairs rather than anything else.
That one conversation in the office cubicle takes you all the way to the coffee shop, the snack bar, the restaurant, and the movie hall. Both of you end up talking about it over the phone, and at some point of time, there’s a total block of his family turmoil.
All you start talking about is the good times both of you share every day. And then, one fine day, just before hanging up he says, “Sweetheart, if only I wasn’t married, I would be so in love with you. And frankly, I already am…” Pop goes the weasel.
The beginning of the end
The real dark story unveils here. The little innocent doe in you (in most cases) braves itself up and walks curiously ahead. You’re flattered to know he loves you, no man who’s so sweet has ever told you something like that. You realize you love him too. But then, what’s the ending of the story?
He’s a married man, and you know you don’t want to fall, but he’s such an emotional wreck, and the most striking part of it all is, he’s totally in love with you. Apparently!
Now, you warm up to him to shower him with happiness, and the next thing you know, you’re snogging him in hallways of movie theaters and bouncing off walls in your apartment, all in the purpose of making him a happier man! [Read: Cheating in a relationship] And unknown to you, you’re preparing yourself for the inevitable. You’re entering into a relationship with a married man! And before you know it, you’re way past knee deep, you’re almost choking with the bottled affections you have for this man.
Beyond this point, there’s no looking back. You don’t care about his family or his wife. You just want this man. All for yourself. You’re dating a married man, and you want him all for yourself.
The wife and the other woman
The worst part of all this is that you’d never really want to be in this place, but somehow, you find yourself here. Lost, angry, annoyed and on the dark side. All of a sudden, you’re not just another nice girl. You’re the “other woman” who’s dating a married man. [Read: Feel lost in life]
You’re marked from the rest of the world. You are a home wrecker. But it doesn’t matter to you, because you know this man loves you, and wants you more than he wants his own wife. That’s what you’d believe anyways.
He constantly reminds you that he loves you a lot more than he loves his wife, but he’s just not able to walk out, what with his kids, wife, and even his mom involved in the scene. He’d love you physically, but his emotions still stay with his real family. This can piss off just about anyone, especially when they’re so madly in love, but the promise of better things to come in the ‘near’ future and the sex is just too good of a promise to spurn the advances of a married man.
The realization – Being used by a married man
When I was involved with a married man, I felt terribly used. I hated myself for doing what I was doing, and yet, I couldn’t help myself. I was helplessly in love. That’s what happens to any woman who’s involved with a married man, because when you’re the “other woman” there are no weekends together, no family parties, no meeting friends, nothing.
You are just a mysterious part of a married man’s life that surfaces when he packs his bag and tells his wife he’s travelling to another city. It’s insulting, especially when he says you mean so much to him, but that’s the life you have to accept.
And it’s never a pretty sight. And every time you ask him to walk out of his relationship, it would just lead to frustrated tears. There is no way he’s ready to do that, even if your closet love goes on for a few years. It’s the same feeling every morning. You wake up feeling cheated, used and totally and miserably helpless. It’s a disgusting feeling to live with, trust me.
Dating a married man is painful and demeaning. And at times, it can take years for you to accept the love of a genuine man you meet later in life. But all this is just the tip of the iceberg of problems when you have a relationship with married men. Click here to know how all this can make you a home wrecker and the other woman.
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