There are guys out there that you should avoid like the plague. Trust me, I’ve met many of them. However, there are more good guys than you might believe. In my opinion, there are certain qualities to look for in a man which will help you to find someone who isn’t a total waste of time. They might actually stand a good chance of being a great choice. Of course, you need a few of these qualities, or preferably all of them, to make it work, but being aware of what to look for is always useful.
It’s easy to have one or two bad experiences *or three of four, if you’re me* and assume that they’re all the same. They’re not. You just don’t know what to look for.
You might think you have a few ideas in mind, but let me share my list of qualities to look for in a man. See if you can use them to find Mr Right, and not just Mr Right Now.
[Read: A compelling case against dating the proverbial bad boy]
Qualities to look for in a man
#1 Trustworthy. If you can’t trust the dude, he’s a waste of time! Can you imagine a relationship with zero trust? You’ll be constantly on edge, paranoid, and convinced that he’s out doing all manner of nastiness with someone who isn’t you. Being able to trust a guy is key. In fact it’s the biggest of them all, so always listen to your gut on this one. [Read: The devious signs of sneaky people that should make you run]
#2 Sense of humor. I know, it’s an oldie, but it’s definitely a goodie. You need a guy who can make you laugh, and someone who is always able to laugh at himself. Good jokes and a quick one liner will have you smiling for hours, but a guy who doesn’t seem able to string even a few funny words together is not someone you want to roll through life with.
#3 Doesn’t take himself too seriously. This links in with the sense of humor. It’s definitely one of the qualities to look for in a man you can be comfortable with and laugh with. A guy who doesn’t take himself too seriously is a normal, down to earth guy. Someone who isn’t so far up his own backside that he can’t smile when things don’t go his way. [Read: What you should really be looking for in a relationship]
#4 How he treats women. Look at how a guy treats his mother and sisters to find out what type of person he is. Is he protective and caring? Or, is he the opposite? For me, a guy who treats the women in his life with care and respect is someone to have in your life, no matter who you are and what you’re looking for.
#5 How he treats animals. Another one that is very important to me is how a guy treats animals. I thought it was going well with a guy once, then he kicked a cat out of the way. That was it for me. A guy must treat animals with love and respect, don’t you agree?
#6 His basic core values. A guy who loves his family, respects everyone around him, and treats people how he wants to be treated is a guy to stick with. Quality and down to earth values are certainly up there with the qualities to look for in a man. [Read: 20 qualities of a good man that makes him reliable and desirable]
#7 He has some kind of future plan. It’s not a great sign when a guy has no idea what he wants in life and doesn’t seem to care that he has no plan at all. I’m not suggesting he should have his life mapped out, but a general direction is always something to look for.
#8 Determination. When he wants something, does he go after it with gusto? It’s an attractive quality. It’s something you should definitely be on the lookout for. This means he has fire in his belly!
#9 Generally caring and kind. You need someone in your life who is caring and who shows kindness to those around him. This is one of the qualities to look for in a man you want to spend time with, whether dating or otherwise. [Read: The 20 qualities in a guy that make him a really good man]
#10 Generosity. I’m not suggesting he should be willing to give every last penny he owns to anyone who asked. But a guy who is generous of heart, spirit, and anything he has *to a degree* is a good thing. This shows that he knows what’s important in life.
#11 He isn’t money-centered. A guy who only cares about money and focuses his entire life on getting more is not someone to build a future. Sure, money is important but it’s not the be all and end all. A guy who focuses on love and experiences is a far better bet. So, you need someone who doesn’t care about money nor be irresponsible with it either. [Read: On the flipside, here’s what makes a girl dateable and a real catch]
#12 Supportive. He should be supportive of you when you’re going through a hard time and when you’re working towards something in your life. Having a supportive guy around is one of the biggest blessings. It gives you the fire to reach for the stars. It’s definitely one of the top qualities to look for in a man.
#13 Respectful. A guy who shows respect to everyone around him is super-attractive to me. The means treating the waiter with respect. It mans respecting animals, the time you put into cooking a meal, or buying a gift. Respect is super-attractive and a huge must-have!
#14 A good listener. You don’t need a guy who has one ear on what you’re saying and one ear on the TV. Find yourself a good listener. You’ll be set for life. If he gives great advice, even better!
#15 Intelligence. While you don’t have to look out for the highest IQ in the world, you do need someone who you can have an intelligent conversation with about something other than the weather. This way, you’ll never be bored and have to resort to talking about the same thing every day. Of course, a guy who also wants to learn and better himself is a good starting point too! [Read: Intellectual questions to cue smart talk with anyone]
#16 Protective of those he cares about. A guy who is super-protective of the people he cares about in his life is one of the best qualities to look for in a man. It means you’ll always feel safe and loved. You’ll always know where you stand.
How many of these qualities to look for in a guy do you agree with? Add some of your own! While you don’t have to go around with a clipboard, ticking off qualities and weighing one guy up against the other, bear in mind the things you want in a man. Then, when you meet someone, you’re not wasting your time or his chasing something that’s just not right for you. Of course, it also means that when you meet Mr Right, you’ll probably know pretty quickly!
[Read: 20 personality traits that make a guy an ideal match]
These 16 qualities to look for in a man help you to find someone who is caring, kind, down to earth, intelligent, and will protect you. Understanding what to look for versus what not to put up with is the key.
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