High Maintenance Woman: What Makes a Girl One, 27 Signs & How to Date Her

Are you dating a high-maintenance woman? If she exhibits these signs and occasionally seems a little difficult, it’s quite likely to be the case!

high maintenance woman

Once a woman is given the tag of being high-maintenance, it’s hard to shift it. But, is it really so bad to be a high-maintenance woman?

We’re talking about a woman who knows what she wants and won’t settle for anything less. How can there be anything negative about that? Of course, a high-maintenance girl may be a little too demanding at times, which could cause a headache for whoever they’re dating.

If you’re unsure if the girl you’re dating falls under the high-maintenance category, it’s time to spot the signs. [Read: Things men want in a woman more than anything else]

What does high maintenance mean?

Despite the stereotype, a high-maintenance woman is not a “gold digger.” Instead, think of high-maintenance women as women who merely have high standards. They’ve lived those high standards, and expect those standards to be maintained.

There really is nothing wrong with women who spend a little more time looking good, are motivated by their own standards, know what they want, and are driven to succeed.

They may be challenging, but with the right approach, you can snag yourself a high-maintenance woman for keeps and have her take care of you just as well as she takes care of herself.

Some people assume that high-maintenance means she demands everything her way and refuses to compromise. In some cases, that can be true. However, not all high-maintenance girls are quite so difficult. [Read: Higher standards – why going low only leads to lousy relationships]

Key signs of a high-maintenance woman

If you can nod along to the following signs when thinking about the woman in your life, the chances are that she’s high-maintenance. Or, maybe you’re reading this and wondering if you’re slightly on the difficult side yourself! In that case, maybe you’re a high-maintenance girl at heart.

1. All eyes on her

All eyes always turn towards her no matter where she is.

She literally sucks the air out of any room she walks into, but no one even notices her man unless he’s clinging to her arm. [Read: How to look cute and melt a guy’s heart in 25 ways]

2. She likes fine dining

She likes being pampered in the finest of places, and there’s really nothing wrong about it. Well, unless her man can’t afford it!

3. She needs money to be happy

This may sound harsh, but is it so bad to want to be wealthy and have the money to indulge in the good things life has to offer? [Read: Money can buy you happiness in love]

4. She likes splurging on bling often

She likes buying new jewelry or extravagant things several times a month. It makes her happy.

5. She thinks she’s better than other girls

And she does everything possible to hold that view. She has very high self-esteem and confidence and doesn’t like being put down by any other woman.

6. She looks like she stepped out of a salon at all times

She’s beautiful and extremely well-dressed all the time. Any guy that walks past can’t help but notice her and be in awe. [Read: 20 things that turn a guy on when he sees a girl]

7. She pays a lot of attention to expensive details

She just can’t help it. She believes that expensive things look better than average mass-produced stuff. She likes it when everything around her reflects her class and makes a style statement.

8. When she likes something, she wants it

She doesn’t like being refused. She believes she deserves what she wants and she won’t rest until she gets it.

9. Her man gets nervous when she decides to go shopping

It’s not that she always throws money away, just that she uses it to look good and make things around her look good. However, her man thinks she’s just wasting money. [Read: How to talk about money with your partner without fighting about it]

10. She can’t step out of the house without makeup

She hates revealing any flaws, be it her complexion or any other aspect of her life. To her, there is enjoyment in looking like a glam goddess no matter where she is.

11. She’s a perfectionist

But it’s likely her man thinks she’s a spoiled brat. She hates mediocrity in anything she does and she wants to be the best. That includes having the best of everything too.

12. She thinks she deserves a better man

She thinks she’s way better than her guy. This thought may have passed her mind quite a few times, even though she pushes it away. [Read: How to deal with self-centered people without losing your mind]

13. She has more guy friends, aka admirers

She thinks she’s a fun girl, but most girls usually hate her or think she’s a snob. Guys love her company, but girls usually excuse themselves from her in the middle of a conversation. Not that she cares! [Read: Why guys friends are nothing but trouble]

14. She wants everything to be perfect

And if it’s not, she wants her man to fix it for her. She doesn’t depend on her man for everything, but she does expect him to treat her like his queen.

15. She gets embarrassed easily

She feels terribly embarrassed when her man doesn’t behave or look presentable. In this case, she even tries to ignore his presence or avoid him. After all, his bad manners are an insult to her gorgeous presence!

16. She doesn’t go with the flow

A high-maintenance girl often finds it hard to just go with the flow. She’s a planner and likes to have everything just so. When she attempts to go with the flow, she feels out of control. [Read: Why men like damsels in distress]

17. She often gives out errands to run

It might be her man, her friend, or even her family! If she’s got something to do, it’s far better for someone else to do it for her. It’s not that she’s lazy, she’s just far too busy making herself look presentable!

High-maintenance women and the men they date

Many men fear the idea of dating a high-maintenance woman. They desperately want to date her, but shrivel up at the mere thought of it. But then again, a high-maintenance woman isn’t for every man, is she?

In general, a high-maintenance woman may sound scary to most men. But it’s never bad for a woman to know what she wants in life. In many ways, high maintenance is subjective. What may seem like high maintenance to one man may seem like nothing to another man who can cater to her needs.

After all, if a man can afford her whims, he obviously won’t call her a high-maintenance woman, even if she’s a big spender with rich taste in everything. [Read: How to make your boyfriend want you more than ever]

Do high-maintenance women get better men?

It may be unfair to other women, but high-maintenance women do get better men, almost all the time. They’re extremely confident and almost always have a better life unless they’re with the wrong man.

Men love a chase. If she’s high-maintenance and believes she’s the best girl, every man will be awed by her confidence and will try to woo her and win her fancy. Being high-maintenance is actually the best way to bag a worthy man.

A high-maintenance woman is respected and awed. But not all women can be her. And not all men can be with her. [Read: The reason behind why men like a chase]

The pros and cons of dating a high-maintenance woman

This type of woman isn’t for everyone. But, if you’re up to the challenge, it’s important to know the pros and cons of dating a high-maintenance girl before you get in over your head.


1. She always looks great, so you’ll have no problems being super-attracted to her

2. She’ll likely push you to greatness

3. Dating a high-maintenance girl is certainly a boost for your confidence [Read: How to be confident – 28 life hacks to transform your future forever]

4. She’s likely to be fit and healthy

5. She’ll age better because she looks after herself so well


1. She might get bored and replace you

2. You’ll have to wait longer for her to get ready before you go out [Read: 22 secret signs you’re dating an egomaniac]

3. She will expect the finer things in life, which come with a high price-tag

4. She is demanding so she might make the waiter feel bad when you eat out [Read: What makes someone an attention seeker and how to read these traits]

How to date a high-maintenance woman

If you want to date a high-maintenance woman without breaking the bank, pull off these budget-friendly tricks to keep her happy, without emptying your wallet!

1. Fine dining at home

You know she likes good food, but it doesn’t have to be pricey. Instead of taking her out to a fine-dining restaurant, why not make that Michelin-starred five-course dinner right in your own home?

Look up recipes on the internet, learn how to plate your food, and start grocery shopping *or make do with what’s already in your pantry*. Dress up in your finest suit, turn on her favorite love songs, light some candles to set the mood, and be her very own personal chef. [Read: Very romantic dinner date ideas]

2. Blockbuster movie night

You may not be able to give her the red carpet treatment to attend a star-studded premiere, but you can make the stars—and the moon—be your audience. Take her on an outdoor movie night or even head to a drive-in.

Bring out some popcorn or champagne, and she’ll definitely have a great time. It’s cheaper and way more romantic.

3. Whisk her off to an island getaway

Online couponing sites have a plethora of deals to suit every occasion and location, so take advantage of these and save on your travel and accommodation costs.

Plan a romantic trip months ahead, and you’ll be sure to save 50% to 75% on your costs. Ride off into the sunset with her on a private island, and she won’t know how much you’ve saved using your coupons. [Read: Tips to have a great time when you travel as a couple]

4. Take advantage of deals

Take a cue from the point above and subscribe to online coupon and deal sites to always be updated on the latest offers from the merchants you both love.

It could be for out-of-town breaks, vacations overseas, hotel staycations, wellness and facial treatments, or even short lessons you can do together. You can even go a step further and add in a gift you snagged via an online bargain. [Read: 17 brilliant yet simple ways to save money as a couple]

5. Do some research

Instead of whisking her off to places you know she’s been already, why not dig a little deeper and ask her friends about the things she really likes?

Although you might be afraid of trying something new, even if the new place has a lot of character, she isn’t going to mind if she truly loves the flavors.

Take her to a hole-in-the-wall Thai place, a newly-opened gourmet pizza joint, a modern gastropub, or an eclectic coffee shop. See her eyes beam not because you took her somewhere expensive, but because you took the time to know what she likes. [Read: Date ideas men love but women actually hate]

6. Go local

Check your community events for plays and other things that may interest her. You may not have enough to buy her tickets to concerts and theater plays, but you can try alternatives.

Maybe take her to a community theater’s take on Les Miserables or maybe even dance together while attending a concert of an up-and-coming local band. [Read: Getting ready tips for guys going out for a date]

7. Stay home

Staying home is also a great option. Cook together, watch a movie, play board games, work out, or even teach each other a new hobby as an affordable way to go on a date. All of this can bring you closer together.

She may be a high-maintenance girl, but you can always try to stay out of the traditional date bandwagon and give the two of you a great time in a comfortable place.

8. Call on some reinforcements

Do you have a friend who can give you a free pass to VIP seats at the hippest clubs? Or, do you have a cousin who can give you discount rates at her favorite shops, restaurants, hotels, and resorts? Maybe you have a bartender or waiter friend who can give you good tables and freebies?

It’s time to take advantage of your connections and ring in some favors — you may even impress your girl. [Read: Top fun and romantic summer date ideas]

9. Go historic

Whether you take her to a museum, exhibit, historical landmark, or even just show her something from your own family history, she will appreciate it if you share something you hold dear.

Even if it’s not all glitz and glamor, and the ancestral house you showed her is a tad too dusty, you can spend the rest of the day telling her your amazing family history. Or you can just laugh your heads off at the funny-looking trinkets and the even-goofier tour guide.

10. Give her a breath of fresh air

You may not have everything that she’s used to, but you can always keep her excited and delighted by giving things a fresh perspective with your own budget-friendly, yet thoughtful twist.

Take her outdoors even if she’s not used to living only with the bare necessities. Who knows? She might end up enjoying it, after all. [Read: Romantic gestures from the olden days that all girls miss]

Who should or shouldn’t date a high-maintenance woman?

Many people are intimidated by the idea of dating a high-maintenance woman. Perhaps it is because of the many misconceptions and stereotypes associated with the term. Yet, not all high-maintenance women are self-absorbed.

Although, some are. Many high-maintenance girls simply walk around with their noses high in the air and don’t give a thought to anyone else. But others are different. [Read: Dating an independent woman – 28 expectations and other must-knows]

Some high-maintenance girls just know what they want and refuse to compromise. It’s about choosing your partner well. If you choose to date the latter, you simply need to know yourself and your values.

However, if you accidentally choose the former, well, you’re in for a tough ride!

So, who should date a high-maintenance woman, and who shouldn’t? Anyone who thinks they can handle it should go for it! But don’t be surprised if you find yourself having to come up with sparkly date ideas to keep her happy!

[Read: 28 types of girls you shouldn’t fall for at all costs]

When you date a high-maintenance woman, you need to know what you’re getting into from the start. But, in the end, she’s just a woman who knows what she wants.

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
Vin Serai is the founder of LovePanky.com, and has delved deep into the working of love and relationships for almost two decades. Having dipped his feet in almo...