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How to Pleasure a Man: 13 Secrets to Take Control & Blow His Mind

They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. While there’s some truth to that, understanding how to pleasure a man is a truer way.

how to pleasure a man

Here’s the thing about knowing how to pleasure a man, you don’t have to actually try that hard. See, so many women think you need to bake an extravagant cake and serve it on our naked body. I mean, that’s not a bad idea and if you want to do it, you totally can.

However, you don’t always have to go above and beyond when it comes to pleasing your man. In fact, most men are happy when you’re just turned on and into having sex with them. So, you don’t necessarily have to sit online, looking up the latest gadgets for the bedroom.

How to pleasure your man

You know the saying, the simpler, the better. It’s really true. So, I will tell you some ways where you can learn how to please your man without having to hang yourself upside from your ceiling fan. And here you thought you needed to suspend yourself six-feet in the air while singing his favorite song. Of course, it’s entertaining but not necessary.

So, let’s not waste any more time, take out your notepad, here we go. Figuring out how to pleasure a man is not as hard as you think it is.

#1 Actually want to have sex. I cannot tell you how many men say to me that the biggest problem is their girlfriend doesn’t want sex. You don’t need to do anything fancy as long as you genuinely want sex with him. People can tell when you’re not actually into having sex.

So, if you’re going to have sex with him, actually want sex. If not, maybe look at your relationship a little closer. [Read: Subtle conversation starters to get you both really horny]

#2 Make the first move. Yeah, I know. We’re trained to wait for the man to make the first move ,but let’s be honest, we’re not in the 1940s anymore. You can actually be the one to initiate intimacy with your man. He’ll be pleasantly surprised and really turned on. Trust me, he’ll be hard. [Read: How to initiate sex with your partner]

#3 Touch yourself in front of him. You’re a sexual being. If you want to know how to pleasure a man, don’t be shy to show that to him. In the beginning, you may be uncomfortable, but there’s nothing awkward about this. Laying in front of your man while you masturbate is extremely sexy and stimulating for him. Men are visual and watching you pleasure yourself is a huge turn on.

#4 Blowjobs are still a thing. If you’ve been with your man for a while, blowjobs are probably a distant memory for him. Yes, there was a time where you sucked his dick. But now, that’s in his scrapbook of “fondest moments.” Men love getting blowjobs. You don’t need to ask him—just unzip his pants and give him a surprise.

#5 Mix it up. The reason why sex becomes a chore is that people don’t mix things up in the bedroom. Instead, they turn it into a routine. If you can list, in order, everything you do in bed, well, it’s time to mix it up. Change the speed, position, lift a leg up. Basically, heighten the arousal. [Read: 17 naughty sex moves to stifle the yawn and go crazy in bed]

#6 He wants to let loose in bed. Some women find it disrespectful to have sex in doggy style or have a man spit in her mouth, but this is a part of sex. During sex, unleash yourself and do everything that makes you horny and aroused. Be wild and let loose and so does he. Let him rip your bra off or take off your panties with his teeth.

#7 Make some noise. Who gives a shit if the neighbors can hear you? What is sex without any screaming, moaning, or dirty talk? Men want to hear you enjoying the experience with them. So, if you feel comfortable doing so, verbalize it. You don’t have to give him an essay of how it feels but don’t be afraid to tell him to fuck you harder or that he’s being a bad boy. [Read: How to sound sexy in bed and arouse your partner]

#8 What does he secretly want to do? Now, you don’t necessarily have to fulfill his fantasies if you don’t feel comfortable doing so. But, if you want to know how to pleasure a man in bed, you should at least know what they are. Everyone has a secret fantasy that they want to explore but may be too scared to admit. Find out what his fantasies are. If you want, explore them with him. He loves that you take an interest into what turns him on. Plus, you’re doing it without judgment.

#9 Don’t forget the anus. Not all men are a fan of it, but to be honest, that’s only because of the stigma against anal play. In reality, there are so many nerve endings in the anus, it’s impossible for men not to be aroused by anal play. You don’t need to stick a sex toy into his anus, but you start by just pressing on it gently with your finger. Then, slowly, stick your finger into his anus. Oh, just make sure your nails are short… ouch. [Read: 12 moves to make him blow his load and cum almost instantly]

#10 Use every inch of his body. Yes, we all know that the penis is a big part of sex, but it’s not the main part. Stick his fingers in your mouth, scratch his back, pull his hair, spit on him, rub his balls, these are all highly arousing acts because his senses are heightened. Pay attention to the penis, but you shouldn’t focus all your attention on it. There are so many other areas that need attention as well.

#11 Have sex out of the bedroom. Yes, the bedroom is for sleeping and having sex but isn’t that a little boring after a while? Why not have sex on the couch or against the wall? Even the kitchen table is a great place to get frisky. Don’t limit yourself to just the bathroom, try different places out when having sex.

#12 Don’t rush through foreplay. I know you want sex, and of course, he does as well, but don’t rush it. Sure, a quickie can be a lot of fun, but what’s better is when you explore each other through foreplay. Build up the chemistry and sexual tension between you, we all know that the actual penetration part doesn’t last long, so elongate the arousal through foreplay. [Read: 12 foreplay moves that work exceptionally well on men]

#13 Don’t be so quick to say no. Listen, you’re human and so is he. It’s normal for you to have the urge to explore and try new things. If he suggests something, don’t be so quick to say no. Why not just give it a try? If it works, great. If not, well, you gave it a try and didn’t like it. If you want to enjoy sex and your partner explore your sexuality and their sexuality.

[Read: How to make love to a man – 20 unforgettable moves to master]

See? And you thought you needed all the gizmos and gadgets so your man can have a good time. Save your money and follow these tips for how to pleasure a man instead.

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Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and ...
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