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How to Spice Up a Relationship: 20 Ways to Go from Bland to Ka-Pow

how to spice up a relationship

Has your sex life got sleepy lately? Never fear! Here are some fantastic tips for how to spice up a relationship and make it steam.

It is important to make sure that you work at your sex life. While no one expects you to want to keep up the three times a day routine, if you feel like you stopped giving each other much attention when it comes to the bedroom department, perhaps now is the time to start looking at how you can inject some spice *and fun* back into your sex life. Learn how to spice up a relationship and start appreciating one another again.

For many, once past the honeymoon period, it can be easy to see your sex life fall into decline. There is nothing wrong with this per se. We are not as young as we used to be, and the can’t-wait-to-get-you-into-bed-must-rip-your-clothes-off-right-this-second attitude is a pretty exhausting one to maintain for years to come.

Let’s face it, we all have nights where a good book and a cup of peppermint tea is far more appealing than a saucy romp under the covers. [Read: How to spice up missionary sex]

How to spice up a relationship

Of course, all relationships are different, and there is no fool-proof answer when it comes to keeping that sexy spark alive. The excitement, mystery, and downright horniness of your initial relationship will all heighten your attraction to someone. There is still no reason why your sex life should become stale, even if it feels like you’ve been with your partner forever.

So, with this in mind, check out these 20 tips for how to spice up a relationship once more.

#1 Have a date night. Making time for each other can be hard when you are juggling jobs, hobbies, social lives, and so on. It is so important to set aside time to invest in your relationship. Planning a romantic date night once a week means you are sure to get some action at the end! [Read: 13 naughty date night ideas to make some sizzle]

#2 Go on a break together. This could be a sun and sand filled two week vacation, or just an overnight stay at a local hotel. Whatever you’ve got the time and money for, getting out of your routine and going away together can make things feel fresh and new once more. [Read: Is it too soon to start traveling with your partner?]

#3 Take up a hobby together. If you can share your passions outside of the bedroom, chances are you’ll share you passions in it too! Finding something you both love to do together can remind you how much fun you have, and why you chose each other in the first place.

#4 Be surprising. Planning a great surprise for your partner is sure to go down well when you’re trying to figure how to spice up a relationship. It shows them how much you care which will bring you closer together too!

#5 Get some distance. If you are the kind of couple that is all over one another all of the time, perhaps what you really need is a little space. If you’ve got no time to miss each other, no room to breathe, you are more likely to feel sick of the sight of one another rather than want to tear each other’s clothes off.

Find something to do that regularly gets you out of the house, separately or go on a holiday with friends. Being away from each other will make you miss each other more.

#6 Talk to one another. Communication is the key to a successful relationship, so make sure you always communicate openly with your partner. If you feel neglected, let them know. Do it in a way that doesn’t sound accusing or like you are placing blame. [Read: How to fix the lack of communication in your relationship]

#7 Make a future plan. Discussing the future together will make you realize how committed you are to one another. Future plans can be so exciting and make you feel giddy and happy for all that’s to come.

#8 Have a fight… and then make up. Having a passionate row that ends with passionate sex can be just the ticket when it comes to remembering why you are so compatible under the covers.

#9 Get a couples massage. Doing something relaxing, romantic, and fun together can be the perfect prompt to make you feel like continuing on when you get home.

#10 Get over your petty arguments. If you have the same silly arguments again and again, sit down and talk them through properly. Or just let them go. Sometimes it’s the little things that make you bicker. They can get in the way of enjoying your relationship.

If you spent the evening fighting over whose turn it is to do the washing up, you’re not exactly likely to want to get down and dirty when you go to bed.

#11 Reminisce about the past. Remembering what you used to be like when you were young and carefree as a couple can reignite those old passionate flames. Take a trip down memory lame, go back to where you had your first date, or look at old pictures of times you enjoyed together and see where it takes you.

#12 Get some sex toys. If you feel like when you do have sex, it is just the same tired old routine, then why not go to a sex shop together and see if you can find some little treats to give you both extra pleasure? [Read: Naughty first-timer? 13 sex toys that are a must]

#13 See a sex therapist. Sometimes we all need a helping hand, and there is nothing wrong with admitting that we do. Talking to an impartial third party about your relationship can really help air out any concerns and will help you understand your partner better too.

#14 Write a romantic letter to one another. It is easy to forget to tell the person we love just how much we do and why. So why not write a letter telling your partner what is so great about them. Get them to do the same for you too!

#15 Be each other’s cheerleader. If you support your partner and cheer them on in life, they will do the same for you. Being supportive is so important and sometimes it is easy to forget to do so!

#16 Take a steamy bath or shower. If you want a more direct approach, nothing beats getting naked and soapy in the bathtub! [Read: Top 50 kinky ideas that’s worth trying at least once in your lifetime]

#17 Cook for one another. Take it in turns to cook one another a romantic meal, or better still, cook a meal together, open a bottle of wine, and just enjoy your time together.

#18 Have a TV ban. It’s all too easy to spend hours staring mindlessly at the TV set. At least once a week have a TV ban and use the evening to actually talk to one another!

#19 Flirt. When you have been going out with someone for ages, sometimes you can forget how to flirt. It might take you a while to get back into the swing of things, but flirting is sexy and fun and so good for your relationship. [Read: How to keep the flirting alive forever]

#20 Do a challenge together. Whether it is something you are scared of, or something that physically tests you, doing something challenging together can bring you closer together.

[Read: 15 reasons why couples get bored with their relationship]

These 20 tips for how to spice up a relationship are great if you hope to reignite the flame in your relationship. So, if you feel as though your relationship could do with a boost, why not give these a go?

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Bethany Locke
Bethany Locke
Bethany was born and raised in Scotland and now resides in Brighton where she lives with her partner and rather disobedient cocker spaniel pup. She works as a f...
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