Have you ever wondered how to tell someone to leave you alone without feeling like a horrible person? The good news is, it’s easier than you think!
Sometimes, we attract people we really wish we hadn’t. Or, we end up talking to someone and they just don’t get the message that you’re ready to go home – alone! Handily, it’s not so hard to learn how to tell someone to leave you alone without feeling terrible about it. It’s even easier when it comes to how to tell someone to leave you alone over text – when you’re not face-to-face, everything seems much less stressful!
Let’s be honest, you went out to have a couple of drinks and meet some people. What you didn’t come for? To be stalked by some person who’s drooling at the sight of you.
Though it’s somewhat flattering, this type of person is just too much. At first, they seem interesting to talk to, but now, you can’t get them off your back!
And it gets worse if you give them your number. But don’t worry, we have your back with a few ways out of this situation. [Read: How to not be annoying and be everyone’s best friend]
Now, we know you don’t want to be rude, and you don’t actually have to be rude for someone to understand that you want them to leave you alone. But, at the same time, sometimes you need to be stern. The point is, regardless of how you do it, it’s uncomfortable.
How to tell someone to leave you alone
Here are a few great ways to tell someone to leave you alone without making them feel… well… annoying and clingy. Because eventually, you have to tell them in whichever way they’re willing to hear it. [Read: Things people hate about other people – 15 annoying truths we know]
1. Walk away
Just walk away. You don’t need to waste your time standing there uncomfortably. Say you need to go. Then leave. Now, if you’re at a party, you’ll probably run into them again, but just smile and walk by or leave the party.
There will be others. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do, remember that. [Read: 12 ways to ignore someone who mentally stresses you]
2. Tell them directly
If you’re not confrontational, this may be slightly awkward and uncomfortable for you, but it’s the most efficient way to get rid of someone you don’t want hanging around you.
You just tell them you’re not interested in them or that you want space to yourself. You probably cringed when reading that, but you need to do it. See, you can say it in a polite manner, you just need to be firm. [Read: How to be mean to people without turning into a mean person]
3. Cut communication
If you texted them or even replied to their texts or calls, stop. Stop all communication with them. If you continue, you have no one else to blame but yourself.
So, stop all contact with them. Let them know why you’ve stopped talking to them if you want, but the point is to stop. [Read: How to get someone to stop texting you – A step by step guide]
4. Block them from social media
This is more for them than for you. Blocking them from social media allows them some time literally away from you. Out of sight, out of mind, right? That’s the goal here.
So, if you have them on Facebook or Instagram, remove them. They don’t need any encouragement. [Read: When and how to end a friendship if they’re toxic and holding you back]
5. Leave no doors open
Leave no doors of opportunity for them. Don’t flirt with them, don’t say that you’ll see them later, or that you want to be friends.
You need to cut the relationship you have with them, regardless of how long you’ve known them. Just cut it. If not, they try to find a way to crawl back to you. [Read: 20 signs you’re a people pleaser and don’t know it]
6. Don’t gossip about them
It’s best not to talk poorly about them to other people, especially if they’re mutual friends. If you want to tell someone to leave you alone, leave them alone even indirectly.
The worst thing you can do is gossip about them and have them find out about it. You want them to move on from you, not become resentful.
7. Get support from friends and family
You need to let people know that there’s someone who’s not leaving you alone. If you’re at a party and you have someone clinging to you, let your friends know. They’ll be able to help you out.
If it becomes worse, then let your family know. True, it’s a little awkward to tell your parents someone isn’t leaving you alone, but you need the support. They are there for you.
8. Don’t hang out where they are
You probably always go to that cafe on the corner of your street, but it’s time to pick a new place if that’s also their regular spot.
Now, you can go back after a couple of weeks or months, but it’s best, for now, to give this person a break from seeing you so that they have time to move on. You want them to move on, right? [Read: 10 creep guy types you need to avoid talking to]
9. Use the ‘in a relationship’ card
We hate using this card because we like to think we handle things on our own. Plus it is pretty annoying that people don’t respect what you want but respect that you are taken. But that is a conversation for another time.
Every now and then, to tell someone to leave you alone you may need to pull the ‘I’m in a relationship’ card out. Most people will leave you alone after this. If they know you’re unavailable, they’re more likely to move on. [Read: 18 serious warning signs of a clingy guy and how to avoid them]
10. Be empathetic
The best way to tell someone to leave you alone is to understand why they won’t. Be empathetic towards them and take some time in understanding what their infatuation is with you. Then you let them down easily.
It’s easy to say “f*ck off” to someone, but you’re not sure what the reaction will be. If you let them down nice and easy, it’ll be easier for you in the long run, plus you won’t feel so terrible about yourself. [Read: How to reject someone nicely and make sure you don’t lead them on]
11. Contact the police
So, you’ve tried every tool you have. You’ve been empathetic, you’ve told them politely to leave you alone, but nothing’s working. Your safety is most important, so if this person isn’t listening to your demands, screw them.
It’s time to get the police involved. You’re not feeling safe and you obviously can’t get rid of this person by yourself. Call the police. [Read: 12 surefire ways to get a creepy guy to leave you alone]
12. Don’t become violent
Though you may need to send an effective message, violence is never the answer. The last thing you need is to be arrested for assaulting the creep that won’t leave you alone.
Also, don’t tell someone else to go and tell them for you either – whether you’re violent to them or someone else is violent on your behalf, it’s still not right.
How to tell someone to leave you alone over text
With life being what it is today, most stalking takes place online. Whether it is cyberstalking or they won’t stop texting you, learning how to tell someone to leave you alone over text can sometimes be difficult.
In-person, you can be stern and avoid them. Via text, they can just keep reaching out until you need to change your number. The good news is that you don’t actually have to face them, and in some ways, that can be easier. [Read: Signs of a stalker – 11 glaring clues you need to watch out for]
13. Tell them to stop
This sounds easier than it is, but try to think about it. Telling someone to leave you alone over text means you don’t have to deal with the tears or sad looks. Just say you aren’t interested in carrying on communicating with them.
14. Ghost them
Honestly, ghosting is painful and one of the cruelest things you can do. It is so disrespectful. But if you have already told them you want to stop talking and they won’t respect your wishes or your privacy, by all means, shut it down. [Read: How to ghost someone when you’ve never ghosted anyone before]
15. Be robotic
This is something that is almost always going to work and you don’t even have to block them. Send them a text with these words: SERVICE ERROR 305: DELIVERY FAILED, FURTHER MESSAGES WILL BE CHARGED AT A RATE OF $1 PER MESSAGE TO YOUR ACCOUNT.
16. Block them
It just has to be done. Go to your settings and block their number. This way, they can reach out all they want but you don’t have to deal with them. [Read: Power trip – Is the psychology of blocking someone about your ego?]
17. Report them
Report them to your phone company, the police, and be sure to let trusted people in your life know what is going on. You may not get much help from the authorities if it is just annoying texts, but making a report means something is on the record in case things get worse.
Know when things become serious
You might think it’s nothing more than just someone who doesn’t know when to stop and doesn’t mean anything by it. But, know that even the most harmless of people may start out that way and if their interest takes a turn for the sinister, it becomes serious and malicious. If you’re ever uncomfortable or feel threatened, report it immediately.
Far too many people joke about stalking and make light of it. But it’s not an amusing subject at all. This is something that can be extremely dangerous and harrowing for the person being stalked. Never simply shrug it off and assume that it’s going to be fine if your gut tells you something is off. [Read: How to get rid of a stalker – 14 steps to banish them for good]
But, also know that not every person who sends you a few irritating messages is going to turn into a stalker. Listen to your gut and know the difference.
[Read: Ghosting a friend – 10 scenarios when it’s completely okay to ghost them]
So, now you have the tools for how to tell someone to leave you alone. The next time someone is all over you and you’re about to suffocate, just tell them one of these lines. If that doesn’t work, you’ll have to show some teeth.