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13 Easy Ways to Avoid Falling in Love with Someone

how to avoid falling in love

Find yourself falling uncontrollably in love with the wrong person?! Use these 13 ways to avoid falling in love if you surely know it’s wrong for you!

When you start to like someone, you don’t actually fall in love with them instantly.

The feeling you experience is infatuation.

And infatuation, as much as it feels like an inescapable wall that blocks your view from everything else, will eventually fade.

Most of us who have a crush on someone end up falling more in love with each passing day, not because we’re so helplessly drawn towards than person, but because we voluntarily choose to let that person sink their hooks deeper into our heart.

Falling in love and its confusions

Sometimes, it’s easy to be confused. A friend or a coworker could be charming and sweet, and before you know it, you may be having an emotional affair with them, or worse, falling head over heels in love with them even though every molecule in your body could be screaming out that you’re going down the wrong path.

And then you try to stop yourself, but each time you try, it only hurts you more.

[Read: 19 sure signs of falling in love to watch out for!]

And finally, you choose to give up fighting, and wallow in self pity and misery because you’re in love with someone who’s just so wrong for you, or someone who may never ever love you back the way you love them.

But the truth is, you’re still the one who’s in control of your own life and your own heart. You can choose to walk away from love instead of falling deep in it if you truly choose to. [Read: How to get your crush to notice you and like you back in no time!]

Step #1 Is it such a bad idea?

So you’ve made up your mind that falling in love with a particular person, be it a friend or a colleague, is a bad idea.

But what’s your real motive behind walking away. If you want to get over someone and have their hooks loosened from your heart, you need to be very clear about why you choose to let go.

Weigh the pros and the cons. Do you think a long term relationship is impossible? Is there something about this person that just isn’t acceptable by you? Are they dating someone else, or perhaps, already married with kids?

If you want to avoid falling in love with someone, or want to stop loving someone, you need to be very clear about the reasons behind why you’re doing it. [Read: Am I really in love? – 21 clear signs to decode that fuzzy feeling]

Step #2 Acceptance

You can stop loving someone or avoid falling in love with someone only when you truly accept your reasoning behind why you can’t ever see a future with this particular person. You have to remember that there are no two ways here, and there should be no space for doubt.

If you want to stop falling in love with someone, you can’t ever do it unless you make up your mind that it is what you want.

You can choose to control your emotions to a certain extent, at least until your mind realizes just what a bad idea falling in love with this person could turn out to be. But you can’t do any of that unless you accept and believe the idea that you don’t want to stay in love with this person. [Read: How men really fall in love – The 7 stages of love for men]

Step #3 Stop digging your own ditch

You’ve decided to move on, haven’t you? So why do you spend half your day dreaming about this person or wondering what they may be doing right this moment? Remember, the more you think of someone, the more they start to feel like a bigger and inescapable part of your life. [Read: 20 real reasons why someone may never ever like you back!]

Each time this person flits through your thoughts, push them away. Shake your head, distract yourself and think about something else or someone else. It may seem hard for a few days or a week or so. But very soon, you’d find it really easy to just block this person out of your head! [Read: 10 steps to get over a crush and have fun doing it]

13 tips to stop yourself from falling in love with someone

If you’re having a hard time stopping yourself from falling more madly in love with this person, here are 13 tips you can use to prevent yourself from falling further in love with them. And within a couple of weeks of following these tips, you’d be strong enough to pull your thoughts together and walk away from them for good.

#1 Distract yourself. Don’t let this person control your mind. As difficult as it may seem to stop thinking of this person, it’s definitely doable. Keep yourself distracted with new activities that need your attention. And each time you feel lonely or idle, think about something else that makes you happy.

#2 Don’t be a stalker. As satisfying as it feels to stay updated on this person’s private life, avoid opening their facebook page every one hour to see if they’ve been up to something. The more you obsess over this person, the bigger the part they’ll play in your life. Try to limit the number of times you stalk them on social media every day, so that eventually you can start to completely ignore them. [Read: The truth behind limerence – Is it a crush or is it limerence?]

#3 Don’t be a people pleaser. It’s alright to turn down a request or be rude to this person now and then. If you know this person particularly well and they ask you to spend time together frequently, learn to turn them down once in a while. Remember, you’re trying to heal here, and the more time you spend with them, the bigger and deeper your wound would get. [Read: 20 signs you’re a people pleaser and don’t even know it!]

#4 Don’t get too friendly. Avoid long conversations with this person. And most importantly, completely avoid late night texts or phone calls where both of you share intimate details of each other’s lives. You have to remember that in this case, you aren’t getting friendlier with this person, you’re falling deeper in love and that’s not good at all.

#5 The bad side. Every one of us has flaws. And one of the best ways to get over someone you love is by constantly focusing on their bad side and picking their flaws. Each time you meet this guy or girl or when you remember them, remember their bad side or the things they say that hurt you. It’ll work a lot better if you could even make a list of reasons behind why you need to stop loving this person, and look at it now and then. [Read: The easiest way to get over someone is by hating them]

#6 Avoid getting physically intimate. You may feel like you’re floating on the clouds each time you cuddle up with them or hold their hands. But the moment you walk away from them, you’d come crashing down to the ground. Even if it feels like a stupid thing to do, avoid cozying up with this person. It will do you no good. [Read: 10 casual relationship rules to keep it just casual]

#7 Focus on someone else. Sometimes, the easiest way to get over someone is by getting under someone else. If you’re having a really hard time distracting yourself from the one you love, try to divert your attention to someone else.

It could be a rebound relationship or a bit of flirty banter for a few days. Sometimes, flirting with someone else is by far, the easiest and the most fun way to stop yourself from falling head over heels in love with a particular person. [Read: How to have a no strings attached relationship for a few days]

#8 Distance yourself from them. This can be particularly painful, especially if you’re working with them or are forced to interact with them on a daily basis. But as difficult as this may be, try to avoid them or keep your distance from them.

#9 Ignore or avoid the attention. Even if you’re in a stable relationship with someone, flirty attention from someone you fancy or place in high regard can always make you weak in the knees. So if you’re not ready for anything serious or if you want to avoid falling in love with them, avoid the attention at every instance even if it feels good! [Read: 18 secret signs you may be having an emotional affair right now!]

#10 Realize the difference. There’s a difference between falling in love with someone, and finding someone attractive and interesting. Just because you think a guy or a girl is attractive, fun or really wonderful doesn’t mean you love them.

Perhaps, you’ve just assumed that what you feel is love when it could just be admiration. After all, there is nothing wrong in thinking a particular person is wonderful, and there’s no rule that forces you to fall in love with everyone who seems wonderful. For all you know, the happy feeling you experience when you meet this person could just be admiration for them, and not necessarily love.

#11 Your self-respect. There’s a reason behind why you want to stop yourself from falling in love with this person. And in all probability, it’s a convincing and real reason. So why are you stooping down, behaving like an idiot and losing your self-respect over someone who isn’t good enough for you? You’re worthy of a much better lover and a much better experience from love, and you need to keep that in mind. [Read: The real reason behind why love hurts so much when it goes bad]

#12 Convince yourself. Wait it out. Infatuation stays alive for only as long as you feed it, with thoughts, emotions and fantasies. If you’ve truly made up your mind that you can’t, or don’t want to, see a future with this person, it’s only a matter of time before the feeling of infatuation starts to disappear.

#13 Talk to this person. Does this person know you like them, but don’t want to fall for them? If all else fails, talk to this person and tell them just how you feel. And ask this person to help you get over them. Avoid each other and use the no contact rule. It’ll hurt like crazy for a week or two, but beyond that point, almost suddenly, you’ll start to feel a lot better and more in control of your own life. [Read: 12 reasons why the no contact rule always works!]

Falling in love is the easiest thing to do, but backing away from it can be extremely painful and slow. But if you use these steps and 13 tips to avoid falling in love with someone to the tee, your recovery from heartache and pain would be a lot faster. And a lot easier too!

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Morgan Miller
Morgan Miller
Morgan Miller is a writer who lives in the Bay area, and suffers from an addiction to all things geeky and artsy. She loves wearing leggings as pants, and when ...
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DISCUSSION

20 thoughts on “13 Easy Ways to Avoid Falling in Love with Someone”

  1. Adrian says:

    The no contact rule worked the best for me. I deleted the girls number and never looked at any of her social media stuff again. It was extremely difficult but now I’m over her.

  2. ichick says:

    god damn, I can

  3. Aaaagh says:

    I keep falling for the same girl, and it’s killing me. I asked her out once, and she said no and…wait for it…she asked out my f*cking best friend. Now that they have broken up, I am falling for her again, harder than ever.
    It’s really killing me, mainly because I don’t want to get over her. I want to be with her forever, and care for her, and do everything right by her. Now I have the unfortunate tasks of counselling my best friend after the break up and accepting that I will probably never be with her. Oh well, f*ck love.

  4. Leah says:

    I am on the right track….

  5. ac says:

    I’m slowly falling for my boss. And I know nothing can happen for a lot of reasons (I’m unattractive, undesirable, he has a girlfriend – the main reason, and he’s my boss.) and it’s tearing me up because when i see him or text him I’m unreasonably happy. He makes me smile and laugh and he’s ridiculous, even though he can be a dick sometimes. And when we don’t work the same day, I’m sad.
    And I don’t know why this stupid thing is happening.
    i just want to stop having feelings for him, but everytime I try he does something or says something that has my stomach flipping.

  6. G - Mentality says:

    Look you can get over the situation . Everyone has feelings for someone at one point. If its mean to be it will be everytime you think of that person think of a favorite celebrity you like. Its all mental. I like someone right now but they are not falling through. I have to realize this and be strong.

  7. stonnerson says:

    She once said she loves me as in…”goodnight n luv u!!”…a few week later she mentioned we hve a strong friendship bond n I said tht bond can turn in2 a relationship who knws?… she replied “I don’t wana know”…since then I took it as rejection and she still think we have tht “strong friendship bond”…I’m letting go of her thanx to tha tips I got…
    Goodbye to misery and hello to new life explorations… ๐Ÿ™‚

  8. lisa says:

    I’m in love with someone out of my league. He is a headboy at some prestigious private school and I’m an average(NOT EVEN EXTRAORDINARY) nerd at a private school. I’ve been bulimic, anorexic and depressed. He showed me that I was worthy and through him I gained confidence. He doesn’t like me in that way though, now that I see it and it hurts. I feel like I’m back to the low self-esteem self. I can’t even concentrate- it’s my senior year and I need to do well so I can go to a good university and not feel so inferior to the likes of him.

  9. Caleb says:

    I consider this one serious problem/situation that practically affects ones daily living. Enjoyably but unhealthy and would eventually destroy the way of living.

    I’am Falling deep everyday with a female co-worker. She’s happily married with kids, I’m also in a relationship, we’re quite good actually with my girlfriend. Well, could be best without this kind of situation.

    Now I have fully understand that I’ve been doing these 13 tips the opposite, I have all the precipices for a dish of total destruction.

    We’re friends, and I initiated us to become the best of kind for us to get closer. I believe it’s true to her, but I have additional intentions. God knows I have tried and trying just to live within the rules of friendship. I am failing every single attempt. I praying for this feeling to die, still no good.

    It’s like a drug an addiction, I feels great doing all the opposite stuff that give me happiness shortly and crushes me every time I go to bed, realizing that everything is wrong/inappropriate and would destroy as all if I persist.

    This article should serve it’s purpose on me, just in time when I’am about to crash.

    Here goes nothing…

  10. vanessa says:

    I am thinking i fell in love this days with my fellow-worker these days,yeah sometimes he talks a lot and he makes me laugh so much and others too.. but i felt something different like he’s really funny and a cheerful person,his way of talking,his face and his doings and he is so unique like he is perfect in everything….alll these things are roaming into my mind every hour…yesterday he gave me a chocolate too and i don’t know what to do???

  11. vanessa says:

    see!! i typed wrong too oh my god!! where is my mind???

  12. Jay says:

    It’s crazy how things can turn out, but Breuna I just want you too know I really do love you. you’re happiness is all I care about </3.

  13. Jay says:

    I’m sorry I meant your*.

  14. Maryam says:

    I just want it to stop! I’m too scared of being hurt and too scared of developing really strong feelings only for him to change his mind later. I’m in love with someone I hadn’t seen in years. We were coworkers who used to have a fling. I quit my job and never saw him for 5 years. Now he’s back and he makes my head buzz. He tells me how much he loves me but I don’t think he’s in love with me. I love him too but I know I’m not good enough for him. He can do better. I’m not pretty enough. He’s had way better. I don’t want to love him because he will pull away and I’ll be left heartbroken. It’s not worth it. He is priceless but I just can’t deal with that pain again. Sorry to the man of my dreams. You know who you are. I am no Shirin.

  15. Alana says:

    I find when I fall in love with a person, it becomes an obsession. And I find myself constantly thinking of them… No contact did no work in my case as it had a little bit more to do with my psychology than anything else, but there have been cases where keeping my distance from someone who I feel i’m falling in love with too fast.
    Sometimes it’s good to realize you’re chasing something from the belief that they don’t want you back, so it’s like wanting what you can’t have…
    It’s good to not reject them, but accept both parts like, why you love them and why you always look them up, and why you think it’s okay to do this, and then an acknowledgement of the part of you that says why you don’t want to do this. And having both thoughts sit comfortably with you is what helped me bring me out of it.

  16. Meh says:

    I have never loved anyone in my life, love is a word to describe an attachment nothing more.

  17. Monica Carson says:

    I very much enjoyed this information and I do plan on incorporating it into my life skills and behaviors. I’m not looking for love anymore. I had thought I found it. Well, I did. It just wasn’t ever reciprocated. Currently the love of my life is writing this post….ME <3
    Thank you to the writer. Magnificent! ( ;

  18. Sammie says:

    Yep, I totally try to avoid Facebook stalking a guy I’m kind of into. It’s so easy to think romantic thoughts about someone if you’re constantly looking at their pics and reading their wall. When I stop myself from doing this, then I don’t as quickly fall in love with someone and can start thinking more realistically about them. It doesn’t work often though lol. If I’m into someone, then I’m into someone. I can’t apologize for love.

  19. The derp says:

    Good info but sadly, not what im looking for. I want to stay close freinds with sonebody i have a crush on but i know (for private reasons) that i will neer be with them. Is their any way i could reasonably give myself the “i think we should be friends speech” so i stop drooling over them but can stay reasonable

  20. Girish Mulye says:

    I was in love with her.But something is holding her back to say .So I stopped talking to her.And great I feel relaxed.I don’t expect her to talk to me either.If she talks to me it takes me back to loving phase.I blocked her no.so that I don’t want to go back again after I deciding never to see her again.

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