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46 Shallow Traits of a Superficial Person Who’ll Only Use & Discard You

A superficial person doesn’t care about feelings or thoughts, they’re all about how they look. Do you know a shallow person?

shallow person superficial people

A superficial person is all about the surface. That means they couldn’t care less about what is going on underneath. Shallow people care about one person only – themselves.

Of course, you can guess that this type of person is not much fun to be around. You can’t really rely on them too much – a superficial person isn’t going to be your lifesaver, your emergency contact, or the person you contact if you ever need anything.

A relationship with them is all about what you can provide for them. 

Everyone can be superficial on occasion. It’s normal for a human being. However, some people are just superficial all of the time, and it’s draining to be around them. Learn the traits and signs of superficial people and know when to step away for your own sanity! [Read: Shallow people lack depth: 30 Signs you swim in the shallow end]

What is shallow/superficial?

Shallow or superficial basically means the same thing.

They’re used to describe people that don’t have any depth. They have an absence of feeling, social awareness, and no empathy. So wrapped up in their own self-imposed drama, they don’t see what is right in front of their face—the rest of the world.

In a shallow person’s world, the world revolves around them. Yet, there are different levels of shallow and it could be that someone is shallow or superficial some of the time, and not all of it. [Read: 13 avoidable habits that will change your life for the worse]

We’re about to talk about common trademarks of shallow people, but it’s a good idea to sit down and have a good look at yourself. We’re all shallow occasionally, and that’s nothing to be concerned about, but if you exhibit several signs on a regular basis, you may need to pull it back a little.

Why not ask someone close to you and get them to give you their honest opinion? Self-discovery is never a bad thing and it helps us to improve and grow. [Read: How to improve yourself: 16 powerful secrets of self-improvement]

46 trademarks of a shallow or superficial person

The only person who doesn’t recognize when someone is shallow is the person who is shallow. So, heads up, here are the signs someone around you is a superficial person and probably doesn’t know it.

1. They complain about people not doing what they say they’re going to do, even if they have a very good reason

If they don’t care about the reason why things inconvenience them but only that they do, then they’re probably shallow. After all, sometimes things are more important than them! [Read: Why don’t people like you? The 20 most common reasons]

2. They are annoyed when someone has a problem that messes up their day

If their day is the only thing that matters, guess what, they’re a shallow person.

Maybe they ought to check themselves when they’re annoyed because someone’s misfortune or hectic schedule isn’t convenient for them.

3. Nothing is ever their fault

People are just way too sensitive – that’s exactly how superficial people see the world. The truth is, shallow people think they only affect themselves.

News flash, if you haven’t heard of the butterfly effect, it’s time to read up. What people do hurts and affects others, and they need to grow the hell up. [Read: 15 mature ways to grow up and behave like an adult]

4. They judge people by what they do, what they wear, or how they talk

People have more to offer than the amount they spend trying to cover their shitty insides by making their outsides shine.

Superficial people need to stop judging people by what they choose, or better yet, what they can afford, and think a little more about what they add to the scheme of life. The clothes they wear are gone in a season, the imprint we make in life lasts for eternity. [Read: The biggest lessons to deal with judgmental people]

5. The light is on, but no-one is home

Yep, shallow people pretend to be all in, but they really never give anything of themselves at all. A blank slate is a blank slate, especially if it has no interest in being impressed upon.

6. Anything real makes them uncomfortable

It isn’t that they need to be all in every deep conversation, but if they can’t ever join in anything that isn’t surface, guess what? That makes them one of the shallow people in the world. [Read: No friends? Uncomfortable reasons your life’s how it is]

7. Not only is “sorry, I can’t” one of their go-to terms, but it dominates their response to anything that doesn’t benefit them

It isn’t that people who have depth are “yes” people, it’s just that if you are someone who cares about someone more than just you, then helping others when they need it is just a part of your humanity.

If someone can never pitch in, roll up their sleeves, or give your time to something that might not benefit them, then you should consider the possibility that they are a shallow person. [Read: Do you understand and embody the 15 good qualities of a person?]

8. They have several plans for the night and pick the best one, leaving everyone else in the lurch

For sure, there are always better plans right after you make some. But, that is a part of life and also a part of the ebb and flow.

To have good friends, you have to be a good friend. A superficial person don’t think of that. They always do what’s best for them, and to hell with the rest. [Read: Got flaky friends? Here are all the reasons why you MUST ditch them]

9. Whenever there is a problem, they’re busy and can’t be bothered

If something doesn’t touch them, it doesn’t touch them. A shallow person just doesn’t see anything beyond themselves, so when a friend or even a family member needs their help, they’re likely to suddenly become very busy indeed.

10. They’re never going to be someone’s emergency contact – emergencies are a huge inconvenience to them

Who likes drama or emergencies *well, besides a drama queen who isn’t inconvenienced by it*. [Read: Drama queen alert! The steps to calmly deal with the diva]

If they can’t ever be bothered by what is going on in someone else’s world, they not only lack empathy but they’re also part of the superficial people crew.

11. Their true love is money, power, or status, no matter who it is attached to

If they are a ten attached to a two because they have money, power, or status, and treat them insignificantly while they treat them like they are the most significant human in the world, then shame on their shallow ass! [Read: The sneaky signs of a genuine 24K gold digger]

12. They’re always “busy” like the rest of us aren’t!

Yep, they can’t answer a text message, reply, or RSVP because they are way too busy, way more so than the rest of us… really? Nope, they are shallow and self-important.

It takes a fraction of a second to reply to someone, let’s get real. Why are they so important? Nope, they’re just shallow.

13. Their allegiance goes to the highest bidder

Friendships, relationships, whatever, it is all based on “What can you do for me?” philosophy. Superficial people only allow people into their inner circle when they benefit them. Once that benefit is gone, they’re out. [Read: Selfish people – 20 ways to spot and stop them]

14. They can never pick which selfie is your favorite

Do you know someone who thinks that everyone gives a shit about what they eat or the selfies they’re constantly taking? Are they always on Instagram or Snapchat, trying to “engage” with their followers? They need to get over their love affair with themselves – that is just downright shallow.

15. They buy things only if they are a named brand

No one knows or cares. Here’s a little secret — regular department stores sell the same shit. [Read: Attention seeker – The signs you’re one even if you can’t see it]

16. Gossip is their favorite way to pass the time

If they prefer to deal in nonsense that doesn’t matter instead of real-life hardships or things that do, they’re shallow, end of!

17. Their favorite date is their phone

Hey jerk, put down your self-phone and social media shit for a minute and join the rest of us! That’s what you feel like shouting!

Basically, superficial people are so self-absorbed they have no clue that they’re being downright rude by always being on their phones. [Read: How to wean yourself off social media and learn to detox]

18. Every story they tell is twisted in their favor

Yep, they NEVER do anything wrong, just for the record, they are always right and also for the record, their moral standing stands taller than anyone else’s. Noted.

But, just so you know, shallow people believe they are the hero in every story too.

19. Their friends are status symbols, not real people

If they choose their friends because they make a beautiful Instagram picture, we don’t need to say anything. You know they’re shallow, but do they? Probably not.

20. They believe that your character doesn’t define you, your size does

If they buy clothes they don’t even like just to say they fit into a size two… that is shallow. Nobody cares about size, people care about personality and kindness. Maybe that’s a lesson they need to learn. [Read: Why is inner beauty more important than outer?]

21. What, there are issues more important than first world problems?

No way! We know, whatever sucks in their life is the worst ever. They should figure out that there are people around the world who are being shot, starved, or mistreated, and instead, they go with the ‘poor me, I didn’t get my latte this morning’ route.

Shallow! [Read: How to develop empathy and master the art of growing a real heart]

22. #thestruggle

Yep. It’s real. Poor them.

23. No one has ever seen them without makeup and lived to tell the tale

If they can’t let anyone see the real them, then they are shallow enough to think people care that much about what is on the outside and don’t care about what is on the inside.

24. They have to be the center of attention, and if not, they make it so

Yes, shallow people have to find drama when they can. Otherwise, they have nothing to talk about. If they have to be the center of attention, let them. A flash in the pan rarely shines for long. [Read: Attention whore – 16 signs you’re an insufferable attention seeker]

25. They use people

This is a general “Everyone has a purpose or no purpose” type of ideation. If they look around and only have people in their lives who can do things for them, such as fix things for them, or buy things for them, but not a sincere friend, that spells SHALLOW PEOPLE and won’t lead to a happy ending.

26. They lack empathy

If they think that everything that goes wrong with someone is their fault, then maybe they should start considering how everyone affects one another—including them.

Maybe, just maybe, not everyone has been as privileged as their shallow behind.

27. They’re always in the market for something they perceive to be better

Whether it is friends or love interests, they are always ready to trade up. Since it is all about how they look to other people, what they have to offer, and what they get out of it, people are just disposable, right?

28. They go where the wind blows

Yep, a superficial person doesn’t have an opinion or conviction that can’t be swayed, convinced out of, or just eradicated without much pressure.

A superficial person can’t be bothered with caring about a “cause” or anything that really exists outside of them. [Read: 17 ways to be a citizen of the world while living at home]

29. They smile when talking but look you up and down

The emotion they display doesn’t necessarily match what they think. A good “Bless your heart,” and they are all good to rip you to shreds the moment you aren’t within ear’s distance.

30. They have nothing to add to, well, anything

You know when you have a conversation? There is something called “adding a little.” That is not anything that a superficial person ever does.

They don’t even listen to what you have to say because they don’t care what you have to say. They probably just like watching your lips move. [Read: How to be classy – 20 traits that command awe and respect]

31. Their social media persona is the only one that exists

There is a social media persona that people create, and then there is the real person who is about a tenth of the intensity of the persona created.

If their social media persona and the person they are outside of it are the same, they might not be genuine, which makes them superficial.

32. They chat it up, but when it is your turn to talk, they tune out

A conversational narcissist has all the makings of a superficial person. The only interesting thing they find are those things that involve them.

If you start talking to a superficial person, they hijack the conversation, so it always comes back to “me.” [Read: Are you a conversation narcissist?]

33. They date someone to increase their status, not because they like or even know them

A superficial person dates someone just to up their own status. It makes no difference if there is a connection or sexual attraction. If you can move me up the social ladder, I’m all yours!

34. They are all about the backhanded compliment and probably don’t even know it

Superficial people have absolutely no self-awareness, so a backhanded compliment is about as nice as they get. If they have something nice to say, it always has to be followed by something to squash you. [Read: Backhanded compliment – How to react kindly or give back in kind]

35. You unfollow them to stop your phone from going off every two minutes with an update

A superficial person believes that the world revolves around them. Therefore, they assume you want to see what they are having for lunch, what they are doing at all times, and want to know every second what their status is.

36. Your problems irritate them

A problem is likely met with an eye roll and a signal that says “you waste my time with your insignificant problem.” [Read: 17 bad friends you should unfriend from your life]

37. If you aren’t cool anymore, you’re a ghost

If you can’t further a superficial person, don’t be surprised if they ghost you or can’t be bothered being your friend anymore.

38. You introduce yourself to them like 100 times

Why would they take the time to commit your name and face to memory? You aren’t important, but in your defense, no one is.

39. They don’t have a laugh that is the same twice

Not even their laugh is real.

40. They tell you things like “you know what you should do” or “why don’t you just …”

Yep, they have the answers for everything, and it is always, “You aren’t as smart as me, so figure it out.”

41. They never bring, they just expect you to pay

“Oops, did I forget my wallet again? I gotcha next time…”

42. Thank you isn’t in their vocabulary. They’re entitled, don’t you know?

They don’t see a need to say “thank you” because they aren’t grateful for anything. In their head, they are entitled. Just give them what they deserve – no thank you. [Read: Feeling unappreciated? 31 unappreciated quotes to empower you]

43. Everything you do is okay, whatever they do is amazing

Yep, a superficial person thinks they are the center of the universe, so everything they do is amazing.

Whatever you do is mediocre at best. You might have just got the best job in the world, but it still won’t match up to whatever they’ve done that day.

44. They never have a problem and everything in their life is awesome, all day, every day 

Superficial people have the most wonderful life, beautiful spouse, wonderful kids, and the nicest everything. They are unable to admit they aren’t perfect and neither is their world.

Nope, every day for a superficial person is simply awesome. Apparently.

45. Everything they do has a purpose, and we mean everything 

If they do something for you, you better mark it down. That means that you owe them in some way, shape, or form. [Read: Manipulative people: How to spot them and stop playing the victim]

46. They not only have to talk themselves up, but if they have kids, they’re a one-man promotional band

Being superficial doesn’t stop with just them, it emanates to everything they own, have, or produce, including the kids. They have to be just as superficial as them. They can’t go anywhere without dressing their children like they just walked out of the latest catalog, that screams “I am superficial.”

Sidestep superficial or shallow people at all costs!

Superficial people are just as the name describes. They keep everything surface. Don’t ever expect someone who is superficial to care as much about you as you do the least important person in your life. The only person that exists in a superficial person’s life is them.

[Read: How to be a good friend – The friend code all BFFs must follow]

In the end, shallow people are the only ones who care about themselves, which is a really sad place to be.

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Preeti Tewari Serai
Preeti Serai
Preeti, the founder of LovePanky, is an eternal optimist and believer in the beauty of love and life. With an exhaustive experience in love, relationships, and ...