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Shallow People Lack Depth: 30 Signs You Swim in the Shallow End

Are you a shallow person? You probably don’t think so, but how do you know? Shallow people often only care about themselves, but that’s only one sign.

Shallow People

There is nothing worse than a shallow person. When I lost my husband, I started listening. I mean truly listening for the first time to what people bitch and complain about. Don’t get me wrong, I complain about the most superficial and silly things that there is on earth. But shallow people just don’t get it in general. [Read: Superficial person alert: 36 shallow traits they just can’t hide]

We all have times when we think that something is a huge deal when it is a fraction of what the least stressed person in life is going through, but shallow people don’t get it. They don’t get that they have it all, and all they do is bitch about what they don’t have.

What is shallow, and how can you tell if you’re a shallow person?

What is shallow? Well, I suppose it is people that don’t have any depth. They have an absence of feeling, social awareness, and no empathy. So wrapped up in their own self-imposed drama, they don’t see what is right in front of their face—the rest of the world. In a shallow person’s world, there is only one person who exists. Yet, there are different levels of shallow and it could be that someone is shallow some of the time, and not all of it. [Read: 13 Avoidable habits that will change your life for the worse]

Nobody wants to think about their shortcomings, but we all have them. You may be someone who just has a very slight amount of the shallow about them. Or, you could be someone who is very shallow but doesn’t see it. Now, I’m not suggesting that you’re a shallow person per se, but it doesn’t hurt to know what to look for, so you can rectify any problems before they arise.

We’re about to talk about common trademarks of shallow people, but it’s a good idea to sit down and have a good look at yourself. We’re all shallow occasionally and that’s nothing to be concerned about, but if you exhibit several signs on a regular basis, you may need to pull it back a little. Why not ask someone close to you and get them to give you their honest opinion? Self-discovery is never a bad thing and it helps us to improve and grow. [Read: How to improve yourself: 16 powerful secrets of self-improvement]

30 Trademarks of shallow people

The only person who doesn’t recognize when someone is shallow is the person who is shallow. So, heads up, here are the signs you are a shallow person and don’t even know it.

1. You complain about people not doing what they say they’re going to do, even if they have a very good reason

If you don’t care about the reason why things inconvenience you but only that they do, then you are probably shallow. It helps to take a step back and consider other people might have a life too. Sometimes things are more important than your ass. [Read: Why don’t people like you? The 20 most common reasons]

2. You are annoyed when someone has a problem that messes up your day

If your day is the only thing that matters, guess what, it isn’t your day.

God didn’t create the world around you, and things don’t happen with your consideration in check. Maybe you ought to check yourself when annoyed because someone’s misfortune or hectic schedule isn’t convenient for you.

3. Nothing is ever your fault

People are just way too sensitive. If you think what you said was taken wrong or someone is way too sensitive, think again. Shallow people think they only affect themselves.

News flash, if you haven’t heard of the butterfly effect either watch “13 reasons” or get a clue. What you do hurts and affects others, so grow the hell up. [Read: 15 mature ways to grow up an behave like an adult]

You judge people by what they do, what they wear, or how they talk

Hey Valley Girl (yes, 80s reference), people have more to offer than the amount they spend trying to cover their shitty insides by making their outsides shine.

How about you stop judging people by what they choose, or better yet, what they can afford, and think a little more about what they add to the scheme of life. The clothes they wear are gone in a season, the imprint you make in life lasts for eternity. [Read: 5 Lessons to deal with judgmental people]

5. You never have an opinion about anything, which makes you think you’re morally superior

Never taking a side doesn’t make you nonjudgmental, it just makes you a coward. It is okay to be confrontational and stand up for what you believe in. After all, if you don’t ever stand up for anything or have any convictions, what do you have?

Never taking a side doesn’t make you morally superior, it means you don’t have the courage to say what you think and stand behind it.

6. The light is on, but no-one is home

Yep, shallow people pretend to be all in, but they really never give anything of themselves at all. A blank slate is a blank slate, especially if it has no interest in being impressed upon.

7. Anything real makes you uncomfortable

It isn’t that you need to be all in every deep conversation, but if you can’t ever join in anything that isn’t surface, guess what? That makes you one of the shallow people. [Read: No friends? Uncomfortable reasons your life’s how it is]

8. So, you vacate the moment anything become serious

For God’s sakes, stop dodging life and take part. It really isn’t bad to be real and serious. I get the whole don’t dive in the shallow end, but sometimes, just sometimes, you have to go to the deep end with the rest of us.

9. Not only is “sorry, I can’t” one of your go-to terms, but it dominates your response to anything that doesn’t benefit you

It isn’t that people who have depth are “yes, men” it is just that if you are someone who cares about someone more than just you, then helping others when they need it is just a part of your humanity.

If you can’t ever pitch in, roll up your sleeves, or give your time to something that might not benefit you, then you should consider the possibility that you are someone people call shallow people. [Read: Do you understand and embody the 15 good qualities of a person?]

10. You have several plans for the night and pick the best one, leaving everyone else in the lurch

I know, I get it. There are always better plans right after you make some. But, that is a part of life and also a part of the ebb and flow.

To have good friends, you have to be a good friend. If you want to be shallow and always do what’s best for you, good luck. You won’t ever find true in anyone else either. [Read: How to become a better person – 9 golden rules to evolve every day]

11. Whenever there is a problem you are busy and can’t be bothered

If something doesn’t touch you, it doesn’t touch you. I get it, but you miss it. A shallow person just doesn’t see anything beyond themselves, so when a friend or even a family member needs your help, you’re likely to suddenly become very busy indeed.

12. You’re never going to be someone’s emergency contact, emergencies are a huge inconvenience to you

Who likes drama or emergencies *well, besides a drama queen who isn’t inconvenienced by it*. [Read: Drama queen alert! 12 Steps to calmly deal with the diva]

If you can’t ever be bothered by what is going on in someone else’s world, you just might be shallow enough to think that anyone gives more shit about you. The fact is, they probably pretend, but maybe you should try pretending a little yourself.

13. Your true love is money, power, or status, no matter who it is attached to

If you are a ten attached to a two because they have money, power, or status, and treat them insignificantly while they treat you like you are the most significant human in the world, then shame on your shallow ass! [Read: 10 sneaky signs of a genuine 24K gold digger]

14. You’re always “busy”, like the rest of us aren’t!

Yep, can’t ever answer a text message, reply, or RSVP, you are way too busy, way more so than the rest of us… really? Nope, you are shallow and self-important.

It takes a fraction of a second to reply to someone, get the fuck real. Why are you so important? Think about how you make other people feel for once in your shallow life.

15. Your allegiance goes to the highest bidder

Friendships, relationships, whatever, it is all based on “What can you do for me?” philosophy. [Read: Selfish people – 15 ways to spot and stop them]

16. You can never pick which selfie is your favorite

If you are someone who thinks that everyone gives a shit about what you eat, you stand in front of God knows what on a daily basis, or just hang out with your Snapchat backgrounds and can’t decide which one you love the best, get over your love affair with yourself, that is just friggin’ shallow.

17. You buy things only if they are a named brand

No one knows or cares. Here’s a little secret—Target sells the same shit. [Read: Attention seeker – 12 signs you’re one even if you can’t see it]

18. Gossip is your favorite way to pass the time

If you prefer to deal in nonsense that doesn’t matter instead of real life hardships or things that do, you’re shallow, end of!.

19. Your favorite date is your phone

Hey jerk, put down your self-phone and social media shit for a minute and join the rest of us or don’t. Maybe, just maybe, you do us all a favor by being in a class all your own. [Read: Social media detox: 13 Ways to wean yourself off social media]

20. Every story you tell is twisted in your favor

Yep, you NEVER do anything wrong, just for the record, you are always right and also for the record, your moral standing stands taller than anyone else. Noted. But, just so you know, shallow people believe they are the hero in every story too.

21. Your friends are a status symbol, not real people

If you choose your friends because they make a beautiful Instagram picture, I need not say anything. You know you are shallow, but in your defense, so are the other characters in your perfect picture.

22. Your character doesn’t define you, your size does

If you buy clothes that you don’t even like just to say you fit into a size two… that is shallow. You are the only one who is concerned or cares about what your size says, but hey, that is on you… [Read: Why is inner beauty more important than outer?]

23. You raise money to go on mission trips and see them as a free vacay

I hope you don’t do this one, but it’s a sign of a shallow person, for sure. I have nothing but “oh good grief.” Pretending to care about a cause is worse than not caring at all, you shallow person, you.

24. What, there are issues more important than first world nation problems?

No way! I know, whatever sucks in your life is the worst ever. Hey, don’t do this. Figure out that there are people around the world who are being shot, starved, or mistreated, you go with the poor me I didn’t get my latte this morning. That totally works for you! [Read: How to develop empathy and master the art of growing a real heart]

25. #thestruggle

Yep. It’s real. Poor you.

26. No one has ever seen you without makeup and lived to tell the tale

If you can’t let anyone see the real you, then you are shallow enough to think people care that much about what is on the outside and don’t care about what is on the inside.

27. You have to be the center of attention, and if not, you make it so

Yes, shallow people have to find drama when they can. Otherwise, they have nothing to talk about. If you have to be the center of attention, have it. But, there isn’t anything lasting about a flash in the pan. [Read: Attention whore – 16 signs you’re an insufferable attention seeker]

28. You use people

This is a general “Everyone has a purpose or no purpose” type of ideation. If you look around and only have people in your life who can do things for you, fix things for you, or buy things for you, but not a sincere friend, that spells SHALLOW PEOPLE and won’t lead to a happy ending

29. You lack empathy

If you think that everything that goes wrong with someone is their fault, then maybe you should start considering how everyone affects one another—including you. Maybe, just maybe, not everyone has been as privileged as your shallow behind. [Read: 17 ways to be a citizen of the world]

30. You’re always in the market for something you perceive to be better

Whether it is friends or love interests, you are always ready to trade up. Since it is all about how you look to other people, what they have to offer, and what you get out of it, people are just disposable, right?

The definition of shallow is not deep. So, it would make sense if someone is shallow, they are only surface. The reason people stay surface, don’t ever dive deep, or investigate what is underneath, is because they are fine with their sheltered and simple life.

We can ALL be shallow people at times, but if that is the way you guide your life, then the worst news is how you miss out on the best parts. You aren’t hurting anyone but yourself by not caring about anyone but you.

[Read: How to be a good friend – The friend code all BFFs must follow]

In the end, the shallow people are the only ones who care about themselves, which is a really sad place to be.

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Julie Keating

A writer isn’t born, but created out of experiences. No lack of subject matter, my life reads more like fiction than anything that could have been imagined...

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