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How to Stop Fighting Over Money in a Relationship

how to stop fighting over money

Find out how you can stop fighting over money in a relationship, and start saving money instead. Ask yourself these six questions that can help you change your lives for the better.

Click here to read the introduction: Newlyweds and Money Management

Sit down with your partner while reading this, or send this feature across to your partner so they too can understand these pointers.

If you’re already experiencing the symptoms of a money squabble, here are some thoughts that would definitely make a difference in your lives.

Six Questions to Help You Stop Fighting with your Partner

Q1. After you’ve purchased something, is it the purchase or your relationship that holds more value to you?

In a happy relationship, both of you have an equal say, and any amount of money you earn does not enable you to enjoy more power in your relationship.

Nor does that mean you can buy what you want, whether your partner likes it or not.

Q2. Do you really need to buy that?

Whenever you want to buy something, ask yourself if you really need it, and can’t do without it. And then ask your partner about it, and rationalize.

If both of you are comfortable with the thought of making that purchase, go ahead. If not, read Q1 again!

Q3. Are you a spendthrift?

Be truthful here, because lying will not help anyone. Do you love spending money because it makes you feel good, or better than the people around you? Have you done anything to deal with the issue?

If you’re a spendthrift then gradually cut down your expenses to a moderate level. But if you find that you still can’t come to terms with each other’s views, it would be better to reassess your relationship.

Q4. Do you get abusive when your partner points out your excessive purchases?

It is always easier to curse the darkness than to light a candle. It is easier to abuse than to try and listen. Start listening and do not yell. Stay calm and put forth your view on issues in a clear manner. No amount of anger will ease the situation.

Get involved in issues together and sort the differences, but don’t ever get repetitive on your partner’s flaws.

Q5. Have both of you set goals on your money and expenditure levels?

It is your goals that should guide your expense. Set realistic goals and pursue them together. This will reduce your arguments.

Q5. Have you started making changes?

It might not be easy at first to reduce your expenses and stop fighting over money. But you will soon be able to sort out all your differences, and appreciate and respect each other’s opinions when it comes to making purchases. You could, of course, set aside a certain amount of money to spend on small luxuries now and then, as long as it’s feasible.

Q6. Are both of you participating equally in trying to stop fighting over money?

Equal participation is the key to a happy future. Whether it is in setting goals or for analyzing your budget, never burden your partner with too much responsibility or take all of it away from them. It is important for both of you to take decisions together and share the responsibilities.

Involve your partner in every decision and help them involve themselves. Make your partner feel wanted. Shunning one partner’s view on purchases and money management will only create a bigger rift between both of you.

It’s easy to point fingers and argue with your partner, but it really can be easier to stop fighting over money in a relationship and start saving money if both of you try to understand each other.

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4 thoughts on “How to Stop Fighting Over Money in a Relationship”

  1. think of it says:

    Fighting over money is one of the most petty things you could do in a relationship. I mean, come on now, guys. There are lots more important thing to think about and worry about other than money. Sure, you need money to pay your rent, but is the money problem worth losing your relationship for. I just think losing your relationship or breaking up over money is ridiculous and stupid at the same time. I mean it’s crazy, are you that shallow to break up because you have money issues with your partner? There are far more different categories of reasons why you would break up with your partner or at least lessen the quality of your relationship but money just isn’t worth the fighting. This is in my own opinion and if you think differently, let me know by commenting below, we may have a lot to talk about and that’s more worth than fighting over money. We will not be fighting over money, of course, we’ll be arguing about how petty money is to be fighting over with. It just doesn’t make sense. Okay, I know you would be in a whole different on this topic but you have to admit that I have some great points written down, or typed down in this case. I know a lot of couples who are financially broken down, file for a divorce. I mean, really? Instead of finding a solution to solve your money problems, you add more money problems? Divorce is expensive, Any other person who tells you other wise is stupid. Don’t listen to them. More problems would arise because the kids would be compromised as well. Couples are just stupid and they take their kids for granted just because they had money problems. The thing is a lot of couple divorce over the stupidest reason, like this one couple I knew, his wife filed a divorce because he snores. What’s up with that? But nevertheless, I think that’s a more valid excuse than divorcing over money issues.

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