Home  >  My Life  >  A Better Life

How to Start a New Life: Steps to Leave Toxicity Behind

Have you found yourself at a crossroads and you want to know how to start a new life? Great news! Amazing opportunities are out there waiting for you. 

how to start a new life

Not everything in life is great. We’ve all established that by now. That being said, sometimes, things can get so bad you want to escape. And that means you have to figure out how to start a new life and forget everything holding you back.

But, it’s not easy.

In fact, you’ll have to work at it for a while, but it’s definitely possible to move on from toxicity and start over fresh. You can even make a point to rid your life of everyone and everything that messed it up in the first place.

Changes will always be scary, but it’s sometimes necessary when nothing in your life is turning out for the better. [Read: How to start over and win – Keys to finding your second chance]

Why it’s never too late to start over

There are plenty of people who will say you shouldn’t just start over; you should try to correct your life as-is before jumping ship. But the thing is, you’re not just giving up because you want to learn how to start a new life. If anything, you’re persevering through all the turmoil in order to find something better on the other side.

Having a fresh start actually takes a lot more courage and strength than most people assume. It’s easier to stick to the familiar route and attempt to change your life.

This doesn’t mean you erase every single thing from your past, and it doesn’t mean you’re ignoring it either. It means you’re figuring out what you want, what you need, and how to bring that to the forefront while letting everything else fade into the background.

And it’s never too late to learn how to start over. It doesn’t matter what your age is or how far into a specific career you are. There is no time limit on choosing the life you really want. [Read: How to get a life – 20 things you must do to feel alive again]

Why do you want to start over?

Before you learn how to start a new life, you need to identify the reasons for wanting one in the first place. Is it someone or something you want to move away from? Is it a job or a social situation?

Work out what you don’t want and that will make designing your new life much easier.

Because that’s what you’re doing, in effect. When you learn how to start over, you’re identifying what you’re unhappy with and erasing it completely. In its place, you plant new seeds to grow the life you really want.

It’s redesigning in many ways and that’s never a bad thing. [Read: How to feel better about life – 16 small steps to feel great again]

What does starting a new life do?

Many people are held back by the idea of change and entering uncharted territory. But that’s precisely why you need to learn how to start a life. You’ll thank yourself for doing this in the long run, especially when you manage to turn things around for the better.

When you’re stuck in a rut and there’s no way of getting yourself out, starting anew can significantly help. Most importantly, this can help you discover who you are and what you want when you’ve been so confused about what direction and path you really want to go.

Even if the thought of starting a new life seems scary, it will change your life. It changes your perspective, drops your old baggage, gives you hope and light, and can even provide you with the sense of purpose and direction you’re looking for. [Read: New relationship advice to have a perfect start]

The best places to disappear and start over

Once you’ve decided that you’re going to start over, you have to think about whether that involves a change of location. If it does, where should you go?

Well, the options are endless! There are no right or wrong places to go; it really depends on what you want and the types of places that call out to you.

If you’re bored in your current life and maybe you live somewhere quiet, why not try a large city for size? You might find the fast pace a fresh of breath air. Or vice versa; if you live in a busy city, maybe switching to the countryside could give you the peace and serenity you crave.

Think about how you want your new life to look and then shortlist places that can help make that plan a reality. [Read: 15 reasons why you should travel at least once a year]

How to start a new life of health and happiness

Just like anything else that involves negativity and toxicity, it’ll take time to get through. You have to stick with it if you really want a fresh start. These tips will help you redesign your life:

1. Make a list of what you want

Sometimes it helps to sit down and list what you want in life. It can be anything. You can write about what you’d like to look like and even how you’d like to see the world.

Having something to work off of can serve as a basis for moving forward. If you’re serious about learning how to start a new life, it’s essential to have at least an idea of what you want. Envision the kind of life you’d be happy with and take it from there. [Read: The need for purpose in life – 5 things it can do for you]

2. Make a list of everything standing in your way, including your fears

Now that you have that list of what you want, write down everything that’s preventing you from having that life already. It can be people, a job, or even your mindset. Jot down every little thing you’ll have to change in order to get from where you are now to where you want to be.

There are likely to be some factors standing in your way. Maybe it’s your finances, or maybe it’s your own fear. Whatever it is, write it all down. This helps you gain perspective on everything. [Read: Signs your past relationship is holding you back from a better future]

3. Make a list of people you need to get rid of

Often, we struggle in life because of the people we surround ourselves with. If you have toxic people bringing you down or even insulting the life you want, you have to get rid of them.

It might be hard but it’ll be the best thing you can do for yourself if you want to start a new life. You need to have the courage to let go of these people, no matter how uncomfortable or scary it might feel. [Read: How to break up with a friend – The respectable steps you must follow]

4. Visualize your new life

And even envision it. It’s easy to write down a list of what you want, but it’s another to think about that realistically and discover if any of it is attainable. Most of the time, it is. It takes some hard imagining in order to develop hope for what it’ll look like.

If there’s a central theme for how to start a new life, it’s knowing what you want and what you envision your life to be. So if you have a vision for your life, balance practicality and passion. List down the realistic ones to achieve but are things you really want for yourself. [Read: Life questions to help you visualize your future]

5. Set goals that can help you start over

Now it’s time for the challenging part: making goals. Never underestimate the power of goals in turning your life around.

Maybe the reason you feel stuck or in a dark place is because of the lack of goals, which is precisely why you need to create plans. They don’t have to be life-altering, but you can start with something small and build your way up.

This is hard because doing this makes it real. And often, goals are intimidating. So write down those goals *weekly, monthly and yearly goals* and work toward achieving them every day. [Read: How to manifest love and happiness in your life – The steps you need to follow]

6. Work on bringing more positivity into your life

This will change your life the most. The more positivity you have in your life, the better it’ll be. You can transform the way you see the world if you work hard on training your brain to be positive. You won’t know how to start a new life if you never bring any positivity into the one you already have.

Whether it’s practicing gratitude or even changing your approach, you need to at least try to be positive. Granted, it’s easier said than done, but it really is necessary to create this habit. [Read: How to think positive and reprogram your mind to stay positive]

7. Accept what happened in the past

Before you can ever move forward, you have to acknowledge the past and accept it. No matter how bad it is, you can’t move forward unless you accept that it happened and you can no longer change the past.

What you can change is how you respond moving forward. [Read: Achieving self-acceptance – Little steps to take for one big change]

8. Commit to moving on from the toxicity

Many people want to change their lives, but so few do because they don’t commit to it. They’ll make all the changes they want for a week and then fall back into their old habits. Commit, and you’ll see how great your life can be.

Make sure it’s what you really want and have the persistence and dedication to do so. Again, change is scary, but you need to commit to making your life better. [Read: How to focus on yourself – 27 powerful ways to create your own sunshine]

9. Meet new people

This will really make a big difference and help you feel like you’re starting a new life. Go out and about and meet new people. Surround yourself with people who have the type of life you want, and you’ll find it easier to achieve your goals.

You can’t just stick to the same group of people you know, you have to expand your circle and socialize with others. Otherwise, you’ll be stuck in the same patterns as before. [Read: How to meet new people and find a new crowd]

10. Start new hobbies

Or even rediscover old ones. Get back to your roots and find out what you’re passionate about. Bring some of that passion back into your life, and it’ll feel like a whole new life to you.

This is your chance to try new things and explore different activities. Try taking a dance class or maybe learn how to play the guitar. There are endless possibilities, so don’t be afraid to try something new!

11. Kick nasty habits

Smoking, chewing your nails, negative thinking, not washing your face at night, the list goes on. Get rid of any bad habit, no matter how small. If you work on fostering good habits, your life will be renewed.

Maybe that’s making your bed, working out, or even as simple as waking up early. [Read: Avoidable habits that will change your life for the worse]

12. Hit the gym more

This isn’t about how you look; it’s about how you feel. You need to get in shape and give your body what it needs. The more you move, the better you’ll feel.

The best thing about exercise is that helps you be more productive, motivated, and gives you the energy to lead a happy and positive life. Even if you’re not a gym person, just exercise and move your body as much as you can. [Read: Faux pas that makes you look like a jerk at the gym]

13. Change your diet

Just like moving around and exercising will make you feel better, so will eating good healthy food. We’re supposed to fill our bodies with real food, and making this dietary switch can help you feel better, which will make you think more positively and see the world in a brighter light.

Stop eating junk food and basically every food that’s harmful to your body. Sure, you can eat it every now and then, but don’t make a habit of it. For a week, just try reaching for some fruit rather than a chocolate bar whenever you feel peckish, and marvel at how much better and energized you feel at the end of the week! [Read: Nothing makes me happy – How to make happiness your default state of mind]

14. Find balance

If you’re serious about learning how to start a new life and enjoy it, find balance in your life. And by that, we mean learning how to have fun while also maintaining your goals.

A balanced life is a sane life, and THAT is the goal. Remember, too much of something will drive you insane and cause you stress. So instead of working too much or resting too much, find the balance that satiates every part of your life. [Read: How to balance your career, social life, and dating life]

15. Change location if you have to

Not everyone can start a new life where they are. Sometimes there are just too many reminders of a more challenging time. If this is you, then move.

Find a new city and get a new job where you can be the person you truly want to be. It’s a challenge if you’ve lived in your hometown your entire life, but a new place also means a fresh start.

It’s your best chance of leaving everything behind, including all the toxicity and drama. [Read: Fun ways you can start over in a brand new city]

16. Always learn something new

Is your job going well, but you feel like your career is… empty? If you feel stuck at work or bored with your day-to-day, look for new ways to do things. If it means that you have to go through training to learn the skills needed for a new job, even better!

Most of us don’t have the time or money to go to college and take classes. But there are many good things about online universities, they are nationally recognized and cheaper than in-classroom education.

Make sure that you sign up for some online classes that collaborate with your work schedule so that you don’t have to stop your life to get ahead. [Read: 17 happy things you need for a perfectly happy life]

17. Challenge comfort zones

Getting out of your comfort zone can help you break out of a life of stagnation.

Challenging your comfort zone is meant to help you see what you can do when you’re put to the test and will help you learn how to start a new life. After putting in so much effort to get there, it’s normal to want to take a break. But, there comes a point in your life when you have to step up your game again.

Set your goals and go for them. For example, if you have always wanted to run a marathon, set up a strict training plan to help you get there.

This lesson will teach you how to push through the pain and anxiety blocks that have kept you from being a champion. You deserve to live your most extraordinary life, so go deep inside yourself and discover where your hard ceiling is. [Read: Powerful steps to break out of your comfort zone]

18. Manifest goodness

If you’re thinking of starting over or changing your life, you’ll need to know what you want the new version of your life to look like. Would you like to spend more time with your family, or would you instead concentrate on your career?

Making a vision board may help you materialize the positive in your life. Reading periodicals and newspapers about people, places, and things that inspire you may be eye-opening. Words you didn’t previously associate with yourself may now be appealing.

Silly? No. Consider making vision boards with friends or family to determine whether their opinions matter in your future goals. Friends and relatives may sometimes function as mirrors for us. Seeing their astonishment at your many interests may lead you to reconsider or intensify your efforts.

And keep returning to the board to remind yourself of your goals. It’s common for predictions to evolve. Every year, a new vision board may help you concentrate and fine-tune your aspirations as you grow as a person. [Read: How to follow your dreams and all the amazing reasons why it’s worth it]

19. Take ownership

It is easy to move through life as if you were a passenger. The good news is that you don’t have to give up anything in your life to get back in charge of it.

Take control of one part of your life so that you can own it. And start with one small part of your daily life. Instead of relying on someone else, try to fix it yourself – it could be making breakfast, a cup of coffee, walking to work instead of depending on public transport, or anything just as trivial or big.

The best way to free yourself from being passive is to become the captain of your ship. Every time you take ownership of your life, you’ll start to feel more in control, and less like the passenger. And isn’t that what life is really all about? [Read: How to let go of your past and be excited by your future]

20. Maintain a meaningful social circle

A common proverb is that “you are what you surround yourself with.” New and interesting people might be the spice in your life that you’ve been looking for.

Consider your personal and professional connections as a whole. Make a mental list of the relationships that help you the most and why. Check out that list the next time you’re attending a social event and bring it along.

Strike up a conversation with people who fit into these boxes. If you want to know how to start a new life, remember it’s about fixing and changing every part that holds you back. And that includes the people that surround you as well. [Read: Quick tips to add more people to your social circle]

21. You won’t be able to quit life, only change it

You can’t quit life, but you can make your life different. That’s what you should be thinking about. If you want to start over, you can, but only from this point on.

Know that your past will still exist, but you’ve accepted it and learned the lessons. If you want to learn how to start over, you need to understand that some parts of your old life will still exist. [Read: How to make yourself happy: 20 habits of incredibly happy people]

22. Actually make the changes

It’s one thing to talk about changing your life and another to actually do it. You need to follow through and make changes in your life. They can be small ones, but the point is, you make them.

It’s no good talking about things and making plans if you don’t actually put them into action. You’ll only look back and wish you’d had the bravery to try.

Start with small steps and eventually, with time, you’ll start making bigger decisions, ones that could really change the shape of your life. [Read: Insightful lessons to help you have a better life]

23. Follow a motto

This is especially important when you’re trying to figure out how to start over and stay motivated day after day. Pick a motto; pick one that speaks to you and stick to it. Have it taped to your bathroom mirror, your fridge, or anywhere where you’ll see it often.

This motto will be your support when you feel vulnerable and think about giving up. [Read: Mantras to live by that will transform your life]

24. Accept that you know nothing

Your ego is going to want to control you and make you think that you know everything. You don’t. In fact, you know nothing, so get over it.

You think you know yourself, other people, and the world around you, but just wait until you freak out about this life change. You’re going to encounter people, emotions, and situations completely new to you.

Be ready for it. [Read: What’s the key to happiness? Truths to unlocking a great life]

25. Be ready for the moments when you want to give up

You’re going to want to give up. No matter what the change is, you’re going to want to say, f*ck it, and go home.

Your old life was comfortable, we know, but your new life will be even better. You just have to get over this moment of vulnerability.

26. Reward yourself

Reward yourself for your accomplishments. If not, you won’t see the joy in starting over. If you stop drinking soda and lose five pounds, reward yourself with a massage or a good book.

Show yourself that the change you make is for the positive. Thus, you need to treat yourself every now and then. [Read: How to be yourself – 26 steps to un-fake your life and love being you]

27. Trust your gut

Your gut instinct never lies. If you feel that going out tonight may prompt you to make some bad decisions, then don’t go. If you feel, deep inside, that you won’t be able to say no, avoid the situation.

Your gut knows you better than you do, it’s your raw inner self. Listen to it. [Read: 15 things everyone should know about how to live a happy life]

28. Assess your budget

Starting a new life often requires you to have a little cash. Not always, but often. If that’s the case, look at your finances and make a budget.

Work out what you can realistically afford, start a savings plan, and then create milestones along the way. That’s a far better approach than getting into debt.

29. Get a fresh perspective

Talk to someone you trust about your plans. That doesn’t mean you should allow them to influence your decision if you’re sure in your gut that it’s right for you. But it does mean that you should listen to their viewpoint and consider it.

A fresh perspective can often help you to work out small problems and find a way around them. [Read: How to focus on yourself: 17 ways to create your own sunshine]

30. Apologize to people from your past

Before you move on to your new life, be sure to get closure on anything that happened in the past. That also means giving other people closure by apologizing for things that caused them pain.

You can do this in person or by a letter, but never do it by text. That’s just cowardly and won’t give you the closure you crave. By doing so, you have a clean slate on which to build your new life. [Read: How to find closure with yourself after a relationship]

Is it time to start over?

Starting a new life can often be scary because you really don’t know what to expect. This is a huge change in your life, but you’ll never transform your life into something better if you constantly stay within your comfort zone.

If you’re truly dissatisfied with where you are right now, have the bravery to dream big. Don’t be reckless, but instead put a plan together to help you get where you need to be in a safe and secure way.

You’ll never regret it.

[Read: 19 life quotes to motivate you to live a better life]

Figuring out how to start a new life when you’ve been through some hard times isn’t easy. However, these steps can help make the transition easier and give you the insight you need to start fresh.

Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.

LovePanky icon
Team LovePanky
The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...