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How to Sober Up Fast: 15 Quick Ways to Go from Sloshed to Alert

You’re rushing towards work in the morning, feeling groggy, and you desperately want to know how to sober up fast. Keep reading to find the answers.

how to sober up fast

You could be wasted off your ass right now, trying to figure out how to sober up fast. Look, there’s nothing even remotely wrong with partying and getting blackout drunk, especially if you’re celebrating someone or just want to de-stress.

However, you’re also an adult, which means loads of responsibilities. The good news is that there are ways you can sober up immediately that don’t result in your job or sanity getting affected.

Why do you need to sober up fast?

Knowing how to sober up fast comes really handy when you’re desperate to have it all together because of a meeting or presentation you have to attend. We all have our moments to unwind and relax. But we also have our moments where we take it too far and forget about our responsibilities altogether.

If this is the case, you’ll be thankful for reading this feature in sobering up fast. You don’t have to call in sick for work or be late to that meeting, resulting in your boss reprimanding you. Being sober immediately really isn’t as impossible as you think.

How to sober up fast

We’ve all been there when one beer turns into five or six, and you’re figuring out how you’re supposed to go to work tomorrow or not even that, how you’re going to get home. It’s all a part of this thing we live in called life.

Do you regret getting drunk? Of course not, you had an amazing time, but now, your conscience is kicking in and giving you a small lecture on how bad of an idea this was. Okay, well, you can un-drunk yourself. And because of that, here’s what you need to do to sober yourself up as quickly as possible.

1. Time cures all

Get as much sleep as you can because time is really the only thing that can sober you up. Even if it’s a short nap you can take while on the commute going to work, then take it.

Anyone who’s ever been hungover will tell you that sleeping is the best cure for sobriety. However, if you cannot rest, below are the other things you can do to speed up the process. [Read: 20 ways to bring back the spark when you’re super bored with life]

2. Eat something fatty

There’s nothing like eating a cheeseburger and fries when you’re drunk *which is why McDonald’s is a drunk person’s favorite place to go.* The intoxication in your body reduces when you eat a lot of fatty and greasy food, so now’s not the time to go on that diet.

Forget your calories and eat that burger or any fatty food for that matter. You want that grease to coat your stomach so that it slows the absorption rate of the alcohol. In times like these, grease is king. [Read: Sabotaging your happiness – 12 ways you could be ruining your own life]

3. Hydrate yourself

Alcohol is a very dehydrating thing to drink, so if you really want to know how to sober up fast, we highly suggest hydrating yourself with lots and lots of water. If you’ve been downing shot after shot without anything in between, well, you’re going to get really wasted.

Alcohol depletes the electrolytes in your body, so you need to make sure that you sustain your electrolyte levels. Unless you’re going for a hangover, then we suggest drinking up! It doesn’t matter if you keep peeing – you do want to be sober fast, right? Then this is a sacrifice you’ll have to make.

4. Throw up

This isn’t my first suggestion when it comes to knowing how to sober up fast, but for many people, it helps. Of course, it doesn’t reduce the alcohol that’s already in our bloodstream, but if you just took five shots in a row and realize that’s a bad idea, throw it up now.

If you’re feeling sick in the morning and only feeling the alcohol now, run to the restroom and throw it all up. If you want to save your sobriety, don’t keep it all in.

5. Caffeine

Okay, there’s a little misconception about caffeine. Many people believe that coffee will sober you up, however, that’s not the case. You’ll still be drunk whether you drink that cup of coffee or not, however, it will make you feel more alert.

When you’re drinking, though, it’s not that good of an idea to mix alcohol and caffeine. You’ll be stuck drunk without the inability to sleep but if you want to risk it, then go ahead. But this isn’t an experience we would wish on anyone. [Read: 12 ways to finally start living for yourself]

6. Stop drinking

This should be pretty obvious but if you want to know how to sober up fast, then stop drinking immediately. For every one drink you have, it takes approximately one hour for it to be processed in your body.

So, if you keep drinking, you’re going to keep adding on the hours until you’ll be sober. If you don’t want to risk your career because of that meeting you have in the morning, then stop taking those tequila shots.

7. Activate your liver

With all the alcohol floating in your body right now, you’re going to need your liver in tip-top shape. So, try taking some milk thistle. It’s a natural herb which detoxifies the liver and keeps it functioning.

This isn’t something a lot of drunk people know but trust us, you’ll be thanking us in the long run. It’ll make you feel much better, especially when rushing feeling sober.

8. Get a little cardio in

This is a classic when you’re asking how to sober up fast. If you’re already drunk, you’re probably not going to do a 10k run, and I don’t blame you. But, I suggest you to try to go on a walk at least. Doing a little bit of cardio is the best way to feel better about your intoxication.

Obviously, don’t go running intensely when you still have a hangover, but take it lightly. Doing cardio actually helps to increase blood flow to the liver which results in your blood detoxifying faster. [Read: The benefits of exercise on your brain and body]

9. Load up on vitamins

Now, you don’t have to swallow a handful of vitamins but you should at the very least make yourself a smoothie… alcohol-free. All that alcohol you drank deprived your body of a lot of vitamins and nutrients, which is also why you feel weaker when drunk.

Use ginger, carrots, apples, mint, oranges–fruits high in vitamin C and antioxidants. Now’s not the time to complain. If you want to know how to sober up fast, drink that smoothie!

10. Carb it up

Carbs slow down the absorption of alcohol in the body and lower the ratio of alcohol in your bloodstream. In other words, eat that baguette because carbs are good. Carbs are your best friend when drunk! Not to mention, they taste a hundred percent better when intoxicated *we don’t know why either; they just do.*

If you want to sober up fast, this isn’t the time to reject carbs into your body. You’re also going to need all that energy for your meeting or whatever your plans are.

11. Don’t drink carbonated beverages

Here’s a fun fact: carbonated beverages that contain alcohol actually quicken the absorption of alcohol in your body. So for those who like using sodas as a chaser for hard liquor, then you’re in real trouble. It’s best to stick to water if you really must use a chaser after your shots.

So, if you’re trying to set a pace for yourself, stay away from anything carbonated such as champagne, mixed drinks with soda in it, or beer. [Read: What your favorite drink says about you]

12. Showering doesn’t work

While showering can refreshen your body and mind, it doesn’t exactly work in sobering you up. Listen, throwing yourself into an ice cold shower will do one of two things: make you feel more alert or put your body in shock. We’re sorry to debunk this myth, but a cold shower in the morning isn’t the way on how to sober up fast.

If it was, then a lot of people wouldn’t be showing up late for work or calling in sick. Don’t take a shower, it won’t help you unless you want a warm one right before going to bed, for the sake of comfort. [Read: What to talk about when you’re drunk on a date]

13. Take a pain reliever

It’s common to have the worst headache of your life, especially when dealing with a hangover. You’ll need painkillers for this, given that you’re persistent in going to work despite your intoxication.

Drink lots of water as mentioned above, and take a painkiller when your headache becomes too much to bear. It’s not going to sober you up for long, but it can aid as a temporary fix just to get you through the day. [Read: 12 simple, effective ways to cure that pesky hangover]

14. Get fresh air

We know exactly how tough it is to get out of bed in the morning when you’re drunk, but you need to get that fresh air. If you really want to know how to sober up fast, get that fresh air and try walking, similar to one of the points above. This change of environment can benefit your sobriety even just a little bit.

15. Making love

I know, I know. You’re probably thinking why this is on this list, but there’s a perfectly logical explanation for this. When you make love with someone, endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin enter your body. [Read: What is dopamine? The dopest pleasure pill inside of you]

These are otherwise known as the feel-good hormones. Research suggests that this can help prevent alcohol from entering your bloodstream entirely.

So, how to sober up fast?

With these 15 tips above, hopefully, we’ve helped you on recovering from your intoxication. While drinking certainly is fun and will give you a night to remember, it’s important to learn how to sober up when your career is on the line.

So, what are you waiting for? These are all the ways on how to sober up fast at your disposal. Use these to your advantage in sobering up right away.

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Natasha Ivanovic
Natasha Ivanovic is an intimacy, dating, and relationship writer best known for her writings on Kiiroo, LovePanky, Post Pravda, and more. She's the creator and ...
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