Women say they love mysterious men, and though it may be true, the mystery doesn’t last forever. Women end up going for the guy who makes them laugh. Because, sure, the mystery is exciting, but it fades when you get to know the person. What really sticks around is personality, especially one that knows all the right kinds of funny things to text a girl.
So, ditch the mysterious vibes because, at the end of the day, jokes will win her heart. That being said, some guys don’t think they have what it takes to make women laugh. And, that makes sense.
It can be nerve-wracking to make someone laugh, especially if you’re not sure if you’re funny. But everyone has a sense of humor.
Laughter is the best route to any girl’s heart. We’ve all heard that saying, but different people find different things funny. But it doesn’t hurt to have some funny things to say to a girl over text regardless of how corny they may seem.
They can be used to ease into a comfortable conversation flow or just to get her attention. All of these funny things will come in handy too, even when you are on a dating app.
[Read: 12 types of humor and how they each affect relationships]
Some people have dry humor, others are more expressive—so don’t feel pressure to be funny. You are funny, just understand the type of humor you possess. It may not necessarily match her sense of humor, and that’s okay. Not everyone is the same, which is what makes things interesting.
Regardless, make the first step and crack a couple of funny lines to see where things are, and what her sense of humor is like. [Read: How to be a funny guy – All the secrets you need to know]
Let’s make her laugh… or at least smirk with these. First, we’ll start with some funny pick-up lines to text a girl.
1. Nothing is luckier than the dress that’s on your body.
[Read: How to keep a girl interested – 13 exciting ways to keep her happy]
2. Girl, give me my heart back because you stole it when I first laid eyes on you.
3. Is it hot in here or are you just raising the temperature?
[Read: Make them swoon – 20 swoon-worthy romantic words]
4. Are they casting for Wonder Woman? Because I have the perfect person for the role.
5. Do you feel guilty about global warming? Because your hotness is melting the world.
6. I’m sorry I acted awkward when I first saw you. I guess I’m suffering from seeing too much beauty.
7. Are you gonna kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary?
8. Was that an earthquake or did you just shake my world?
9. I’m addicted to ‘Yes’, and I’m allergic to ‘No.’ So, what’s it gonna be?
10. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I pass by you again?
[Read: 70 hilarious cheesy pickup lines to get any girl laughing]
11. I’m not a professional, but I’m pretty sure we would look amazing together in a photo.
12. I think I need CPR after seeing your face.
13. My job is secure. No one else wants it.
14. Girl, I know what you did this summer. Wanna do something similar this winter/fall/spring?
15. Do you have a Band-Aid? I hurt my knee falling for you.
16. You better direct that beauty to somewhere else or else I’ll lose my mind.
17. My doctors said that I can never have an arrhythmia. But talking to you proves them wrong.
18. My phone isn’t working well, can you put your number on it? Maybe it’ll start working then.
[Read: How to make someone laugh over text just by being yourself]
19. I’m sorry I wasn’t part of your past, can I make it up by being in your future?
20. Is your dad, Liam Neeson? Because I’m Taken with you.
21. If grapes make skin beautiful, then you must be living in a vineyard.
22. You’re so stunning I just forgot my pick-up line.
23. If you were Christmas, I would be the Grinch who stole you.
24. Seriously? It’s got to be illegal to look that good.
[Read: 100 sweet things to say to a girl and make her heart soar]
25. Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.
26. I don’t play chess, but you’re definitely my queen.
27. Am I cute enough yet, or do you need more of these vodkas?
28. I sure hope, girl, that you know CPR because you make my heart skip a beat.
29. Girl, will you stop getting any hotter? You are killing the poor thermometer!
30. You must go and see a doctor, girl! Because you have ‘BEAUTY’ all over your face!
31. Girl, you are like dandruff because I cannot get you out of my head.
[Read: How to make someone laugh over text – 18 secrets fun texters know]
32. Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten, I see!
33. I have a crush on your mind, I fell for your personality, and your looks are just a big bonus.
34. Wait a minute. Why did it take you so long to enter my life? I’m angry.
35. Your dad must have been a thief because he stole all the stars in the sky and put them in your eyes!
36. I have had an awful day, and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?
[Read: 38 Ways to start a conversation over text and make each text fun to reply to]
If you don’t think she would laugh at a cheesy pickup line being texted to her, then you can try sending some of these corny jokes to make her burst into laughter.
1. What do runners eat before a race? Nothing, they fast!
2. Do you want to hear a joke about construction? Never mind, I’m still working on it!
3. What do you call a dog magician? A Labracadabrador!
4. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone? He had no body to go with him.
[Read: 53 flirty things to say to a girl to compliment her and make her blush]
5. What did one shark say to the other while eating a clownfish? Well, this tastes a little funny.
6. What do you call a pony with a cough? A little hoarse.
7. What did the little boat say to the yacht? Can I interest you in a little row-mance?
8. What did the guy with the broken leg say to his nurse? “I’ve got a crutch on you.”
9. What do you call two birds in love? Tweet-hearts!
10. What do you call someone with a rubber toe? Roberto.
[Read: 22 ways to make a girl think about you with texts and how you behave]
11. Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe.
12. What do you call a factory that only markets passable products? A satisfactory!
13. Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef? He’ll dessert you!
14. What does the ghost call his true love? My ghoul-friend.
15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pauline. Pauline, who? I think I’m Pauline in love with you.
[Read: How to make a girl smile – 50 things you can do to make her happy]
If you’re more into giving out puns, then here are some for you to choose from.
1. How would you reply if I said: “you deserve better”? I don’t know about you, but I would say: “you read my mind”!
2. Hey. Do you like Star Wars by any chance? Because Yoda only one for me!
3. What do you think you would be named if you were a burger at Mcdonalds? I know! McGorgeous.
4. Do you want to know what I’m in the mood for right now? Pizza. Well, more like a pizza you.
5. How much money does a pirate pay for corn? A buccaneer.
[Read: How often should you text a girl? 24 must-know rules of texting]
6. Are you sure you’re not a chicken? Because I don’t know about anyone else, but to me, you look impeccable. *I’m-peck-able*
7. Do you know why seagulls fly over the sea? Well, they can’t fly over the bay! Then they would be bagels.
If you are looking for other things beyond pickup lines, jokes, and puns, then here are some other more general – yet funny – things to text a girl.
1. I hate when I’m about to hug someone really sexy and my face hits the mirror.
2. I’ve been getting wrinkles from smiling so much.
[Read: How to be funny – 28 must-know tips to make everyone love your humor]
3. Stop being too sweet! You’re driving me insane.
4. Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces.
5. Never kiss a police officer, she will say, hands up. Never kiss a doctor, she will say, next, please. Always kiss a teacher, she will say, repeat it five times.
6. Love is like peeing your pants; everyone can see it, but only you can feel it.
7. You make things hard. I like that.
[Read: Am I texting too much? 16 signs they think you’re a clingy texter]
8. Do you know what my favorite thing in the world is? The second word of this text.
9. I know staring at people for too long is considered rude. So, I wanted to ask for your permission.
10. I love you. You’re my pudding. But how come you’re not in the bakery?
11. True love is like a pillow. You can hug it when you’re in trouble, you can cry on it when you’re in pain, and you can embrace it when you’re happy. So when you need true love, buy a pillow!
12. Why do men like to fall in love at first sight? Because doing so saves them a lot of money.
13. Can I borrow a kiss from you? I promise you that I will give it back.
[Read: How to tease a girl over text and 15 ways to get her to flirt back]
14. Never laugh at your significant other’s choices because you happen to be one of them.
15. Are you familiar with that tingly feeling that you get in your body when you start to develop feelings for someone? That feeling is all of your common sense, leaving your body.
16. You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body. In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
17. The brain is the most impressive organ in our whole body. From the day you are born, it works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, right up until you fall in love.
[Read: Double texting – What it is, how to avoid it & 15 must-follow rules]
18. Love is when I walk to the other side of the classroom to sharpen my pen so that I can see you. Only to realize that I am holding a pen.
19. I may annoy you, and you might want to kill me… I permit you but on one condition. Don’t shoot me in the heart because that’s where you are!
One thing you need to remember about comedy is good timing.
You don’t need to be funny all the time to make her like you. You can also do other things like asking her the right questions to get to know her.
Just keep it lighthearted, and you will keep a girl entertained over text – and yourself too.
[Read: How to use self-deprecating humor to impress a girl]
You’ve been texting a girl you’re interested in. Now it’s time to put a smile on her face and show her your sense of humor with these funny things to text a girl.
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