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30 Things Women Look For in A Man that Makes Him Totally Irresistible

You want to know all the things women look for in a man, right? Well, look no further. We have all the answers you need to be a chick magnet.

Things Women Look For In A Man

Have you ever wondered about the things women look for in a man and desire? Maybe there’s a girl you want to impress, but you just can’t seem to catch her attention. You’ve tried everything in the book, and nothing seems to be working.

Guys seem to think girls look for things like competitiveness, cockiness, and aggression. In reality, that is not the case.

If you’re still not getting the girl you want, you’re bound to wonder what you’re doing wrong and what other lucky men are doing right. Just like there are a few things about a girl that attracts you, girls too have their own wish list for a guy they meet.

So, what do women look for in a man? One thing’s for sure – it’s more than your looks and physical appearance. You may have a dashing smile and gorgeous eyes, but that won’t suffice if she’s looking for a long-term partner.

By being open to learning more about what women want, you are already on the right path. [Read: Every girl’s weakness – What she wants and how to become it]

Before answering what things women look for in a man, consider this…

You came here for guidance and insight. And don’t worry, we’ll get there. But, before we get into what women look for in a man, we want to offer a bit of a disclaimer.

All girls are different. All girls look for different things. Some girls look for a guy with a successful career. 

Others may want someone with more free time. Some girls look for a scruffy beard and someone with calluses on their hands, but others want someone more clean-cut. [Read: What do women actually want in a man?]

You cannot lump all girls together and think that if you exude what girls look for in a guy, all girls will be attracted to you. But, by focusing on the parts of yourself that girls look for, you can get noticed by the girls that appreciate you.

You cannot take this list and change who you are to fit what girls look for. If some girls are looking for a guy who shares her religious beliefs, you can’t just start believing in God to get her to notice you.

Rather focus on the traits you already have that girls are looking for. [Read: How to feel good about yourself and kick ass in all aspects]

For example, many girls look for a guy close to their family. Be sure to talk about those relationships and maybe even introduce a new girl to your family earlier than usual.

You can improve yourself and explore new interests. But changing who you are will not get a girl’s attention. It will probably turn her off that you are not being genuine.

For instance, a girl may look for a guy who cares about his physical fitness, so taking time to balance your diet or workout could be beneficial in dating as well as the rest of your life. [Read: How to make a girl want you, desire you and think of you sexually]

But, if working out is not something you are interested in, don’t do it solely to attract a girl. Instead, join a book club if you’re an avid reader.

Being true to yourself is one of the main things girls look for in a guy.

What do women need in relationships?

More often than not, women are all about having that emotional and mental connection with someone.

They might get attracted to how you look initially, but it’s your personality, mindset, maturity, ambitions, and values that encourage them to stay and fall for you deeper. [Read: What girls find attractive – 25 traits that make you irresistible]

For instance, if a woman finds a man who has a good sense of humor or confidence, these are very attractive to a woman. 

Despite what the media shows, women are not just all about how men look – it’s beyond the physical appearance that makes them fall harder for men.

So, if you’re asking what things women are look for in a man, it’s how attractive and desirable his personality is, among other things. [Read: Turn offs for women – 25 things guys do that girl absolutely hate]

What things do women look for in a man?

Men have their own sexual preferences in women. Likewise, women too have their own preferences when it comes to appearances. 

But for everything else, there are just a few things that separate a great guy from mere mortals.

Understand these traits, and you can become a much better man and catch the eye of the girl you desire.

And honestly, you’ll notice the difference as soon as you use these tips on what women look for in a man. [Read: What attracts women to men? These are the traits you should be focusing on instead]

1. Good grooming and self-care

Another word for self-care could be hygiene. But we really shouldn’t have to say that. Of course, a girl is looking for a guy who brushes his teeth and showers regularly, but this should go beyond that.

Girls want a guy who takes care of himself like an adult. This means you clean your bathroom *or at least hire someone to*, wash your dishes, have soap and shampoo in the shower, wash your face, etc.

Dress well and look good no matter where you are. You never know when you’d bump into the woman of your dreams.

There’s just something to be said about a man who knows how to look good for himself and others. [Read: How to attract women – 41 things all girls find VERY desirable at first sight]

If he’s presentable, then it also reflects his ability to look after himself *grooming is attractive…right, ladies?* 

It doesn’t mean he should have a complete skincare routine or that he should take an hour to bathe. But he should know how to look his best and look after himself

2. Be assertive in your behavior

Women love a man who’s not fickle-minded. As hard as this may seem, be the man who can put someone else in place when they overstep the line or misbehave with you. [Read: How to be assertive – 17 calm ways to speak your mind loud and clear]

Indecisiveness and being a pushover aren’t attractive, so if you’re asking what things women are look for in a man, it’s the ability to make decisions *and stick to them*. It’s your ability to be assertive when it matters.

3. Charming personality

A charming personality is everything, but yet it’s not something most men have. In fact, meeting a guy who knows to charm a girl is a hard task for any woman. There’s a notion that in order to charm a girl, you need to be arrogant, which is the opposite of what’s true.

Improve your body language around women and learn your manners around them – that’s how you can master the art of being charming. [Read: How to charm a girl and subtle ways to make her think fondly of you]

4. A good physique

Your physical attributes aren’t everything, but it certainly helps if you’re wondering what women look for in a man. 

Go build those biceps and those deltoids in your shoulders. When your shoulders look strong and powerful, any girl would find it hard not to sneak a glance at you! 

And of course, when you work out, you look healthier and radiant, and clothes look oh-so-sexy on you too. [Read: The biggest benefits of exercise on your mind, body, and libido]

Not to mention, exercise also benefits your mental health, which affects your confidence and self-esteem. What’s sexier than a confident man?

5. Have a good sense of humor

It takes less than a minute for a girl to know if a guy has a good sense of humor while having a conversation with him. And that’s all you need to impress a girl. 

The minute you make a girl laugh, you have her hooked and can possibly make her fall in love with you. So don’t be afraid to use your humor on that girl you like! [Read: How to be funny – 28 must-know tips to make everyone love your sense of humor]

For all you know, your humor is your best chance of getting her to notice you. Have a light-hearted and fun approach towards life and try to look at the bright side all the time. 

You’ll draw women to you like moths to a flame.

6. A man who’s not a pushover

A guy who’s a pushover is one of the worst kinds of men in the hierarchy of dating. A pushover is a guy who prefers to accept defeat just to avoid conflict with someone who’s dominating him. [Read: How to not be a nice guy and go from a pushover to an achiever]

If you’re wondering what women look for in a man, it’s the ability to stand their ground and fight for their beliefs and values.

Of all the things you shouldn’t compromise, your values, beliefs, and opinions go high on that list. Have a spine and principles in life. 

If you feel you’re being wronged, learn to voice your opinion instead of being implosive. [Read: What is masculinity? 46 manly and toxic traits women love and despise in men]

7. A good job and a nice salary

Well, now we’re getting shallow. But it’s better to face the truth than pretend like money doesn’t matter. 

Of course, it does! Money certainly isn’t everything, but it plays a significant part in a relationship and your lifestyle as well.

Especially when a woman dates with the intention of long-term relationships *and eventually marriage*, then this is an essential factor. Also, it shows that a guy knows what he wants and has goals and ambitions in life. [Read: 24 Sneaky signs you’re dating a genuine 24k gold digger]

8. A man who’s respected by others

Women like to be respected by the man they like, but they also like being with a guy who’s respected by others. 

If others highly respect you, then that’s for a reason and it’s a very admirable trait in a man. If you’re wondering what things women look for in a man, respect is an essential trait.

It all comes down to this if you genuinely respect yourself and have self-respect, would you ever allow someone to throw you around for no fault of yours? [Read: Self-concept – What it is, how we create and develop it to control our life

9. A confident man

Confidence is a great trait to have for any man. It’s an inner strength that’s seen and envied by anyone you meet. Confidence is the most attractive trait of anyone, whether man or woman. 

Not to be confused with arrogance, of course, as we’re talking about the real kind of confidence here.

If a man believes in his abilities and capabilities, then that’s sexy and attractive. It means he doesn’t need external validation to prove who he is and what he can do. [Read: How to build self-confidence – 16 ways to realize you’re worth it]

10. A man who looks good

Look your best, dress well, and maintain a good posture. A straight back with an air of confidence can definitely impress the girl you like.

If you’re asking what are the things women look for in a man, it’s not so much as having the perfect attire, but looking good as a whole.

Some men don’t have the best fashion sense but manage to pull off looking good all because of their ability to display a confident and presentable front. [Read: How to be more attractive – 31 ways to play up your best features]

11. A good conversationalist

Just like a good sense of humor, knowing how to speak to a woman is a trait that all women look for in a man. It’s an attractive trait when a man knows how to talk to you – or anyone, for that matter.

When you know how to maintain a conversation *and a good one for that matter*, this is an attractive trait for the ladies. Nobody wants a bore to talk to, after all.

If you know how to really converse, then you’re fun to talk to. [Read: How to talk to a girl – 20 secrets that’ll make you irresistible to women]

12. Respectful behavior

Be respectful towards others when they deserve your respect. All good-natured women like a well-mannered and kind man who doesn’t treat others badly just because he can.

If a man can show respect for others, then he’s deserving of receiving the same amount of respect.

This means you don’t just respect her because you’re trying to impress her, but you respect everyone to cross paths with. [Read: What is chivalry? The real meaning, the Knights’ code, and modern men]

13. An alpha male

You may have noticed this already, but there are always just one or two guys in a big group of guys who date the sexiest women while other guys sit wide-eyed and hear their success stories in awe.

They’re the alpha male. Be that guy. Don’t just sit by the sidelines and wait for women to approach you. 

Take action and unleash your masculine energy, that is if you want to earn the respect of other men and the glances of women. [Read: How to be an alpha male and unleash the irresistible inner you]

14. Make her feel comfortable around you

Women like a man who makes them feel at ease within the first few minutes of a conversation. Be the guy who can take away the air of nervousness in a first conversation while talking to a woman and she’ll like you for it.

There’s such a thing as a vibe check that almost all women do when talking to a guy. If you manage to make her feel comfortable in the conversation, then you pass that test. [Read: 21 ways to instantly make any girl feel really comfortable around you]

15. A compatible personality

Here’s a downer that you have to accept when it comes to understanding what women look for in a man. You may be a great guy, but at times both of you may just be way too incompatible with each other. 

She may need a specific type of guy who complements her personality, and if that’s the case, really, it’s not your fault here.

People have different personalities, and you need to accept that sometimes your personality just doesn’t mesh with hers. That’s fine – you’ll eventually find someone compatible with you. [Read: How to think like a woman and get the girl you desire]

16. Having integrity

Integrity is one of the most respectable things a man can have as it shows that he won’t just change his opinions or beliefs because someone believes in the opposite.

Even if the majority is against him, he knows what he’ll stand for and that’s a desirable trait. It means that he’s not fickle-minded even when people don’t understand his significant opinions and beliefs.

17. Vulnerability

It doesn’t come as a surprise that vulnerability is one of the traits women look for in a man. This is often because when he’s vulnerable, he can meet you emotionally and mentally. [Read: What does it mean to be vulnerable? 13 ways you can open up more]

In conflict, a man open to vulnerability won’t just close himself off from you or be passive-aggressive, but he’ll talk about the things that matter.

18. Someone who can be her partner

When a woman falls in love, she wants someone to be her partner and friend, not just her soulmate. She wants someone she can also treat as her best friend, more than anything.

It’s not attractive for her to see a power struggle in the relationship. What one lacks, the other makes up for – that’s what a partnership is all about. [Read: 15 rules to be a good partner in a relationship & wow your lover]

19. Intellect

There’s nothing sexier than a man who displays intellect and wisdom. If you’re wondering what are the things women look for in a man, intellect is always a good trait that impresses women.

In fact, it’s one of the many overlooked things that keep any girl hooked on a guy.

When you make your intellect known, she knows she can learn a thing or two from you. It also gives her the impression that you’re not a superficial person. [Read: 84 Intellectual, deep conversation starters and topics to bond with anyone]

20. Patience

There’s a saying that says love is patient and kind. If you’re wondering what women look for in a man, it’s the ability to be patient, even when things aren’t going his way.

The opposite of patience is temperamental, and that’s never an attractive trait to see in anyone. No woman would want a man who throws punches or screams when he gets angry or has a bad day.

21. Honesty

Yes, this is so generic. Everyone says this, but not everyone lives up to it. Anyone can say that they are honest but anyone can lie. [Read: How to be a good boyfriend – 33 traits that girls desire more than anything else in their man]

When a girl is looking for an honest guy, she doesn’t mean just a guy who doesn’t cheat. She means a guy who talks to her about the good stuff and the bad stuff. 

She wants a guy who admits when he’s made a mistake. Then makes sure he is the one to tell her about it so she doesn’t have to hear it from someone else.

Honesty is the glue that holds all the other things girls look for in a guy together, so focus on this one. [Read: 20 qualities in a guy that make him a really good man]

22. Masculinity

Masculinity is a pretty popular word on social media right now. Actually, toxic masculinity is the phrase that is thrown around, and for good reason. 

Toxic masculinity is seen in a man who needs to prove his manliness through traditionally male things like cars, violence, not crying or showing emotions, and avoiding the color pink, etc.

This is not the masculinity that girls look for in a guy. Rather, gentlemanliness, honor, and humility are what truly show masculinity in a man. [Read: The 25 unmanly and manliest things a guy can do]

If you need some examples of a man who shows his masculinity without an ounce of toxicity in the mix, there is Chris Evans, Tom Hanks, and Mr. Rogers, just to name a few.

23. Openness

A girl looks for a guy willing to try new things. This can range dramatically based on the girl. It can mean you are willing to take a spur-of-the-moment vacation or try a new restaurant.

Openness is also relevant to see things from someone else’s point of view. If you are not open, you are closed. [Read: We’re so glad you want to know how to respect women]

You are essentially stuck in one mindset or view of the world. Being open helps you understand and experience life more fully. Girls want that in a guy.

24. Understanding

Just as a girl understands how bad it hurts to be kicked in the junk without ever actually experiencing it herself, girls look for that empathetic characteristic in a guy. 

A girl wants you to understand how she is feeling. She wants you to pay attention to her worries and fears. [Read: How to show empathy and learn to understand someone else’s feelings]

You may not be able to feel what she is feeling, but by understanding her and empathizing with her, you are trying.

25. Support

All girls want a guy who will support them through their struggles and their choices. Whether that means being there for her in the midst of family drama or supporting her decision to go back to school or apply for a promotion.

A modern-day version of this would be the term “Instagram husband.” This is the boyfriend or husband of an Instagram model that goes out of his way to help her get that perfect photo. [Read: How to be a gentleman and win her over with your charm]

He supports her hustle 100%. The opposite of this would be a guy telling his girlfriend not to post that picture because other guys will look at it.

26. Independence

No girl wants a guy who can’t survive on his own. You should be able to care for yourself and function on your own. 

It isn’t the 1950s anymore. A man should be able to do his own laundry and cook his own food. [Read: 20 Secrets to make a girl fall for you and fall in love before asking him out]

When a girl sees a guy who still has his mom take care of him or is always in a relationship so someone can do these things, it is a major turn-off.

27. Compromise

Having the willingness to compromise is not only something girls look for in a guy, but it is something that is essential to any relationship. 

Someone unwilling to compromise on things like a date spot or who drives will not be able to handle bigger issues in the future. [Read: How to compromise in a relationship and give without losing]

28. Availability

This is something girls look for in a guy on the first date. Actually, before the first date even happens. Now, this doesn’t mean you must have tons of free time. Just be able to make plans and stick to them.

A sign that a guy will not be available regularly is loosely made plans and being hard to reach. A girl will notice that you take the time to prioritize her.

29. Confidence

Confidence is something just about all women look for in a guy.

A guy who second-guesses himself and is in need of constant reassurance and approval is not only unattractive but can be very manipulative and needy to a dysfunctional level. [Read: How to build self-confidence – 16 ways to realize you’re worth it]

Showing that you like who you are and feel good in your own skin will help her see your best qualities.  

30. Acceptance

Just as you want her to accept you and all your quirks or imperfections that make you, you, she wants the same thing. Accept her for who she is. 

She will notice that. Do not judge her for her choices, her past, or anything else. [Read: The 41 best qualities of a good man that sets him apart from lesser men]

Final thoughts

Finally, here’s something you need to remember. While your physical appearance can attract a woman and catch her eye at first glance, what matters more goes beyond that. 

You can sleep with a girl with just your appearance, but if she has to fall for you, these traits will always find their way into her requirement.

[Read: 21 Secrets and ways to ask a girl out on a date and get her to say yes]

So, what are things women look for in a man? These traits we’ve shared are some things you can use to make a woman fall in love with you. Remember, it’s not always about how gorgeous you look, it’s how you make her feel that counts! 

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Kirsten Cole
Kirsten Cole doesn’t like falling in love often. Instead she prefers to hop, skip and jump through her perfect, beautiful life. And of course, if the perfect ...
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