Thank goodness for technology! Now you can simply text and talk to the girl you’re crushing over without having to sweat and bumble over your words. Of course, you still need to know how to text the girl you like in the right way, otherwise, your efforts are completely in vain.
You might think that firing off a quick text is easy, and compared to actually approaching her, it is. Yet, you can still get it very, very wrong indeed if you’re not careful.
Wrong timing, wrong words, misunderstandings, allowing texting anxiety to take hold.
The potential for disaster is still pretty high even if you manage to spare your in-person blushes. It’s also far easier for someone to ignore you over text than it is when you approach them in person.
The good news is that you can learn how to improve your text game and improve your chances of your crush responding in a positive way. [Read: How to make a girl like you without asking her out]
While some guys are great with words, many are not. These guys want to keep texts as short and infrequent as possible.
Regardless of how you feel about texting in general, texting is the main way you’ll communicate with a girl while you’re getting to know her. If you do it right, you’ll land a date *or more*. If you do it wrong, you could blow your chances with her.
Good texting skills will help you show off your charm and let her know that you make talking to her and getting to know her a priority in your life.
But if you make mistakes, it can make you seem awkward or uninterested in her. [Read: Rules of texting – 15 unwritten texting rules you need to remember]
That’s why it’s important to know how to text a girl the right way.
If you do any amount of research into this question, you’ll come up with a million answers. The reason? There is no right or wrong answer here!
It’s not the best idea to text her literally seconds after she gives you her number. That would make you look extremely eager. But, you don’t have to wait three days, or however long it is supposed to be these days, either.
If you want to text her, go ahead and do it. Forget the so-called rules. [Read: 15 dating rules for men that’ll transform your dating game]
If you want to learn the right way to contact your crush, just use these few tips when it comes to how to text a girl you like. Here’s everything you need to know to learn the art of texting like a pro.
Most girls are busy during the day, so if you text her around this time, she might become busy, forget you’ve texted, and not reply.
If you text late at night, you run the risk of her getting the wrong idea and assuming you’re after a booty call.
Start by texting her early in the evening and look for ways to keep the conversation going. Most people are more relaxed at this time and usually not quite so busy. [Read: How to flirt with a girl by behaving like a friend]
First text works wonders.
If you want to know how to send your first message, don’t think too much of it. Just keep it casual and simple.
Try something like, “Hey! Just thought I’d say hi!” it’s simple and just one of several ways to initiate the first text with a girl you like, but it’s pretty boring too.
It’s better to think of something quirky and unique to say because that way you’ll stick in her mind, and she’ll be more inclined to reply. However, there is a difference between quirky and weird, remember that!
In truth, as long as you don’t accidentally insult her, there’s never a wrong way to text a girl. It’s what you do after the first text message conversation that always matters. [Read: What do girls look for in a guy to fall for him?]
Nobody’s got time for paragraphs! If you’ve been texting each other back and forth for a few days, you really don’t need to look for reasons to text her again, nor do you need long elaborate introductions.
Start with a warm and simple line that feels good to read. It leaves the conversation open and you’ll be able to know if she’s free to chat too.
“Hey, what are you doing?” or even just a smiley face should work perfectly to start a conversation once the initial icebreaker has already been used. Keep your texting short to keep her on her toes and she’ll want to get to know you even more. [Read: What to text a girl you just met – 25 ideas to ensure that she texts you back]
There’s just something about a good morning/good night text that makes a person feel warm inside. Those texts are simple yet effective.
You’re letting her know she’s on your mind when you wake up and when you go to bed. Now, you don’t need to send both of them, or else it can be a little much.
But that also depends on your connection and conversations throughout the day. [Read: 20 reasons a good morning text is so important]
Ask her about her day. Be interested in her life and let her know that you’re always interested in knowing more about her while texting each other. It’ll help her open up.
It also shows that you’re not selfish or self-absorbed. Constantly talking about yourself might be something you do out of nerves, but it can really backfire.
At the same time, don’t fire questions at her as though she’s in an interview either. Having a text exchange with every girl you’re talking to should come down to a blend of back-and-forth questions and mutual conversation. [Read: 60 get-to-know-you questions for a new romance]
How did you two meet before you had her number? Were you friends? Did you ask for her number? Is it through online dating? This will help you decide what to text a girl you like, and how you’re going to approach her.
If you two were already friends, well, now you need to express that you like her more than a friend and see what happens.
But if you’ve met her at a club, bar, or from a mutual friend, you’re starting without much information about her. [Read: How to start subtly flirting with a girl over text]
Pet names are very personal and unique. If you want the relationship to take the next step, you need to create a personal bond between both of you.
And the best way to do just that is by giving her a pet name. Personalize the relationship both of you share and it’ll bring both of you closer.
But, don’t do this straight away because it may seem like you’re moving too fast – wait until you’ve been texting back and forth for a while. [Read: How to choose a perfect and unique nickname]
A good way to text someone is to mirror their texts. So, if she’s someone who uses emojis, feel free to use them in your texts. If she’s a quick replier, you don’t need to wait five hours to send her a message. If she teases you, tease her back.
Let her set the tone and adjust yourself to it. [Read: How to tease a girl over text and get her to flirt back with you]
No, not dick pics or forced selfies. If you’re camping on the weekend, send her a picture of the view. Or the new bike you bought. It doesn’t really matter, but by doing this, you include her in your day.
Plus, it gives her an idea of who you are as a person. Who knows, maybe she’s really into camping as well.
Every now and then, you’ll find the perfect opportunity to flirt with her. Wait for that moment and use it to tease her, especially when she makes a compliment about herself or talks about how good she is at doing something. [Read: The best flirty texts & sweet messages to make her smile]
A good excuse to challenge and flirt with her will always work in your favor.
But always be vague unless you already know what she wants to hear. You can play it safe or get naughty depending on the way she texts back.
You: “I wish I was with you right now”
She: “Yeah? Why?”
You: “You did say you’re in bed, right?”
[Read: 20 very subtle dirty questions to ask a girl and make her wet in under 15 minutes]
Unless the girl you’re texting specifically says she hates emojis, make sure you leave a few kisses and a smile when you’re texting her goodbye.
Even if she makes a big deal of it, you can always joke about it and say it was a goodbye kiss on her cheek! [Read: How to make a girl want to kiss you by arousing her]
If she tells you that she’s got an important meeting at work the next day or she’s got a big test coming up, remember and ask her how it went. It shows that you’re listening, and she’ll think it’s really sweet that you put an effort to ask.
Always look for ways to create a bond between you. Tell her about your favorite song, movie, or place you like. Each time she comes across something you’ve talked about, give her a reason to think of you.
The major issue with texting is that there is a huge scope for misunderstanding.
How you might read something in your mind may not be the same as how she reads it. You don’t want to come across as offensive or not at all funny. [Read: 8 little texting mistakes new couples often make]
Make sure that you read your message before you send it. Don’t stress over it too much, but at the same time, just check there’s nothing in there that could be taken the wrong way.
Compliment her appearance, her personality, or say something that makes her feel warm and fuzzy inside. Who doesn’t love to get complimented? But focus on these texts a few minutes before you say goodbye.
If you want her to fall for you, she has to become excited by you and then has to feel romantically attached to you. That’s the way love and infatuation work. [Read: Tips to subtly touch a girl and turn her on]
By flirting with her, you’ll be able to arouse her. And by talking about how special she is or complimenting her for her personality at the end of your texting conversation, it’s a subtle way to let her know that you like her.
It’s the perfect balance to make a girl like you over text.
Now, teasing is fun and it’s cute in some ways, but it doesn’t always translate well into every text.
If you’re going to tease her, make sure it’s nothing that could be misconstrued and nothing too personal. [Read: How to flirt with a girl – 54 secrets and 41 examples to make a woman blush]
Remember, you don’t know her that well yet and she’s still trying to work you out.
Emojis can help you text her better, as you can send a winking face or a kissy face after a teasing comment so that she knows it’s meant in good nature.
You might want her to remember you right at that moment, just in case she’s around other people who may turn her head, but it comes over as being a little too much. [Read: Should I text her? What to know before you touch your phone]
If she’s told you that she’s going out with friends or family, give her the space she needs and perhaps just ask her if she had a nice time when you text her the next day.
She’ll appreciate you giving her some space.
If you’re struggling to come up with something to say, you could always think of a funny scenario and pose it to her.
Such as, would you rather stay on a beautiful Caribbean Island without your cell phone for a month or somewhere freezing cold with Internet access? [Read: 140 very random but fun questions to ask a girl and make her enjoy texting you]
These are quirky ideas, and they’ll make her laugh. It’s also a way to get to know someone a lot by asking these questions but again, less is more!
Occasionally – with ‘occasionally being the word’, send her a funny meme or video you’ve found. It will make her smile and there’s no need for words from you when you send something like that either. Doing this will show that you remember her, regardless if you met online or in person. [Read: 25 funny things to text a girl & win her heart with your funny bone]
That’s right. No one ever calls each other anymore, but the guys who do take that step are always remembered. It’s a big move nowadays and can tell a lot about a guy. To actually phone someone means you’re really into them.
When you call her, say something like “what I want to say is too long to text,” or “I can’t text anymore, my fingers are cramping” and add a line that you were eager to listen to her voice too.
Okay, of course, you can text her without having a goal. Maybe she popped into your mind, or you just want to keep the interaction fresh – we get it.
But, at the end of the day, your goal is to go on a date with her, right? Right. [Read: How to ask a girl out over text and get that instant “yes!”]
So, yes, text her, but eventually, at some point, you’ll need take time to ask her out.
Don’t try to be someone who’s super outgoing and then in person, you’re like a church mouse. Be who you are.
If you don’t like rap music and she does, don’t try to pretend you know all the words to the latest rap hit. Think this way – if she likes you, great. If not, move on.
Girls love to laugh. Everyone loves to laugh. So, feel free to crack a couple of jokes or send her something funny.
Don’t be too forceful with the jokes. And if she’s not laughing, well, maybe Google some new jokes. A joke is one of the great things to text a girl. [Read: 50 flirty text messages that are sure to make her smile]
If you see a post online or hear someone talking about something that reminds you of her, text her. Why not? It’ll show her that you’re thinking of her, and she’ll probably appreciate it.
Also, it’s a great way to start a conversation without just saying, “hey.” [Read: 25 fun and flirty ways to say ‘hi’ in a text message in a casual way]
Why not send her new movie trailers or music videos?
This is a great way to not only see something new, but it opens up the space for conversation. Also, if it’s a new movie, well, it’s a great way to ask her out.
Whether or not she’s the only girl you’re talking to, you want to make her feel like she’s #1. No one wants to feel like they’re just one out of the many girls you’re trying to get with.
So, when you talk to her, actually talk to her. This is one of the best ways to get a girl to like you. [Read: 20 flirty ways to text your crush and get them interested]
Mysterious guys are fun to chase, but once you get them, they’re boring. Why? Because they’re so uptight and serious.
You want to be someone who can take a joke and also doesn’t take themselves so seriously. [Read: How to avoid the friend zone and make her desire you]
No one wants to read an essay on their phone. So, when you’re writing her, keep the text short and sweet. Say what you want to say without adding filler sentences.
Her eyes will thank you.
[Read: 20 dirty questions to ask a girl and leave her wet and horny]
You’ll want to choose questions to get her to open up. If you want to ask a flirtatious, personal, or funny question, then be ready to respond to her answer.
Even the best questions can get you into trouble if you don’t show interest in how she responds. Have a few of them in your back pocket so you have them ready to go at a moment’s notice, although make sure that you don’t get too personal with your questions as you’ll sound nosy. [Read: How to get to know a girl – 20 ways to see if she’s perfect for you]
If you just met her, you don’t want to start calling her pet names right off the bat. Instead, use the actual name that she goes by.
If you use a pet name or things like “baby” or “babe,” she might be creeped out that you’re using names that are just too personal when you don’t know someone that well.
Also, it sounds generic, like you could send it to any girl. That’s why using her actual name is best to make her feel like you’re really engaged in the conversation. [Read: How to be likable without a lot of effort or changing who you are]
Yes, in today’s day and age, texting lingo is a thing. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to read. In fact, sometimes it just gives the message that you are too lazy to actually type out full words. Fix your texting style!
If you use bad grammar, you will sound uneducated or dumb. And you certainly don’t want that, do you?
[Read: Texting etiquette and flirting – 26 rules guys and girls must follow]
You might be surprised to hear this, but sometimes girls don’t want you to text back immediately every time. But it’s not because they want you to play hard to get.
Instead, it’s because she wants a guy with a life – a job, friends, hobbies, etc. In other words, she wants someone who has better things to do than just sitting around and texting her all day.
Make her wait for a little between texts. That way, she will be anxious to hear from you. [Read: How to text after a date and make them fall for you even harder]
Women love to know that you’re thinking of them. Whether she’s romantically interested in you or not, there’s still something nice about knowing somewhere in the great wild yonder, someone has you on their mind.
Just don’t follow up with a text describing how you’re thinking about her with a raging hard-on. [Read: How to be a tease – 13 really flirty moves to capture their attention]
Sometimes, learning what to text a girl has less to do with starting a conversation and more to do with giving her an anecdote. If you run across a wacky customer at work or witness a real character in line at your local coffee shop, share your experiences with her!
You’re not looking to chit-chat, you’re looking to entertain her. Take a mental note of hilarious tidbits you encounter throughout the week and hit her where it counts – her funny bone! [Read: How to make a girl laugh and 29 ways to make her get a crush on you]
That’s the whole point of learning what to text a girl, right? Send her cute texts that are simple enough for her to answer quickly, but that has the potential to start a conversation and get to know her better. [Read: 60 get-to-know-you questions for a new romance!]
Now, when you do this make sure you steer clear of any contentious subjects that could go down a very awkward path. Keep it light and fun.
You could debate about your favorite character in a show you both like, or what type of music is better. The goal here is to keep her engaged and show her you’re interested in hearing her point of view.
When you have an “in-joke,” it means you have a personal connection and that’s something you can use to build your budding relationship! Plus, making them laugh is a great place to start if you want to win her over. [Read: Why girls love funny guys]
But, remember – no dick pics! If you’re out and about and you see a great sunset, send her a picture. If you’re enjoying a rather cute-looking coffee, snap it.
It’ll help her get to know you better.
Of course, texting has the potential for disaster too. The key is to know how to avoid making major mistakes and stick to the right way to do things.
Here are a few things you must avoid when learning what to text a girl you like. [Read: How to be more interesting – 21 tricks to go from boring to lovable]
Don’t feel that you always need to be the one to text first. Not only does this put pressure on you and cause a pleasant situation to turn stressful but it may cause her to feel bombarded with texts. Maybe she’s just not someone who texts much – those people do still exist!
Do your bit for a few days and then wait and see if she texts you first the following day. If she’s into you, she will – just hang tight! If she hasn’t responded to your second text, you know what that means. [Read: How often should you text a girl? 17 must-know rules of texting]
You don’t need to text that. Nothing really good comes out of texting a girl, “what’s up?” It’s stale. Instead, tell her what you’re doing and then ask her what’s up. It just gives off a better vibe, and that you’re into the conversation.
Unless you’re in the middle of a texting conversation, it’s a good idea to wait a few minutes before you respond. Otherwise, it looks like you’re sitting with your phone in your hand, waiting for her to text you.
We mean, you are probably, but she doesn’t need to know that! [Read: Good morning texts – 50 ways to start someone’s day with a smile]
Also, don’t wait too long either! Yes, it’s a game you need to get right but if you leave her waiting too long, she’s going to get bored and assume you’re not interested.
At the end of the day, you’re simply talking to another human being. Yes, it’s a girl you like, but she’s still human! Try not to build it up too much in your mind and allow your natural personality to shine through. [Read: Texting etiquette & flirting – 26 rules guys & girls must follow]
Even if she knows you like her already, avoid flirting with her in every single instance. It’ll just bore her if all you do is flirt with her.
Text about everyday activities and let her see that you’re interested in knowing more about her and her life. [Read: 5 different types of flirting and how to pick one that works for you]
Ah, texting anxiety. That old chestnut! Once you’ve texted her for the first time, wait a while. She may be busy, she may not have a charge on her phone, or she may simply be tired.
Wait until the next day and don’t be tempted to send another text trying to push her into responding. It just comes over as desperate or clingy. Keep yourself busy and try and distract your mind.
If she hasn’t responded by the end of the next day, it’s generally okay to send one more text but after that, leave it alone. Don’t push or chase. If she doesn’t give you her attention freely, you don’t want it. [Read: Am I being ghosted? 25 signs you’re on the verge of being dropped by a girl]
If you constantly text late at night, she’s going to think that you’ve got only one thing in mind. Booty calls or booty texts aren’t the best way to start a potential relationship.
Sure if that’s all you want, go for it, but if you want to build something a little more long-lasting, make sure that you vary the times of the day you text her and don’t stick to the dead of the night.
Yes, you should ask questions to get the conversation flowing but don’t fire question after question at her. [Read: Make her yours – How to flirt with a girl over text]
If you do that, she’s going to feel like she’s in the middle of a text job interview and talking to someone she might never set a date with.
We’ve touched upon this one before but it’s worth really solidifying in your mind. Dick pics are never welcome. Never. Just don’t. Please. [Read: Dick selfies and why men love sending dick pics to women]
Yes, you want to keep the conversation ticking along nicely but remember that she probably has things she needs to do with her day and that doesn’t mean she can sit and text you constantly.
Sometimes, less is more! If she goes quiet, don’t panic; it’s probably that she’s busy and she’ll get back to you later on.
If you text a girl and she doesn’t reply, don’t send another text yet. Just don’t. Leave it a few days, and if you want to, there is a window of opportunity to send one more – but only one.
If you don’t get a reply after that, it looks like she’s not interested and you have to let it go and move on.
Yes, it’s hard, but don’t be so thirsty that you’re bombarding her and wanting to know why she’s not replying. [Read: 22 reasons why she’s suddenly lost interest and what you can do now]
The problem with texting is that you can never be sure how the person is going to interpret your words unless you’re very clear.
Unless you know someone very well, you can never be sure how they’re going to take something like sarcasm, because it can so easily be misunderstood.
Make sure that you check your texts before you send them and don’t try and be mysterious – it just won’t work in written form. [Read: The best ways to tell if she’s flirting or just being friendly]
As you can see, texting isn’t as easy as it looks! However, these few tips will help you to get it right every time, and look forward to plentiful long text conversations that you can move toward in-person date situations.
If you pump it up to be some big event in your head, *which, let’s be honest, it’s not a big deal*, you’ll freak out.
And what happens when you’re anxious? You say something stupid. So just think of it like you’re texting one of your friends. If you can’t do that, write out your text and don’t send it until later. [Read: How to text a girl you like and make her want you]
If you’re asking a girl out twice a day, she’s going to avoid it. You’re annoying. No one likes to be pushed into doing something and she probably won’t want to meet you.
So, if you ask once and she doesn’t directly say yes *or she cancels at the last minute*, don’t ask again for a while. In fact, don’t even ask again. But, if you want to keep trying, just pull back a bit. [Read: 25 clear signs you should back off when pursuing a girl]
There’s little in life that is more annoying than being harassed via text message or social media. Get a clue, dude, she’s ignoring you for a reason!
There’s a fine line between being flirtatious and just being downright creepy. Take a moment to re-read your text to a girl before you hit the send button.
If it makes you sound like a weirdo or a total perv, odds are you should delete it and start again. [Read: 20 texting etiquette tips and tricks for classy dating]
“I love you” is still one of the most monumental moments in a relationship. The highlights are the first date, your first “I love you,” your engagement, your wedding, and any subsequent babies you may have.
Don’t cheapen an amazing moment like your first “I love you” by making her guess your tone of voice through words on a screen. Texts like that will only get a girl confused.
Be a romantic and say it in person! The only exception to this rule is if you are in a long-distance relationship. Even then… man up and Skype her instead! [Read: When should you say “I love you” for the first time?]
Seriously, this is up there with sending dick pics – don’t do it!
You might want it, you’re human after all, but don’t ask for it. If you’re asking for her to tell you how wonderful you are, she’s going to think you’re either desperate for attention or pretty sad.
Don’t be either. [Read: 6 reasons to love yourself first before falling in love]
She is not there to solve your problems or make you feel better. You’re supposed to be showing her how wonderful you are and trying to get her to agree to a date.
Trying to make her act like your therapist isn’t going to achieve those aims. last time yo
By doing this, you look totally uninterested and she’s going to become frustrated very quickly. She will wonder why you bothered initiating the conversation if all you’re going to do is say ‘yes’ and ‘no.’
Come on, use your imagination and keep that conversation over text flowing! [Read: How to keep a conversation going with a girl and make her brighten up]
Of course, the most difficult part of learning how to text a girl is actually breaking the ice. How do you send that first text and grab her attention? Or, how do you send the first text that day and hope she’s into chatting?
Basically, anything other than ‘hey’ will do! You need to show some imagination and make her think that texting you back and forth is going to be a fun experience. The best way to do this is to treat your first message like the first message you’d send to a girl you don’t know on a dating app.
To help you out, let’s check out 10 good conversation text starters to try. [Read: Drawing a blank? Try these 25 good conversation starters]
1. How is your day? What can I do to make it much better?
2. Tell me a joke!
3. Do you have a favorite podcast? I need a new one
4. I’ve just had the best ice cream. We’ll have to go sometime [Read: Top 10 fun and romantic summer date ideas]
5. You were waiting for me to text, weren’t you? (Add in a winking face to show you’re joking!)
6. What are your plans this evening?
7. Have you seen ….? – Insert any news story or funny story you’ve seen on social media that’s doing the rounds
8. What is your favorite breakfast?
9. I’m looking for a new spot for dinner, any suggestions?
10. What has been the best part of today so far? [Read: 35 best text conversation starters for the shy and socially awkward]
You might be patting yourself on the back at this point, happy that you’ve broken the ice and started a conversation. But, how do you keep that chat going?
Sometimes, starting a conversation is much easier than the rest. You want to continue texting back and forth and then have a regular texting girl buddy after that. Learning how to text a girl means knowing how to avoid conversation boredom. [Read: How to ask a girl out on a date]
This might sound counterproductive, but wait a minute. Maybe she’s busy.
If she’s sending you one-word answers and you get the idea that she’s preoccupied, back off and let her come to you. [Read: People who talk too much – Why they do it and 21 ways to handle them]
Don’t just do the usual, ‘how are you?’ It lacks imagination and it’s boring. Instead, come up with some interesting and unique questions to ask and then pepper them into your chat.
Of course, don’t throw questions at her like she’s in a job interview either.
Don’t delve into sensitive subjects, but ask regular questions about her life and background. Then, use what she tells you to come up with further questions to keep the chat going.
Of course, you also need to be ready to answer any questions she asks you! The goal here is to create a strong connection with a girl to make her interested. [Read: 177 fun random questions to ask a girl and make her enjoy your company]
Everyone likes to be asked about positive subjects such as this. Show her that you’re interested and she’ll feel more comfortable opening up and talking about it.
You’ll see the passion and happiness radiating through her words and she will associate these good feelings with talking to you. [Read: 77 funny things to text a girl and make her laugh and love you over text]
It’s so easy to become anxious when sending a text to a girl you like, but remember that she’s just another human being! All you’re doing is having a conversation and you’ll see what comes of it.
Try not to become so engrossed in the texting that you become nervous when you don’t get an immediate reply. Send the text, put your phone down and distract your mind. If you’re relaxed, it will shine through in your messages.
[Read: Texting anxiety – How to send and receive texts without freaking out]
Keep these tips on how to text a girl you like in your mind while texting her. And you’ll see how easy it can be to woo a girl through a few well-timed texts and lines.
Liked what you just read? Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, we’ll be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life.
LOVEPANKY IN YOUR INBOX
Get the very best of LovePanky straight to your inbox!