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Do I Love Her? 33 Signs to Discover Your True Feelings

There is no mathematic equation to solve the problem, do I love her? But, there are signs that will clue you into your true feelings.

do i love her

Ah, love is a mysterious thing, romantically speaking. It is also a frustrating, angering, exciting, confusing, mind-blowing, and sometimes scary thing. There is puppy love, infatuation, lust, and real love. Sometimes it all feels the same and leads you to ask yourself, do I love her?

There is no clear test to determine love. It isn’t easy to figure out if she is the one for you or the one for this week with so many gray areas. Love isn’t just about wanting to rip a girl’s clothes off, although that can definitely be a part of it. It is about this indescribable feeling.

Sure, love can be seen, heard, and experienced, but even people who have a vast knowledge of love have a hard time really explaining it. [Read: What does true love feel like?]

What is love?

Before you find the answer to the question, “do I love her?” you should know what love is. Love is not just one thing or one feeling.

Love is a combination of so many emotions. It is a state of being. If you mix admiration, respect, lust, intimacy, passion, commitment, and trust, you get something at resembles love.

Answering the question do I love her can be as simple as just knowing. Trust your gut, and you might know. But, for those who’ve never been in love, are hesitant to be in love, or for whatever reason want to be really sure, read on for the signs that you love her. [Read: How to recognize love]

Do I love her?

When a man is in love, he behaves differently than when he isn’t. He is less selfish, more protective, and a lot more understanding. Love isn’t just a feeling like saying, “I love that new taco place.” Love changes you, your behavior, and even your future if done right.

So, find out the answer to your question, do I love her with these signs.

1. You want to share good news with her

Being in love means that she is who you go to when you want to celebrate. You want to share good moments with her. You want her to be proud of you. If you burst at the seams to tell your girl all the good things that come your way before anyone else, that is a good sign you love her. [Read: Have you been hit by cupid’s arrow already?]

2. You want to share bad news with her

Even more critical, she becomes your emergency call. When she is the person you reach out to when something bad happens, you want her there. You know her presence will improve any situation.

That is a sign of trust and support, which are huge parts of love. The first person you think of when the shit hits the fan is the person you trust and love.

3. You’re protective of her

You get angry or upset when someone treats her with disrespect. Whether it is her boss or a random dude at a restaurant, your first instinct is to make him pay. But, hopefully, you brush that aside and instead worry about how it is affecting her.

If you love her, instead of acting out in rage or jealousy, you are protective of her. You want her to feel comfortable and safe regardless of the anger you may have for the person that caused her pain. [Read: 80 questions to ask before getting serious with her]

4. You see her in your future

You may not be actively making plans with her, but you reconsider her even subconsciously when thinking about the future. If your boss offers you a promotion, you think about how it might help you two afford a nice place together.

You aren’t just thinking of yourself but incorporate her into things you never really thought about before. Even if you’ve always wanted a sick bachelor pad, you’re more than happy to give that up to be happy with her. Changing something you thought was set in stone for her is a sign you love her.

5. You think about what your kids would be like

If you see qualities in her and think, “Man, I think our kids are going to be awesome if they inherit that.” Cupid’s arrow has likely hit you. We find things in the people we love that we want to carry on and be a part of for eternity.

Even if you never thought about having kids, these thoughts may just jump into your head because of human nature.

6. You think about having kids

If you want kids *There’s nothing wrong with not wanting them, though* and you even think about possibly having kids with her, it might be a sign that she’s stolen your heart. [Read: Everything a couple must do before having a baby]

7. You really care about what she thinks of you

We all care about what people think of us at times. But, if the smallest criticism from her sends you reeling and rethinking who you are and makes you want to change, then there is a good possibility you love her. If she thinks you’re messy, you want to be more organized and tidy because she sees that possibility in you.

You want her to see potential in you, and her belief in you makes you want to be better.

8. You feel horrible when she is upset with you

If she is upset with you for anything, it breaks you. Whether you accidentally snapped at her, offended her, or made a mistake, knowing your actions hurt her is brutal. You would do anything to calm the situation and make sure she is no longer hurting.

If you truly love her, you’ll have no problem admitting you were wrong and saying sorry because you know she deserves it. [Read: Sweet ways to genuinely say “I’m sorry“]

9. You think about ways to make her happy

If you find yourself daydreaming about how to bring out her smile, then that might signal that you care more about her than you do yourself. When you’re out and about, you think about what little treats you can pick up to surprise her.

Small things like that say more about love than even grand gestures.

10. You find yourself daydreaming about her

If you can’t get anything done without her face having a magic glow around it, then you are probably smitten. It may be even more than that. If you are more focused on making the evening special for her than getting your work done, love may be taking over.

11. When she hurts, you hurt

If a coworker makes her cry or hurts her feelings, you feel that too. You aren’t just sad that she is upset but almost feel like an empath with her. When she is suffering, you are suffering no matter what caused it. Sharing that bond is a sign you love her. [Read: 30 ways to make someone feel better]

12. You care about what her family thinks

If you shower and clean yourself up just to meet some distant cousin, then you have been bitten by the love bug. This isn’t just about putting your best foot forward in terms of appearance, either.

You want to make a good impression and need them to know how much you care about her. [Read: How to tell if there is serious chemistry between two people]

13. You want her to get to know your family

The fact that you aren’t running for the hills or not wanting to get involved is a huge red flag that she stole your heart. Not only do you want to meet her family, but you want her to meet yours. You want your worlds to mesh together. Being in love will do that to you.

14. You make decisions together

Where you live, your career moves, and your house buying are based on your life together. You don’t just make choices for yourself anymore. You decide things together, even your weekend plans. When you want someone to be involved in all aspects of your life, it is probably because you love her. [Read: How to have a good relationship that keeps getting better]

15. You’ve made a commitment

If you are okay with tying yourself to her by adopting an animal together, that is the kind of commitment you don’t just make willy-nilly. You are in it for the long haul. An animal of any kind means you don’t see an end in sight.

16. You like her “flaws”

The things she sees as flaws, you just see them. You don’t nit-pick at her worst habits. Instead, you think the way she taps her foot when she is nervous is cute. You don’t have feelings for her in spite of these things, but because of them just as much as all the good stuff.

Love makes you see imperfect things perfectly. It’s not that you’re ignoring or looking past anything, but that you truly love her for everything she is. [Read: The 3-month milestone – Time to get real and let the crazy out]

17. When she needs you, there isn’t anything you wouldn’t do to be there for her

You would move mountains, take out the biggest guy ever, or tell your mom to back off if she needs you to. When she is crying to you on the phone, you drop everything to be with her.

You don’t find her needing you to be a burden but a privilege. That is a key sign you love her.

18. You want to know how she feels about you

If you find you feel vulnerable and often worry that you care more about her than she does, that is called fear of rejection. This isn’t just about your ego, but due to your feelings for her. You crave to hear how she feels about you.

You care so deeply you can’t imagine that she cares for you this much. Having those intense emotions mimicks love pretty darn closely. [Read: How to know if a girl likes you]

19. You still have butterflies with her

If you still have that feeling of lust and butterflies long after the last phase is over, then the answer to, do I love her, is yes. Love may switch from one kind to another, but if you are truly “in love,” you go back and forth. You still find yourself thinking she is amazing and beautiful.

You may not be nervous around her, but you still get giddy about going on a date with her, and it is super sweet.

20. She has the ability to make everything okay

If she takes dark and stormy skies and makes the sky blue, then that is the person that you should hold onto. *Sorry about the rhyming, but it works*

If just sitting next to her when you’re in a bad mood makes things a little brighter, it may be because you love her. she might not actually be doing anything but just being with her makes things better than they were without her. That is love. [Read: 25 reasons to love someone and hold onto them forever]

21. You enjoy just watching her sleep in the morning

People aren’t always pretty when they sleep. Some people snore or drool or say weird things in their sleep. And although this may sound a little creepy, you find watching her sleep to be soothing.

No matter what she does when she sleeps, you still see her as spectacular, then, my friend, that is love!

22. You catch yourself watching her when you are out and think about how lucky you are

If you find yourself in the midst of a party looking around for her just to get a glimpse of her beautiful face, then you are probably in love. It just is what it is. You see her laughing with friends or playing with someone’s dog, and you smile, thinking about how good you have it. That is love.

23. You would rather fight with her than be content with someone else

Even when you’re in the middle of a fight, you want to take her in your arms. Whether she is giving you the silent treatment or she sold you favorite ugly cargo shorts, you still wouldn’t have it any other way. Love allows you to gloss over the not-so-lovely. [Read: Why fighting is important in a relationship & how to do it right]

24. You can’t even think about losing her

If you can’t even fathom what it would feel to lose her, then you are in love. [Read: 15 traits that set selfless love apart from selfish love]

25. WWSD

Instead of thinking, “What would Jesus do” you think, “What would she do” because you respect her opinion that much when you’re in a tough spot, you consider how she would handle it and may even reach out for advice.

26. You want to tell her you love her

If you have the urge to say those three little words to her, you love her. That is your gut yelling, “WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?” [Read: Should you say “I love you” first? Or wait to hear it?]

27. You’ve never felt like this

Whether you’ve been in love before or not, every love is different. If the feelings you have for her can’t be compared to anything you’ve felt before. It is probably love. You love her. If you want to say it, you should.

28. You’re not afraid of commitment

Most guys have some level of fear when it comes to commitment. Whether you picked that up from society, TV shows, or just your own family, it is a real fear. But, with her, that fades away.

Think about Chandler from Friends. He was afraid of any level of commitment until Monica, and then he was more than happy to move in together and get married because he loved her. [Read: 19 signs you’re ready for a serious relationship]

29. You trust her

Trust and love go hand in hand. Although one can break, it usually pulls the other within. If you trust her with your secrets and are comfortable being yourself with her, the odds are you love her. Stop questioning it and enjoy it.

30. You’re vulnerable with her

If you are a guy who rarely opens up about his feelings but feels himself opening up like a book around her, there is a reason for that, and it isn’t that she is some sort of psychic. She makes you feel safe and secure. You aren’t afraid she’ll judge you. You want her to know all of you because you love her. [Read: How to be vulnerable in a relationship without feeling too scared]

31. Your friends notice how happy you are

Your friends point out that you’re glowing or just seem different and happier since you’ve been with her. Whether she is around or you’re texting her, the people in your life know when you’re in love. If they see these changes in you, they are spot on. You love her.

32. You talk about her a lot

When you love her, you talk about her. You can’t help yourself. You find excuses to bring her up in random conversations. Everything someone says makes you think of her or something she told you.

33. You’re scared and excited

Love is a scary thing. It is a risk. But, it is so exciting and liberating. There is nothing like it. The reason love is so exciting is because of that fear.

If you feel scared and excited about her and your relationship all at once, that is love, my friend. [Read: How to overcome the fear of losing someone you love]

There is no magic sign that screams, “I love her.” Sometimes you have stars in your eyes from the get-go. You know that she is the woman of your dreams. Being the woman of your dreams, however, is different from love. If you want to know do I love her, these are some of the feelings you’ll experience.

[Read: 12 truest signs of true love in any relationship]

Do I love her? Well, love is a fleeting and miraculous thing. Hopefully, it only comes once in a lifetime and stays for a lifetime.

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The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...