There comes a time when you finally realize that the girl standing right in front of you turns out to be the girl you’re meant to be with. That’s when you know when it’s love; however, knowing it and showing it are two very different things. But you still want to know how to show the girl you love her.
Once you know you’re in love, anything can happen. You can either ride the waves and let yourself go by showing that person how much you love them, or you can freeze up because you have no idea what comes next.
The process happens differently for everybody, but one thing is for sure: you don’t want to lose her.
To keep her, however, you have to show her how you really feel. But how do you do that? Is there a pattern you need to follow? Are there rules? Read on to find out.
[Read: The right way to tell a girl you love her without losing her]
To begin, let’s discuss the five love languages. Dr. Gary Chapman, a marriage therapist, discovered these languages after decades of working with couples. His work culminated in his famous book, The Five Love Languages.
In a nutshell, what Dr. Chapman says is that how you express and want to receive affection depends on you as an individual. That’s why it’s important to know not only your own love language but your partner’s too.
Let’s take a look at the five love languages.
Some people like to give or receive gifts as their expression of love. It may seem like you’re buying love, but that’s not always the case.
Long before dating became a complicated concept, men were tasked with giving their chosen mates gifts like meat for their home or a trophy from a hunt. [Read: The best gifts for your girl]
As time went on, the concept of gift-giving remained intact, i.e. dowry, expensive gifts from suitors, and paying for dates. Giving gifts is a way of showing that you’re willing to go above and beyond for the person you love.
Another one of the love languages is words of affirmation. The people with this love language like to hear the words “I love you” and other nice things from their partner.
They want to get compliments and to hear how much their partner appreciates them. In other words, they are less concerned with other expressions of love. They feel like when they hear loving words from their partner, then they are loved.
So if you want to show a girl you love her, and her love language is words of affirmation, she would feel more loved and special when she hears you tell her that you love her, or if you express your love for her with words. [Read: The power of words and how it can make or break your relationship]
Time is precious, and we only have so much of it. So, for some people, they want their partner to spend quality time with them.
It’s not enough for them to be sitting on the couch watching TV or having them in the next room playing video games.
They want to have deep conversations and connect with their partner on an emotional level by spending time together. [Read: How much time should couples spend together? 24 clues to your number]
In a romantic relationship, touch is a very important factor. Sure, there is sex and sensual touch, but it goes beyond that.
If your love language is touch, then you want to cuddle while you sleep, hold hands, hug, and touch your partner as much as possible. And of course, that does include sex too. [Read: 20 romantic and loving touches that’ll make your partner feel closer to you]
The last love language is acts of service. What this means is that someone wants their partner to do nice things for them.
For example, if they cook dinner, mow the lawn, change their oil, or give them a massage – that’s considered an act of service. They believe in the saying “actions speak louder than words.” So, they want to see action on the part of their significant other.
Now that you know the love languages, what does all of this mean?
[Read: 23 real ways to love someone and make them feel true love from you]
Let’s take an example. Let’s say that you like to express your love for your girl by giving gifts. So, you buy your girl flowers all the time and surprise her with little things all the time, regardless of how small.
It could be just a Starbucks coffee that you bring to her work. You think you are being a really loving boyfriend.
However, maybe her love language is words of affirmation. And while you are over there buying her all these gifts, she would rather hear you say “I love you” and compliment her on things rather than getting gifts from you.
You see, if a couple has different love languages, then both of them may not feel loved. You might think you’re showing love, but you might not be showing it in her love language, but rather, in your own. [Read: 41 ways to show someone you love them in a way they want to be loved]
So, when you want to learn how to show a girl you love her, you have to know her love language and your own. In order to make her feel loved, you need to speak her love language.
It’s not that difficult, you just need to figure out what it is, and then do it.
Now that we’ve gone over how love is expressed through different love languages—what about surefire ways to express love to the one you’re with now? These methods are sure to demonstrate your adoration.
Have you ever noticed that most people are adamant about spending time with their partners in person? Long-distance relationships are called “the kiss of death” for a reason: because close proximity is intoxicating and promotes deeper connections.
Spend more time with your girl in person and always keep yourself physically close by holding her hand or putting your arm around her. [Read: 20 ways to make your girl incredibly happy and feel like the luckiest girl]
It may sound like a weird way of showing how much you love a person, but it’s basically the most primal way of doing so.
Aside from holding hands, you can also make your girl feel loved by hugging her constantly or by touching her face, shoulders, arms, and back.
It’s reassuring and shows her you’re not afraid to be intimate with her.
If you’re having difficulty expressing yourself through your actions, you can also express yourself using words.
No need for poetic speeches or rom-com lines. Just tell your girl why you love her. Come prepared with a list if you are especially nervous. [Read: How to communicate in a relationship – 16 steps to a much better love]
Sometimes, you need to go above and beyond just to show someone you care. We’re not asking you to drain your bank account. Just do something that requires a bit more effort than what your partner’s used to.
You can save up for a huge date or even a gift that she’s been eyeing for a long time, or come up with an inexpensive, but extravagant picnic.
Just make sure that you’re not forgetting more important expenses like bills, savings, and food costs. [Read: How to make a girl like you even before you ask her out]
Acknowledge the little things that your girlfriend does now and then. Maybe her nose twitches in an adorable way or she constantly checks to make sure you’re okay.
Tell her you love those things about her. That way, she’ll know you love and notice the small things, too.
Another great way to show a girl you love her is by simply showing your appreciation for her. Love isn’t just about telling your partner how your heart feels. It’s also about being there for her and appreciating her presence in your life.
Be grateful for her love and show her by saying “Thank you.” Hearing that feels just as good as an “I love you.” [Read: 16 ways to show your appreciation for someone you love]
When she’s feeling down or if she has a problem, prove that you care by doing your best to help her out. Even if it’s a simple need like her car running out of gas or getting a scratch when she trips, care for and rescue her.
Your girlfriend is probably an amazing person who can give Wonder Woman a run for her money, but taking time to do something small—something she can do on her own—shows that you love and appreciate her.
Run to the grocery to get her tampons when it’s almost time for her Aunt Flo to visit. Bring her coffee before she has to go to work.
If you want to show a girl you love her and care for her, it doesn’t have to be a huge gesture. It just needs to be something that shows her you’re willing to help her with anything she needs.
Women don’t need to be protected, but in a relationship, you should protect each other. Do your part by being there for her when someone tries to hurt her.
Whether it’s physical or emotional, do your best to defend her. If she feels like she doesn’t need you to fight her battles for her, just let her know you have her back and she’ll know that you’ll always be there for her. [Read: 35 small ways and gestures to make your woman feel special]
Don’t close yourself off to her life and interests. Spend time with her friends and family even when she’s not there.
If you want your girl to feel loved, watch her work sometimes, or spend a day with her doing her favorite hobby. Sharing your life is one of the keys to lasting happiness in a relationship, as it shows how much you care.
Make sure she feels welcome to do the same thing for you. Introduce her to your friends and family. Tell her all about your interests and hobbies.
Once she sees how much you want her to be a part of your life, she’ll be more than willing to immerse herself in your world as well.
People throw around the words “I love you” a lot, but many times, it doesn’t feel very heartfelt. When you tell her how much you love her, you should mean it with all your heart because she’ll know if it’s not true.
If you feel an overwhelming rush of affection towards her, say it without any doubt or hesitation.
It’s hard to believe that one of the greatest fictional acts of love in the world ended up with two dead protagonists *we’re looking at you Shakespeare* but this actually used to happen.
Men would engage in duels to win a woman’s heart. Some traveled long distances just to court a woman they’d only heard of. Some even resorted to kidnap – er, “eloping” just to be with their one true love.
The quest for love was never as easy as using Tinder. It was a lot harder to do, but a lot easier to prove once you achieved your goal.
Today, we’re still seeing the whole song and dance by people who run through airports or sing in front of huge crowds or hire huge crowds to dance for them. After all, the bigger the stunt, the bigger the payoff usually is. [Read: How to prove your love to someone – 15 very honest things everyone in love MUST do]
Traditions in long-established cultures used to require men to spend years courting the girl of their dreams. It wasn’t like the process most people are used to, such as going on three dates or waiting until you feel a spark.
Back then, you had to wait even if you had already fallen in love. These days, the wait is a little shorter, but the idea is still there: you need more time to prove you are serious about the relationship and prove that you can be trusted.
We live in the digital age, and because of that, some of the beautiful old-fashioned things have fallen away. So, instead of texting her how much you love her, why not do it by hand?
Buy little post-it notes and write little love sayings on them. Leave them for her to find in her car, her bathroom, or her lunch bag. She will be surprised every time she finds one, and she’ll also feel very loved.
[Read: 67 sweet but small gestures that show true love in the biggest ways]
Luckily for you, these are not the only ways to show how much you love your girl. Whether or not you choose the methods mentioned above to show your love, you still have to stick to what’s really important: being open and honest about how you really feel.
[Read: 25 signs a guy really loves his girl even if he doesn’t say it out loud]
It is pretty easy to show your girl how much you love her once you get the hang of it. Although it may seem daunting at first, with a little time and practice, you’ll be a pro at showing *and telling* your girl how much she means to you. Just remember that there’s no point in holding back once you feel it in your heart that you’re in love.
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