20 Ways to Win a Girl’s Heart & Make Her Want You Before Asking Her Out

You really like her, and now you want to know how to win a girl’s heart. Use these tips to impress her, and she’ll keep coming back for more.

how to win a girl's heart

If you want to know how to win girl’s heart, it takes effort. It isn’t about saying what’s on your mind to the girl you like. In fact, it’s the other way around.

The art of winning a girl’s heart is all about making the girl you like to fall in love with you without telling her that you like her in the first place!

You need to get to know her better, and then, you need to make her see you as a dating potential.

If you don’t know her yet, make sure you get her attention the right way.

[Read: 12 ways to get any girl’s attention no matter where you are]

And once you do get her attention, all you need to do is talk and charm your way into her heart.

How to win a girl’s heart effortlessly

Most guys make the genuine mistake of playing the game of winning hearts with their hearts.

Of course, when you’re in love with a girl, you can’t do anything but think with your heart. But if you really want to win a girl’s heart, you need to learn to still your heart and play the game of hearts with your mind.

Don’t let your emotions control the things you do and the way you express yourself, especially when she doesn’t like you back yet. You may end up portraying yourself as a clingy or creepy guy who’s desperately trying to win her attention. [Read: What makes a guy creepy? 24 signs and types of creepy guys all girls avoid]

Instead of trying hard to make her like you, just try to make her enjoy being with you. Before you know it, she’ll be addicted to talking to you and spending time with you!

20 effortless secrets to win a girl’s heart and make her dream of being with you in no time

Ever wondered why some guys are such charmers? They seem to win the affection of all the girls all the time. You can be that guy too, as long as you understand what it takes to win a girl’s heart. [Read: How to charm a girl and flatter her into liking you]

Use these steps on how to win a girl’s heart, and you’ll surely be on your way to impressing the girl you like effortlessly.

1. Be a great guy

Let’s face it, if you want to date a great girl who’s desired by several guys, you need to be a great guy too.

Here’s a good test to find out if you’re in the big league of guys. When you walk into a room full of guys, do you feel like you’re the coolest cat in the room? Or do you look at a few other guys in awe because they seem so much more awesome than you?

If you think another guy is cooler, or if you admire a few qualities about another guy you meet, it only means you’re lacking that quality yourself in comparison with that guy.

Each time you see a guy who seems *cooler* than you, work on that particular trait so you can get better at it over time. It’s the safest way to improve your own personality in the direction you really want. [Read: 20 traits girls look for in a guy to fall for him]

2. Talk to her

Make her feel special when she’s around you. It doesn’t matter if there are several other guys who are trying to get her attention.

All that matters is what you’re doing to win her heart. Talk to her warmly when you bump into her, and let her know that you’re happy to see her. [Read: What to say to a girl you like to make her like you]

3. Flirt with her

Flirting with a girl whose heart you’re trying to win is a subtle art. You can either make it obvious that you’re flirting with her, or you can be discreet and subtle.

Flirt with her discreetly, to begin with, and if she reciprocates by flirting back, you can start to get more obvious.

If you want to flirt with her, try to get some alone time with her whenever you can, and avoid flirting with her when there are others around.

Flirting with her when her friends are around will make your flirty lines seem like a joke. Save the compliments and the smooth-talking for private conversations. [Read: How to flirt with a girl the friend way]

4. Don’t be clouded by emotions

You know you like her, but she doesn’t know it yet. Remember that.

If you feel like your chances are slipping or there’s no reciprocation from her end, don’t get reckless. Most guys think with their hearts and end up professing their love for a girl when she’s just not interested in dating them. 

Don’t be that guy. Just make sure you stay out of the friend zone, and avoid telling her that you like her unless you know she likes you already. [Read: How to avoid the friend zone and make her desire you]

5. Don’t be threatened by the competition

Always think twice before you say something to her, especially if it’s not something pleasant or if it’s about another guy. If she’s been ignoring your calls or texts, or if she gives all her attention to another guy in the cafeteria, don’t behave like a little brat and sulk in the corner. 

And most importantly, don’t confront her about it. She doesn’t owe you any explanations.

Remember, winning her heart is a challenge, and every now and then, you’ll have to deal with other guys who want to impress her.

6. Occupy her thoughts at night

The nighttime is the best time to build intimacy. Start off by texting her now and then in the afternoons or evenings, and work your way to calling or texting her at night occasionally.

Talk about things that interest her, and over time, she’ll warm up to you and even look forward to talking to you every night. [Read: How to text flirt with a girl and get her interested in you]

If you know another guy who texts or calls this girl often, try to engage her over text or call her half an hour earlier and try to create an interesting conversation. If she likes talking to you, she’ll probably disconnect the other guy’s call if she’s having a great conversation with you.

Do this right, and you’ll make any other guy jealous. And chances are, he’ll get clingy or needy, and look bad in front of the girl in no time!

7. Open up to her

The best way to build a bond with the girl you like is by building a secret relationship that no one else knows about.

By flirting with her only when it’s just the both of you and by talking to each other late at night, it would be a secret flirty affair only the two of you know about, and that would make the whole relationship so much more exciting and mysterious.

Now take that to the next level.

When you’re talking to this girl late at night, tell her a few of your secrets that not many people know about, preferably about your past relationships *both of you will end up talking about sex within a few nights* or a few trivial difficulties you’re having with someone she doesn’t know about *she’ll give you advice on how to deal with that person, and would want an update every night*.

The more she knows about your personal details, the more easily she’ll start talking about her own secrets.

And once she starts doing that, she’ll start to feel closer to you, and think about you often too. As long as you avoid talking about something sad or gloomy, she’ll always be excited to stretch the conversation with you. [Read: How to get a girl horny and wet just by sitting next to her]

8. Win over her friends

If you do know most of her friends, try to be nice to them. This isn’t really necessary, but it can help you score brownie points if she ever does discuss you with her friends.

So does the girl whose heart you’re trying to win have a best friend? If she does have a best friend, then that’s the girl you need to please. Be nice to her best friend and get friendly with her too.

And when her best friend becomes a good friend of yours, “accidentally” slip the word out to her best friend that you like the girl. As long as you’ve impressed her best friend, she’ll turn into your evangelist and convince the girl you like to start dating you because you’re such an awesome catch!

9. Get her addicted to you

Unless you know she’s crazy about you already, don’t tell her you’ve fallen for her. Focus on having a good time with her, but at the same time, don’t try too hard to impress her.

When you make it obvious that you’re trying to win her heart by buying her flowers or saying something romantic, you kill the mystery. 

Let her wonder about what you think of her. Compliment her, tell her you miss not having her around, and even tell her that you wish she was with you, but don’t tell her you like her just yet. [Read: 20 ways to build the sexual tension with the girl you like]

And once you know that she’s definitely into you and likes you back, tell her what’s on your mind. 

10. Buy her small gifts

All girls like to receive gifts. And we’re not talking about buying her something for her birthday or Christmas. We’re talking about an unexpected gift at a time she won’t expect it.

You could buy her some flowers *even a single rose*, and get her favorite candy, coffee, or favorite of anything. The point is, you want to show her that you know what she likes and you want to get her things to make her happy.

11. Be selfless

Girls hate guys who are so cocky that they don’t even care about their needs and desires. So, don’t be that guy. You want to present yourself as genuinely caring about her and what she wants. [Read: Selfless love – 18 traits that sets it apart from selfish love]

You can show this in a lot of ways. Maybe she has a flat tire. Well, be the first one to offer to help her change it. Or if she needs to move, make sure you are the one to help her with those heavy objects. Whatever she needs and wants, make sure you provide that.

12. Ask her about her hopes and dreams

Everyone has dreams for the future. Whether it’s getting married and having a family or becoming a movie star, you want to ask her what she wants out of life. This shows that you are genuinely interested in her.

13. Compliment her

Girls love compliments because a lot of them have relatively low self-esteem. They are always criticizing their own body, personality, hair, intelligence… you name it. So, she will really appreciate you if you remind her of how awesome she is. [Read: How to compliment a girl – 15 must-know tips and 35 of the best lines]

14. Be a man of your word

No one likes a flakey person – especially girls. Unfortunately, a lot of guys say one thing, but then they’ll do another. It shows a lack of character and ethics on his part.

Girls want a guy she can count on. If you said you would take her out on Saturday night, then do it. Or if you said you would call her at 9:00, don’t wait until 10:00 to do it. Do what you say, and say what you do. 

15. Show her that you’re likable

She wants to know that she’s not the only person who likes you. Sometimes girls second-guess themselves about things like that. They are very vulnerable to other people’s approval.

So, if you are ever in a crowd with her and a lot of other people she knows, be friendly and charismatic. Get people laughing if you can. Once she knows other people like you, then you will win the girl’s heart for sure. [Read: How to be more social – 22 ways to genuinely connect with others]

16. Look your best

Let’s face it – sometimes guys don’t put that much attention into how they look. But, if you want to get her to like you, then you will have to think about that a lot more.

You can’t just not shower, wash your clothes, shave, or cut your hair if you want her to be attracted to you.

So, have good hygiene and dress fashionably. Buy some cologne to wear around her so she loves how you smell. [Read: How to dress to impress a girl and get more than just a second glance]

17. Remember the little things

Maybe she told you how a bully made fun of her in second grade. Or that her grandma makes the best chocolate chip cookies.

She will probably tell you a lot of little things about her and her life that you should make an effort to remember.

18. Be self-confident

Girls love confidence in a guy. They find it very sexy. Now, there’s a difference between true self-confidence and fake self-confidence.

Fake self-confident guys come across as cocky and full of themselves. You want to be the humble kind that just exudes confidence without ever having to tell someone how great they are. [Read: How to build confidence – 11 powerful changes to alter your life]

19. Be a gentleman

Contrary to what a lot of people think, chivalry is not dead! Well, at least it shouldn’t be.

Girls really appreciate it when a guy treats her like a lady. So, you need to open doors and pull out the seats for her. Pay for dinner, and do everything a man from the 1950s would do for his lady.

20. Consistent communication

Girls really hate it when a guy blows hot and cold. You don’t want to love-bomb her one minute and then ignore her for days. You have to be consistent with how often you talk to her. Be clear and dependable. You don’t want to leave her wondering.

[Read: How to tell a girl you like her casually over text and not come off pushy]

As long as you fall in love with your heart, and think with your head while impressing her, you could use these steps on how to win a girl’s heart and make her fall in love with you in no time.

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Vinod Srinivas Serai
Vin Serai
A proponent of chivalry and romance, Vin Serai sees himself as a gregarious gentleman with an active imagination, who still manages to spend more time living in...