How to Flirt with Girls: 25 Secrets to Help You Win Her Over

Learning how to flirt with girls isn’t something your dad teaches you, so here are some tips to keep you confident and charming.

how to flirt with girls

We’ve all been there. You’ve got a massive crush on that hot girl, and you really want to let her know that you like her. But you don’t know where to start. Luckily, you can learn how to flirt with girls.

You want to be able to subtly flirt with her and test the waters to see if you are getting a good signal back before you take the plunge and let her know how you really feel. Flirting is all about balancing the possibility of your interest.

However, while flirting might come naturally to some people, to others, it can feel nerve-racking. If just the idea of trying to flirt with girls gets your palms all sweaty, you can relax. Say goodbye to dry mouth, stuttering and stumbling over your words. Once you learn how to flirt with girls your confidence will shine through and you’ll be golden. [Read: What is flirting? The science behind it]

Why flirting helps

Flirting is what establishes a connection between you and someone you’re interested in. It is like small talk but with a bit of a romantic undertone. Flirting has a level of attraction buried within, but can really be any sort of talking between two people.

What makes it so useful is that it helps you calm your nerves. It gives you an idea of what a date might be like. Learning how to flirt with girls helps you gain confidence when talking to anyone. It can show a girl how good you are at listening, how funny you are if you’re a gentleman, and more.

Flirting is exciting and playful. That banter, teasing, or bonding over mutually enjoyed topics sets off a spark for a potential future whether that is one date, a hookup, or something more.

I don’t want to put pressure on you. Odds are you know just how important it is and that’s why you came looking for how to flirt with girls, from the perspective of a girl. [Read: Friendly or flirting? How to read the signs]

How to flirt with girls

You can learn about ways to flirt and practice your flirting techniques until you feel super confident and ready to approach the girl you like. With that in mind, we’ve come up with 15 great tips for how to flirt with girls. 

1. Smile

Smiling at her is a great place to start, especially if you are feeling nervous. Make sure that you maintain eye contact when you catch her eye, and don’t be the first to look away. Smile at her confidently.

If she smiles back, you can look away and then, in a few minutes, look at her and smile at her again. This will let her know you are interested. However, you can’t keep doing it all night as it might creep her out, so be prepared to approach her if she smiles at you back and start a conversation!

Smiling is also important when you are actually talking to her too. It shows you are a fun and friendly guy, and it will make her feel more relaxed. [Read: How to approach a girl you don’t know and impress her]

2. Use your body language

Make sure you pay attention to your body language when you are talking to her. It can be so easy if you’re nervous about clamming up and look like you’re not interested. Crossing your arms, looking at your feet, and turning away from her, and so on are all no-nos.

Be open and use lots of eye contact – hold her gaze! Use your body to flirt with her and let her know you are interested.

3. Touch her

Another easy way to flirt with girls is to touch them. A brush of the hand, or if you are sitting next to one another, let your leg gently touch hers. If she likes you too, she won’t move it away.

But, remember, any touching more than this, especially in the flirting stage, will do the opposite. Touching her hair, her lower back, or anything else is inappropriate and can be sexual harassment. you may just think you’re being touchy-feely, but touching without consent is never okay. The last thing you want to do is make her feel uncomfortable.

If she reciprocates your small brushes against her leg or an arm around her when walking, you know it is going well. If you’re unsure, ask her if she is comfortable. She will respect that. [Read: How to subtly touch a girl and make her desire you]

4. Make her laugh

Humor is the number one thing that most women cite when asked what they are looking for in a guy, so this is a must when learning how to flirt with girls. If you can make her laugh, she’ll instantly feel more relaxed in front of you and attracted to you too.

You don’t have to be a stand-up comedian to make her laugh, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Humor should be natural and easy and keep the conversation flowing, rather than bombarding her with loads of rehearsed one-liners.  [Read: How to charm a girl and flatter her into liking you]

5. Let her borrow your clothes

She’ll love wearing that big cozy jumper of yours, so always offer it to her if it’s a little cold. Make sure it smells of you too. A guy who smells good goes up a few points on the attractive scale.

A helpful tip is if she accepts your jacket she probably likes you. And if she ‘forgets’ to give it back, you should ask her out.

6. Compliment her

Compliments are always one of the best tips for learning how to flirt with girls, so make sure you let her know that you think she is attractive. If you don’t want to be too forward, something simple such as ‘you look nice today or ‘I really like your shoes’ will let her know you find her attractive without saying something that she might not like.

Make sure your compliments are sweet and thoughtful. Complimenting her on intimate parts of her body or being sleazy will have the opposite effect on what you are trying to achieve. [Read: 19 sweet compliments for girls that’ll make them go awww]

7. Be nice to her friends

Always, always make time for her friends. If she can see that you are making an effort with her friends, it will signal that you really like her and are willing to put the time in. If she is on the fence about you, she’ll ask her friends for advice, so it’s an excellent idea to have them on your side at all times!

8. Ask her questions

If you really want to know how to flirt with girls, you need to show that you are interested in her by asking her lots of questions. Don’t interrogate her, but find a balance. You want to show you’re interested, but not a stalker.

She’ll appreciate you taking the time and making an effort to get to know her better. Make sure you pay attention to her answers and then remember to ask her related questions the next time you meet – that will show you have been listening and weren’t just going through the motions! [Read: 20 funny questions to ask a girl and leave her ROFL]

9. Get to know her family

Getting to know her family is another way of showing that you’re interested in her and are willing to put time and effort into finding out about her. If you just met, ask about her siblings or what it was like growing up with an older brother or sister. If you know each other better than that, talk to her family when they’re around.

10. Do her a favor

Flirting comes in many different forms, and an act of kindness or doing her a massive favor shows that you are into her and are willing to do things to win her affections. Grab her some extra napkins, walk her to her car, or offer her a ride. Things this small can make a big impact. [Read: 15 ways to get your crush’s attention]

11. Buy her a drink

Sometimes simple is best. If you want to keep things cool and casual and simply start a conversation with her, just ask her if she’d like a drink and take it from there. This can be coffee too. Or, why not make it even more interesting and buy her a side of fries, so you can share.

12. Buy her a gift

A cute and thoughtful gift can be a great tip for how to flirt with a girl. Keep it funny and silly or related to a conversation you’ve had to make it light and flirty – don’t buy her something too serious or expensive early on, as it might scare her off. [Read: How to show a girl you like her – 12 subtle moves to win her over]

13. Be interested in her interests

Get to know what she loves to do in her free time, her hobbies, interests, and what she’s passionate about. Then you’ll not only have loads to talk about, but you might get into some of her interests too.

14. Text her

Text conversations are a great way to flirt with girls. If you’re shy this may be your go-to form of flirting. It can be so much easier than starting a conversation face to face. You don’t need to scream over loud music or worry about your breath.

Send her a flirty, funny text, and if she responds in kind, you can ramp up the flirting even more. Use emojis or memes to help if you are at a loss for words. [Read: How to start a text conversation with a girl – 15 rules to impress]

15. Tease her

Gently teasing a girl is a great way to start flirting with her. Everyone knows that little boys in the playground pull the pigtails of the little girls they have a crush on – so by mocking her gently, you are actually letting her know that you like her! Strange but true!

Just keep it simple. Tease her about the time it takes her to et ready or her weird taste in drinks. Do not be rude or insult her.

16. Ler her flirt

Sometimes the best way to flirt with a girl is to let her be in control. Follow her lead. Let her take things at her own pace. If she is interested, she will make it clear. This can also take away some of your nerves. [Read: What do women want from men?]

17. Don’t use pick up lines

Pick-up lines are cheesy and don’t really help you form a connection. Now, if you use one as a joke it can be a great thing to bond over. Or if you share the worst line you’ve ever heard and then ask her what’s the worst she’s heard.

Just don’t rely on a pickup line to do much good for your flirting abilities.

18. Consider why you like her

Why are you interested in her. Focus on that. Don’t put her on a pedestal as inhuman. She is just a person, like you. If you like her hair, noticed she smells nice or were drawn into her infectious laugh tell her that. [Read: 22 ways to get your crush to like you]

19. Find out if she is available

Flirting is all fine and well, but if you get your hopes up and then find out she isn’t available it can be quite a bummer. While flirting subtly, find out if she is single. Saying something like you’re boyfriend is one lucky guy or even asking her about how her dating life is going is enough to let her know you’re interested before flat out asking her out.

20. Keep the topics light

Try not to get into deep conversation topics right off the bat. Sure, it is great to connect over important topics, but flirting isn’t about serious talks. It is about creating banter and feeding off of each other. You aren’t finding your soulmate through flirting. [Read: 75 flirty questions to ask your crush]

21. Be open

Be willing to answer questions. Flirting is about the back and forth. Learning how to flirt with girls is about being open and honest. You may even need to be a little bit vulnerable.

22. Discover what you have in common

Talk about movies, books, and TV. These things are universal and you will connect over something whether it is a series or an actor. This helps you find a neutral topic to discuss, argue about, or just get excited about. [Read: What does being compatible mean?]

23. Talk about your pets

Everyone loves their animals and honestly, anyone with a pet could talk about them all day. This is a safe place to go about flirting. Are you more of a dog person but she has a cat? Let her convince you why cats are just as great.

24. Ask her out

Instead of depending on the subtly of your flirting skills to get her to ask you out, ask her out. Just go for it. The worst that happens is you get a no. And then what? You move on to greener pastures. [Read: How to ask her out on a date]

25. Back off if she isn’t into it

If you are flirting with a girl and she clearly isn’t into it don’t convince her, beg her, or be weird about it. Whether she says she has a boyfriend or just is trying to avoid you, do not push. She isn’t playing hard to get. The worst thing you can do when learning how to flirt with a girl is push too hard.

[Read: How to tell if your flirting is going nowhere]

Now that you know how to flirt with girls, what are you waiting for? Get out there, and get flirting! Good luck!

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