So, you’ve been burned by what you thought was love. You call BS on true love and vowed never to fall again. Well, a life void of love isn’t fun at all. And maybe you still wonder, does true love exist? Or is it just relegated to the category of the tales of Santa Clause and unicorns?
Does true love exist? 10 big signs that prove it does
Why not read up on these ten things, and feel those long-forgotten butterflies in your tummy. And believe in true love once more.
#1 Old married couples. Getting married in a grandiose wedding with an orchestra playing all the world’s love songs is one thing—actually fulfilling that lifelong commitment is another. Anyone can say they love their partners, but it’s until you stand by them through the tests of fate and time that you truly make true love come alive.
When you look at old married couples sharing a walk, holding hands, and looking at each other like yesterday was when they had their first date, all your cynicism dissolves at the sight of enduring love. [Read: 15 ways you’ll experience what real love feels like]
For the romantic, love may be all love songs and flowers and kisses. However, for the realist, it is the silence, the fights, the holding on through the years despite all odds that proves true love does exist.
When you see old married couples, you’ll know theirs may not be the perfect fairy tale relationship; but they stuck it through with each other, choosing love above all—and that in itself is the genuine kind of love so rare it doesn’t really happen to just anyone. [Read: Experienced words of advice from a couple who have been together for 59 years]
#2 Literature. Literature provides you with a profound window into the heart and soul of the writer and how he or she perceives the world.
Literature, whether fiction, poetry, or any other, paints you a picture of the depths and vastness of true love. From the characters of the story to the way the plot unfolds, you see how true love can be so real, so genuinely heartfelt, even through books. Such literature also moves and inspires you, as well as millions of other readers. It teaches you so many things about true love that you never even knew possible. [Read: 30 most romantic quotes from books and literature]
#3 Music. True love moves you, inspires you, and changes you for the better. Ever heard a sonata or a ballad that brings tears to your eyes? Ever go to a concert and feel a sense of euphoria? Or go to a concierto and be moved to your feet with heartfelt applause and admiration due to the sheer beauty of the music to your ears?
If you haven’t experienced true love for yourself, you feel it just by listening to a musician play his guitar, stroke the keys of a piano, or sing their heart out. Through music, you feel their love as if it were your own. You can experience true love as well as passion with every note and melody.
True love uplifts you and stirs deep emotions within you. Music is a beautiful expression of that love. You’ll be surprised to see the breadth of available music so pure and exquisite that you truly believe in true love. [Read: Falling in love: 50 perfect songs to enjoy that rush]
#4 Art. Much like music and literature, other forms of expression such as art show you true love does exist. Whether it is a mural from centuries ago to a modern abstract painting you happen to glance at on the street, art is a deep and immense proof true love exists. Even if you haven’t experienced it for yourself.
Artists have a power to translate their own feelings of true love—its loss, the happiness, its fleeting or enduring quality, or the chaos it sometimes brings—through whatever their medium is.
Whether it’s with paint and canvass, spray paint and the wall, or multimedia, believe in true love because someone felt it and captured it for you to also experience. That’s the way art works—to show you there are indeed multiple faces of true love for you to revel in. [Read: Am I in love? 21 signs to decode that fuzzy feeling]
#5 Married Hollywood couples. And we’re not talking about Ben Affleck and Jen Garner, or any other fairy tale Hollywood marriages that fell apart like some Greek tragedy. While the showbiz industry have been stereotyped with its instant marriages and divorce dramas, you’ll be dumbfounded to see that amidst all the glitz, glamour, and gore of Hollywood, there are those with living testaments to true love.
There are a number of Hollywood marriages that stood the test of time *and the flare of the paparazzi* and are shining beacons of true love, such as the marriages of Tom Hanks, Danny Devito, Michael J. Fox, Denzel Washington, Will Smith, Meryl Streep, and Goldie Hawn with Kurt Russell, as well as David and Victoria Beckham. [Read: 10 bits of love advice from famous Hollywood couples]
#6 Arguments and fights. Any relationship will have its substantial amount of tumult. It doesn’t mean that just because people love each other that things should always be perfect. In fact, it is during these downs in life that you measure the depths of love and say that it is indeed true.
However, let’s not confuse this with emotional and psychological abuse or physical violence. These are products of manipulation and power struggle in a relationship, which is not what true love is all about. Arguments, disagreements, and conflicts are inevitable in any relationship, and the test of true love overcomes these difficulties and rises above it all in a healthy, productive manner.
True love comes up with solutions and resolutions, and those who are in real loving relationships thrive and develop as a couple and as individuals through these growing pains. [Read: Relationship arguments – 23 dos and don’ts to remember]
#7 Differences. Imagine a couple together for many years and still happily in love with each other. They may have many differences. In fact, they may even be each other’s total opposites. And yet, they are in love after all this time.
True love doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t choose who it visits. Even if you imagine your future spouse in your head, you’ll be surprised that fate has something totally different to give you—but it works.
True love is not about being the same and drowning in a homogenous mass of being an identity-less couple. Accepting and understanding each other’s flaws and differences is what makes true love so exceptional—and rare. So, if you see a loving couple who are total opposites, ask them why they’re still together. You may learn a thing or two about true love. [Read: How to accept your differences for relationship success]
#8 Acceptance and forgiveness. While fights are mere bumps in the road towards long-lasting love, it is forgiveness that makes it so much more profound. Like Kintsugi, the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with gold, relationships ravaged by trials and disagreements can only be made more beautiful when you make amends and forgive each other.
True love is a strong commitment, a promise, to be there for each other through whatever comes your way. You don’t really have to be married to make such a commitment. It is through those dark hours of pain and the loud bickering that true love shines through—because you chose to look beyond all that and see that the love you have for each other is bigger than the things that try to tear you apart. [Read: 25 must-follow relationship rules for happy love]
#9 Your brain. If the things above still aren’t enough to convince you, look inside your brain. In a study, scientists scanned the brains of couples while they showed them pictures of their loved ones. The brain scans revealed viewing pictures of the people they love caused significant chemical reactions to their brains.
The brains of individuals who have been together for 20 years or more showed similar chemical reactions to those who have—wait for it—just recently fallen in love! Scientists show activities in the ventral tegmental area of the brain responsible for feelings of euphoria or pleasure and addiction. [Read: Mind games: How your body’s chemistry affects love]
They also show activities in the prefrontal cortex, which is associated with thinking, memory, and reward. And while science can’t still explain why romantic love happens and how it can be maintained, the studies revealed clues on what is necessary for love to last. This can be to love your partner like your love was brand new, every day.
Still, the brain also reveals similar reactions between new love and infatuation, so take special care to differentiate between the two.
#10 You. Look in the mirror and you’ll see that true love does exist. You have a desire motivating you to pursue your interests, career, passions, and other things. This desire moves you, and from this intangible desire, you make things possible, you make things happen. Aside from self-love, you have an inner fire burning within you that is a living, breathing proof of true love.
[Read: 12 real signs of true love in a relationship]
The world is full of evidence of true love, big and small. So does true love exist? Well, you don’t need grand gestures of love like in the movies. You can see true love in those quiet, mundane moments—if you only know where to look.
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