You’ll get your heart broken at some point. Maybe you’ll be one of the lucky ones who found their true love and never had to go through a breakup. But that’s not the norm and therefore, you’ll have to know how to mend a broken heart so you can find happiness again after being hurt so bad.
It’s not easy to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart. At first you’ll be a wreck but after you start to heal, you’ll learn to start living again. However, you’ll find that it’s harder to be happy than it was before. You’ll find less joy in the things that used you excite you like nothing else.
First, you have to get through the breakup
Believe it or not, breakups can last a while. You might think all it takes is a single conversation but occasionally, a breakup can go on and on and on. Usually, this is the case if the other person isn’t quite sure they want to leave you. They just keep toying with the idea and never come out and tell you up front.
Then after a little while, they finally give you a straight answer and you’re left to deal with the broken heart. The first step is getting through that initial breakup with class. Don’t reach out. Don’t drunk dial them over and over again. Leave them alone and try to cope by getting a solid support group together. [Read: 12 ways to deal with heartbreak the right way]
How to mend a broken heart so you can find happiness, and potentially love again
I know you’re really not thinking about finding love again right now, but you might want to know how to mend a broken heart so you can at least start enjoying your life again. Here’s what you can do to ride out the pain until your heart has healed.
#1 Get help from friends. Your friends are there to support you. They want to lift you up and help when you’re going through a rough time. Reach out to them and tell them what’s going on. Discuss your feeling and why you’re hurt.
Let them understand what you’re going through so they can offer help. Chances are, you’ve been on the other side of this equation before helping them. Let them repay the favor now.
#2 Find distractions. If you want to let your heart heal, you’ll have to find things to take your mind off the pain. The less you notice it, the easier it’ll be to get through. In time, you’ll find that it hurts less and less and the more you’re not thinking about it, the faster you’ll get through that rough period of time.
Spend time with friends. Do the things you find fun. Avoid lying in bed with nothing to think about but the fact that your heart is broken. [Read: 30 really fun ways to get distracted with friends]
#3 Keep living your life. Don’t stop doing what you’ve always done. If you have a hobby, keep doing it. Keep going out with your friends on the same night of the week you always have. Don’t stop living your life just because you’re heartbroken. If you do, it’ll only make it worse.
#4 Pick up new hobbies. You’ll probably have some extra spare time since you’re no longer in a relationship. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, take up some new hobbies. You’ll be distracted and you could also find something new you’ll really enjoy. It’s okay to take on a lot of different projects in order to find something you’ll enjoy most. [Read: 15 ridiculously fun games to have a good time]
#5 Read often. Reading is a great way to get distracted because you really can’t think about your own life when you’re reading about the struggles of other characters.
When you get super invested in a story, you won’t think about your own heartache for a very long time. Find some good books and start reading. Your heart will be mended in no time.
#6 Let yourself feel the pain. Don’t try to hide it away. If you need to cry, cry. Let yourself feel the pain of your broken heart because it is very painful. Nobody’s going to hold that against you.
Take the time you need to cry and then pick yourself back up and find a reason to smile. In order to learn how to mend a broken heart, you’ll have to get very good at crying and then cheering yourself up. [Read: 66 songs that’ll let you cry and help heal you]
#7 Get out as much as possible. It’s really easy to stay cooped up inside when you’re heartbroken. You don’t want to go anywhere or see anyone. That’s understandable. However, you need to.
Let your friends drag you out and have fun with you. This is a fantastic distraction that’ll also help you realize that there’s more to life than your ex.
#8 Think logically about your relationship. Take a step back and look at the quality of your previous relationship from afar. Was it really that great? It’s easy to have a skewed perspective when you’re with someone because you love them.
However, usually, the relationship wasn’t all that great to begin with. They dumped you. There were clearly issues. Take a step back and think logically about your relationship as if it was your friend’s relationship. This might help you see the truth of the matter and you’ll get over the heartbreak much quicker. [Read: 18 critical signs of an unhealthy relationship]
#9 Start working on building your confidence. Your self-esteem is probably shot. You were dumped. It’s understandable that you’re not feeling all that great about yourself but dwelling on those feelings of insecurity will only make things worse.
Hit the gym to feel better about your body and to get endorphins flowing. Focus on your positive traits and don’t let the fact that you were broken up with ruin the way you see yourself.
#10 Write down how you feel. Sometimes writing down our feelings helps us see what we’re going through from a different perspective. It’s easier to see the things we’re struggling with most when you write it down.
So start journaling. Talk about the pain you’re going through and how you feel every day. This also helps you get those feelings out so you’re not bottling them up inside. [Read: How to get your self-esteem back after a breakup]
#11 Try a rebound. Just be careful if you go this route. You can learn how to mend a broken heart by having someone else put the pieces back together. Just be careful not to get into a relationship with someone right away instead of using them as a rebound. This could have dire consequences.
#12 Give it some time. You won’t heal this breakup overnight. It’ll take some time. As a standard, give yourself three months. If in three months you’re not even feeling better, go ahead and seek out additional, professional help.
Feeling down and negative for that long can be a hindrance to your life. Fix it early on so you can be happy again.
[Read: 8 most common post-breakup mistakes you should never do]
Learning how to mend a broken heart is a useful process, but it’s not easy. You’ll have to stay tough and get through those rough patches before you can have some happiness again.
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