Some flirting is truly innocent. You see a cute person at the coffee shop and exchange a little flirty comment before grabbing your drink and heading out the door. But there are also certain forms of flirting that are actually harmful for your relationship – like Instagram flirting.
We live in a world where social media is nearly impossible to escape. All of us have it in some form or another. Instagram is definitely the front-runner when it comes to which social media is most popular. And that means you can end up spending a lot of time on just this app alone. That opens you up to trouble through it when it comes to your relationship.
Social media’s role in a relationship
If you think social media like Instagram doesn’t play a huge role in your relationship, you’re naïve. There are so many social media accounts specifically made for the purpose of showing what a “real” relationship looks like.
So not only do you have access to what your significant other is “liking” online, but you have the pressure of those expectations. You also want to show the world that your relationship is “perfect” by posting flattering pictures of you as a couple. The truth is, social media makes you feel like your relationship isn’t good enough. [Read: Why social media is slowly killing your relationship ]
How Instagram flirting is secretly ruining your relationship
You flirt on Instagram. It’s just the reality of how social media works. Even if you’re in a relationship, you still probably send those DMs, comments, and likes to a certain hottie. We all do it.
But do you realize how much Instagram flirting is ruining your relationship without you knowing? Here are the different ways it’s harmful when you’re in a relationship.
#1 It makes your partner insecure. Insecurity is a huge reason many relationships fail. One person doesn’t feel great about themselves for some reason and a ton of issues arise.
Instagram flirting is definitely a way to make someone feel insecure. They know that you’re out there flirting with a random person and it – for obvious reasons – makes them feel crappy. [Read: 12 things you do that make your partner insecure in a relationship]
#2 You’re not being completely faithful. Firstly, I’m a firm believer in other people not being able to tempt you to stray if you’re truly happy. However, if you’re engaging with others online and Instagram flirting, you’re not being faithful. And for obvious reasons, that can ruin your relationship.
#3 It causes arguments. Nobody likes to fight. That being said, if you’re always flirting with people other than your partner on Instagram, it’ll cause arguments. You’re betraying your partner. No matter which way you look at it, that’s what you’re doing. And it’ll make them mad. [Read: Online flirting – Are you cheating without realizing it?]
#4 Jealousy is prevalent. Having a jealous partner is horrible for a lot of reasons. Mainly because it means they don’t trust you. If you’re Instagram flirting, it means you’re giving someone else attention. And that will cause jealousy and jealousy often leads to much bigger issues. [Read: How to deal with jealousy in a relationship]
#5 You ignore your significant other more. When you pull up Instagram and are flirting with other people, it can be easy to get caught up in it. But that also means you’re ignoring your partner a lot.
This can cause a lot of problems with intimacy and the health of your relationship in general. If those issues don’t get resolved, it can ruin the relationship big time.
#6 It makes you think your partner isn’t good enough. This is just the biggest issue. When you’re Instagram flirting and hearing how other people may treat you if you were actually with them, it makes you doubt your partner. You see them as less than great. You start seeing them in an unappealing light. And that’s just not healthy.
#7 Your significant other can see your interactions. When you’re on Instagram, you can see what photos the people you’re following like and comment on. Which means your partner can see what you do on Instagram to a certain degree. This may cause them to get suspicious and even check your messages and comments. They will certainly get upset if that happens. [Read: Snooping in relationships – What it’s all about]
#8 You compare your relationship to the ones online. Instagram is full of other couples. It’s even full of single people who want to have a relationship that emulates that of the couples on Instagram.
This makes you see your relationship as inadequate. And if you’re Instagram flirting, you’re probably engaging with people who also want those types of relationships. It can make you judge your relationship far too harshly.
#9 You start thinking about being with someone else. This is harmful for so many reasons. Firstly, if you truly care about your significant other, Instagram flirting can make you start picturing yourself with that other person and not them. It can take your attention away from your current relationship and basically make you think you can do better.
But if you avoid flirting online, you’d never have those thoughts because you’d be able to better appreciate your true relationship. Those thoughts can definitely ruin your otherwise happy relationship. [Read: 14 valid reasons to end your relationship]
#10 You stop seeking the “thrill” of flirting with your partner. Most of the fun of a relationship is flirting and building that intimate connection. When you get that online, you’ll stop seeking it in your partner. That thrill will be lost and they’ll feel distant. This definitely hurts your relationship.
How to stop Instagram flirting
If you want to save your relationship, you need to stop doing everything that’s harming it – including Instagram flirting. Here’s how to stop this destructive behavior. [Read: Is flirting cheating when you’re in a relationship?]
#1 Spend less time on Instagram. Obviously, you need to get off Instagram. Spend more time in real life. The app is great for documenting fun and exciting moments in your life, but don’t forget to actually live in those moments.
#2 Don’t engage with others who are flirting with you. There are always those creeps online who try to flirt with you. Don’t pay them any attention. You’re in a committed relationship. Act like it. If you actually want to flirt with other people, then you may need to reevaluate your current relationship. [Read: How to stop someone from flirting and hitting on you]
#3 Appreciate the things your partner does offline. You don’t need to document every little thing your significant other does for you. If you start feeling like other couples have it better based on the photos they post, take a step back and appreciate the things your partner does for you every single day.
Something as small as a loving good morning kiss will never be posted online. So appreciate those little things and you’ll be much happier and won’t feel the need for Instagram flirting.
[Read: 15 real relationship goals most couples have no idea about]
Just because social media is everywhere doesn’t mean it has to be in your relationship, too. Don’t let Instagram flirting ruin a great thing between you and your significant other.
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