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How to Love Someone: A Guide for New Love, Old Love, and Any Love

We all love. It is part of the human experience. But, that doesn’t mean we’re doing it right. Learn how to love someone the best way.

How to Love Someone

Love is a huge concept that is different for everyone. Now, if you’re wondering how to love someone, I can’t exactly tell you how. You are your own person, and you have your own way of showing love. But that doesn’t mean I can’t help you along.

What is love? Can you describe it? No, probably not. It’s just something you feel deep inside of you. When you feel it, you want to be affectionate towards that person and show your love through kind actions. But it is more than hugs and kisses or saying, ‘I love you.’ [Read: 25 must-follow relationship rules for happy love]

Loving someone right

Loving the right way is an odd concept. Everyone gives and receives love in their own way. So, how are you supposed to learn the right way? Well, I can’t offer you a formula. This isn’t math.

But following some general guidelines and putting your own unique twist on them can certainly help you. Whether you are new to love, in a new relationship, or just want to be even better, you can love someone right.

You may just need a little inspiration. [Read: What does it mean to love someone?]

How to love someone

Every couple is different. Maybe you are physical or affectionate while your partner is romantic or prefers big gestures. There is nothing wrong with that.

But there are some things you can do, no matter how you choose to show your love, that can help create a stronger relationship between you and your partner.

Try out some of these things you’re about to read. There’s no one-size-fits-all solution to know how to love someone. [Read: How to show love with sweet gestures that don’t use words]

1. Accept them for who they are

The best way to love is by accepting them for who they are, including their imperfections. You cannot go into a relationship wanting to change the person you’re with.

Love is selfless. It celebrates the person you’re with for who they are. Don’t think you’re going to “fix” your partner. If that’s your plan, then you do not truly love them for who they are.  [Read: 11 sweet and intimate ways to show how much you care]

2. What’s your love language?

You need to know how you express your love and see how your partner expresses their love. The odds are that you two won’t do it the same. This isn’t a bad thing; it’s good to know how you two communicate. How do you two prefer to show your love?

3. Listen

It may seem simple but, you can show love through listening. If you don’t listen, how do you know who they are? Listen and get to know your partner. You’ll not only build a stronger relationship, but you’ll learn more about your partner. Get to know them, and you’ll love them even more. [Read: How to be a better listener in your relationship]

4. Talk, talk, talk

We don’t talk enough. Do you really tell your partner what’s on your mind? Do they tell you? Use your words to express how you feel towards them. If they make you happy, then tell them. If you want them to know they’re the reason why you wake up smiling, tell them! You don’t need to throw compliments every two seconds, but verbal compliments are always appreciated. 

5. How do they want to be loved?

Have you asked them how they want to receive love? They’re the only person who knows what they like and wants out of a partner. What does your partner see as love? What are their beliefs? This will give you a better insight into how they want to see their relationship. [Read: Love languages and how to use them]

6. What are their needs?

Love requires more than just holding hands and cuddling. What are your partner’s needs? What would help make their life a little bit easier? If you pay attention, you’ll notice what’s going on in their life and how you can make things better. 

7. Engage in their life

They probably have their own set of hobbies and interests that don’t align with you, and that’s fine. You don’t need to like the same things as your partner. Love is about showing your support and interest in their hobbies. Watch their basketball game or try painting with them.

8. Spend quality time with them

Time, time, time. We never have the time, but you need to spend quality time with your partner when it comes to your partner. This doesn’t mean you have to invest every waking moment by their side. But when you do hang out with your partner, take the time with them count. [Read: How to show commitment to your partner and make them feel secure] 

9. Everyone likes a surprise

This doesn’t mean you need to buy your partner a fancy watch or boat; a surprise can be small. It could be cleaning their apartment before they come home from a hectic day of work or getting them a ticket to their favorite local band. Surprise your partner, no matter how big or small.

10. Be easy on yourself and your partner during conflicts

It’s easy to lash out and yell during a heated debate, but that isn’t what you should do. During a conflict, be easy on yourself and your partner. Instead of yelling, talk things out. If you’re feeling anger, take some time to cool down before talking about the problem again. [Read: How to resolve conflict healthily and cut the drama]

11. A little space goes a long way

Love isn’t supposed to feel suffocating. You or your partner shouldn’t feel like you can’t do anything without each other. Love comes with boundaries. They should be able to spend time with friends and family, as should you.

Alone time doesn’t mean you don’t love them; it shows you respect them and the things they value in their life. 

12. Take responsibility for your actions

It’s time, isn’t it? If you want to have a healthy and loving relationship, you need to take responsibility for your actions. When you make a mistake, own up to it and apologize. It’s not easy, but it shows them you’re ready and capable of acknowledging your actions. [Read: How to apologize and say sorry to your lover]

13. Show appreciation

You don’t need to buy your partner expensive gifts, but they do need to be appreciated. If your partner cooked a tasty dinner, acknowledge it with a ‘thank you’ or do the dishes in return. Love isn’t just about feeling intense passion; it’s also about showing your partner you’re grateful for them. [Read: How to show your appreciation to someone and show your gratitude]

14. Compromise

Compromise does not mean you are giving anything up. It means your needs aren’t the only ones that matter. It means you are willing to meet in the middle. You don’t have to sacrifice. At least it shouldn’t feel that way. Making your partner happy makes you happy. [Read: How to compromise without losing]

15. Support

Be your partner’s biggest cheerleader. Never hold them back. Love is about offering a helping hand, a pep talk, or just a hug when they need it. Be proud of them and show them that.

16. Ask questions

Never stop learning about each other. When you are in love, you can think you know everything about each other, but there is always more to learn in reality. Keeping asking how they feel, how their day was, and what they want. We are always changing. this will help ensure you change together. [Read: Best questions to ask in a relationship]

17. Be there

Love can be as simple as being there. Show up. Sit with them. Hug them. Kiss them on the cheek. Sit quietly as they cry. Smile when they laugh uncontrollably. Just showing up is half of what love is.

[Read: How to prove that you love someone]

Knowing how to love someone isn’t always easy, nor is it something you can follow out of a book. But there are some things you can do that everyone will appreciate.

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The editorial team of LovePanky comprises relationship experts and real-life experts that share their experiences and life lessons. If you want the best love ad...