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72 Happy Conversation Starters for Couples Who are Getting Serious

Regardless of how long you have been together, you can always find something new to talk about. Here are some great conversation starters for couples.

conversation starters for couples

Every new relationship is a whirlwind of sunshine, peaches, romance, and all that beautiful, rose-colored jazz. However, once the fire fizzles and the dust settles, there may come a point when there seems to be not a lot left to discover or even talk about. That’s why we are here to give you some of the best conversation starters for couples.

You already know each other pretty well, and you may even pride yourself on being able to read each other’s minds and complete each other’s sentences.

But now that you have settled into the afterglow, things are comfortable, and even more so – predictable.

This is the time when things can get pretty boring, and so you two must make that extra effort to go deeper into each other’s minds, principles, and beliefs. You have to engage in deeper conversations that go beyond the motions, the mere pleasantries, and the romance.

[Read: The honeymoon phase and how to calculate how long it’ll last for you two]

Conversation starters for couples

So how do you find more subjects to talk about when you seem to have discussed all there is to know about each other, and everything else under the sun?

Check out these conversation starters for couples who are just getting serious—sit down and try out these topics—and maybe even take your budding relationship to a deeper, more profound level. [Read: How well do you know me? 40 fun questions for couples to grow together]

1. Do you remember the last time when you both laughed so hard you could cry?

Reminisce the best times you had and by doing so, you might be able to do it again.

2. When was the last time your partner made you feel good about yourself and vice versa?

This allows you to think about each other in a positive light and appreciate your good qualities.

3. What’s your favorite sexual memory together?

This can be about a fulfillment of a fantasy, some role-playing, or just a simple, quiet, and romantic night you shared. [Read: The top 50 kinky sex ideas worth trying at least once in your lifetime]

4. What event in your life do you think the term “scarred for life” applies?

This allows you to go deeper into each other’s experiences and understand how past situations changed you both.

5. What’s your plan for next year? In five years? In ten?

Discuss if you have similar plans and goals. However, if you have differences, talk about how you can work together to support each other and complement your goals with the other. [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility instantly]

6. What would you do if you won the lottery right now?

Discuss your plans, needs, wants, and how each other fits in the picture.

7. What would you do if we were not together right now?

How would things be if the two of you didn’t meet each other? Would either of you be miserable, happy, in trouble, or successful?

8. What were your misconceptions about each other?

For sure, you have first impressions about each other that were proven wrong as you progressed through your relationship.

9. What are your pet peeves?

Living together brings more discoveries—some you’d rather not know, and others you hope you can un-see.

10. What is your dream vacation?

At this point, you may have gone on a few vacations. Picture a dream destination—and maybe work on making it come true. [Read: Couples bucket list – 20 things every couple needs to do]

11. What would you like to change about yourself? What would you like to change about your partner?

Be real and honest. This is the ideal time for casual criticism, but make sure it’s constructive.

12. What gives you “butterflies”?

Know what excites and thrills each other romantically. [Read: 30 naughty question for couples to keep the spark alive]

13. What are your similarities? Do these help or hinder your relationship?

Look at opportunities to complement each other despite your differences, and see how your similarities can grow your relationship.

14. What is hot about your partner?

What do you find sexy about your partner?

15. What are your sexual fantasies?

No need to play coy and modest—say it now or forever be silent! [Read: The top 16 male fantasies and dirty desires every guy has in mind and the top 17 female fantasies that arouse almost all women]

16. What do you think about each other’s family? Parents?

Having good relations with each other’s family members can contribute to a harmonious relationship.

17. What’s the most romantic thing your partner has done?

This is another opportunity to show your appreciation for your partner, and also a way to encourage desirable actions.

18. What do you enjoy most in the bedroom?

You may know each other very well sexually, so this is a way to talk about the special things your partner does that make you feel good in bed. [Read: 20 things guys desire in bed but won’t ask for and why they hide these thoughts]

19. You get turned on when____.

Describe random, out-of-the-ordinary, or ordinary things that turn you on about your partner.

20. How has your relationship changed since you started dating? Has your relationship grown?

Take an inventory of your relationship and how you have changed through the months or years.

21. What do you consider as a deal-breaker now? What did you consider as a deal-breaker before meeting each other?

Talk about the time you first met each other and the early days you dated. Do you still consider those deal-breakers such a big deal?

22. When we fight, I wish you would _____.

Fighting is inevitable, but if there’s a way you both can stop it from getting blown out of proportion, then great. [Read: Relationship arguments – 23 dos and don’ts to remember]

23. What can your partner do to win you over when you’re not on good terms?

Discuss how you can both stop the fight and make up. What makes your heart melt when you get angry, and vice versa?

24. Do you still have secrets from each other?

Are there things and confessions you still want to say?

25. Who among your family and friends know you best?

So maybe you can hound them for any additional info and secrets about your partner.

26. When do you feel most like yourself?

Is there a particular activity you like to do that helps you unwind, recollect, recharge?

27. What is your guilty pleasure?

Do you like bingeing on Netflix series, or listening to 90s boy bands? Dancing along to Ariana Grande in the shower? [Read: 33 guilty pleasures that are best kept a secret]

28. If your life was a movie, who would play you and who would play your partner?

Would you like certain celebrities to play you? What’s the movie title and soundtrack?

29. Do you feel the most vulnerable now, when you first started dating, or before you met each other?

Describe what makes you feel vulnerable the most.

30. Are there goals that you have reached with the help or support of your partner?

What successes and triumphs do you think wouldn’t have been/be possible without the help of your partner?  [Read: 15 rules to be a good partner in your relationship and wow your partner]

31. What’s a perfect day with your partner to you?

Who knows, that perfect day may happen more often!

32. What is your bucket list as a couple?

Create the craziest, most outrageous, and most must-do things you should accomplish as a couple.

33. Who was your first crush?

Recall the things you did when you were a kid and feeling that puppy love feeling.

34. Do you still masturbate? What do you do and think about?

Come on, this is something you should already talk about if you’ve been together for quite a long while. [Read: 30 naughty questions for couples to keep the spark alive]

35. Who else from your family do you want the other to meet *and vice versa?*

Is there a favorite aunt or an interestingly eccentric grandparent that you think would get along well with your partner?

36. Who do you think you’re most like? Your mother or your father? What does your partner think?

You can talk about your parents’ endearing qualities, and this question can lead to more stories about family and childhoods.

37. If you could go back in time, what time in your life do you want to go back to?

Discuss milestone moments in your lives. Would you do them over or just relive them once again? [Read: Relationship milestones and 15 dating highlights you should be proud of]

38. What is your biggest regret? Your biggest triumph?

Talk about the highest and lowest moments of your life.

39. Do you think you know your partner best already?

See if you really know each other well: What 3 things do you think they would bring if they were going to be stranded on an island for the rest of their lives?

40. When can you say you’re truly successful?

Do you need tons of money, a high position in the corporate ladder, or become a CEO of your own company? What can make you say you’re indeed successful in your individual endeavors?

41. What’s your approach to money and savings?

This is an important conversation to have, especially if you’re getting serious in your relationship and even considering marriage.

42. What implicit agreements do you have between the two of you that you would leave if they were violated?

This gives you a chance to discuss the unspoken boundaries in your relationship. [Read: How to set boundaries in a relationship – 15 rules for healthy love]

43. In what ways do you complete or compliment each other?

Discuss your personality characteristics and how they are similar or different.

44. If you were sick and feeling miserable, would you rather be taken care of by your partner or be left alone?

This will give you a good guide for what to do when it happens.

45. Have you remained friends with any former lovers? If so, who and why?

With this question, you can talk about levels of jealousy.

46. If you lost your eye sight, in what ways do you think your idea of a perfect partner would change?

You can talk about the importance of physical attributes and attraction. [Read: What is pillow talk? How to use it and 14 cozy conversations in bed]

47. If you two were married and your partner inherited $100,000, would you expect them to include you on how to spend the money?

This will give you a chance to discuss finances and equality in the relationship.

48. If you wanted to have sex but your partner wasn’t in the mood, would you rather have them give in to make you happy or tell you that they want to do it some other time?

With this, you can assess more of your sexual expectations.

49. Do you think it would be possible to spend 24 hours together and not communicate verbally?

You can talk about the importance of conversation vs. silence.

50. Has your parents’ relationship served as a positive or negative role model for romantic relationships?

What would you do differently and what would you do the same?

51. If someone offered you $1,000,000 to run 3 blocks, naked, in a crowded city in broad daylight, would you do it?

This will show how adventurous, risky, and shy they are. And how much money means to them.

52. Do you believe in ghosts or aliens?

You can discuss any paranormal experiences you might have had or would want to have. [Read: 20 intellectual conversation topics that ignite meaningful communication]

53. If you were married and found out that your partner was selling secrets to your country’s enemies, would you turn them in?

This is a great ethical discussion and a test of commitment to one another.

54. If you could choose the sex of your child, would you?

You can also discuss whether or not you would design what they would look like too.

55. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one extraordinary quality, what would it be?

This will let you get a feeling of what qualities they find most important.

56. Is there anyone in the world that you envy enough to want to trade places with them?

Now you can discuss why they feel that way and what they can do to change their life now.

57. If you knew the world was going to end in a week, what would you do?

This gives you an opportunity to talk about bucket list items you should be doing together. [Read: Conversation games – 15 best talking games for fun and lots of laughs]

58. Would you like your spouse to be both smarter and more attractive than you?

The answers to these questions could get interesting!

59. If someone you loved needed a kidney, would you give it to them?

You can talk about the boundaries for this – who they would and wouldn’t give one to.

60. Would you have one of your fingers surgically removed if it meant that you could cure all diseases?

This is a tough one, but it gives you an idea of their ethics.

61. Would you ever go sky diving or bungee jumping?

You can assess their willingness to take risks – or not!

62. Would you be willing to give up sex for five years for $10,000,000?

This question could get sticky, but you can have fun teasing each other about your answers. [Read: The best deep conversation starters to impress anyone, anytime]

63. What number of sex partners do you think makes someone promiscuous?

You might want to set boundaries with this one – don’t talk about yourselves! [Read: The 87 best truth or dare questions that’ll make anyone horny just hearing them]

64. If you could increase your IQ by 40 points, but you would have an ugly scar on your face, would you do it?

This will let you know if beauty or intelligence is more important to your partner.

65. Would you rather be blind or deaf?

You can also expand this conversation to talk about what other disabilities they would have over others – if they absolutely had to.

66. If you had a voodoo doll and could hurt someone without them knowing, would you do it?

This question will let you know if they have a tendency to hate people or hold on to resentment.

67. If you were at a friend’s house for dinner, and you found a cockroach in your meal, what would you do?

This is a pretty gross question, but can be fun to hear your partner’s answers. [Read: 40+ meaningful conversation topics to get through any discussion]

68. Would you like to be famous? If so, for what?

Discuss all ways to be famous – from celebrities to book authors, and more.

69. If you could choose the manner of your death – and date – would you?

This will tell you how much your partner would like to know the future and their own expiration date.

70. If you were stranded on a desert island, who would you like to be with *besides your partner*? And what three items could you not live without?

You can talk about people you know – dead or alive – and anything they cannot live without.

71. How much money would it take for you to go for a year without showering or brushing your teeth?

If your partner says no amount of money, then ask them what their limits would be.

72. Are you comfortable going to a party alone when you don’t know anyone there?

If you’re in a new relationship, this will tell you a lot about their comfort level in social situations.

[Read: 60 deep and fun get-to-know-you questions for a new romance to peek into their soul]

These conversations are a perfect guide and some of the best conversation starters for couples. Use them to grow closer, and understand each other a lot better. And of course, make the effort to remember the answers as well!

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