You may have had your share of love experiences. But do you know the types of love that you’ll definitely experience in your life no matter what?
Love is a funny thing. It comes in so many hues and ways that it’s almost impossible to predict the type of love you’d experience until you actually experience it. But as confusing, happy or even painful as it may seem, love is still something we all look forward to experience. Throughout your life, you’ll find yourself in many circumstances of love, and almost all the time, you’d find yourself experiencing one of these types of love.
The Complexity of Human Emotions
You know how F. Scott Fitzgerald hinted at the vast spectrum of emotions, suggesting there are all kinds of love in this world when he said, “There are all kinds of love in this world but never the same love twice.”? It really gets you thinking, what does he mean by that?
As it turns out, the complexity of human emotions really does feed into the myriad types of love we experience. Let’s dive into why the landscape of love is as varied as the people who feel it.
First off, emotions are incredibly diverse. From the fiery intensity of passion to the solid, comforting presence of familial bonds, our feelings pave the way for different kinds of love. This diversity in what we feel is partly due to our psychological makeup. [Read: 32 reasons why you love someone, the psychology of love & why it exists]
As we grow and develop, our emotional experiences shape the ways we connect with others, influencing the types of love we’re capable of forming. Whether it’s the romantic love that sends shivers down your spine or the profound love between close friends, each has its roots in our psychological development.
Adding another layer, culture and society play significant roles in shaping our views on love. Around the world, various forms of love are celebrated and recognized in unique ways.
In some cultures, familial love might be paramount, while in others, romantic love takes center stage. These cultural perspectives can affect how we express love and even how we expect to receive it.
Societal norms further mold our understanding of love. They dictate what’s acceptable and what isn’t, influencing everything from who we love to how we show it.
Think about how societal changes over the years have reshaped our acceptance of different types of relationships and the recognition of love in its many forms.
The Types of Love
Without really getting into theories and styles of love that can just end up complicating your mind, let’s talk about real life and the experiences you’d feel in your own life.
Read these ten types of love and if there are some types that you haven’t experienced yet, don’t worry, it’s just around the corner.
And if you think a few types of love mentioned here aren’t really the kind of love your mama told you about, think again, because your brain sure does think it’s all truly an experience of love!
1. Philia *Platonic love*
Platonic love is the simplest of all types. There are no strings attached and no sexual intentions either. It’s pure, friendly and something we experience from a very young age when we still don’t know why we have the things we have inside our underwear.
The kind of relationships you share with siblings, close childhood friends and even a few grownup friends can fall right here. Do you remember the first time you missed a friend? That was probably your first platonic love moment. [Read: True friendship: 37 real friend traits & what it takes to be a good, loyal one]
2. Mania *Limerence and Crushes*
Ever had a crush on someone? Of course you have! The first crush is a memorable experience, one that’s filled with confusing jolts in the stomach, sudden urges to throw up and a stupid sense of grinning satisfaction each time you see your crush. It’s a beautiful experience even if it did feel like your life depended on it at that time.
Limerence, on the other hand, is rather close to a crush but much more intense and “weird”. Have you ever liked someone madly, but didn’t ever want to express your love for them, like a school teacher or an actor, or even a crush? Sometimes, you may have an intense infatuation for someone, but yet, you wouldn’t want to spoil the happy thoughts by doing anything about it. Ever been there? [Read: What is limerence really?]
3. Agape *Unrequited Love*
Unrequited love is a love filled with heartbreaks and one that almost all of us have experienced. It’s the dreaded one sided love, where you like someone and you know that person will never like you back. They may be in a relationship, or they may just use you. You find yourself falling more in love with each passing day, even though you know you’ll never get any happiness out of this type of love.
This is the type of love that gives love a bad name. But you know what, it also helps you understand the real value of reciprocal love. [Read: What is unrequited love?]
4. Obsessive Love
Are you an obsessive lover or someone who’s addicted to their partner? Do you feel helpless and lonely without that special someone in your arm?
Are you sure you’re not bordering on being clingy? If you’ve ever been an obsessive lover, there’s a good chance you’ve sucked the life out of your partner and pissed them off until they eventually left you on the curb.
Obsessive love is usually experienced by the novices who experience love for the first time, probably after having to deal with the scary unrequited love. Obsessive lovers are scared, insecure, and obviously obsessive about the relationship.
Now you may have been one or may have dated someone like this. It’s a stage all of us experience when we’re afraid of losing someone we love. But if you or your partner has security issues, really, there’s no hope for a happy ending here. [Read: Handling insecure relationships]
5. Philautia *Selfish Love*
Selfish love is smart. And though it involves two people to create that relationship, selfish love also involves two people who are in love with one person.
Your partner loves you. You love you.
In the case of selfish love, it’s all about self-love, but to a fault. Selfish love is a narcissistic love where you don’t care about your partner or their happiness.
You only care about yourself. If you ever find yourself getting into a relationship just for the heck of it without really falling in love with the other person, chances are, you’re a selfish lover.
Selfish lovers are clever, scheming foxes who only get into a relationship to see what they can get out of it. [Read: Are you being used?]
Ever dated someone just to appear cooler or achieve something for personal gains? If you have, tick the selfish lover off the list. If you haven’t, wait and watch yourself use someone at some point in your life. Don’t worry, it’ll eventually happen.
6. Storge *Awww Love*
Awww… that’s so cute. This type of love is the most spontaneous and yet, the one you’ll forget the soonest. It lasts for a few seconds, sometimes even less and some other times, a lot longer.
Do you love cats, dogs, goats… any animals at all? Or perhaps, a car or a tree? Sometimes, all of us feel an overwhelming sense of love for something or the other, and it doesn’t have to be a person.
It’s love at first sight, and yet, it’s not something you’d want to sleep at night with (mostly). We’ve all experienced the heart melting awww when we look at vacation photos or a tiny kitten or a pup on youtube. Been there and done that, and yes, you’ve experienced another type of love.
7. Philia *Same Sex Love*
Ever felt an intense burst of happiness when you see a friend of the same sex? You’re both straight, you don’t cuddle and you don’t grope each other. But somehow you just love this person, and you either have a man crush or a girl crush on this friend of yours.
Same sex love is an emotion you’d feel for your friend or even a celebrity, but it’s got less to do with sexual attraction and more to do with awe, respect and admiration.
8. Eros *Lusty Love*
Ever dated someone who got you wet with a hug? Ever had a crush on someone who makes you want to do things to yourself when you’re alone in bed? Yeah, you’ve experienced lusty love! [Read: How to turn yourself on easily]
Lusty love is the type of love you experience when you lust for someone or get into a relationship with someone you’re extremely sexually attracted to.
The first few weeks are all about sex and the positions, and both of you need just a few seconds of alone time to throw each other’s clothes on the floor. If a relationship of yours revolves more around the bed and less around trees and flowers, you’re in lusty love, my love.
9. Romantic Love
Romantic love, a mix of Eros and Storge, involves deep affection and passion. Butterflies, bliss and Louis Armstrong’s ‘what a wonderful’ is all you need to think of when you experience romantic love. It’s beautiful, sappy love at its best.
You feel the flutter of butterflies in your stomach, the world looks so much more beautiful and you can’t hold that grin back no matter what you do. You want to be with your sweetheart all the time, and even when you’re not together, you can’t help wanting to be together.
You’re happy. Your lover’s happy. The world’s happy for you. And you’re having the time of your life! [Read: How to know if you’re in love]
10. Agape *Unconditional Love*
Blessed are the lovers who experience this special type of love for each other. It’s not easy and it’s definitely not something most people even want to try. But if you do ever take a leap of faith, you’d see what true love really feels like.
Do you love someone more than you love yourself? Do you care about your lover more than you care about anything else is the world? Chances are, you may be experiencing unconditional love. Unconditional love is the stuff fairy tales and romance novels are made of. If both of you care about each other and love each other selflessly, you’re in the middle of a special type of love that few ever experience, but spend all their lives looking for. [Read: A sweet experience of unconditional love]
If you do want to ensure that you experience this tenth type of love, take a leap of faith and truly fall back in love with someone who loves you. Soon enough, with a bit of trust, communication and hope, you may just live through this grand experience that dreams are made of! [Read: 25 relationship rules that count]
11. Companionate Love
Imagine you’ve got a bond with someone that’s all about deep affection and lifelong commitment. Companionate love grows over many years and is founded more on a profound understanding and mutual respect than on steamy passion.
This common between long-term partners or very close friends who share countless experiences and support each other through thick and thin. This form of love is all about the quiet strength that underpins enduring relationships.
12. Familial Love
Familial love, or Storge, is the natural bond among family members like parents, children, and siblings. Rooted in familiarity and often a sense of duty, this form of love builds the foundation of your first experiences in loving others.
It’s characterized by a deep, instinctive affection that doesn’t depend on your personality traits or interests but rather on your fundamental connection as family. [Read: Family oriented: The meaning & what it means to be this person]
13. Infatuated Love
When you first meet someone who makes your heart race, that’s infatuated love. It’s a whirlwind of excitement and intense admiration that can feel all-consuming but typically doesn’t last long.
While it lacks the depth of connections that develop over time, this type of love can kick-start romantic feelings and add a spark to life’s routine. It’s thrilling, yet often fleeting, leaving memorable imprints of a heart-thumping phase of affection.
14. Enduring Love
Enduring love is like a deep river that’s been carving its path for years. Seen often in couples who’ve weathered life’s ups and downs together, this love is all about resilience, deep attachment, and a commitment that survives the toughest challenges.
Eduring love is a testament to the strength found in long-term devotion and shared life stories, evolving and deepening over time.
15. Altruistic Love
Altruistic love is about caring deeply for the well-being of others without expecting anything in return. Whether it’s helping strangers, loving animals, or contributing to the community, this love motivates you to act selflessly.
This is driven by a pure desire to make a difference in the world, showcasing the expansive reach of human compassion and generosity.
16. Nurturing Love
Nurturing love involves a heartfelt desire to care for and support another’s growth and well-being. This kind of love can be seen in parenting but also in any relationship where one person takes on a caring, supportive role.
It’s about encouraging and fostering the best in someone else, helping them to thrive and succeed through supportive love.
17. Appreciative Love
When you truly value and cherish someone for who they are, that’s appreciative love. This type of affection emerges from recognizing and adoring another’s qualities and virtues.
Found in relationships filled with respect and admiration, this love is where partners genuinely esteem each other’s attributes and are better together for it.
18. Rekindled Love
Rekindled love sparks again after being apart for a time, bringing individuals back together with a renewed passion. It’s often marked by a deeper emotional connection because of the time spent apart, strengthening the bonds through memories and a newfound appreciation for each other.
This type of love can feel like a second chance at happiness with a deeper, more mature perspective.
19. Sacrificial Love
When you think about putting someone else’s needs and happiness before your own, that’s sacrificial love. It’s considered one of the purest forms of love, requiring a deep level of selflessness. [Read: Selfless love: Traits that sets it apart from selfish love]
Often found in very committed relationships, this love underpins actions and choices aimed at the well-being of the loved one, epitomizing the depth of true emotional commitment.
How Many Have You Experienced So Far?
Love truly is a complex and multifaceted emotion, weaving its way through our lives in various forms and intensities. Each type of love offers a unique blend of experiences, shaping who we are and how we connect with others. Whether it’s the unconditional commitment of familial bonds, the passionate sparks of romantic entanglements, or the supportive strength found in a true friendship, love’s diversity enriches our lives.
And there we have it, the types of love that you’d definitely experience in your life, as long as you’re willing to risk a chance and take that plunge into the waters of love. So, how many types of love have you experienced so far?
