You like someone, it seems to be going well but then suddenly, you start to see a difference. You’ve been friend zoned. When you have a crush on someone, this is one of the single worst places to be! They don’t see you as an attractive option, they see you as a good friend. That would be fine if friendship was the only thing on your mind, but it’s not! The good news? You can learn how to get out of the friend zone and get your romantic interests back on track.
For those of you unfamiliar with the friend zone, lucky you! The friend zone is when the person you have romantic feelings for only thinks of you as a friend. This can often stop someone from expressing their real feelings, and perpetuate a one-sided romantic attraction. It’s even worse when the person you’ve been crushing on finds another person they do feel romantically towards and you’re left being the confidante.
The good thing about the friend zone is that you can be close to the person you like as much as you want. The bad thing is that this person might not even know they just put you in the friend zone, because they don’t know how you really felt in the first place. [Read: How to avoid the friend zone and make her desire you]
You need to move fast with this one. If you stay in the friend zone for too long, they’re just going to establish you as a friend. It’s hard to start seeing someone differently once you’ve already categorized them in your life. So, the longer you’re friend zoned, the less likely it is that your feelings will be reciprocated at any point.
It’s also possible, as we’ve already mentioned, that they will find someone they do feel warm and fuzzy about and you’ll be left on the sidelines, having to watch. Sure, it’s nice to be someone’s friend but that’s not all you want, is it?
A few signs you’ve been firmly friend zoned include:
When you start to notice these signs creeping in, it’s time to take action and learn how to get out of the friend zone, before it’s too late. [Read: How to make people like you: 35 tips to charm absolutely anyone]
If you’re reading this and panicking, thinking that perhaps you’ve been friend zoned for a little too long already, don’t panic. Simply follow these tips on how to get out of the friend zone and work fast!
This is the most short and sharp route towards getting out of the friend zone. They could have put you in the friend zone without even knowing that you have feelings for them—which is NOT their fault. If you’re in the friend zone by default, because you couldn’t muster up the courage to tell them, then you have no one to blame but yourself. Who knows? They could have feelings for you, too.
If telling them isn’t an option, because you’re scared, or nervous, or whatever lame excuse you have, show them how you feel. Act like you have feelings for them. Tell them you like their new haircut, or that the color of their shirt makes them look really good. Do things for them that show them you care more than a friend would. [Read: How to ask a friend out without risking the friendship]
More than likely, you’ve shown them the more intimate side of yourself. Now, we’re not saying to go make out with them, but make them picture you being someone’s boyfriend or girlfriend.
For example, if they start telling you about how this person’s boyfriend did this, come back by saying, “If I had a boyfriend/girlfriend, this is what I would do.” It gets their mind thinking about the way you’ll treat your significant other. You could also be very direct and say “if you were my boyfriend/girlfriend then I would …” They can’t ignore that sign, right?
People don’t talk to their friends like they do to their significant others. If that’s your end game, don’t let them talk to you like you’re their BFF. Don’t let them gossip about other love interests, or complain about them, either. Let them talk about anything BUT significant other problems. They’ll never think of you as a possible boyfriend or girlfriend if they talk to you about those issues.
Maybe you only treat them like a friend. Maybe they don’t think you’re that compatible. Whatever it is, there is probably a way to get around it. If they don’t think you’re compatible, for instance, you can make it a point to show them just how compatible the two of you really are.
No, we don’t mean go and slap their butt. Not at all. Subtly and nonchalantly make a point to touch them from time to time. Establishing physical contact will make them see that you’re being a little more than friendly.
A great way to do this is to just pat them on the back as you come up behind them, or touch their shoulder when they’ve said something funny. Little things that close the gap between you will move you out of the friend zone. [Read: How to build up the sexual chemistry with a friend you like]
For the love of all that is holy, FLIRT WITH THEM! One of the only things that can differentiate someone from liking a person as a friend and liking them more than a friend is flirting. If you’re continuously flirting with someone, you will send them a clear message that you like them romantically.
Not only that, but by flirting, you’re also opening up the opportunity for them to flirt back. This is a great way to lightly exchange some fun conversation that isn’t drawing attention to the fact that you’re stuck in the friend zone.
One thing that happens a lot of the time is that the people who put you in the friend zone don’t realize their own feelings. Many have actually been guilty of this, and then it’s too late. Don’t be that potential couple!
They may not realize how they feel about you when you’re always around. So, take a break. Don’t act mad, or anything, but just be busy. Be busy enough that they’re coming to you to hang out or to see what’s up. [Read: How to make a girl want you and think of you sexually]
Perfectly placed compliments can go a long way to get you out of the friend zone. Telling them they look great when they’re wearing grubby clothes shows them that you find them attractive, even when they’re not all done up. They’ll appreciate this.
Compliments can also help, because people ALWAYS feel the need to compliment you back—which means they will be looking for something attractive about you. It’s literally giving them a reason to look at your best attributes.
Surprising them with something that they wouldn’t expect you to remember is a perfect way for them to see how much you really care, and they will start to care about you because of your kindness.
Try bringing them their favorite cookies *that no one else but you knows they love*. This is a perfect way to sneak even more out of the friend zone! [Read: How to make a friend like you without asking them out]
If you really want to get out of the friend zone, then stop acting like you’re in it. Act like they’re your boyfriend or girlfriend. Treat them like you would your significant other, and you’ll be surprised how easily you can slide out of that zone.
Sometimes, you may be in the friend zone, simply because they aren’t in a place in their life that they can be dating or having a significant other. If you realize that and back off, they will notice and appreciate that, and then who knows? Maybe down the road, they’ll remember you being understanding, and it’ll make them like you more.
Now, you could try and make them jealous but this one carries risks. The reason is that if they’ve friend zoned you and you go and hook up with someone, they’re just going to be pleased for you. The key is to let them know that you’re interested in them first, in a subtle way, and then try making them jealous. It may work, it may not, but it’s one way to try and get out of the friend zone, for sure. [Read: How to make a guy jealous: 30 wicked ways to win his attention]
Sometimes, if you really want someone to see you as more than a friend, the best way to do that is to just accept that you can’t have them. This will lead you to forget about how you’re acting, what you’re doing, and you’ll just be yourself. That could really end up changing how that person feels about you.
[Read: Naughty ways to kiss a friend accidentally and get away with it]
Being in the friend zone doesn’t have to be a permanent sentence. If you’re trying to claw your way out of this dreaded zone, you’ll need these 14 tips to help you get out.
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