Sex in the office may sound exciting but it can bring problems in reality. So, what should you do if you find yourself having sex with a coworker?
We spend the majority of our time at work. That means office politics can be your best friend or worst nightmare. If you get along with everybody, it’s awesome. But if that goes further and you have sex with a coworker or even sex at work, you can take something fantastic and turn it horrific.
There is a reason most organizations discourage coworker sex —sex and work don’t mix very well. How can you concentrate if you’re thinking about a quickie somewhere in an empty office?
Some companies do more than just discourage sex with a coworker too, you can lose your job if they find out there is a romance going on.
So, if you can’t control the sparks between you and that sexy workmate, you need to know the right way to mix business and pleasure. Here’s how to have sex with a coworker without ruining your career. [Read: Work husband and wife – 49 work spouse signs you’re too close and rules to follow]
How often do people have sex with a coworker?
A survey found that 11% of people have had sex in the office with a coworker. That’s right, they’ve hooked up in a cleaning closet, got it on in the office, or even banged on the conference table! And 4% of those people even brought somebody in from outside the office to make love.
A surprising number of people actually meet their true love at work, too. According to another survey, 31% of people who have sex with a coworker end up getting married. This is higher than the percentage of people who meet through friends *11%*, online *10%*, or at school *8%*.
While it sounds like a lot of fun, it’s important to note that 14% of those who had sex at work were caught and faced consequences. That’s not a massive number, but it’s a lot higher than zero, and it doesn’t include reactions from coworkers.
So if you’re considering trying it, prepare yourself to face your boss’s or anybody else’s wrath in the office. [Read: 31 new things to try in bed at least once with your lover]
Why is sex in the office so hot?
We all know that having sex in the office is a great fantasy. That’s why there have been so many porn videos made around that very idea. If you work in an office, chances are you’ve thought about it before.
But why? The truth is, this fantasy is so hot because it’s one that so many people can relate to and can even make happen.
Fantasies that are so close to being a reality get people really worked up and excited – and that’s why having sex in the office is just so damn hot. [Read: Lusty signs of sexual attraction to keep an eye on]
Is sex in the office really worth it?
If you’ve started a work-based romance and are fantasizing about having sex in the office, there may be a few things running through your mind – and we’re not talking about whether or not you should have sex on the copier.
You may be thinking about the policies you could be breaking and whether or not you’ll get fired.
Having sex in the office may be a really hot fantasy, but there are also a few things that you should think about before stripping down and boning on your office desk. [Read: Top ten female fantasies]
The pros of sleeping with a coworker
Don’t get us wrong—there are benefits to having sex with coworkers. A big one is you get to hang out with the person you have romantic feelings for daily, get to know them, and have their full attention.
So, what are the main plus points of having sex in the office with someone you work with?
1. You get to see them every day
When you start having sex with someone or begin a relationship, there is nothing more you want than to be with them every second of the day. When you work together, that means endless time together. [Read: How much time should couples spend together – 24 clues to your number]
2. You get to know them well
The basis of any good relationship is getting to know someone and what makes them tick. When you work together, you see how a person handles stress, keeps a cool head *or doesn’t at all*, and what they are like in good times and on the bad days.
That helps you if you ever take coworker sex one notch higher, like a lasting relationship.
Some things are best left unknown about the people we sleep with. For instance, watching them screw someone over for a promotion isn’t very attractive.
The things we get to know about someone in a workplace atmosphere change the way we feel about them personally. [Read: 30 ways to get to know someone, open up to them, and create a genuine bond]
3. You are more enthusiastic about going to work
When you have sex with a coworker, going to work to see their bright shining face *and other assets* is like a dream come true. Think about the couple of times you go out on dates, you get to do that every morning!
If your relationship is going well, then you’ll look forward to seeing the person. Going to work becomes a joy. [Read: Workplace flirting – 28 subtle signs a coworker is flirting with you]
4. You can combine sex and teamwork
Working as a team is even better when you celebrate with good sex! Plus, teamwork brings you in sync with someone and makes sex that much more enjoyable.
However, you might also just work late nights together. We say *work*, but you might not actually get anything done. [Read: Coworker crush – why we fall for colleagues and how to pursue it or drop it]
5. Sneaking around might add some excitement
There is something awesome about sneaking around to have sex. It’s like being back at your parent’s house with an old boyfriend or girlfriend and having a quickie.
Sex with a coworker can be a real thrill for some, just because of the naughtiness of it. Office policy may forbid it, which makes it that much more exciting. [Read: Emotional affair – what it is, 76 signs and steps, infidelity stages, and what to do]
6. You get to brag about sex with your coworker
Coworkers talk about each other in private, let’s be real. If you bang the office hottie, then you get bragging rights. Yet it could also cause jealousy. If you sleep with a coworker someone else in the office is crushing on, they could find out and it might create a firestorm.
7. It might lead to finding your soul mate
Not all coworker sex relationships end on bad terms. There are times when you meet the person of your dreams at work. Some jobs are just transient. So if you have a connection with someone, then it might be worth taking a chance to find love when you’re in a job that you don’t really care about.
The average person goes through many workplaces throughout their lives, but you only get one soul mate. You never want to look back and think you didn’t give it a try because it was against the rules.
8. You’ll get to live out your fantasy
Lots of people have a fantasy about having sex in the office, and you get to tick that off your sexual bucket list! And even if it’s not as great as you expected, you’ll still get to say you made it come true.
A lot of people find the taboo of sleeping with a coworker pretty delectable and if that’s you and you find someone you can’t keep your eyes off at work, well, why not go for it? [Read: Mutual fantasy – how to fantasize about someone else while having sex]
9. It could help you focus better
Some people just can’t focus on getting their work done when their sexual energy is too high. If this sounds like you, then you may actually benefit from having sex in the office.
It could increase your work energy and get you back on track by getting rid of that distraction. Then, watch your productivity levels soar!
10. You’ll be more relaxed at work after the act
If your thing is to have sex in the office while everyone else goes out for lunch, you will be SO much more relaxed after the lunch hour, and it’ll make work so much easier to handle.
The afternoon will fly by and everyone will wonder why you’re suddenly in such a wonderful mood! [Read: Tips to keep in mind when you date your boss]
11. You’ll get a confidence boost
Anyone who has a sexy little secret is always more confident. If you’ve been fooling around in the office but none of your coworkers know, you will start to get a confident edge that is really powerful.
Of course, confident people take initiative and show that they know what they’re doing – qualities that your boss would love to see in you. And when they see how confident you are, they’ll be more willing to assign you bigger projects and potentially give you that promotion.
12. It brings you closer to your partner
Having sex in the office actually takes a lot of effort from both you and your partner. In order to get there at the right time, stay quiet, and then have them leave without anyone the wiser takes some skill and planning.
You have to work with your partner to make it happen successfully. This could end up bringing the two of you closer. Not to mention that they’ve just helped you complete a fantasy of yours; you’ll appreciate them much more for it. [Read: Weird, unique ways to build intimacy with your partner]
13. You get to be creative with your planning
Adding some creativity to your sex life is never a bad thing. So bring some positions from the office back home. Having sex at work really makes you think outside the box about how to stay quiet and make sure no one catches you. [Read: Tired of monogamous sex? 20 racy ways to keep it spicy]
The cons of sleeping with a coworker
On the flip side, there are a lot of reasons your interoffice relationship may NOT be worth the risk. These reasons should make you think twice before stripping down and getting it on at work.
1. You could lose your job
This is the worst-case scenario of sleeping with a coworker. Many, many companies have policies regarding this, and in most cases, it’s completely forbidden.
Having sex in the office is a huge liability for the company. Yes, doing it on top of that wooden desk may be hot, but it’ll also get you fired if you’re caught *or if word gets out and eventually makes it to your boss*.
2. Your reputation could be tarnished
If your boss never finds out and you’re safe from being fired, your reputation may still be completely ruined. When your coworkers find out that you’ve had sex at work, they may lose respect for you, and that is bad for your work environment. [Read: Sexual fetishes bordering on crazy]
If your boss catches wind of a rumor that you’ve been banging somewhere in the building, they’re going to lose respect for you as well, and that alone could cost you a big promotion.
You may have been perfect at the job and worked your ass off. But if you’ve been sleeping with someone at work, you may have to kiss it goodbye.
4. You’ll ruin the fantasy
Basically, you might be disappointed. The truth is that sometimes we build up these fantasies so much in our minds that we’re disappointed and upset when we finally get to live them out. Do you really want to ruin the best fantasy you’ve got? [Read: Awkward signs you’re having bad sex with your lover]
5. It could affect your future employment prospects
If you do end up getting fired for having sex at the office, it’ll be really hard for you to get another job.
Imagine your new employer calling up your ex-boss to ask why you got fired. We’re sure they’re not going to be very excited to hire someone that has sex at work. [Read: Best and hottest places for outdoor sex]
6. You will be easily distracted
Having sex in the office will completely change how you see it. You may get distracted by thinking back to when you had sex there, and you won’t get nearly as much work done.
Over time, your boss is going to notice that your productivity levels have fallen and they’re going to want to know why. You can’t exactly tell them the truth, can you?
7. You could have to be very quiet
Lots of people hate having to be quiet during sex. In some ways, it ruins things and distracts you from having fun. That’s why many would rather stick to boning at home.
Not to mention, quiet sex is also awkward sex. Nothing but the sound of two bodies slapping together and heavy breathing. It’s really just not appealing. [Read: Floppies and awkward things that happen during sex]
8. The tension and anxiety could ruin the mood
Some people may find the thought of getting caught to be a big turn-on. Yet, many feel they would be way too nervous and distracted. In that case, the sex wouldn’t be fun.
The thought of someone barging in and seeing you both getting it on could make you not enjoy it at all and lots of people feel this way too. [Read: Quick and easy ways to deal with nosy co-workers]
The dos and don’ts of sleeping with a coworker
As we’ve established, sleeping with a coworker can be a lot of fun, but it can also be a lot of drama. So before you get hot and heavy, there are a few things you should know and some basic rules to follow so you don’t get burned.
1. DO calculate your risk, and move slowly and discreetly
Don’t get too intense too quickly. Get to know the person you’re interested in and understand what it is about them that really turns you on. Is it actually them you’re attracted to, or is it just the situation?
Take things slow and let the relationship develop naturally. If you rush things, you could end up jumping into a decision that you regret. If things don’t work out, it could make it really awkward at work. [Read: How to flirt with a guy at work without crossing any lines]
2. DO be honest with yourself and your coworker
What do you actually want from this relationship? Do you want a long-term romance or just a sexy fling? And what about the coworker you’re hooking up with?
Make sure you’re both clear and honest about what you expect from the relationship.
Also, even though relationships can end suddenly, you should protect your career by starting responsibly. It’s important to acknowledge that no relationship is guaranteed to last and to discuss how you would handle yourselves if this one ended.
3. DON’T tell anyone about it until you’re serious
Before you announce your relationship to your coworkers, make sure you’re ready for the whole office to know. Imagine that every single person—from the coffee boy to the CEO—knows that you’ve been hooking up. Would you be okay with that? [Read: The subtle ways to hint and flirt with a coworker and see if they like you]
Also, be very careful with what you post online. Once something is online, it’s very difficult to take it back. Especially if things go south. You might be happy to announce that you’re together, but do you really want them to know when you break up?
4. DO own up if you get caught
If you get caught having sex with a coworker, the best thing to do is to own up to it. Don’t try to deny it or make excuses. Just be honest and apologize for any trouble you’ve caused.
If you’re sincere, your boss or HR department is more likely to be understanding and less likely to punish you. Or, they may decide to take disciplinary action, such as a warning or suspension, or even firing.
Whatever happens, just be prepared to face the consequences of your actions, and be respectful of your boss’s decision. [Read: 34 subtle signs a coworker likes you and is deeply infatuated by you]
5. DO respect your colleagues
You know how they say, “You can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family”? Well, the same goes for your colleagues. You might not have chosen to work with them, but you do have to choose how you interact with them.
Don’t assume that they want to know about you having sex with a coworker. They’re not your besties, and they have a right not to know the dirty details of your personal life. Sometimes, it’s better to leave things on a need-to-know basis.
6. DON’T have casual sex with a coworker
This is all part of being careful and considerate. Don’t risk throwing away your career over nothing. If you’re thinking about getting down with a coworker, make sure it’s not just for a one-night stand. It’s not worth the risk of making things awkward at work just for one night of fun.
If you’re really desperate for no-string sex, find someone you’re interested in outside of the office. It’s impossible to have casual one-off sex with a coworker you see every day and not forever change your relationship. [Read: 20 signs a coworker is sexually attracted to you and wants to seduce you]
7. DO stay away from married co-workers
Responsible sex 101: don’t have sex with married people. The same goes for having sex with a married coworker. Never seduce somebody who’s married, or who is already in a committed relationship.
It’s not only stupid, but it’s also dangerous. You don’t want a jealous spouse reporting your bad behavior to your boss.
On the other hand, having sex with a married coworker is just cruel. Think of their partner and how betrayed they’d feel if they found out. You don’t want to be a nasty person, so just leave that coworker alone if they’re already taken. [Read: How to tell if a guy likes you at work – 15 signs he’s hitting on you]
8. DO keep it simple and quick
This isn’t the time for elaborate positions and long-winded sex sessions! Unless you are trying to get caught, that is. Instead, choose quickies. They can be just as much fun and they come with a much lower risk factor involved.
9. DON’T gossip about it
Look, we know you’re all excited about the fact you’ve just got down and dirty with the office hottie, but it’s not wise to go gossiping about it, even if you think you know your coworkers well.
Someone may not take kindly to it, some might find it offensive, and everyone else simply doesn’t care. Keep it to yourself. [Read: How to show respect in a relationship and love each other better]
10. DO think twice about sleeping with your boss
Lots of people do it, but it’s really not a wise move. Firstly, if anyone finds out, they might think you’re sleeping with your boss to get ahead. That’s all respect gone.
Secondly, if it goes wrong, can you imagine how mortifying and difficult your working days are going to be? It’s best to avoid your boss like the plague and live out any fantasies you have in your head.
11. DON’T sleep with your subordinate
You won’t be seen as someone who deserves respect if you go around sleeping with your subordinates.
It’s in the same category as sleeping with your boss, just flipped around. It’s best to avoid these types of situations as they can turn quite messy, very quickly. [Read: Reasons why relationships are such hard work]
12. DO have fun
At the end of the day, if you’re going to take all the risks and have sex in the office, you have to enjoy it, right? What’s the point in doing something with so many pros and cons stacked against each other if you’re not having a great time?
So, if you do it, make sure you really enjoy it.
What are you going to do?
The fact that you’re reading this in the first place tells us that you’re crushing on someone in the office and you’re considering making a move.
So, now you know all the facts about sex in the office and sleeping with a coworker, what are you going to do?
Take your time and make a measured decision. Sometimes, the best fantasies stay in our heads. While living them out might be exciting and something to tick off a list, if they don’t live up to your expectations or they lead somewhere troublesome, are they really worth it?
[Read: Sexual bucket list – 35 dirty deeds to build your naughty wishlist]
Sleeping with a coworker can be a lot of fun, but it’s important to be careful. Before you have sex in the office, make sure you’re ready to put your heart on the line. And be prepared for some awkward moments in the break room!