Learning how to describe yourself online properly can be the difference between attracting the right attention and the wrong attention.
When it comes to your social media image, you have to be VERY careful about which words to use to describe yourself. This can have a huge impact on how people perceive you. From Facebook, to LinkedIn, to Tinder—and all other platforms in between—the words you use embody you and give people an idea of what you’re all about. That’s why you need to learn how to describe yourself online in the right way.
When it comes to online dating, people are looking for someone with the right mix of personality. Your profile is your only way to convey that mix, which will then urge them to get to know you better.
Far too many people have terrible online profiles. They don’t know it, but they’re making some of the worst kinds of mistakes. You might think you’ve built up a fantastic profile, but there is a huge amount of room for misunderstanding in the online world.
The good news is that we’ve put together a guide to help you learn how to describe yourself online fantastically well. No more misunderstandings! [Read: Social media and relationships – The good, the bad, & the ugly]
How to describe yourself online
While selecting the right profile picture can be easy, the rest of your profile is where the real challenge begins. What words should you choose? There are thousands of words out there that can be used to describe yourself on social media and online dating. [Confession: I used a dating site without a photo and this is what happened]
Let’s break it down.
Best words for men to use
1. Physically fit
Apparently, there are still people out there who are looking for a manly man in terms of physique. This goes back to basic biological instincts, which associate physically fit guys with the ability to protect and provide for them. Move over, dad bod.
You may want to entice women by saying that you are a made man in the sense that you have a career going and you’re trying to climb up the ladder of success. This means you can provide for them—or at least you don’t live with your mom anymore. [Read: Love or career – How to make the right choice]
Women will see you as a man who is sensitive and observant, which is a huge plus. Just be sure that you don’t bring her carnations on your first date when she explicitly mentioned she loves hyacinths. [Try: Important dos and don’ts of online dating]
Of course—passion. Whether this means you’re great in bed, you go all out in the name of love, you’re romantic, or you are just deeply into the things that you like doing, putting “passionate” on your profile will draw the girls to you.
Say you’re a glass-half-full kind of guy. After all, no one likes to be around someone who is nasty or negative. Saying you’re optimistic conveys your positive outlook, which people—and not only women—are drawn to.
Many studies have shown that women are attracted to a man with a good sense of humor. Injecting this in your profile will definitely make them look forward to sharing a laugh with you. [Read: Reasons why online dating isn’t for everyone]
Put this in your profile and you’ll have women thinking about going on adventures and spur-of-the-moment dates with you—all in all, it shows that you’re just pure, plain fun. This also conveys how you can go with the flow and be alright with whatever life throws at you.
Many women are looking for a deep, sensitive type of guy—the ones who may be brooding, but are romantic enough to be worth dating.
Apparently, women like their men to be affectionate, which means they like guys who are not afraid to show their love. Chivalry is not dead, but neither is the expression of affection. [Check out: 20 types of touches and what each touch really means]
No one likes a stuck-up guy, so saying you’re “outgoing” may just make women want to meet up with you even more.
Best words for women to use
Guys think of women as delicate creatures—a soft ray of sunshine in their lives. So it’s no wonder “sweet” is one of the best words you can use to describe yourself if you’re looking to date guys online.
Sugar has to be paired with some spice, and nothing can turn on guys more than a go-getter type of girl who doesn’t really need a man to pay her way *but guys will probably want to shower you with gifts, anyway*. [Try: Ways to make a man fall in love with you instantly]
When you write this, guys will expect you to cook them chicken soup when they’re sick, know their favorite football team, greet them cheerfully in the morning, wish them luck on their big day at work, and just be… well… thoughtful.
When you say spontaneous, be ready to go with him on adventures, from parasailing to skydiving, and maybe even just a day watching UFC with him. Who knows? You have to be spontaneous, right?
5. Physically fit
Now, this is a no-brainer. Men like their women in their best health—or figure. Whether you’re an hourglass, supermodel-thin, or full-figured, what draws men is the fact that you’re active and hot! [Not a fan of fit? Read: Weird dating websites for those with unusual tastes]
Men like it when you laugh at their jokes, so let them know you also have a good sense of humor. You can not only laugh at their jokes *genuinely*, but also throw some good punchlines into the mix.
No one wants to be with someone who has a stick up their ass—not even guys. You have to be able to just go out there and go with the flow.
If you’re a Debbie Downer, then prepare to repel people. If you want to attract guys to your profile, you have to put “optimistic” there, so they know you are positive, cheerful, and likable. [Try: Annoyingly common misconceptions about online dating]
You have to put it out there: you are working on it and working for it. This ups your respect and va-va-voom factor, especially if they can see the fruits of your labor in your photos.
Same as guys, you have to show that you are more than looks and success—you have heart, too. Whether it’s in terms of how you are in bed or in a relationship, saying you’re passionate will definitely make men want to get closer to you.
Words you should always avoid when describing yourself online
Meanwhile, here are words to avoid for both men and women.
Seeing this on your profile just brings to mind that your date will be talking and talking… while you say nothing. It’s basically admitting that you’re boring. [Read: How to spot the liars on an online dating site]
On the other end of the spectrum, being energetic can be associated with someone too talkative or just plain exhausting.
We’re guessing no one wants someone who calls them “sir” or “ma’am.”
Let’s face it, not everyone is into spiritual and new-age shiznits, so let’s put all the spiritual talk away for when you get to know each other better. [Check out: 30 effective tips to help you win at online dating]
These days, if you have it, flaunt it—even on social media. Modesty is not a thing anymore, as people want to see what you’ve got right from the get-go.
Kindness is a priority for those looking for mates, but that goes without saying.
7. Good listener
Again, no one wants a good listener and not a good talker. You have to show that you can carry a conversation well on both ends.
People don’t want a mom, they want a date. [Try: Why do all the nice guys suck at online dating?]
If they’re looking for a pet, this can be a good thing. When it comes to romantic relationships, though, this is a given.
Just like “loyal”, this term is too uppity and doesn’t belong in the vocabulary of those who are looking for dates—although you have to be dependable when you set your first date.
There you have it, guys and gals, the best words to describe yourself online, whether on social media or online dating sites. Remember, whatever you put in your profile must always be backed up with your social media identity through your posts and photos.
[Next, read: Social media sites to use to snag yourself a date]
People have a way of knowing stuff about you—and if your social media persona is not genuine, they will find out when they meet you in real life. So, be careful when learning how to describe yourself online.