A kiss can change your life forever. So if you want a life-changing, earth-shattering, mind-blowing kiss, use these 12 tips on how to be a good kisser.
Kissing is a huge part of a romantic relationship. It’s one way to express endearment, intimacy, and passion. It also allows you to connect with your partner without necessarily having to have sex with them. For a budding relationship, a kiss can be a clear indicator as to whether or not you have a physical connection with someone.
How to be a good kisser
Pucker up and take a look at these 12 tips on how to be a good kisser!
#1 Keep calm and balm. First of all, it doesn’t matter if you can make girls faint in pleasure or if you can wake up Sleeping Beauty with your kiss. If your lips are dry and cracked, it will make your partner feel like they’re kissing sandpaper. Or a reptile. So no, thank you. The number-one rule of kissing is to keep your lips irresistibly soft and smooth. Use a lip balm to tackle chapped, dry lips, but make sure that it doesn’t feel sticky and gross. [Read: 15 secrets to make your first kiss really memorable]
#2 Stay fresh. Another cardinal rule of kissing is good oral hygiene. No one wants to kiss a trashcan or an ashtray. Smelly, stinky breath is a major turn-off and even a big relationship deal breaker. So before you go in for a kiss *heck, before you even get near someone you want to seduce,* make sure you have clean, fresh breath and that you don’t have bits and pieces of food in your mouth.
And be sure to pop a mint in your mouth before you lean in for that kiss. You can also try to avoid eating anything that would make your breath smell funky on a date to make sure you get that end-of-the-night smooch *and maybe even more.*
#3 Pre-game. Mood and timing are also important things to consider if you want to plant a memorable and pleasurable kiss on your partner’s lips. So get your pre-game on by setting the mood first. Be pleasant and attentive while maintaining eye contact as you talk.
Flirt a little and turn your partner on with subtle gestures and innuendos. You can lean in closer and touch your partner or hold their hand. Look at their eyes, lower your voice, or just stop talking and close the distance with a gentle smooch. If they don’t pull back, hold the moment and give them your most passionate kiss. [Read: 6 giveaway signs she’s ready for you to kiss her]
#4 It should be real. Of course, you cannot kiss someone if they don’t want to. And on your end, you should want it, too. If you’re going to kiss someone just for the sake of kissing, your partner will be able to feel that. If either party feels any awkwardness, or if you don’t like what you’re doing, then please step away. It’s better not to kiss at all than to kiss and have your partner know that you don’t mean it. You will not only embarrass yourself but your partner as well.
#5 Smooth moves. All good kissers are calm and confident that they know what they’re doing—even if they’re also a little jittery inside. How you carry yourself is always attractive and a major turn-on, and you can channel this to your kissing skills to impress your partner.
Even if it’s your first kiss, you can still channel confidence by practicing beforehand and by moving your lips smoothly. Trust us, when you are confident and really into it, your mouth and lips will have a mind of their own. Just feel the moment and don’t ruin it with your insecurities and fears. [Read: 15 kissing techniques for that heartbeat-skipping kiss]
#6 Slow cooking. When you kiss, you don’t go and stick your tongue into your partner as soon as your lips meet. That’s just gross and a little too forward for your partner’s comfort. Even if it’s passionate in your head, in your partner’s mind, it’ll be completely unromantic. So start kissing with the lips. You can pull back to gaze into your partner’s eyes first and build anticipation if you want.
Then lean back in, this time for a deeper kiss. Feel your partner’s lips against yours and if they open their mouth, that’s your cue to start with a little tongue, if you like. From here, you can build the intensity slowly but oh-so-surely. [Read: How to kiss a girl for the first time and not screw up]
#7 Less is more. If you don’t know what to do, it’s best to stick to the idea that “less is more.” You don’t have to create fireworks with your mouth or use your tongue like you’re twirling a cherry stem. Even if you know every kissing trick in the book, you don’t really have to try it all at once. You’ll just end up making your partner feel like you’re giving him or her some oral detailing.
#8 No hickeys, please. Kissing doesn’t have to feel like you’re vacuuming your partner’s mouth, so don’t go for the hickey. It’s not romantic and it’s far from pleasurable. Remember, pro kissers don’t give their partners hickeys, not even on those hidden body parts. First of all, it’s tacky, and second, you’re not teenagers anymore.
#9 No excessive nibbling and biting. You know when you’re nibbling on a straw or when you nibble on your pencil eraser while you’re thinking of the answers on your exams? Well, don’t do that to your partner’s lips. Nibbling on your partner’s lips or tongue conjures images of fish nibbling on flakes of food, and it’s absolutely unromantic. While it’s good to give your partner’s lower lip a gentle teasing tug, be sure not to bite. Good teeth action is fine when kissing, as long as you’re not acting like a vampire. [Read: 11 signs of a bad kisser and 15 foolproof remedies]
#10 Tongue in check. The tongue is a tricky thing when it comes to kissing. First of all, some like it, some don’t, and some like lots of it. To be a good kisser, you have to know what your partner wants by mimicking the way they kiss you. One good way to start is to first kiss without the tongue for a while. Once you get a rhythm going, introduce your tongue little by little, slowly arousing your partner. Just be sure not to jab your tongue in and out. And never lick your partner’s face. That’s just gross.
#11 Beyond the lips. You don’t have to be confined to the lips when you’re kissing. While you can add variety by using different angles, strokes, and pressures in your kiss. You can further turn up the heat of your make-out sesh by kissing them on other parts of their body, especially in the erogenous zones.
#12 Give it a hand. As a certified good kisser, you should be able to give your partner the total package. You don’t just please your partner with your lips—your hands should add to the whole experience, too. So you can hold your partner behind their head, put your palms on both sides of their face, softly stroke their hair, rest your hand on their chest, or squeeze them closer with your hands on their hips or lower back. If you want to take it to the next level, you can start teasing, stroking, and undressing.
Lips, just as kissers, come in different forms. People also have different preferences when it comes to how they kiss and how they like to be kissed. The tips above provide a great guide to be a good kisser. However, if you want to be a great kisser, you also have to be sensitive about what your partner likes in the moment, which is the most important of all.
If you’ve watched Hitch, starring Will Smith, then you already have a good idea of how to properly kiss someone. But that’s just the basics. The tips above provide a great guide to make you even more confident as you lock lips with someone.
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Tiffany Grace Reyes
Tiffany is a wordsmith who has played with words ever since her letter-to-the-editor was published nationally at the age of 9. Since then her writing has gone f...