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Love Lessons The Notebook Can Teach a Cynical Heart

If you haven’t seen The Notebook in a while, grab a copy and watch it now! It’s packed with love lessons that can melt even the most cynical heart! By Colleen Anne Javellana

Love lessons the notebook can teach a cynical heart

Warning: Though this is quite a popular movie, there’s still a possibility that some of our readers haven’t seen it. If you’re one of them, please note that there may be some spoilers ahead!

There is just something about Nicholas Sparks’ novels that make you want to believe in love all over again. There is just some magic in the author’s words that make the heartless believe in something as intangible as hope, and longings of the heart. True, there are just a few romantic flicks that can stand the test of time. But The Notebook has become one such classic. It has become one of those movies that just bring you to tears, no matter how many times you watch it.

The premise of the story is quite simple. It’s the story of two different people, coming from two different worlds, who lose and find each other in different intervals of their lives. It’s the story of how love can stand the test of time, and endure life’s many storms.

The main characters aren’t even people out of the ordinary. In fact, Noah has even admitted in the first few lines of the film that, “I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts, and I’ve led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I’ve loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough.”

The journey of a not-so-cynical heart

Now, I would consider myself to be an almost cynical person. When I say almost cynical, I don’t really fall for big romantic gestures, mainly because I find myself questioning the motives behind them. I find myself running away from love, and yet I am fascinated by it. I find myself to be drawn to love, its lyricism and its undeniable charms. Perhaps the harsh world hasn’t made me so cold yet. [Read: How to be more positive in your life]

Being in my late-twenties has taught me a thing or two about love and relationships. I find myself to be finding my place in the world, while trying to gain my independence and perhaps fall in love in the process. Being human, I have had my heart broken quite a few times in my struggle to understand love and its mysteries. Just when I thought that I’ve finally understood love and its mysteries, it has eluded me once again. I certainly am surprised that the film and its unabashed sentimentality have this undeniable effect on me.

I speak also for this generation’s cold-hearted men and women who have found themselves to be wayward souls in the path of romance. Many would rather go for something as shallow and unfulfilling as a casual relationship. Many find themselves to be commitment-phobes, unwilling to give a part of themselves, for the fear of eventually getting hurt.

Love lessons you can learn from The Notebook

Perhaps the world does not need a scientific explanation for everything. Maybe we don’t need to subject everything to theory. Perhaps the greatest lessons in love can be learned, or even unlearned, from a romantic movie.

#1 Love is worth taking the leap for. When Noah first met Allie, he knew she was out of his league. He was just a simple country boy, and she was a rich girl from the city. He knew winning her heart would mean taking a leap of faith to completely get out of his comfort zone. Yet he took that risk and won her heart.

Allie, on her part, knew that being with Noah was a gamble. It meant abandoning the lifestyle she had grown accustomed to. Loving a boy from the “lower class” meant embracing the unfamiliarity of life. In love, taking the leap is a two-way street. Yet the leap is all worthwhile, because you would have each other in the end. [Read: 10 adorable ways to say “I love you”]

#2 Fights are essential in a relationship. Noah and Allie are two people who won’t back down from a fight. When they argue, they both go into shouting mode and emotions are at times, full-blown. Yet, no matter how much they find themselves fighting, their love grows stronger.

There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. As a couple, you will have your share of fights. Remember that fights and arguments are there to test your strength as a couple. Real love will see you through every fight and every argument. [Read: 8 ways to avoid the awkward tension after an argument]

#3 Never give up on the one you love. This might sound like an overly cliché line, but this rings all the more true. Noah never gave up on his love for Allie, even when she left him to move to the city. He didn’t give up on her when she was engaged to another man. And he certainly didn’t give up on her when her memory was slipping away. Real love means weathering life’s storms together. In life, it all comes down to who is by your side. [Read: 16 bad love habits that can ruin any relationship]

#4 There will be dark times and happy times. Love is not always sunshine and butterflies. There will be days when there are problems that will bring the both of you to your knees. Noah and Allie certainly faced tough times in their relationship, Allie’s sickness being one thing. Yet, they both handled their troubles with quiet dignity. They both knew that seeing each other through the tough times was essential. And their love endured, even until death. [Read: 16 secrets to a perfectly happy relationship]

#5 Every moment, no matter how small, is precious. When they were young, Noah and Aliie had a summer of romance. They took advantage of the time they had, because they knew when summer ended, they probably would never see each other again. The moments we spend with the one we love are perhaps the most precious seconds we could have. When you’re in love, you’ll wish for every moment together to last a lifetime.

#6 Love is the most beautiful thing this life has to offer. Noah and Allie’s story will always be one of those idealistic romances, yet I cannot help but be captivated by their love. True, the journey might be scary and lead you to unfamiliar places. I’ve realized that it can break you, but at the same time, love can heal you. It just defies logic, and refuses to be defined.

Perhaps the reason why this almost cynical heart has not wholly given up on love is because of stories like these. I have been broken many times in the past, but I refuse to hold my hands up in surrender. Being someone who considers herself to be a blank slate, I am drawn to people, and I love listening to their stories. Their stories, I find, become my own story as I am fully drawn by the memories and the emotions. Noah and Allie might be the quintessential couple for this generation of broken hearts.

Watching the movie made me believe in love, not the kind that seems to be thrown away so haphazardly, but in real love, the kind of love that you can feel in your bones. It is the kind of love that is frighteningly beautiful. This is the love that I would fight for, even to my last breath.

[Read: 10 ways to love more and hurt less in love]

Perhaps cynics need to learn how to hope again. How does one find the broken pieces of one’s heart when it has been shattered so many times? Maybe the colorless world needs to learn a few lessons on love from The Notebook. Perhaps only then can the colorless world learn how to smile once again.

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Colleen Anne Javellana
I'm a quirky and passionate individual who believes in True Love. I live for deep conversations and a good novel to read. I am in love with Life, and I want to ...
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