Knowing the signs he wants to be exclusive isn’t easy. Guys are hard to read and if you try to make it official before he’s ready, it could go bad.
I know how hard it can be to start something new with someone and then wonder if they’re in it for the real thing. Because you are. You want to be with them but you’re just not sure they’re feeling the same way yet. That’s why being able to read the signs he wants to be exclusive will come in handy.
You won’t have to worry about jumping the gun when it comes to the topic of becoming “official.” We all know how awkward it can be to wrongly assume someone is at the same place emotionally as you are.
How to know when it’s been long enough to become exclusive
This is really the greatest question asked by people. How long do we have to wait before becoming a committed couple? And honestly? It’s really just up to you and your partner. There isn’t a solid timeframe. You don’t just wait a month and suddenly become official.
You move at the pace that works best for you. If you both know you want to be committed after only two dates, that’s great! If it takes you a few more months before you want to commit yourself to someone else, that’s okay too. Do what works for you but just keep the line of communication open so you both know. [Read: Determining your relationship made easy]
Signs he wants to be exclusive
If you’re curious as to whether or not the guy you’re seeing is ready to be your boyfriend, asking him is clearly not a good bet. Sure, you could but if he’s really not ready at all, it’ll be awkward and he might get skittish.
Therefore, making sure he’s showing the signs he wants to be exclusive, and that will help you know if a discussion should be had. Here’s how to know if he’s ready to commit to you.
#1 He initiates spending time together. This will be something any guy who likes you will do. They’ll be the ones to make the plans and initiate spending time with you. Basically, if he’s continuously making an effort to be in your life and to have you in his life, he wants to be committed to you. This is one of the more obvious signs he wants to be exclusive but make sure he’s showing other signs before assuming. [Read: 8 genuine signs he wants a real relationship with you]
#2 He wants you to meet his friends. A guy’s friends are very special to him. He won’t want to introduce you to his friends unless he was serious about you. So if he was holding off on introducing his friends to you for a few weeks and then decided to do it, it’s probably because he’s realized he wants to be with you long-term.
#3 PDA is a regular occurrence. Public displays of affection always prove just how much your partner cares about you. Sure, some people might not be all that into it but if your man is loving on you with anyone around to see, they’re proud.
And being proud also means he’s probably thinking about being exclusive with you. When he doesn’t care who sees, it’s clear he only has eyes for you. Pay attention the next time he’s being lovey-dovey in public. [Read: The etiquette of PDA you have to follow]
#4 He openly discusses his feelings for you. A guy who wants to be in a relationship with you is a guy who’ll tell you how he feels. You won’t really have to sit and wonder about whether he wants to be with you. He’ll make it clear.
If he’s telling you how much he adores you and is happy with you, you can bet he wants you and only you.
#5 You basically already feel exclusive. If you’re going about yourselves and it already feels like you’re in a relationship, he probably feels it too. And that means he’s happy with being exclusive. If he’s doing all the things a committed boyfriend would be doing, he might already be committed to you without you two talking about it.
#6 He checks with you before making big plans. This is probably one of the biggest signs he wants to be exclusive. When he’s checking in with you before taking weekend-long trips and making sure you’re cool with it, he’s committed already. Otherwise, he wouldn’t owe it to you. Guys who are randomly leaving for the weekend without informing you don’t want exclusivity. [Read: 14 undeniable signs he wants to spend his life with you]
#7 He makes plans for in the future with you. The best way to tell if a guy’s ready to commit is by the way he talks about future plans. Does he invite you to family weddings a couple months down the road? When a guy is making plans with you in the future, he wants you to actually be there in the future. He’s basically telling you he’s committed.
#8 He talks about wanting to get serious with someone. A guy who opens up about wanting to settle down or have a serious relationship is trying to tell you something. Perhaps he might not be ready that very moment, but he’s getting close. He’s opening up to you and making sure you know that he wants to be exclusive in the near future, if not already.
#9 He talks about his plans for the future. Now, you might think this is a common thing for guys to do but pay attention to how he’s saying it. Is he talking about wanting a family or settling down with someone? If those plans are in his future, he’s thinking about being in a real relationship with you.
#10 He asks for your opinion and advice. This is just something any guy who likes you should do but it’ll become more apparent the more he’s thinking about becoming exclusive. He’ll ask what you think about certain things in his life. He might even ask your advice on difficult things he’s dealing with.
#11 He’s open and honest. This one you might just have to judge for yourself. Is he being honest? Does he tell you things even though they might not be all that great? If so, he’s probably ready to be exclusive with you and commit.
#12 He discusses deeper topics with you. He won’t just keep conversation at surface level. He’ll dig a little deeper to really get to know you on a much better level. He’ll talk about stuff that speaks to your core values and morals. This is his way of making sure the two of you are compatible in this sense. And that means he’s probably ready to be exclusive.
Being aware of the signs he wants to be exclusive will help you understand when you can bring up the topic of becoming committed to each other. This can save you a lot of alarm if you try to DTR too early.
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...