Unfortunately, there are some crappy people out there. They’ll waste your time to get what they want. Here’s how to tell if a guy is playing you.
Your time is valuable. More importantly, your love is valuable. People know this and yet, some of them still waste your time and toy with your feelings. They’re not good people but there’s no escaping that reality. Instead, you’ll just have to learn how to tell if a guy is playing you so you can avoid wasting all your time.
You hear stories about guys manipulating girls into being with them when they don’t even treat them fairly. They basically just want one thing. If you know how to tell if a guy is playing you or not, you can avoid being just another notch on their belt.
Why guys play girls from time to time
I wish I could say they don’t mean to but most of the time, guys know just what they’re doing. They know exactly what to say and what to do in order to get a girl in bed but they have no plans to make her their girlfriend.
Instead, they just do whatever they can to get exactly what they want and nothing more. The girl then falls for them and, since she cares so much about him, she does everything he wants. Guys play girls because they’re selfish. [Read: 10 signs he’s not playing hard to get he’s just playing you]
How to tell if a guy is playing you so you can stop wasting your time
When you notice the signs of a guy playing you, you can jump ship before stuff gets too serious. And truthfully, those signs are probably a lot easier to see than you realize. Here’s what to look for so you can tell when a guy is totally playing you.
#1 He compliments you all the time. It may seem like compliments come from a place of love but they often come from a place of wanting to make you feel good about yourself. And when you’re feeling really confident, it’s hard to see the real issues at play.
Basically, if a guy is showering you with compliments, he might be playing you. It’s okay for him to make you feel good, but when the compliments are a tad bit excessive, he could be trying to distract you from something. [Read: 10 compliments for women that backfire]
#2 He only calls or texts late. AKA, you’re a booty call. This is a really big sign a guy is playing you because if he’s only texting you late at night, how much could he really care about you? He’d be talking to you throughout the day often if he really liked you because he’d want to know how your day went.
#3 You don’t go out in public for dates. This is an especially big sign if the reason for it is that date nights at home are “more romantic.” He’s totally trying to play you by saying this. In reality, he doesn’t want to take you out in public because he doesn’t want to risk you two running into any other girls he’s seeing. He’s just covering his own ass.
#4 You never meet his friends. If you’re romantically involved with someone and the feelings are real, you meet each other’s friends. You get involved in one another’s lives. And if the guy you’re seeing isn’t doing that, he’s playing you.
Never meeting his friends just shows you that his friends might not even know about you. If he’s not telling his friends about you, does he truly have feelings for you? Probably not. Which means he’s just using you for something else entirely. [Read: How to accept their friends and get them to accept you]
#5 He doesn’t talk much about himself. How much do you know about the guy? If you don’t know anything more than the food he likes and his favorite color, he could be playing you. By not giving you too many personal details, he’s not forming a bond with you and the only reason to do that is if he plans to cut you loose soon.
#6 He’s vague about his whereabouts. Couples usually communicate where they’ve been or what they’ve done throughout the day. If you wonder what your man has been doing and he’s super vague about it, he could be playing you. He’s probably been somewhere you wouldn’t like and doesn’t want to tell you about it. [Read: 10 reasons a guy could be ignoring you]
#7 He shields his phone from you. He has other people he’s seeing if he’s always hiding the phone from you. None of the conversations with his friends should ever be so private that he needs to stop you from seeing them all together. He hides his phone because he has something to hide and that’s the fact that he’s playing you.
#8 You only spend time together when it’s convenient for him. Basically, you only get together when he’s free and he expects you to change your plans to accommodate that. He does this because he doesn’t have much time between all the people he’s seeing. This is also true because he doesn’t want to plan things too far in advance because he doesn’t know when he’s going to drop you. [Read: 20 big warning signs of a bad boyfriend]
#9 He doesn’t add you on social media. This is one of the biggest signs that a guy is playing you. If you’ve been dating someone for a decent amount of time, you should be friends on social media. You two are involved, it only makes sense.
If he’s actively not adding you at all, it’s because he posts pictures that he doesn’t want you to see. That and he might not want other girls he is friends with to see.
#10 He makes vague excuses for his absences. Does he go missing for hours at a time and doesn’t text or anything? If so, he’s probably playing you and one way to know for sure is how he responds to your question about his absence. If he just waves his hand and says he was “busy,” he’s probably playing you. [Read: 6 big telltale excuses you can’t fall for]
#11 When you get mad, his response is only compliments. If you want to know how to tell if a guy is playing you, just see how he takes arguments. When you’re upset with him, does he try to understand where you’re coming from and fix it? Or does he just shower you with compliments? If it’s the latter, he’s playing you and trying to make you forget why you’re even mad.
#12 He calls you “crazy” for making assumptions. On the flip side, if he starts calling you crazy for being upset or making assumptions that he’s playing you, then he definitely is. Basically, this is a tactic he uses to manipulate you. If you think you’re being unreasonable, you’ll drop the issue.
If you want to know how to tell if a guy is playing you, all you really need to do is take a step back and view his behavior from afar. Does he seem to genuinely care about you? If not, he’s totally playing you.
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...