If you’re one of those girls where he only wants sex and nothing more, you probably want to know why. This is why guys only want to hop in your bed.
I get how frustrating it can be. You’re a fun, easygoing lady who just wants to find a guy who’ll commit to a relationship but for some reason, they only want to bone you. It’s annoying and it probably hurts. You just want to find love and he only wants sex.
There could be a lot of reasons for this. Sometimes it could just be that guys are pigs who only want sex but other times, you could be giving off the wrong vibes. Luckily, you can definitely fix this issue and find love.
Why guys can get away with casual sex and women can’t
This double standard is obviously super annoying. Guys can go out and get sex all the time without being called any bad names but when women do, they’re labeled as sluts and skanks. It’s not fair and it’s not right.
Why do guys get to have shameless casual sex when women can’t? Most of it has to do with the fact that women are supposed to be “reserved” in the bedroom. We’re not supposed to be oversexualized beings. Women are supposed to remain modest. Guys are allowed to do whatever they want sexually because they’re just that, guys. Society tells them it’s okay and it tells women it’s not. [Read: How to make him want more than a one night stand]
Why he only wants sex with you and never a relationship
If you’re someone who seems to get guys easily but just can’t get them to stick around for more than sex, you could be giving off the wrong vibes. Here are the possible reasons he only wants sex and how you can fix them and find love.
#1 You have sex way too soon. Having sex right away when you start dating someone new sends a clear sign that you’re not looking to settle down. Usually, you want to get to know someone before hopping in bed with them.
If you met someone out at a bar and hooked up with them that night, they won’t really take you seriously as a potential girlfriend. Slow things down the next time you meet a guy you actually like. Get to know each other on a deeper level first. [Read: How to take it slow in a relationship]
#2 You joke and talk about sex all the time. Now, I’ll be the first to say that what you joke about should never be taken seriously but guys always will if it’s about sex. Making sex jokes all the time shows a guy that you have a dirty mind.
Obviously, he’ll think you’re a sex-crazed woman who only wants to hook up. You need to get to know someone a lot better before you show them that side of your personality. Show them you can be the girlfriend-type and joke about sex.
#3 You never set your standards. Meaning, guys don’t know what you really want. If all you two do is hook up, they’ll assume that’s it. They can’t read your mind and when you make it seem like you don’t want a relationship, they’ll take that seriously.
#4 You respond to their 2 am hook up texts. AKA, you accept being their booty call. If you want a relationship with a guy, you need to show them that a 2 am hookup isn’t on your list of things you enjoy. The more they get those hookups, the more they’ll think you want them just as much as they do.
#5 You keep going after the wrong guys. Basically, you like the guys who don’t want to commit. They may like you and having sex with you, but they also like hooking up with other people.
And that means they won’t be the ones to want to settle down. If you keep going after guys who don’t want anything more than sex, you’ll never get anything more than that. [Read: How to stop falling for the wrong men]
#6 You don’t seem like a commitment girl. This is a huge double standard but it’s the way guys are. If you want to land yourself a boyfriend, you’ll just have to adjust your behavior slightly so you don’t seem like a hookup girl.
You need to act like a commitment girl. Meaning, doing things that are very girlfriend-like and less like the girl he only wants sex from.
#7 You talk harshly about relationships. Bashing on relationships all the time will not make a guy want to date you. If all you do is talk about how crappy relationships are, why would he think you want to be in one?
You need to stop doing this. A lot of women do this because it makes them sound cool but really, it’s only driving away great guys you like. You can talk about wanting a relationship but talk about wanting a relationship with the right guy. [Read: 16 signs you’re not ready for a real relationship]
#8 The only time you spend together is in the bedroom. Why would he want more than sex if all you ever want to do is hook up with him? You need to spend quality time outside of the bedroom with a guy so he can see how great you really are.
#9 You always initiate sex with them. Obviously, if you like someone and find them attractive, you’ll definitely be all over them. And regularly having sex will definitely make you want to initiate it more. However, that’s not always a good thing.
You always trying to have sex with them will make them think that’s all you want, too. Maybe they really wanted to sit and watch a movie with you. By going for sex when you could be getting to know them, you’re sending a very clear message about what you want. [Read: How to initiate sex and turn your lover on]
#10 You haven’t told him you want more. Women need to learn that guys can’t read our minds. Hell, they can hardly even read signals that you want more than just sex. You need to be open and honest and tell him you want more.
To do this, just tell him that sex with him is great but it’s really just a bonus to his great personality and you’d like to have more with him. Most of the time, he’ll be surprised by this in addition to being flattered.
The biggest reason he only wants sex is probably because you keep giving off those signs. When a guy thinks all you want is sex, why would they try for more? Make your wants and needs clear so you find the right guy.
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Bella is a lifestyle writer, cheese enthusiast (Wisconsin native over here) and fantasy adventure author-in-progress who enjoys all things love, dog, p...