Nobody bats an eye when men date multiple women, and ladies, you can do the same. Casting a wider net makes it easier to find Mr. Right!
You know how when you meet a guy you like, you always seem to meet another one at the same time? When it rains it pours, right? Well, breaking news, ladies! It’s okay for you to see both of them at once! Stop worrying about how society judges you. It’s an unfair double standard. Get out there and go for it!
It’s not for everyone, some people are just hardwired for pure monogamy. But try it and you might be surprised. There are so many potential benefits to dating multiple guys at a time. And if you do it right, there’s very little downside. If you’re respectful of the guys, then no feelings will get hurt. And don’t worry about what your friends and family will think. Just tell those that you think will support you. Those who won’t, well, they don’t need to know, do they? [Read: 9 reasons your ideal man wish list isn’t working for you]
Why it’s better to date more than just one guy at a time
You may think that dating multiple guys makes you a cheater, but you’re not even official yet! Why waste time dating just one guy, when you can sift through an entire bunch and pick the one that’s right for you?
#1 Honesty… But not too much. Dating two or more guys doesn’t mean you should stop caring about their feelings. It’s not okay to lie or make someone believe that you’re exclusive with them when you’re not. As always, you’ve got to follow the golden rule of “do unto others as you’d have them do unto you.”
Nobody wants to be cheated on. You don’t necessarily have to tell a guy that you’re seeing someone else, at least not initially. If you’re just screwing, then all is fair, but if he’s taking you on dates, and treating you more like a girlfriend, it’s time to ‘fess up. Maybe he’ll accept it or maybe he won’t, but you owe it to a guy to tell him at that point.
#2 Fun and exciting. There’s definitely something thrilling about dating more than one guy at a time. It always feels good to be wanted, and you can double up on that feeling, when it’s coming from two men. And since you’ve been hearing for your whole life that it’s wrong wrong wrong for women to sleep around, there’s the added excitement of breaking that taboo.
It’s also just fun. Life is short, and you always regret what you don’t do more than the things you try. Live in the moment and be the advocate for your own pleasure. Stop caring about what other people think. If you know someone will judge you for dating multiple guys, then it’s none of their business, and they don’t have to know. It’s your life, so enjoy it. [Read: 33 best places to meet eligible men]
#3 Practice makes perfect. Sex gets better and better the more of it you have. This is true both in terms of knowing what you need for your own pleasure, and what it takes to drive a guy wild. Even if your ultimate plan is to settle down with your dream man in the future, he’ll be easier to find and keep if you’re giving him great sex.
People have got to get it out of their heads that an experienced woman is a slut, or any other negative word you can think of. Everyone should strive to be a better lover, and the only way to get better at anything is to practice at it. Athletes get better by training with a variety of teammates and opponents, with different skill levels and playing styles. Why should sex be any different?
#4 Hard to get. There’s just something really hot about a woman that a lot of guys are after. You might be worried that people who see you with separate guys will think badly of you. Here’s how it really works when men know you are seeing a couple of guys: the losers who never had a chance in the first place call you a slut. The real men want to know why they’re being left out.
It seems paradoxical. Why should dating around make you seem harder to get, not easier. But that’s how it works. Dating multiple men will make you an object of desire. Remember, the guys who call you a slut are going home every night to a large porn collection, not a woman.
#5 Confidence boost. When you’re feeling confident, you get way more attention from the opposite sex. Confidence really is one of the most attractive qualities, and the best way to have the feeling of confidence is to feel wanted. When you know there are two or even more guys just waiting for your call, you know you’re hot. People around you will notice too.
It’s often said that people who have just had sex have a glow around them. It’s quite common for both men and women to be hit on a lot during the few hours after sex. Most of this is the confidence boost that sex gives. When you date more than one guy, you’ll have a perpetual glow about you. You’ll walk with your head high and a confident smile, and you’ll notice a surge in the amount of attention you get.
#6 Best of all worlds. Most women are aroused by a lot of different types of sex. One night she might want slow, passionate sex with lots of eye contact and kissing. The next, she might want hair pulling, and dirty talk. And it doesn’t stop there: there’s dominating him, he dominating her, dress up, role play, toys, long oral sex sessions for him and for her, fast hard pounding, slow deep thrusting, the list is really endless.
Of course, not all women are into each and every one of these, but most probably are turned on by at least a few of them. Unfortunately, finding a guy who can wear that many hats is one in a million. The obvious solution is dating more than one guy. When you can have one guy you call when you want that hot, freaky sex, or who has a magic tongue that never gets tired, that’s great. It’s even better when the next day you can go for dinner and a movie, and a night of passionate lovemaking with another guy. [Read: 9 tips for having a casual relationship]
#7 Cast a wide net. Even if you’re looking to meet the right guy, the man you’re going to marry, you should still date more than one guy at a time. You can never tell right away if a man is the right one. It takes time. But spending months figuring it out, only to be disappointed, will feel like wasted time, unless you have another prospect.
Just think about it statistically. Your odds of meeting Mr. Right will double when you double your potential pool. Date three guys and you triple your odds! There are plenty of fish in the sea, but you only catch the ones you fish for.
Dating more than one guy at a time keeps your options open. Your confidence level will be through the roof, and your sex life will come alive like it never has before. For many women, the only question is, why wouldn’t you want to try it?
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I'm a freelance writer dividing my time between the beaches of Thailand and my hometown of Chicago....