Do you ever wish your boyfriend would just learn to treat you like a lady, without you having to tell him to do things all the time? Try these simple steps to change your playboy into a chivalrous knight.
Do you ever wish your man would just start treating you the way you want to be treated?
Men seem to have evolved physically from the apes, but at times, their chivalry and manners seem to go back to the days of the primitive apes.
Here are a few tips that you could use while you’re with your man to make him learn a few manners himself. [Read: Is he the one for you?]
Getting him to open the car door
The next time the both of you go out and he parks the car and is about to step out, place your handbag on your lap and start to go through it as you continue to sit in the car.
Pull out your lip gloss or check your face. Do something and pretend to be completely engrossed checking your face.
He’ll probably get tired of waiting for you to come out, and he’ll just walk over to your side, and open your door for you. [Read: How to play hard to get]
This is when you flash your cutest smile and say “awww… that is sooo sweet of you” or “it’s just so sweet of you to do that. Thank you…” he’ll get the hint, and do this more often, at least wherever possible. If he still doesn’t get it, you still have your handbag to do it all over again. [Read: How to talk to a guy and make him like you more]
Getting him to open doors at restaurants
After a good meal at a restaurant, as you walk towards the door, take his arm in yours and hold hands as you lean towards him. As you get near the door, slow your pace just a little bit and allow him to get to the door first.
It’s obvious he’ll push the door open. This is when you fasten up just a bit and walk through the door first, even if it doesn’t come naturally to him to allow you to walk through first. When you step out, catch a glance at him and just smile, and look away but hold that smile on your face. He’ll be very curious to know why you’re smiling. And when you tell him how sweet he was to open the door for you, that moment will be something he’s going to remember for eternity.
[Read: Where to find a nice guy?]
Buying you flowers
It’s not too hard to let your guy know that you love flowers. He probably knows that already, but he might just have forgotten that special gesture of getting you flowers over the months or years. [Read: How to better a relationship]
The next time you walk past a florist, take time to smell the flowers. Stop by the flowers and tell him how beautiful it looks. He’ll definitely pick them up for you. You could brush his cheek with your hands or give him a kiss, and let him know how nice and special you feel. Don’t be surprised when your guy knocks on your door the next week with a beautiful posse of flowers!
[Read: How to manipulate men]
Hope these tips can help you turn your slob of a boyfriend into the chivalrous man you’ve always wanted. And if there’s anything else you want to change about him, just improvise on these tips.
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I think we place far too much emphasis on ‘making’ men treat women like ladies; for the most part and to varying degrees they do. What is TOTALLY lacking in our culture is women who treat men like men and act like ladies. Note how many ads say something to the effect of ‘I want a man who acts like a man and treats a lady like a lady without being told’ yet an ad from a man saying ‘I want a lady who acts like a lady and knows how to treat man like a man without being told’ would be the subject on Oprah Winfrey men are pigs special.
I get blank stares when I ask women who can rattle off all the things most of us men have learned to do (open doors, hold seats, drop off, pick up, provide, protect etc) what it is women do. The funniest answer was ‘uh well I guess just treat him with basic human respect’. Er no. A lady isn’t a human being with breasts, she acts like one, treats men like men, and gets treated like a lady in return and vice-versa. We don’t need more articles like this about how clueless and piggy men are; we need more articles on how you will NATURALLY be treated like a lady in the ways this artcile suggests and more if you just start ACTING like a lady and treating a man like one. Here is a clue; men invariably pick up the check and women *expect* men do. We do so as a *gesture* to you as a lady, in effect officially recognizing you as one and further as one we’d possibly want to and can provide for and protect. That is a huge gesture that deserves at the very least a real and genuine show of appreciation which simplye means actually appreicating it for what it is and sayign thank you in such a way that makes the man feel good. That is all it really takes. Yet most of the time (wuth American women at least) you get a thank you that your credit-card company gives you. ‘Thanks for taking care of your debt, now we are even’. Generallly the rational is that you spent a lot to look good. I couldn’t care less what YOU spent so I would ask you out. I spent money on my clothes, gym, hair, not to mention car and career so YOU would say YES. I don’t OWE you anything for going out with me. I a) asked you out and b) treated you do dinner. Both of those acknowledgements require acknowledgments and behaviour on your part. But if won’t ever happen because you’ll all read stupid articles like ths an think on top of the dinner you are owed you are owed flowers and doors and protection and money and fealty. Earn it. Learn to act like a lady and treat a man like a man and no one will ever have to write an article like this for you again.
Thanks for the response Michael. I enjoyed reading it. I agree that women don’t think much about how to be a lady. But how do women treat men like men? Men say they ate simple but I don’t think so. Women are meant to be persued, and men treated like men. So men know how to persue a woman. But how do woman treat men like “men”? Might sound like a dumb question. But women are so different from men I often find what a woman might find to be normal ends up being disrespectful towards a man. I am very forward and blunt, very confrontational, and Im honest when something bothers me. And it comes across as being controlling and bitchy. I’m no longer persued in my five year relationship. Or not in the way of romance. I want to wait for marriage. Because I want to be respected and make good decisions. But since there is no “reward”, my boyfriend stopped doing nice things for me. He still opens doors, but I haven’t gotten flowers or those small romantic things anymore. this has pretty much been a ramble, I know. Seeking to be persued, and feeling rejected. Trying to be a lady, but failing I suppose.
Fine,then you,acting like a lady will:do my laundry,make me dinner,NOT get a job(distraction from cleaning)and will be submissive to me at ALL times—if you don’t do that then i will not do anything for you-I am not a sexist,i don’t believe at all it is a womans job to do that just cause she is a woman,i am saying that you can’t have it both ways-either equality everywhere or nowhere-MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND!
Sarah, do you do any thing for your bf, have you ever set up a date for you to,have you ever told him how much you appreciate him,you aid “I’m no longer persued in my five year relationship. Or not in the way of romance” but do you do any thing romantic for him,men have feelings to and it seem he is fed up of doing,doing,doing only for you to say thank you.Treat other the way you want to be treated and stop thinking about your-self.
To be honest, after reading this article and the responses to it, I think everyone is placing a little too much emphasis on gender. Granted this article is all about gender, think about it like this- men are supposed to hold the door open for women. If they don’t, what are they? Pigs? Do you claim that chivalry is dead and declare a personal vendetta on all men?
So what about women? We’re not supposed to open doors, or hold out chairs, or go out of our way to be courteous to the opposite gender. Why is this?
I’m not old-fashioned I suppose, but I’d consider this kind of cultural view as a double-standard and don’t get me wrong, double-standards based on cultures are all over the world.
“MAKE YOUR MAN TREAT YOU LIKE A LADY”
Can I point out the things I saw wrong with this statement?
Why would you try to change your significant other into someone they are not to make yourself feel more respected/ loved/ adored, whatever the case may be?
If he’s not naturally courteous then you’re better off NOT trying to change him into someone that is. This ruins relationships, and all because you’re trying to selfishly ‘teach’ him to bend backwards for you and make you feel special.
On a sidenote, I feel like I should mention that it SHOULD be okay to tell him if you’re not feeling very special to him or that you feel disrespected or not like a true woman in his eyes. This is fine, but using underhanded trickery to get him to act the way you want him to is just horrid.
If you’re approaching the door and someone is about to enter/ exit as well, HOLD IT OPEN. It’s the nice thing to do. Don’t just wait for someone else to get it for you and use the guise of “I’m a woman, so it’s not my job”.
**Do YOU hold the car door open for HIM ever? No? Then what makes you think you deserve him doing it for you?
As far as the flower thing goes, I’d say don’t base how loved you feel on an object, or even the gesture of giving that object. He probably does other things for you, like gives you backrubs or buys you a mountain dew and surprises you with it, maybe he was having a really bad day but decided to forget about his feelings to comfort you after a long day of work. It doesn’t have to be plants, or even tangible! It’s a gesture regardless, which is worth at least as much as that expensive bouquet you want him to get you.
I feel like we don’t do a whole lot sometimes but expect the world from our man simply because we have tits. Don’t you think that’s a little unfair? On the whole it’s like reverse sexism… “Do this for me and I’ll just treat you decently and sleep with you” and you get mad when a man tells you to get back in the f*cking kitchen.