Does your man constantly stare at other woman no matter how many times you’ve told him it makes you feel uncomfortable? Then it’s time to open your bag of sneaky tactics. And trust us, this will stop your man from staring at other women when you’re around!
Click here to read the introduction: Does you Man always Stare at Other Women?
Tell him that his constant drooling appreciation of the opposite gender in front of you bothers you. Why? Explain that it makes you feel uncomfortable. Ask him how he would react if you did the same and state that it makes you look like a fool in front of others. If he cares for you, he will understand and try to control his ogling eyes at least by some extent.
Don’t accept any corny excuses
If your man comes up with the most likely response, that he has to check out other women to reestablish that you’re the best for him, don’t accept it. If he really loves you, he doesn’t need to constantly reaffirm it, and definitely not by leching at other women. Laugh it off and demand a smarter explanation or mention that his behavior is unacceptable. And if his excuse is that he can’t help it, point out that he’s a grown-up who should be in control of his behavior. And if he’s that much of a slave to his ogling habits, you might want to consider whether you want to be with such a man.
The pot calling the kettle black
If, after you’ve talked to him about it, he continues to size up other women in front of you, it’s probably time to give him a taste of his own medicine. Next time you’re out together and he starts giving his eyes some exercise, crack your knuckles and prepare yourself for a staring game, female style. Stare at other men, smile more often at others, do that thing with your hair as you stare at another man, giggle at that cutie in the next table and look away, and just about do anything that would attract other men’s attention.
When he asks you about it, which he definitely would if he even remotely cares about you, let your eyes drift away to the next table again, before smiling at him lovingly as if he’s just come back into focus. A vague, “Sorry hun, did you say something?”, should get him making himself look like an idiot, at which stage you can laugh it off and say you’re only joking, or that it doesn’t mean anything, or that he’s the one you really want.
He may get what you’re trying to prove here, unless he’s a dense troll. But in either case, a few dates of the staring game should help him learn a good lesson about stares and the power women wield when it comes to the staring game!
And while you’re indulging in the staring game, make sure you have your share of fun. After all, if you man doesn’t get the hint, you’d at least have a new arm candy who’s staring back at you right now!
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I have a situation I’d like help with please, as I am unsure who else to ask. I’ve been dating a man, I wouldn’t mind him ogling women, though he takes it further. While driving he goes over the line, because of staring at women in cars driving by.
He watches women consistently, it doesn’t matter whether there 70 or 12, as long as they have a bottom or breasts, he will stare at them. He walks around rearranging himself, several times a day, or he will keep his hands in his shorts or pants for short periods.
To me it is rude and disrespectful, as there is no reason to do this when I am with him, as he is gone several days during the week, when he knows I’m watching him he will refrain for a short period then continue.
I asked him once how long he had a crush on his friends wife, ( as he will stare down her shirt every chance he gets and anything else he’s able to stare at) he became angry and said I’ve known her for 14 years, and I’ve seen her in her underwear. Meanwhile I asked the women and her husband he was speaking about, and she replied he’s never seem me in my underwear, and who does he think he is, saying something like that ? Other then his endless obsession with females, he doesn’t seem like a horrible man, but it does greatly concern me, as he never takes a break from it. Is there a way to help him, or is it a hopeless cause trying to change his disgusting habits ?
Thanks for any advice you can offer.
I don’t think men like this can or will change. They cannot control their behavior. He would have to work on self-control. Some men are unable to do so. Go to counseling with him on this issue and repost. Even if just for one session. I am curious to see how relationship counselor would handle this. Perhaps a different man is in order…. New boyfriend? Good luck.
My new boyriend says he was my secret admirer for a long time, and now we’re together. i see him looking at young women in those decorated on the backside jeans, almost every time we go to stores together. He says he’s not doing anything, but he did say a former girlfriend asked him what he’s looking at, and seemed upset about it. This is really bothering me. I’m not young, but still attractive.
My friend’s long time boyfriend stares at other girls all the time. She even walks in front so she won’t see others. He will even hide sometimes so the girl won’t see him stare. He makes girls or women, feel uneasy sometimes so they cover up with a top. She talks to him and it always ends up in a fight. Nothing she says to him helps. What should she do?
Well, I talked with my boyfriend and he got upset at me. I asked him if he looked at girls more when he was drinking, and he said yes. After that, he stopped drinking. The girl-watching became less. He still does it, but stops himself before it gets bad.
I did try some of the suggestions here, such as looking at other men. He admitted it made him uncomfortable, and he seems sort of lost when I do it.
Last night, he looked at a young lady, who seemed to be with her parents, and followed her with his eyes. We were on our date night, which he started in the first place. When he saw me, he stopped. I couldn’t sleep all night, thinking of his eyes following her, not once but twice.
From a male perspective, I will say that I married “up” with my wife, she is certainly better looking than I am. I am a very successful businessman and she has access to the good life via our relationship.
I used to date a woman I almost married who was a GREAT person, however, not too attractive. My eyes constantly wandered.
With my current wife, she haas 100% of my attention, I enjoy noticing other men (probably your poor husbands and boyfriends) checking out my wife.
The key, I think, is making sure as a woman, you are better looking than your husband. The reverse situation will cause the man to keep shopping, even when he is attached.
Just my two cents!
Hi Julie I want you to know I know exactly how you feel! The thought of my husbands eyes on other women is enough to drive a woman mad. Every time he stares at women it’s the most awful feeling. He’s not even graceful about it! When I confront him he says he hasn’t done anything wrong. He gets upset. I’ve stared at men and he doesn’t notice or seem to care. We’ve been together for a long time. I’m not young but still attractive. He is too. I see girls look at him all the time. I want him to go to counseling with me but he says its my problem and wont go. What do I do? I would appreciate male responses as well. Thanks
Staring at other men or flirtatious behavior to teach your man a lesson only helps if you yourself are a young, hot cutie. Also, you may get a response you didn’t want. That happened to me. I stared at a hot guy and he came over and started flirting with me, meanwhile, my boyfriend was not paying any attention. Classic! So I don’t think “giving him a taste of his own medicine” helps. What helped me was to get pretty damn upset and leave the premises. I cried, told him it was disrespectful and that anytime it happened again I would leave and I didn’t give a damn where we were. He has not ogled a woman in my presence since. If he even looks like he’s about to I get distant and chilly.
The male who commented, oh my goodness. What you said is depressing, but maybe it is true. We ladies just aren’t good looking enough. I imagine it would be true that if we were all super foxes and men were constantly staring and hitting on us our men would be too preoccupied guarding against the competition to look at other women. But my man was just looking at women, period. Particularly blondes. But any woman. If he couldn’t see her face if she appeared young from behind he had to see her face. We can’t all be beauty queens, and most women don’t want an ugly man.
@getmaddonttakeit, Stop what you’re doing!
No offense to you. But you do realize you’re coming across as a very insecure woman to your boyfriend, don’t you?
If you stop your guy from staring at women the way you do, you’re stopping him from doing what he likes by preventing him in a very aggressive manner. You’re only going to make him want to stare at women even more than before! Probably when you aren’t around.
Show off your confidence instead. Let him see for himself that you’re a much more attractive woman because you’re confident and believe in yourself. And you say your boyfriend didn’t care when another guy came up to you and started flirting with you. That’s not right, is it? He probably doesn’t feel like he’ll ever lose you because you come across as very insecure to him. Just trying to help you.
women need to know something.
when a guy doesnt know you, you are just an object. once you are in a relationship with him you become a person and he no longer sees you as an object. you elevate to a wife which is like a mother daughter, sister. you are now family.
your man is not thinking about trading his family for an object he sees passing by. a man will go out with a hot woman and once he knows her and the fantasy becomes a reality he changes gears. if he doesnt like the womans personality, it doesnt even matter if she was hot, because she is known to him and loses the fantasy object appeal.
men who stare at women for long periods are simple enticed by the tools of attraction. most women dont even know that the clothing they think is conservative really is not conservative.
you may be covered from head to toe but if the dress attire is form fitting, where the shape of thighs,bottom or breasts are visible, you will be subject for male attention.
second, wearing make up, is a scientific aspect wear you are making your face appear to be flawless. the coloration and foundation makes a man stare because the girl appears to be something she is not. most guys cant even tell when a woman is wearing make up. putting makeup on is what will most likely catch a mans attention, other than showing skin. its a deception.
high heels are associated with sex and stillethos, so that also makes an issue. really if women wore clothing as conservative as most men do, they would find less of this eye popping burden.
as far as getting your man to stop…..well first you need to understand the three ways a man mainly looks at a woman.
first there is the look of appraisal
second there is the look of lust
and third there is the look of flirtation
other than that, guys will give various reasons and excuses but it ultimately comes down to those three.
if your man is giving looks of flirtation, than that is not a sign of danger, but rather DOOM. that is a guy trying to engage in eye contact with the subject. if he is doing this it most likely would go futher if the opportunity presented itself.
if your man is looking because of lust….well believe it or not this can be fixed. looking with lust is when a man attenpts to imagine gropping or dreaming about penatrating the subject. some guys will stare regardless if discovered because it is the only consolation they will have knowing full well nothing more will come from this encounter. this is a progressive type of look which is an addiction. it can be stopped by stopping porn, watching rated r movies, magazines, masturabtion with mental thoughts of glamour women. basicly stop feeding the demand until it dies. it does take effort but eventually will die down. personally if you get Christ in you he will stop desiring the lust altogether. once again the man has got to want to. also he may not know it but its more peaceful for him to discontinue because he will stop feeling the need to scan for victims of prey lol
lastly you have the look of apprasial which has no sexual attachment to it, but is a result of seeing someone who simply looks very attractive. if your man finds himself staring best to have him wear sun glasses. this type of look, is not a betrayal but simply what happens when you see a costumed person walking down the street. men wear clothes but women wear costumes. face paint, high heels, 100 dollar salon hair cuts, painted nails….its a costume. so imagine walking down town on halloween and not looking……yeah good luck. should it bother you? not this kind, because even if you are more attractive, the variation of beauty is appealing and attention worthy. like I said before there is no sexual attachment to the look and could be done to any gender. women just happen to bait more attention, than men. but if a supermodel man walked by and had face paint and good proportions you man would look too because it is not sinful, just natural to notice.
however if it because a problem because attention always seems elsewhere, try not going to places where people are not baiting for so much attention all the time, or in hours less busy. help you man out by not going through the gauntlet.
dont think your man doesnt love you, just try to fgure out what kind of look he does and adress it by understanding the circumstances that they occur.
If your guy ogles at women so much that it starts to bug you, just give him a dose of his own medicine. If that doesn’t stop him, tell him calmly it bothers you when he ogles since you think it’s rude. When he denies ogling(most guys do), better drop the topic because dragging on in order to make him admit will never work and only lead to heated arguments. If he’s a considerate gentleman, he’ll curb himself next time you hang out together. You could even jokingly say something like, “my friend’s embarrassed to hang out with her guy because he ogles at women too much. She’s worried other women will deem her guy as a boor.” That should remarkably reduce his habit because he’d surely want you to be proud of him.
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In any case, it’s kinda normal for guys to check women out. Most guys do, and if their girlfriends or wives aren’t around, even the more discreet oglers will probably do it. It should be noted that some guys stare at women and want the women to stare back for the sake of proving to himself that he’s still attractive
That said, try not to take it too seriously and you’ll even stop noticing it until it’s no longer an issue. Remember it’s you, and not those women, who hold the keys to his heart.