Want to do some eye flirting with that hot guy across the room? Here’s your all-in guide to mastering the art of eye contact with men! By Bennett O’Brien
You know the scene – you’re at a bar, an attractive guy is looking at you from across the room. You make eye contact with him, but it feels really awkward. A little while later, he approaches you, but you have no idea if it’s because you’ve been staring at him like some sort of creep.
When you meet a guy you think you might be interested in, making eye contact with him can be a confusing, and sometimes, nerve-wracking ordeal. Should you look into his eyes? Should you demurely look away? Should you look down at your finger nails? Do you look like an idiot for flicking your gaze back and forth? [Read: All about the first glance and love at first sight]
The situation can be awkward. It can be made even more awkward if you have never met the person before, so you aren’t exactly sure what level of eye contact would be acceptable. You don’t want to give too much or too little. Also, you don’t want to seem weird while you are trying to figure this all out.
How to make eye contact with guys
There’s no one surefire way to lock gazes with a guy, but you can try some of these methods to make sure you don’t end up embarrassing yourself.
#1 Try to make conversation. This may seem simple, but it can definitely be effective. If you are just staring at a guy, and not a lot of conversation is happening between the two of you, you’ll find that the dead air can be intimidating.
Conversation can help smooth over the potential awkwardness of eye contact. Once the conversation gets flowing, you probably won’t even be thinking about eye contact that much and neither will he. Instead, you both will be thinking about the conversation, and how you each are going to respond next. After a few minutes of talking, eye contact will feel much more natural.
#2 Laugh at his jokes. Even if you don’t think that they are all that funny, laughing at his jokes will help to ease the tension between the two of you. Plus, it will help give him confidence. If he is feeling confident, then he is much more likely to relax. And if he relaxes, then the chances are that the conversation will feel a lot more comfortable. This will make it easier to make eye contact.
#3 Give him compliments. Giving him compliments is another great way to help eye contact feel less awkward. In a similar way to laughing at his jokes, giving the guy you are talking to compliments will help him to feel confident and relaxed. This can drain some tension out of the conversation, and can help making eye contact feel a lot more natural. [Read: 25 compliments that guys will never forget]
#4 Smile. Imagine how a guy looks at you when he’s smiling and when he’s not smiling. A smile on your face while looking at someone conveys pleasantness and some level of interest. When you’re not smiling while looking at a guy, it can make the guy think that you’re staring at them and trying to read into the inner recesses of their soul, and that’s definitely awkward. To avoid this, add just a hint of a smile while you lock gazes. [Read: 10 tips to look sexy without even trying]
#5 Read his body language. The body language that the guy you are talking to uses will give you a lot of clues about how much eye contact you should make with him. Here are some signs to look for.
– He is making a lot of eye contact with you. If he is making a lot of eye contact with you, then there is a good chance that he wants you to do the same. At the very least, strong eye contact on his part can let you know that he is probably comfortable with eye contact from you.
– He nods when you are talking. If he is nodding when you are talking, it can be an indication that he likes what you are saying, and he wants you to continue. Nodding is a form of encouragement for you to keep talking to him and to keep looking at him while you do so.
– He is smiling. If he is smiling a lot during the conversation, there is a good chance that he is enjoying himself, and he is comfortable. Whatever type of eye contact you’re doing at that moment, keep it up.
– He is tapping his leg. If you are sitting down at the bar or at a table, and he is tapping his leg, it could definitely be a sign that he is uncomfortable. It could be because he likes you, or he is worried you won’t like him.
In any case, if you sense that he is nervous and is demonstrating this by tapping his legs or fidgeting nervously, it might be a good idea not to make your eye contact game too strong. Staring right at him might intimidate him or make him feel even more uncomfortable. So, you might want to wait until he seems more relaxed to make stronger eye contact. [Read: Why do some guys insist on staring even if you’re not interested?]
– He is yawning. Hopefully this won’t happen, but if he is yawning, that could mean that he isn’t that into the situation. He may be bored by the conversation, or just not that into you. Keeping your eyes locked on him can make him pay better attention to you. But if he still looks bored while looking at you, take it as a sign that he’s not interested, no matter how much eye contact you make.
It’s important to get a feel of how the guy you’re talking to is feeling. One of the many ways you can do this is by engaging in some eye contact to both convey your interest and to see how invested the guy is in your interaction. Of course, you don’t have to just give him a blank stare. You can change it up by fluttering your eyelashes or demurely looking away whenever he says something amusing.
Eye contact isn’t rocket science. It’s all about combining it with positive reactions to make the guy you’re talking to feel more comfortable in your presence. Once you get the hang of it, you’re sure to be attracting way more guys from across the room!
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