There’s an evolutionary secret that can help you understand how to attract men and make them desire you instantly. And the real secret’s right here. By Keith Brown
The science of attraction between the sexes, as complicated as it may seem, is pretty simple to explain in a few lines.
Girls are more easily attracted to a guy who appears healthy and stress-free, has a good level of testosterone which makes him appear more manly and chiseled, and has a protective streak in him which makes him a good mate material and a father.
Guys, on the other hand, are more easily attracted to girls based on their appearance or behavior.
[Read: 30 super sexy ways to get any guy interested in you]
But that’s not it though.
To truly understand how to attract men and how a man’s mind works, we need to get deeper into the concept of attraction from the male point of view.
How to attract men in a way they can’t resist
A guy may like a girl for different reasons, but when it comes to physical or sexual attraction at first sight, her physical appearance and her behavior matters more than anything else.
So if you want to attract a man and make him desire you, you just need to get his attention the right way. And the rest, as they say, is history! [Read: 22 ways to get a guy’s attention in any circumstance]
You need to keep this in mind though, love and attraction are two completely different things. A guy may find you extremely attractive, yet he may not end up falling in love with you for his own reasons. [Read: 20 reasons why a guy may never like you back]
But for love to blossom in the first place, you need to build the sexual attraction before you make him fall in love with you. It’s the safest way to make sure the guy falls for you and stays in love with you. [Read: The 7 stages of love for men]
Attraction and how a man views a woman’s body
As we know that physical attraction plays a very big part in attracting a guy, you need to understand what a guy’s mind tells him when he sees you and sizes you up.
When a guy sees a girl’s physical assets, he subconsciously sees more than just your breasts or your butt. The right curves in all the right places tells a guy that a girl is fertile and has come of age, and that she’s healthy because her body can afford to waste energy on developing her curves which play the biggest role in sexual attraction.
A guy may think a girl is attractive. But in his subconscious mind, he’s gauging you as the woman who may carry his offspring one day. [Read: Evolution and the parts of a woman's body that has the biggest impact on men]
Testosterone and a man’s sexual preference
Every man produces testosterone, a sexual hormone, in his testes. And women produce a small amount of testosterone in their ovaries. The more testosterone a man produces, the more manly he looks and the more sexually virile he is. His facial features appear manlier, his jaws are wider and more chiseled and his voice is deeper.
And several studies have shown that the more manly a man is, the more attracted he’d be to women who exhibit feminine traits *girlie, cute traits*.
On the other hand, a small percentage of men who produce a lesser-than-normal amount of testosterone may find themselves getting more attracted to women who are less feminine and more controlling and dominant in the relationship.
So if you’re trying to catch the attention of a typical guy *a large percentage of men have normal or high production of testosterone even though the overall average testosterone levels have dropped significantly in American men over the last 50 years*, chances are, he’d love you if your behavior is more feminine, cute and girly! [Read: Do guys prefer dating cute, shy girls over other girls?]
The perfect woman for a real man – She’s cute and sexy
A regular man who isn’t suffering from low testosterone would always find a feminine woman more attractive than a woman who thinks femininity is overrated and displays traits that are traditionally considered manly.
While a girl’s physical appearance is the biggest sign of femininity, at times, it helps if you can display more femininity in your behavior. No, I’m not saying pink frills and scented paper. But there are always other ways to appear cuter and get a guy to take a second and third look at you. [Read: 10 ways to get a guy to notice you and fall for you without even talking to him]
Why do guys like cute girls?
Men have always been the more aggressive sex in the human species. They’re usually the ones who spread their legs wider, stand tall and swell their chest up while trying to appear threatening all the time, more so when they’re in an argument or when they meet someone they see as a threat in any manner.
But cute changes everything. When a girl behaves in a cute and feminine manner, it brings out the protective instincts of a man. Instead of feeling threatened by a feminine girl, he feels protective about her. That makes him feel more masculine, and that’s something every guy loves to feel! [Read: Why men love a damsel in distress and feel more emotionally connected to them]
When a girl reveals her vulnerable side to a guy, it’s very hard for any guy to ignore her or avoid noticing her vulnerability. And the instant his mind connects with her vulnerability, it eliminates any thoughts of a threat and his protective side creates a bond of protection and attachment with her.
He feels the need to be around her, and his subconscious mind tries very hard to make her feel protected, comfortable and loved around him. He loses his aggressive stance, the tone of his voice softens down, and his shoulders droop down towards her instead of spreading wide. And before he even gives attraction a second thought, he’d realize that he likes the girl already! [Read: The right way to talk to a guy and make him like you]
Traits of a cute and feminine girl that draw real man
Many girls are against the idea of being feminine or behaving in a cute manner. To a typical feminist, behaving in a demure or coy manner is a sign of weakness. And they can’t accept that a guy finds a cute *and dare, we say it… submissive* girl more attractive than a girl who likes to be a non-girlie girl.
If you’re feminine, you don’t really have to be cute. But if you can pull off a perfectly cute personality, it would only add to your allure and make you more desirable among men.
To understand cute behavior better, all you need is to interact with a couple of Japanese or Thai girls whose behavior isn’t influenced by us Americans. They’re not meek or silly, nor do they have to behave like stupid bimbos to win a guy’s affection. All they have to do is flaunt what sets them apart, and that’s their femininity and grace. [Read: 10 easy moves to appear a lot more graceful and feminine]
And no testosterone laden guy can resist the allure of a sweet Asian girl when he’s having a conversation with her. Everything about them makes them appear more beautiful and feminine, right from their cute heart signs with inverted hands, the way they nod their heads, the way they behave while having a conversation with you to the way they smile coyly and yet so warmly.
Femininity comes naturally to some girls *not just Asian girls*, but it’s an art that’s worth learning. If you want to know how to attract men, all you need to do is exude your feminine side while talking to them. And once you try that, you’ll know what I’m talking about. [Read: How to flirt with a guy without really flirting at all]
And remember, a cute girl who displays her feminine side will always have an edge over all other girls when she’s trying to catch the attention of a real man!
How to bring out your feminine side naturally
Femininity comes naturally. But cuteness can be created by the way you behave. Here are 25 tips to behave in a cute way that can help you get as cute as a button in no time.
Additionally, if you’re on a date with a guy and want to come across as a girl who’s in touch with her femininity, here are a couple of tips for you.
#1 Dress in softer pastel colors like peach or mauve. The color will give your skin tone a healthy glow that makes you look warm and likeable instantly.
#2 Smile more often. A smile can make you appear more pleasant and friendly.
#3 Run your fingers through your hair delicately. Always works for any guy!
#4 Tip your head slightly downwards when you’re blushing or smiling, and look at him from under your eyebrow.
These four tips may sound bizarre for a feminist or a cute-bashing girl, but trust me, it will do wonders for your date! [Read: How to impress a guy in 13 oh-so-awesome ways]
A tip to remember – Don’t be yourself if you can be better
Contrary to popular belief, don’t be yourself. Evolve.
When someone tells you that the best way to attract someone is by being yourself, well, they’re not entirely right. All of us change all the time. And not every change that we see in ourselves may be in the right direction.
Who are you? How would you define yourself? We are who we are because of our socioeconomic status, the people around us, and other influences we’ve had in our lifetime. A lucky few may have had the opportunity to be influenced by the perfect examples, while most of us have to change to become better individuals. Or worse, we never get to become better individuals or achieve the full potential that’s within us because we’re convinced we’re all perfect already. [Read: 25 life-changing lessons you need to learn to perfect your life]
You don’t have to change yourself just to attract men, but change yourself to become a better you. Have you ever walked into a room full of attractive women, and found yourself thinking that a few of those girls were better than you in some way? When you meet a woman and find yourself in awe of her for any reason at all, it only means you admire and want some particular trait of hers that you lack yourself.
If you like a trait about a friend, be it her spontaneity, her courage, her carefree attitude, her posture, or the way she dresses up, your mind may subconsciously like that trait because you want to see that trait in yourself. A change of this kind is good, where you see something you like and want to see that in yourself. [Read: Why inner beauty is far more important than outer beauty]
A girl who is the epitome of perfection in every way *if she does exist* won’t be awed by anyone else. On the other hand, everywhere she goes, she’d be the girl that would receive compliments, stares and awed jaws!
So change often, become the dream girl you fantasize about in your head, and be the girl you really want to be. And life will turn out to be so much better for you, be it about men, work, friends or anything else.
It’s easy to push a thought away and assume it’s wrong to be feminine or assume it’s a bad thing to change. But trust me, change is good. And change is inevitable. So you’re going to change whether you like it or not. And you have a choice to become a better you, or a worse you. [Read: 10 ways to achieve perfection in every step you take]
The last word about the science of attraction between the sexes
We’re all animals, and you shouldn’t forget that. We may be wearing pants or walking on two feet, but that doesn’t change our primal instincts. We still chase each other and woo each other just like the animals in the wild. [Read: 23 must-know relationship advice for women]
The male and female sexes still play games to win each other’s affection. Human males still like to woo a female through their display of brute strength, dexterity or their sheer awesomeness. And a man laden with male hormones wants a woman who’s graceful and feminine, because subconsciously, it makes him feel more like a man.
You don’t have to pretend to be dumb or weak, nor do you have to behave like the weaker sex just to attract a man. All you need to do is revel in your femininity and display your cuteness, and give the man you like a chance to bask in his manliness and show off his protectiveness!
[Read: The Lovepanky dating girl code all girls need to know]
Understanding how to attract men is really simple. Enjoy your femininity and let the world see it. The men will come, yes, they’ll come in droves!
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Honestly stopped reading when you mentioned Asian girls and continued on for a paragraph or two. Guys say they don’t like being compared, but go on an compare girls to other girls. It’s like someone saying ‘oh, girls like big penises. Check out any black guy’s package and you could see why no girl in their right mind would deny one. Wait though, there are a lot of guys who are well endowed *not just black guys* – but mainly black guys’. See what i’m saying? I’m half thai myself, and have met many MANY terribly not cute Asian girls – and white, black, hispanic, every girl of the ‘racial rainbow’.
Another offensive stereotype: “To a typical feminist, behaving in a demure or coy manner is a sign of weakness. And they can’t accept that a guy finds a cute *and dare, we say it… submissive* girl more attractive than a girl who likes to be a non-girlie girl.”
Bullsh1t. There is no ‘typical’ feminist who is into the manipulation and acting suggested by this article because those things are universally offensive and suggest, like dress codes and curfews for women, that men are not thinking creatures but only life support systems for a set of gonads. Feminism is about being yourself, not buying into some b.s. and outdated cultural meme.
I do agree with the fact that the more feminine you are, the more masculine men you will attract. It’s biological (mainly due to estrogen and testosterone levels).
However, this article is SO wrong on so many levels.
Being feminine is about being who you really are as a woman. This is a mixture of softness, strenght, maturity, gentleness, sex appeal and beauty (inner and outer). The stereotypes this article states are just contributing to bringing down women. You shouldn’t change who you are no matter what…even if it’s for attracting guys.
And no, “typical” feminists want to promote women strength and capacities. They want EQUALITY. As in, men=women. Does that mean they think very cute/submissive/beautiful/feminine women are weak? No. Since ALL kinds of women AND men are equal no matter what.
one word BS! Im obviously never gonna attract anyone then, im a strong woman and would never change who i am to plz a man or up my chances of attracting one, cos what will happen, that guy will eventually see though ur facade and either take a disliking to u cos u werent wat he expected or that u acted and played him to win him over, i can see a guy ever respecting a girl like that
I think what was trying to be said was “be yourself and push yourself to be the person you want to be and it will build your confidence when you’re comfortable with who you are”.
Not only are you looking for a good man but also for a man who is good for you. If you develop and strengthen your natural skills and abilities you will be able to attract exactly the type of guy you need into your life.. It isn’t that men don’t find women attractive in pants or when they are dressed comfortably – they just don’t notice them as easily. It doesn’t catch their eye like sparkly earrings, pretty colors or flowing dresses and long hair does. Conversely, a powerfully dressed woman (think lots of red) makes most men think of sex, or not notice her at all. She may have a soft side, but if men can’t see it, they often don’t know it exists. The more feminine (softer) a woman dresses, the more men she will attract.
Omg! omg! Can’t believe this! Evrythng worked on the first time itself! He was away for the weekend with his buddies n I was all alone! I gave him his space n happily talked to him when he returned, dressed cute for the evening n he’s dying to spend the next weekend with me! Never ever happened in 3 yrs! Thanks a ton!
Who says feminists can’t be cute and feminine? This article is littered with horrible sterotypes regarding feminist, asian women, and men.
This is a load of BS! I am an Asian woman and I hate the fact that we are seen as feminine, delicate, and cute! It bothers the shit out of me because it is a stereotype and I hate being labeled with that tag on me! Well, truth is. I am not one of those Asian woman who are like that because I was raised strongly and to disrespect men who does not show any respect for me. Besides, you do have to be yourself when you want to get a good guy. You can’t be fake! Once they found out that the girl was a fake the whole time just to get their attention, they will get mad.
Though I agree with Serena over the article. I will say… we as Americans are failing to appreciate our gender differences. Just read an article which may or may not be true that American men have 40% average less testosterone than 50 years ago.
Completely, personally I feel perfectly fine being feminine/cute and still maintaining my strengths/including career accomplishments and abilities to work hard in a variety of different fields (that may be labeled more or less masculine or feminine)
BTW true feminists should be willing to fight for men’s equality as well, and hopefully not criticize them for not fighting for yours. We beat men up emotionally more in this culture than ever before and then tell them they aren’t /can’t be man enough for us.
I’m a guy and I just don’t get a few girls girls who’ve commented here! Every time a guy says something truthful (in this case, the author), and it makes you feel insecure, you just jump down his throat and try to force him to say he’s wrong!
I completely agree with this article, 100 percent! I saw this on a page that was linked in a forum where a girl was bitching and moaning about how screwed up men are. But hey, don’t you get it? This is what men want. And this is what men find irresistible! Men want to be like men, and there’s nothing wrong with women displaying their femininity.
The article is so long, and talks about so many things and tips, but all you women who feel threatened by feminine girls just jump on one point the author claims, that Asian girls behave in a more feminine way. Do you even see how you’re all behaving? Like insecure brats!! Just read the whole article and stop picking the one thing that makes you feel insecure, for crying out loud!! Instead, try to understand a guy’s mind better.
And just a word of advice, you bitching or moaning here won’t change a way a guy thinks. And you commenters can’t change a guy’s view just by claiming guys should like unfeminine girls instead of feminine girl!
THIS ARTICLE IS DEAD ON! The author knows her stuff! Good job!
I think you people need to watch”Shallow Hal”
Lol!
Yep. As a guy, I find this accurate.
i also totally agree with that article. This person totally understands us men and i just have to say to all the girls here who disagree is that you don´t have to accept the fact that you have to behave different from usual but they should accept the fact that that´s how men are. We just like these kind of girls and even though i don´t hate girls who are self confident i wouldn´t want to date a girl who isn´t the least bit feminin. It´s the same for girls. Girls also have tipical imaginations of how a boy should be and we boys just have to accept this fact wether we like it or not. I just think it´s funny that the girls on this site don´t want to accept it but on the contrary won´t accept a boy for what he is.
Greetings from germany